• Creator
    Topic
  • #669670
    Lauren Mugnaia
    Participant
    Registered On: November 1, 2021
    Topics: 15
    Replies: 349
    Has thanked: 3573 times
    Been thanked: 1866 times

    Hi girls,

    For those of you on here who don’t know, I have transitioned and now live and work as a woman full time. I think we all like, or would like, to ‘pass’ when we are out in public enfemme. Even after transitioning I was feeling quite nervous for awhile when away from my workplace or home.

    Last week, in the process of having to do an address change on my ID cards, I had to have a new picture taken and was asked what my gender is now. I had thought about changing it as the provincial government where I live had recently made it much easier to change the gender designation on your personal ID cards. So I filled out the form and I am now officially a female, and I felt like I was walking on air, finally fulfilling a lifelong dream!

    I had a long coffee with one of my co workers and she asked me if my ears had been burning, as they’d been talking about me, saying good things, she assured, lol.  Evidently, since now actually being called a woman, a change in my total persona and demeanor has become very evident to everybody. She said the way I look, behave, talk, my mannerisms, how I laugh and smile have all become so natural that they’re all amazed. She told me that I had no reason to worry anymore about whether I passed, saying that I am a beautiful woman and nobody seeing me would think anything else. I know my confidence levels had increased, but after hearing what she had to say, they have skyrocketed!

    So, the rather interesting experiences. Hmmm, I’m attracting attention. It would appear that I am definitely passing. While waiting for the bus I’ve had several ladies ask, “Excuse me miss, do you know when the next bus arrives?” That was okay. Men are opening doors for me and letting me on the bus first, that is okay. But this morning, while exchanging buses downtown, several guys came up and asked, “Miss, do you have any spare change?” I said no, and fortunately the bus arrived.  This afternoon, again while waiting for my bus, a fellow sidled up and said, “Sure is a nice breeze on a warm day.” I nodded and said yes. The bus arrived and I got on, he did as well and sat close by. He kept trying to engage me in conversation and I guess I’m just not into that yet.  There was another man on the bus who kept his eyes on me and I tried to avert his stares. As the bus approached the stop before my stop I grabbed the handles of my handbag, he then pulled the cord to get off at my stop. I exited as fast as I could and ran across the street. He was walking on the other side, still watching me and started to cross the street, traffic kept him busy as I made it to the stairs down to our condo and I didn’t see him.

    I know, from reading posts by other sisters on here that some of you enjoy male companionship. I don’t swing that way, have been informed by my lady friends that I am a trans lesbian, and I’m totally fine with that.

    So, passing can be amazingly wonderful, but, as I found, can lead to some unwanted attention and I guess I need to learn how to be careful.

    Hugs girls, I need some nice hugs,

    Ms. Lauren M

Viewing 13 reply threads
  • Author
    Replies
    • #670466
      Tina Que
      Lady
      Registered On: April 14, 2021
      Topics: 58
      Replies: 298
      Has thanked: 1196 times
      Been thanked: 1758 times

      This is a discussion that has come up in my circles lately. Who we identify as or live as is one thing and who we are interested in is another. We are all on our own path and who we identify as or live as has no relation to our interests.

      I have had several men interested on some singles (non-dating) groups I belong to. I don’t like to engage them in conversation as they are operating outside the group situations. These conversations are discouraged in these groups as they can lead to situations out of your control.

    • #670195
      Michelle Byee
      Lady
      Registered On: July 12, 2022
      Topics: 7
      Replies: 35
      Has thanked: 116 times
      Been thanked: 312 times

      Lauren… giving you a big virtual hug from your fellow Canadian friend.

      So since you are passing so well as a woman, congratulations on all of your successes that you mentioned. We (as women) will always get the attraction of other people (men and women) and I think that is very flattering but you do need to be aware and safe.

      I think the best advice (and this was mentioned by Angela earlier), get some advice from some other generic women about how they have dealt with it over their whole lifetime. Since you are so close with your co-workers, you should be able to bring it up in a conversation. I bet you will hear some different stories and reactions and then you can use the best way that works for you.

      Hugs 🤗🤗🤗 and Kisses 💋💋💋
      Michelle

       

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #670042
      Jess Secret
      Lady
      Registered On: February 18, 2021
      Topics: 15
      Replies: 467
      Has thanked: 1185 times
      Been thanked: 1951 times

      Very happy for you Lauren and those are some great experiences, other than the creepy guys. It’s one of the reasons I’m closeted, the only guy who sees me dress is my boyfriend and I pass for him and that’s all I need.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #670033
      Kim Dahlenbergen
      Lady
      Registered On: November 18, 2019
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 197
      Has thanked: 141 times
      Been thanked: 641 times

      A common courtesy, like opening a door or being called miss or ma’am, can be positive. I have been offered a drink on a couple times by men, but honestly I wasn’t sure whether they saw me as an unattached woman or a transwoman. In those situations I try to be polite but decline anything more than a free beverage.

      Oddly enough, I seem to attract more positive attention from women in girl mode than I ever did as a male. I’m not sure what to make of that.

      5 users thanked author for this post.
      • #670048
        Lauren Mugnaia
        Duchess
        Registered On: November 1, 2021
        Topics: 15
        Replies: 349
        Has thanked: 3573 times
        Been thanked: 1866 times

        Hi Kim, you said:

        “I seem to attract more positive attention from women in girl mode than I ever did as a male.”

        This is so true for me, so true. I’m getting ladies at work taking me out for coffee or lunch quite frequently, one of them likes hugs, addresses me as ‘dearest Lauren’ and blows me kisses all the time, at this stage I’m not sure how to respond…

        I have to learn how to respond to these various scenarios, LOL.

        Hugs,

        Ms. Lauren M

        3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #670020
      Ang
      Baroness
      Registered On: December 27, 2016
      Topics: 17
      Replies: 70
      Has thanked: 19 times
      Been thanked: 106 times

      Hi Lauren,

      Yes, sometimes unwanted attention can be very unnerving. I think it is important that you practice the same skills us GG do. Keep aware of your surroundings, make sure others know you are aware of your surroundings (don’t be too much looking at your phone, don’t sit in your car with doors unlocked, etc). Also, if you keep keys on hand remember you can use that as a weapon by having pointy end out in between fingers. The vibe or attitude of thanks but no thanks is also good to learn. I would highly recommend taking one of those protection classes for women too, you never know when you might need it. As a teen I had to physically kick, punch, and shove my way out of a group of overzealous men, you can never be too safe or aware. It was so bad for me that I use to be afraid to even be in a car with a man…. It has taken me a long, long time to be more comfortable with men in public settings and sadly private ones too. I don’t say this to scare you by any means…but more as an ounce of prevention is easier than a pound of cure. Stay safe, Ang

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #669816
      Eileen Bach
      Baroness
      Registered On: February 27, 2021
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 386
      Has thanked: 201 times
      Been thanked: 1545 times

      Congrats on your acceptance at work, Lauren. It must feel so wonderful to become the person you always were meant to be.

      You’ll find that many women might engage in conversation with a total stranger just to have someone to talk with. Innocent conversation with men might just be that, casual conversation. You’ll learn how to converse with women as a sister, or with men with the attitude of ‘hands off’.

      There is something to consider in that your ‘passing’ is still questionable. Some might engage in conversation just to test your responses. Over time, your confidence and mannerisms will be second nature.

      Unfortunately, the unwanted attention from men is quite normal for most women. It’s not always an experience that is meant to be a compliment.

      Eileen

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #669803
      Angela Booth
      Lady
      Registered On: August 1, 2020
      Topics: 9
      Replies: 1150
      Has thanked: 4356 times
      Been thanked: 5144 times

      It seems that you have arrived at the last stop to womanhood Lauren.  Acceptance and some unwanted attention too. I am sure if you talk to the girls at work they will share there experiences of the unwanted attention too. Just be careful and enjoy this new life.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #669784
      Michelle McQueen
      Lady
      Registered On: June 14, 2021
      Topics: 28
      Replies: 1506
      Has thanked: 9742 times
      Been thanked: 7371 times

      Many hugs to you Ms Lauren.

      You know pretty flowers attract bees with stingers so bee careful sweetie.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #669780
      Bianca Everdene
      Lady
      Registered On: April 11, 2017
      Topics: 30
      Replies: 968
      Has thanked: 4140 times
      Been thanked: 4177 times

      Wonderful uplifting post Lauren, so happy for you, thanks for sharing.

      B x

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #669754
      Michelle McQueen
      Lady
      Registered On: June 14, 2021
      Topics: 28
      Replies: 1506
      Has thanked: 9742 times
      Been thanked: 7371 times

      You’re a female now and you have to be aware of your surroundings more so now like any genetic female to be safe from those who would take advantage of you. You should carry mace or a weapon for defense. Stay safe!

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #669752
      Dawn Judson
      Ambassador
      Registered On: November 26, 2017
      Topics: 15
      Replies: 195
      Has thanked: 471 times
      Been thanked: 923 times

      Nice, Lauren. A lot of guys have bought me drinks & come on to me. I’ve been flirted with &, frankly, I love to flirt back, but have never had a problem with “drawing the line”.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
      • #669758
        Lauren Mugnaia
        Duchess
        Registered On: November 1, 2021
        Topics: 15
        Replies: 349
        Has thanked: 3573 times
        Been thanked: 1866 times

        Thanks Dawn, any pointers, tips, or advice? I’m still new at this.  It’s amazing finally being the true person I was born as, but with these situations I was definitely caught off guard.  🙂

        Hugs,

        Ms. Lauren M

        2 users thanked author for this post.
        • #669766
          Dawn Judson
          Ambassador
          Registered On: November 26, 2017
          Topics: 15
          Replies: 195
          Has thanked: 471 times
          Been thanked: 923 times

          I wish I had some “sage” advice, Lauren, but there’s really nothing special that I do other than saying, “I’m not interested, but thanks for the dance/drink/conversation.” Some have gotten a little too touchy, but I just remove their hands from where they’re touching me & they stop. Maybe I’ve just been lucky, but I’ve never had to pull the mace out of my purse.

           

          2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #669744
      Julie Shaw
      Lady
      Registered On: September 3, 2015
      Topics: 18
      Replies: 123
      Has thanked: 596 times
      Been thanked: 754 times

      I sign off my blog with the tag line “Stay Safe And Pretty, Sweeties” — confidence in our femininity CAN translate to SOME men as “come and get me”. So stay safe, Sweetie!

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #669707
      Philippa Parker
      Baroness
      Registered On: March 13, 2018
      Topics: 5
      Replies: 22
      Has thanked: 1 time
      Been thanked: 114 times

      Nice warm hugs from me Lauren.
      You need to get a man red light turned on while out and about.
      A few months ago I had mine on but that did not stop one man who had been staring at me intently getting in his car and following me when I was driving home. As I know the area well and all of its back lanes I did manage to shake him off but still quite scary, at ironically a red light.
      More warm hugs
      Philippa

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #669679
      Саманта
      Managing Ambassador
      Registered On: January 21, 2018
      Topics: 681
      Replies: 1649
      Has thanked: 9621 times
      Been thanked: 5908 times

      big hugs Lauren! 🤗🤗

      guys do some weird stuff sometimes don’t they?  and not good weird either lol.  it’s not a good social climate to act like a weirdo in right now… be vigilant, be safe! ❤

      2 users thanked author for this post.
Viewing 13 reply threads
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Join our mailing list to receive the latest news and updates from Crossdresser Heaven.

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Log in with your credentials

or    

Forgot your details?

Create Account

If you don't see the captcha above please disable ad and tracking blockers and reload the page.