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    • #176300

      I am really pleased to tell you girls that I haven’t purged for over eight years.For many years I went through the cycle of purging.Buying some lovely clothes,shoes,tights.Enjoying wearing them and then the guilt would set in and off I went to dump the clothes.I did this from the time I was 21 when I lived with my parents.Goodness knows how many pairs of pantyhose/ tights I dumped.When I got married when I was 32 I bought clothes regularly.I used to book days off work to dressup.My wife was in work and did not know about my Roberta side then.All the purging stopped back in 2011 aa my wife did know about my femme side though not yet accepting.These days I am able to dress in front of my wife.Thanks to her I have a wardrobe of about 46 skirts,seven dresses,14 pairs of shoes 1 pair of boots and hundreds of pairs of tights/ pantyhose.Plus not nearly enough panties.I only throw away laddered tights or old skirts these days.I am so pleased with myself.

      • This topic was modified 4 years ago by Fiona-Ann Moss. Reason: moved to correct forum
    • #176301

      Thats an awesome progression! I’m so jelly that you have managed to get it all worked out like this 🙂

      Now I just gonna find the girl who is cool with Willow <3

    • #176302

      Oops I posted this in Intros instead of Life As It Goes On.Apologies Ambassadors.

    • #176307
      Anonymous

      That is awesome. I am somewhere in between. I stopped the purging, but the guilt is evil. It comes around still. I try to allow myself to be whoever I want to be when I want. My fem side is very hybrid. I love have some fem edge to my daily outfit, and then there are those occassions when Erica must go all out. I need to keep an eye on the gilt.

    • #176308
      Patty Phose
      Duchess

      Oh yes. Never purge. Only upgrade and replace

    • #176454

      Roberta…..wow…what a wardrobe!   Sweetheart…..it is a two way street, DO remember to add to her collection as well. I can see “Americas Best Dressed Couple” in you both!

      Hugs………

      Dame Veronica.

      • #176471

        [quote quote=176454]Roberta…..wow…what a wardrobe! Sweetheart…..it is a two way street, DO remember to add to her collection as well. I can see “Americas Best Dressed Couple” in you both!

        Hugs………

        Dame Veronica.

        [/quote]
        Oh yes Dame Veronica.I always add to her collection too.We buy all our items at the same time.A dress or two each,shoes even pantyhose and panties.Handbags as well

    • #176455

      Something i find even more difficult than purging is to tidy up my wardrobe,my wife will come through and just shake her head and say i will see you at teatime .I just seem to have the need to try on everything ,and it is probably items of clothing that i may not have even worn in months. Wow ! i forgot i had that it might look nice with a midi denim skirt and under the nee boots and it just goes on and on .That jacket could look great with ect!  ect! ect! what hand bag  would i be able to match  it with.   A nice topic Roberta Py. x.

      • #178858
        Rochelle Mills
        Baroness

        Yep!  As my wardrobe has ballooned over the last few months since coming out to my wife, I now have a need to thin the heard as well of items that were really more wishful thinking.  This especially goes for what I call my “aspirational outfits.”  I have to accept the reality that I will never be small enough for many of these…or the styles, colors, designs, etc., just don’t work so well and I would never realistically would wear it anyplace.

        I, too, simply play around too much with outfit options when I should be putting items in the thrift store donation bag.  I need more drawer and closet space for the better garments!

    • #176468

      [quote quote=176455]Something i find even more difficult than purging is to tidy up my wardrobe,my wife will come through and just shake her head and say i will see you at teatime .I just seem to have the need to try on everything ,and it is probably items of clothing that i may not have even worn in months. Wow ! i forgot i had that it might look nice with a midi denim skirt and under the nee boots and it just goes on and on .That jacket could look great with ect! ect! ect! what hand bag would i be able to match it with. A nice topic Roberta Py. x.

      [/quote]
      Thanks Py.Glad you enjoyed reading my topic xx

    • #176799
      Lynda Lee
      Lady

      I too must have purged an incredible dollar amount of wonderful beautiful clothing over the years! I stopped purging some 20 yrs ago when my then wife came to terms with my dressing…she eventually “out grew” me as a partner and we divorced and luckily have never had to purge again! Living as female now and very happy!

    • #177446

      I’ve never purged at all. For over 20 years, I’ve had items of femme accoutrement scattered throughout the apartment, hidden in drawers and closets, even in a filing cabinet, along with my male stuff.

      But “the shame” never goes away; nor does the urge to purge, brought on by my extreme fear of being “discovered” – by a nosy apartment maintenance man, or my curious housekeeper (I sometimes wonder if she “knows,” but just doesn’t’ say), or by…. who knows?

      HOWEVER, I’m always mindful of the fact that I will probably have to make my one and only final purge, just as the end draws near.

      I’ve documented this dreaded proposition ad nauseum in the topic “Til Death Do We Part” in the Over 50 group.

    • #177449

      This thread is making me wish I had more clothes >.<

      • #178082
        Anonymous

        You would still want more after that Willow. You can’t get enough of a good thing.

        • #178474

          There is truth to this.

          I really need to find a cute outfit for Pride next month, nothing I have is suitable for walking in the summer sun and other excuses 😀

          • #178475
            Anonymous

            Summer sun suggests as little as you can get away with. Maybe them denim shorts without the tights. Enjoy the event whatever the attire.

          • #179251

            I’m a skirt/dress girl 🙂 I’ve found a few sundresses I want to wear on amazon, but haven’t pulled the trigger on the order yet.

            I should, it might cheer me up

    • #177578
      Kelly Lee
      Duchess - Annual

      I done a few purges over the years but they been due to practical circumstances. Moving between cities and even continents and having my parents involved in packing doesn’t invite to keeping a box filled with questionable clothing. It’s now 20+ years since my last big move and that is also last time I was completely clean.
      My current issue is to keep my stash under control. Since only my wife knows and a daughter that tend to raid our closet now and then I can’t hang up anything so it’s all in boxes here and there. Some boxes are also in awkward places so I forget what’s in there and get more of stuff I already have. Due to the storage issue I’m currently very restrictive on any new stuff I get, I always ask my self if it is better than what I already have/why do I need to get this one and so on (and “it’s on sale” is not a valid reason).
      With some luck we will soon be alone at home for maybe a week and then I plan on taking out everything and then pack up some bags for the thrift store. After that maybe I can start getting more again 🙂

       

    • #177673

      Hear hear

    • #177727
      Anonymous

      I have never purged out of fear my spouse or someone else would ‘discover’ my wardrobe……….BUT, my spouse demanded I purge only this spring !!!!  She told me, the drawers in the dresser, the lingerie dresser, the tubs and box’s in the walk in closet, the box’s and chests in the garage, the box’s, bags and chests in the storage area were SIMPLY too much for her,  in case something happened to me…………..OK, it took TWO days to go through ALL of it, and a pick up full or /70’s, /80’s and early /90’s stuff were quietly delivered to goodwill, and the really embarrassing things were personally delivered to the dump……….

      Now, the dressers are still full, the walk in closet still has tubs and box’s, but I get more space in the garage and the storage building !!!!

      Does that qualify as ‘purging’ ??

      Mikki

      • #177730
        Kelly Lee
        Duchess - Annual

        I think that qualify as tinning or something like that. I think everyone (male/female) has clothes (and probably other things also)  they haven’t used in decades and looking at them realizing that it will probably never be used again, at least not by you. I read somewhere that 80% of the time you use 20% of the closet. Don’t know if that’s true, I have a feeling that as time goes it may start at 100/100 (since you just have 2 skirts and a dress) but as you collect stuff it becomes more like 95/10 since you need to change multiple times per day to get some turnover of your now huge stash.

        I was planning on doing a “spring cleaning” next week but now that seems to not happening, son leaving but relatives visiting = no time to spread out all cloths and sort.

    • #178819
      Becka
      Lady

      Whenever I purged it was out of pure guilt, as I had a deep feeling I was doing something wrong and would vow to myself to never do it again.

      Like that would ever happen.

      My challenge now (that I do not purge) is, where to put everything!  I still have to hide my heels, bras and panties.  My gurl jeans look like any other jeans and really, all my guy jeans are pushed to the back of the closet as I rarely wear them!

      Love to you all!

      R.

      • #178943

        Exactly, instead of a bag of stuff stashed I have two bags, heels in the closet behind shoes, a garment bag full of things, and another small stash that is easy to grab for business trips.

      • #179346
        Mary Jay
        Lady

        are girl jeans better.. ? how ?

        Maybe i missed the train or something.. do they hide new technology ?

        • #179414
          Anonymous

          I think it’s psychological as the are female jeans and you are wearing them.

    • #179351
      Anonymous

      I purged once.  It was deeply emotional.  I cried a little.

    • #179443

      I dred to think how much money I’ve waisted purging , my last time time was about 3 years ago in a fit of anger I burned everything I had including a few books ( biographies of transgenders)and I think of some of the lovely clothes shoes and lingerie I’ve thrown away some of it totally unworn ( how lady like is that !!!) wish I still had some of it .mind you some of it deserved to be thrown away as well !!! Hope I never have to do it  again .xxxx

    • #178083
      Anonymous

      You could buy a bigger house!

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