• This topic has 49 replies, 32 voices, and was last updated 1 week ago by Emily.
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    • #432007
      Emily
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      Registered On: April 30, 2016
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      Congrats on the successful shopping outing! Isn’t it a wonderful feeling? The more you go out and realize how people pay very little attention to their surroundings, the more confident you get. I go out 3-4 times a week. Sometimes shopping, sometimes just for a walk. The first time I went for a walk, I was extremely nervous. Then I realized that the worst thing that could happen is that someone would notice that I was a man dressed as a woman, that never happened. I also thought about the fact that possibly I could be an encouragement to someone who has been wanting to go out but hasn’t yet raised the courage. Either way, I’m hooked and will continue to go pretty much wherever I want to.

    • #431490
      Grace Scarlett
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      Registered On: July 26, 2020
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      Mindy

      Four little words….please go for it !!!

      Four more….you will love it !!!

      Best wishes, grace xx

       

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      • #431539
        Mindy Mills
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        Registered On: January 8, 2021
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        I went in and shopped. Was a huge adrenaline rush. Picked up the grocery items I needed and some clothes.

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        • #431742
          Prudence
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          Registered On: January 7, 2020
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          Congratulations Mindy! The first of many outings!!!!   Hugs Pru

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    • #431091
      Alice Underwire
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      Registered On: September 16, 2019
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      Hi Mindy,

      Congratulations on being confident to enter the store.  Welcome to CDH!

      Great plan to do your grocery shopping as Mindy.  You can use the self check-out station.

      Alice

    • #431000
      Katie Bforever
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      Registered On: November 5, 2020
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      I remember those days, I used to feel like I was going to die one step out of my car. But once I took that step it was the greatest experience of my life, I totally will go anywhere in public pre COVID and not even care about anyone or anything. Remember confidence is key!! without that you will stick out and be clocked. I encourage anyone who hasn’t done it to try.

      • #431047
        Laura Lovett
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        Registered On: March 26, 2020
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        It’s true that confidence is key, but the key to that key is in enjoying the moment.

        As a part-time dresser, I still get nervous after parking up – and one of the worst things to do is sit and contemplate what you’re about to do – that stuff brings on the stage fright!

        What I started to do is pull up into a space, and check my makeup. On my Brighton trips, I always stop at Cobham Services and put my makeup on.

        The act of doing that, and seeing the results puts me into a dreamy space, where confidence suddenly becomes a given, and any problems with my appearance are in other people’s minds, ergo, nothing to do with me at all.

        I step out of the car with only my mission in mind: Coffee (and perhaps the little girl’s room).

        I love that the coffee places call your name. Sometimes people look and smile, but I have never had any problems in a Service station (or any other shop, come to that).

        I don’t look like my profile picture, but like the two pictures in my public photos that don’t have many likes.

        People don’t look twice at a plain looking person – although a 6’4″ woman raises eyebrows and smiles.

        Who cares if they’re laughing at me – I know that I am responsible for that smile, and that’s perfect. I’ve added to the sum total of smiles that day, and caused some of my fellow humans to laugh.

        And I have coffee.

        Win, win, win

        Love Laura

        • #431308
          Cindy Lou
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          Registered On: November 18, 2020
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          Thanks for sharing that Laura, stories like this are extremely important to me as I try to glean little tips here and there while I build up my courage for my first outing. As for those giggles you occasionally might hear, I’ll bet many of them come from men who have CDed themselves or have at least thought about it.

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          • #431739
            Laura Lovett
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            Registered On: March 26, 2020
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            Hi Cindy

            The other half come from women who have a passion for cross dressers!

            I’ve lost count of the number of lovely ladies (usually with perfect makeup and a great sense of style and dress) who have rushed up to me randomly and said things like “Oooh!!! I love girls like you”, or “OMG, You’re my soul mate!” – just like that, a propos of nothing.

            And I mean at Cobham Services at 10.30 in the morning on a Saturday, not in some dodgy bar at closing time… although yes, it happens then too.

            There are people who have a LOT of love for cross dressers, male and female.

            This is why it’s fine to just ignore the haters (or take suitable evasive action!)

            Love Laura

             

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          • #431764
            Cindy Lou
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            There must be a real temptation to follow up on it for you. Positive attention while out like that would be a sweet ego boost whether it came from a man or woman, but to have a random GG act that way to me would be a real head turner.

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          • #431865
            Laura Lovett
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            Registered On: March 26, 2020
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            You are right there, girl.

            On occasions, I’ve had to gently remind the rapt female in question that I am married – I don’t want to lose my new lovely friend so quickly, but when they make it clear what is on their minds, you need to dig deep.

            I’ve been very surprised just how strong Laura is in those situations – I am not talking about subtle hints from some women – I mean it’s like a CD is some kind of aphrodisiac to them, and they become insistent, as if you must be weaker than a “proper man”.

            I’ve been genuinely shocked, but I refuse to ruin my marriage over one night of stupidity – and besides, that sort of behaviour seems blokey to me, and is not alluring.

            But as a confidence boost and validation of my dressing, it’s beyond my wildest dreams, and I can’t deny that I love that sort of attention!

            I draw the line at a dance and a hug. No lip kissing – it smudges the gloss.

            Love Laura

             

             

          • #431888
            Mindy Mills
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            Registered On: January 8, 2021
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            I would absolutely love to have a GG come up to me in public. Being single I’d likely follow up and develop a relationship be it a friendship or more. I am however very leery of strangers male or female that I g do not know or aren’t mutual friends with someone I already know. I always question peoples motives. May sound bad but my self preservation is usually in overdrive, if that makes any sense.

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          • #431964
            Laura Lovett
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            Registered On: March 26, 2020
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            Hi Mindy

            Just keep working it – get an image that you love to see in the mirror, that makes you smile, and you will make others smile too.

            It’s a question of when, not if, so relax and enjoy the ride.

            You’re right to be wary, I’m very wary too – but at the same time, I treat every stranger as a friend I don’t know yet, and I expect them to respect my boundaries, or I’ll know they’re not a friend.

            It is possible to relax and have fun, yet be on your guard – I don’t know how Laura does it, she’s a stronger person than I would be in male mode, that’s for sure!

            But in male mode, I never have women coming up to me declaring that they love me – like I say, it seems to be a real passion for some.

            I’d suggest keeping such an enthusiastic approach at arm’s length until you’ve hung out with them for a while. If they really lik like you and not just your glamourous image, they’ll wait and go along with you.

            Disclaimer: this is just a suggestion, based on my own experiences. I’m not a relationship guidance counsellor, I’m an IT consultant!

            Love Laura

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        • #431157
          Clara Cross
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          Registered On: December 7, 2020
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          Dang, Laura. How did you get so wise, so smart, so sensible? What a gift. Seriously, what a gift.

          Clara

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          • #431251
            Laura Lovett
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            Registered On: March 26, 2020
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            Thank you Clara, I am genuinely in tears and don’t know what to say for once…

            I know, I’m just a big, soppy girl!

            Love Laura

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        • #431108
          Mindy Mills
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          Registered On: January 8, 2021
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          Laura,

          “any problems with my appearance are in other people’s minds, ergo, nothing to do with me at all.”  Good way to put it in perspective. I’ll remember this next time. Yea, I sat there too long thinking about it. I think a big part of why I was able to do it is because of the mask mandate. No amount of makeup will make me passable. What I wore was very plain so I didn’t stand out. I’m 5’11” and wore flats, although I love heels and I can walk in them quite well I thought flats where a better choice in this situation. I was nervous, so much so I tried getting out of my truck while I still had my seatbelt on then once I was in the store I realized I still had Copenhagen in my mouth.  Obviously my male side chews tobacco.

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    • #430980
      Jennyjohn
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      Registered On: January 9, 2021
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      Hopefully you can do this. Next time should be easier. Let us know how it goes.

      Hugs from Jenny

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    • #430939
      Genevïéve
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      Registered On: July 28, 2020
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      That’s wonderful Mindy…. ❤ You are an inspiration to those of us who have yet to make that giant leap…

      Gen… ❤

    • #430936
      Hilda Beaumont
      Duchess
      Registered On: March 14, 2020
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      Go for it Mindy. I remember my first time going to my local supermarket – ASDA – early one winter morning it was only just beginning to get light so the store was quite empty. My heart was pumping and I was scared that I would get verbal abuse but nothing could have been further from the truth. The few people who were there more or less ignored me. One man said’ “Excuse me ma’am” as he leaned across in front of me to get a purchase. The checkout girl didn’t turn a hair although I suspect she knew I was a cross dress and I had the courage to ask her to take a photo of me on my phone. She readily agreed and it is one of my favourite ‘snaps’ in my cross dressing collection. Since then I’ve been out into the world as HildaRuth on many occasions and invariably I’ve been accepted.

      HRxx

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    • #430928
      Natalie Moore
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      Registered On: June 3, 2020
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      I was the same way, I’d get all dressed up then pull into the parking lot and sit there in procrastination, it’s really tough to get out of the car and walk into that store especially if you’re wearing something like heels. Lots of questions go through your mind. “Am I going to pass?” “ is someone going to notice I’m not a woman?” “Will I get flustered if someone speaks to me?” When you get out the car and walk inside the store keep telling yourself you just another woman in the store shopping. Don’t worry if people take a glance or look, it’s scary at first believe me then the more you go out and become more comfortable you’ll start not caring. I was so uncomfortable at first then I said to myself, people can think what they want, I can’t control that. I’ve been out many many times and never had a bad experience where someone confronted me. Go out and enjoy the world as a woman! Screw them all haha! It’s my body and my own clothing! Who are they to say any different.?
      Best of luck in your future outings

      Natalie

    • #430902
      Penny Jay
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      Registered On: August 4, 2020
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      Well done you, nothing stopping you now!

      PennyJ

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    • #430896
      Bianca Everdene
      Lady
      Registered On: April 11, 2017
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      I had to scroll down to find out you did it!!! Well done Mindy❤️

      A right of passage for so many of us, sitting in the car looking fabulous, trying to take that huge metaphorical leap into the outside world, fully expressing your wonderful Mindy in public. Such a buzz first time. Well done Mindy.

      ❤️Bianca

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    • #430876
      Tabitha Tee
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      Registered On: July 30, 2020
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      Really happy for you. Conquering fear is a real achievement!

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    • #430843
      Deborah Sullivan
      Duchess
      Registered On: February 27, 2020
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      Welcome to the sisterhood now Mindy. It was a giant step and made us proud girl

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    • #430836
      Polly Stewart
      Lady
      Registered On: January 2, 2021
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      Hi Mindy

      It was just that way of introducing myself to the world… driving my wife down to the supermarket and just sitting in the car looking out at all the people. Thrilling and ultimately brilliant for acclimatizing to going out for real!
      The trick was… for driving… was realizing that I still drove like a man! Funny but real. Even driving in heels wasn’t a problem it was the physical way that women drive. How they hold their hands on the wheel, how close to the wheel they sit… the gesticulating and verbosity! Hmmm… one other writer said have a bag of groceries in the car… great idea. Once you get over the shock next thing you’ll be stepping it out, Sister!

      Xxx //Polly

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    • #430825
      Rozalyne Richards
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      Registered On: March 10, 2018
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      Hi Mindy well done, i wish i had the courage to go shopping en femme it would be nice to go shopping as Rozalyne,

      You have taken one big step being in the car park now have you got the courage to take an even bigger step and get out of the car and walk into the shop,

      Our thoughts are with you and let us know what you decided xxxxx

      Hugs Rozalyne x

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    • #430785
      Cindy Lou
      Baroness - Annual
      Registered On: November 18, 2020
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      Way to go Mindy, speaking as someone who has not yet taken that first step you have now become one of the people I look up to.

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    • #430774
      Sally Drinkwater
      Duchess
      Registered On: July 15, 2019
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      Just sitting  in the car is a good start to being ‘out and about’.  I sometimes take my own shopping with me to look like I belong there when I go window shopping.

    • #430742
      Amanda Burton
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      Registered On: January 15, 2020
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      Go girl go, congratulations that’s was extremely brave. The sky is the limit now you have broken the ice.

      You may get noticed, but most people are not even bothered, good luck and happy shopping.

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    • #430738
      Regine Rich
      Princess
      Registered On: October 9, 2020
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      Good for you, Mindy, so exciting.You got this girl
      Hugs, Regi

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    • #430670
      Bettylou Cox
      Duchess
      Registered On: May 26, 2019
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      HI Mindy,

      I’m pleased to read that you made it inside; most of us have been in that same place at one time. My own first outing after my first makeover was also to Walmart, where I bought a few things and used the self-checkout counter. But in many subsequent trips, I have gone through the regular lines, and nobody has ever paid the slightest attention to me.

      Hugs,
      BEttylou

    • #430665
      patty williams
      Lady
      Registered On: January 19, 2019
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      Thats so Great Mindy I am so happy for you.

      I did the same thing last year and it was so incredible.

      Thank you for sharing with us we are so proud of you.

      Somebody give that girl a bouquet of roses.

       

      Hugs Patty

    • #430631
      Mindy Mills
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      Registered On: January 8, 2021
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      • #431521
        Laura Lovett
        Lady
        Registered On: March 26, 2020
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        Hi Mindy

        Did I miss the rest of this?

        What happened in the store?

        Did buy anything?

        How did it make you feel?

        How do you feel now?

        I need to know!!!!

        >edge of seat!<

        Laura

        • #431546
          Mindy Mills
          Lady
          Registered On: January 8, 2021
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          I went in. Picked up the groceries items I needed, a scented candle, electric razor for shaving my legs, some pretty smelling body wash, 3 panties, a cute top, a floral print bra, some fuzzy pink pajamas, and a soda.
          I didn’t notice anyone giving me any strange looks, went through the self checkout do I didn’t need to speak to anyone. The whole thing was a huge adrenaline rush. It felt wonderful. I’ll definitely be going out as Mindy more often. I can hardly wait to do it again.

      • #430982
        Caly James
        Lady
        Registered On: November 2, 2020
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        Way to go Mindy!!!  You are truly an inspiration.  You should be so proud!!!

         

        Caly

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      • #430669
        Debbie Lynn
        Lady
        Registered On: July 26, 2020
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        You Go Girl! So Proud of YOU!

        • #430860
          Ginny Virginia
          Lady
          Registered On: December 22, 2020
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          Yes, way to go, Mindy! We are with you in spirit!

          Hugs,

          Ginny

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      • #430636
        Sandy Jayson
        Duchess
        Registered On: September 29, 2019
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        You go girl!!!!  Ono step now, soon more to come?  It can be so satisfying to let your inner woman out!!

        Sandy

         

    • #430628
      Mindy Mills
      Lady
      Registered On: January 8, 2021
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      IDrove to a Walmart a few miles away, one I know is less crowded. Sitting here procrastinating again.

    • #430621
      Clara Cross
      Lady
      Registered On: December 7, 2020
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      Mindy. GO. You got this, girl!

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    • #430619
      Trisha Lilly Langdan
      Lady
      Registered On: December 8, 2020
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      Hi Mindy, go for it. Most of the people in there will be too focused on themselves and the staff are paid to be polite. Plus theyve probably seen stranger thing honey. Go get em and enjoy yourself.

      Love Trish

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