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Question: This question is rattling around in my brain since I began dressing and have lots of thoughts of hormones and even thought of SRS because the more I dress the more I want to be a woman and want to be a woman when I depart this life for the next one
I know this is a dream and fantasy but the thoughts are very powerful now and even scary
SaraHey Michelle there’s so much to know about HRT. I’ll recommend 2 things to get you started.
First, get into gender therapy. If you have gender dysphoria, you’re a good candidate for HRT. Therapy will help you figure that out.
Second, do tons of research. Learn everything you can about HRT. There are significant risks. There are a wide range of physical and psychological effects. Some you probably aren’t aware of.
Honestly, you’ll need to look on other sites for most of this info. Reddit has a ton of subs that get into the weeds. There are a number of blogs that have good info. Then there are a multitude of academic and clinical papers if you can tolerate highly technical info.
/EA
Yes.
I have already gone far past cross dressing. I transitioned almost a year ago, I am transgender, a trans woman. I had open heart surgery 17 months ago and if it wasn’t for the fact that estrogen treatment can cause blood clots, I would have gone on HRT hormones a soon as I could. I’ve already thought about breast augmentation and getting an orchiectomy even if I can’t do HRT.
Here in British Columbia, Canada, the provincial government actually supports transgender people, and our medical coverage covers most GCS and HRT. They have a website called Transcare BC, here’s a link if you’re interested: http://www.phsa.ca/transcarebc/
Hugs girls,
Ms. Lauren M
It seems a common thought among the girls. There is a lot of information on the internet and I have read a lot. I am not as young as some and felt that I wouldn’t have surgery or hormones as I am able to present quite well without. Last year I was at my doctors for an unrelated issue and after she chatted about my living as a woman and suggested hormones then after further discussion I decided I would as my circumstances allowed. I was realistic that there would be no magic changes and it would probably be a long time for any discernible change to be obvious, which has been the case. Hormones have differing effects on individuals and are usually done with surgeries to make dramatic changes.
The notion of physically changing myself to match a single gender does not seem to enter into my psychological equation. Having said that, I thoroughly enjoy and am quite satisfied creating the best presentation of femininity I can, and will always strive to improve. I also enjoy the duplicity – or the illusion of duplicity – and the notion of uniting my two personas is something I do not feel a need to do. I fully support those that do feel this need, it just is not me.
First, I’d like to note that SRS is an outdated term. Gender Confirmation Surgery (GCS) is the generally accepted term today.
There are many ways to become more feminized that could be combined with or done exclusive of HRT and GCS.
For example, some girls do a social transition, essentially living full time as women, but without any medical treatment.
Or someone might take an anti-androgen to reduce testosterone to female levels. Having an orchiectomy does the same thing permanently. Either one of those steps will cause some breast growth since the male body produces a small amount of estrogen.
Or a girl might get facial feminization surgery (FFS) and nothing else.
There are a number of other options/steps one can take. Any one of them increases feminization and goes “beyond” crossdressing.
I would also offer that being a woman is a state of mind. Some of us are wired this way. Girl Brain. We’re no less of a woman than someone that’s undergone a full slate of medical treatments.
So to answer Sara’s question, yes I think about HRT and GCS all the time. I’ve been on estrogen monotherapy for almost 16 months. OMG it works! It’s very likely I’ll have GCS and FFS at some point in the future.
I’ll also add that if you’re seriously considering some form of transition, you should also consider gender therapy to help sort things out. It’s important to be sure since your life WILL change in a big way. And a therapist’s recommendation is required for some treatments.
/EA
Hi Sara I’ve often thought about it over the years, but the thing is that I’m a bit to old to go through all the process of becoming a woman I’m 70 this year, and also I’m married and still in the closet, if i was single then that would be a different question, I would live as a woman 24/7 and maybe try for a bigger bust,
Hugs Rozalyn X
I’m trans. I’ve always been. I just didn’t know what I was and thought I had to hide myself from the world. The clothes were only a bit of it. I know I felt less depressed and less suicidal when I was femme. But I thought there was something wrong with me. I finally understood me in my early 30s when being transgender became more common. But never thought I’d do anything about it. Not wanting to be alone running a business and not thinking I’d be accepted. Finally I decided no more living a lie. I started HRT on my 45 birthday and am coming up on 2 years I intend to get srs and probably a ba too. Otherwise I’m natural and have inner peace and happiness I’ve never felt. And my business as good as ever
Hi Sarah, thanks for the post. I have often thought about HRT through out my journey. I think if I hadn’t got married I could honestly see myself transitioning but after having open heart surgery and tip toeing into the 70’s it probably wouldn’t be a good idea and I’m actually happy with my my life the way it is now. I still dress and go out often and usually have no issues with passing so really, for me, there’s no point.
Trish 💖
Yes, I think about it a lot, but I know I am never going to act in it. Years of me my male self have given me a beautiful family, a loving wife, and lots of friends. I have just found a balance that works for everyone. Could my life be better, sure, but it could be a whole lot worst. I just try to enjoy who I am with what I have.
I know I am a man with a need to express my feminine side. So while I might fantasize about what it would be like to be a woman, taking such a step is not something I would seriously consider doing. I am just happy to be able to realize the benefits of exploring both my masculine and feminine sides.
No, I haven’t given serious thought to hormones or surgury.
First off, I still consider myself a crossdresser. I’m happy when home to have on a skirt and top or dress without forms, without a wig, without makeup. I enjoy transforming myself into a woman, but it is a learned behavior, because it is a necessary step to going out wearing these clothes. Yes, I know that it isn’t absolutely necessary, but I will definitely draw attention if I go out as a man in women’s clothing, but probably not as a woman in women’s clothing.
Second, I considered myself better than 90% sure that I wouldn’t. But the question “How can you be sure” never had a satisfactory answer. When the lock downs from COVID hit a few years ago, I realized it was an opportunity to run the experiment that wouldn’t otherwise be run. I wanted to see how I would feel from “overdosing” on my dressing.
I would say for better than a year, I spent more than 90% of my time dressed, wearing forms (I have sleep safe forms), a wig (or just clip-on bangs with my long hair). I went shopping, went for walks in my neighborhood (and made a friend who I would pass while walking). If I was ordering out from a place I don’t go to all that often, I would pick up food for takeout en femme as well.
The results I came up with were that I still don’t want to transition, but could be comfortable presenting as Alison for long periods of time. I think I’ve proved to myself that I don’t want permanent chemical or physical changes, because this extended time didn’t make me consider these choices any more than when I started.
Hi Sara
I have had the same thoughts as you at times.
When I have been dressing, I have thought about taking it a little bit further however these thoughts are very brief as at this stage, I don’t plan on transitioning and don’t see myself doing that because I do also like living my male life as well.
However as someone who has been dressing for less than 12 months, I may change my mind in 5-10 years time as I get the chance to experience and explore more. I have found in recent years (even before before COVID) that anything could happen in 12 months so you know for me.
Jacinta xoxo
Right now, it is a no.
When I introduced Wendy to my wife, the one of the first questions she asked was “do you want to be a woman ?”. I answered no. If I were to fully transition it would bring a whole new dynamic to this marriage, one I am not prepared to undergo.
Besides, when I answered no I fully committed to being a male in this relationship. For now, I am more than happy transforming into Wendy and living myself as a male.
In all honesty, god forbid should anything happen to myself I have had thoughts about transitioning to being a woman. But as of right now, I am good with being able to CD with my wife’s support.
Hi Sara. Like you and several others mentioned, yes, I think about it a lot (and honestly, who doesn’t?), but unless everything in my life were to change completely, it will never happen. It remains another one of those thoughts that rattles around in my brain, looking for a place to land, but the reality is that those steps won’t ever happen.
Hugs,
Holly
Hiya! I started HRT. I’m on my way to the real me. Contemplating an orchiectomy next. Will give it a few months to see how the androgen blocker shrinks things. Hugs, Debbie Lynn
You will be surprised how quickly ones body starts changing! Ive been on hormones for about 5months and im definitely not a person that looks very male anymore as ive got hips and a very slight bust and once i put a pad in my bra my breasts are normal size say around a 38b cup and as for my male bits i no longer can see them as shrunken so much, i gradually getting a more pear shaped figure and i have curves in all the right places finally also i dont have to shave very much as leg hair gone body hair very minimal and soft to touch when does grow, i hope you become everything youve dreamed of as starting hormones for me has been the making of myself as that perfect woman that was just below the surface, im so glad i took the plunge with hormones and Id say to anyone think hard before you start as its the 1st step of transformation into a beautiful woman x
Hi Krissy! Thank you so very much for sharing your experience with hrt! My dream is for a curvy womanly body! Truly appreciate learning about your progress. Hugs, Debbie Lynn
Hi Kissy
You are so lucky and I am so jealous of you and your ability to shape your destiny. My destiny is etched in the body that I was born with all those years ago. As much as I wish I could the reality is I can’t and or won’t at this point and thanks to this site at least now I have the ability to cover it up and feel like a woman.
Sara
When I first started to regularly dress, when I finally allowed myself to after decades of repression, I thought about it occasionally. Now that I have found a comfortable place between both versions of me I am very happy and don’t think about it much at all. Although every time I tuck by breast forms into my bra I do wish I could know what it would feel like if they were real. Oh to have the power to make them appear when I want and disappear when I don’t! 🤣
But I do realize that a great many ladies on this site struggle daily with the bodies they were born with and my heart and my love goes out every one to them!
💖Lola
i said no for the reason is that i will be a female after i pass away and i will be reincarnated to a female
Hi Lucinda.
I had to ask the question because I know it is too late for me with this tattered old weathered body especially above the shoulders. They only good looking woman above the shoulders would be Granny. Still though since coming out even if only in private these thoughts keep rattling around wishing and hoping and dreaming that a fantasy might come true before the next life. I have the natural man breasts “C” cup and only wish that one morning I could wake up and Charlie and the twins would be gone too.
Sara
Hi Sara, it seems that voting is pretty equal. I’ve chosen the HRT route myself though bottom surgery in New Zealand is very expensive on a personal level otherwise it’s a 14 year waiting list to get the surgery through our health system!
I’m 67 and I haven’t regretted my decision at all… I’ve been on estrogen for nearly two years and I brought my first bra as my Christmas present. Funnily enough, as soon as my breasts started to grow I abandoned the silicone I was using as a crossdresser. At last I had my own real breasts and that was a huge personal validation.
love to you all, Polly
Sara, if you asked me this when I was in elementary school yes would be my only answer, but those were different times, the subject would never come up like it would today. So here I am 60 some years later having done all the male things that I have, married, having a child, running a business, friends, a home and so on and doing it as a semi closeted CD wanting to be more feminine but not wanting to loose what I’ve gained in this life, my wife being the biggest part.
So I’ll put on my bra and panties and Yummi jeans and go to Home Depot, feeling as much of a woman I can be, without going to steps 2 and 3 and be the happy self that I am.
But in my next life you’ll all be so jealous of me!
Hugs
Sherri
Hi Sherri
Thank you you post Sherri.
You know what? you read my mind although I am divorced and on my own now. I am 73 and I also have thought that if I was 55-60 years younger in todays society and acceptance that it would be a whole different world for. I was a pretty good looking teenager tall and thin and I bet it wouldn’t have taken much to make the change happen on hormones but like you I had a career and a family because that was the accepted way of life for us.
So like you look out in my next life because I am going to be one knockout looking girl with a whole lot of time to make up for. And there will not be any “Charlie and the twins” in the picture.
Sara
Hello, Sara. Yes I have thought about going the next steps. I have always wanted to be a woman but like most of us I cannot afford it and most of my family would definitely disown me as soon as they found out. If it was just me I would already have started the next step. Lots of Huge Hugs, Allysa
Yes the price is expensive as in uk you can get the op on national health service but its the other things one needs to do that cost! As one i do have my op ill wanna have a bit of cosmetic surgery and all the hair removal and laser work will cost but ill get there one day soon and im hoping ill have enough by the end of year or this time next year as i don’t think i can keep on being a at birth male as i want all the treatments soon as life is on hold til i get the op, ok i pass as a female but i dislike the male bit of my body and the sooner they chop it and give me the genitals i should of been born with the better as who wants to be a male when you can be a beautiful woman that turns heads and looks so cute in a dress, cant wait if i had the money id go for it 2moro as ive waited far too long to be the authentic me x
a
I can honestly say its something i never used to think about but over the last 2,3 years its a thought that i think about daily as 1day i do want to be as femme as possible and due to the hormones my male bits are tiny and of no use to any female or male, so yes i think everyday how will it be when my time is due and will i be able to slide into the female world? Think i do alright as once my bio female friends help me with dressing and make up i pass very well as we go out on a Friday or Saturday night and we dont just go to trans friendly pubs and clubs we go to any that take our fancy, so yes i think about and even dream about it and sometimes i wake up and for a split second i think i was born a girl! Doesnt most people in our circle think about being as bio female as one can? I hope so as i do everyday, the thought is like a mole digging in ones brain and ill always be the way i am as i cant be any other way as make a pretty useless man and better off being a beautiful sexy 50something lady as i enjoy everything that goes with being that and glad im being true and no longer in that river in Egypt DENIAL As it will tear you apart if you dont be the authentic you ive found xx
To All:
I have been crossdressing to some degree for over 50 yrs. As I have gotten older, I care less and less what others think. Only my Mistress/Mrs.’ opinion matters to me. I certainly would love to fill a nice bra, but not going the entire way anymore. I hold a very important ‘MALE’ role in this family and that keeps me from ‘outing’ completely. So I accept that I am destined to be a “part-time” girl for the rest of my days.
Twinkie B.
I voted no . But , 23 years ago , I was in the transition phase . I had just finished with the counseling and was about to start on estrogen therapy . A week before I was to start , I became nervous and backed out . I do sometimes wonder what I’d look like if I had gone through with everything but , I don’t dwell on it . I’m happy as a crossdresser .
No form of permanent transition will be on my horizon. I prefer being an occasional crossdresser. I like that I can remove the forms and clothes and stash them in a bureau. I do not need or want to be a woman full time. I am living my best life as a bearded lady or a man in a dress in the privacy of my apartment and then underdressing for a night out with my girlfriend.
Hi Janet! Actually I didnt think I could do it until I actually did it…going on HRT. I had my annual physical and opened up to my doctor. She asked me if I had considered HRT? I said yes. So we discussed this and the next thing I know we agreed to get the balls moving! Yup. It was that easy! Once again reaffirming why it is truly in our best interests to be open and honest. By the way, I did not discuss this with my spouse. I felt this was my health decision.
When I picked up prescriptions I told her. She simply said it was my decision and that’s how we left it. Hugs, Debbie Lynn
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