- April 3, 2021 at 4:56 am #473033stephanie plumbParticipantRegistered On: November 17, 2018Topics: 146Replies: 1964Has thanked: 3130 timesBeen thanked: 9035 times
We talk a lot about “passing” ourselves off as a woman, or being “accepted” as being a woman. It’s all about “the woman” ….. but where is the man in this! One of my mantra’s is (I hear a few groans… here she goes again… ) – “hiding in plain sight.” Which is a distraction technique. The logic being that if you make yourself appear as female as possible, then you will be accepted as being female. I mean… if you were a stick-insect you would cling on to a stick , and you wouldn’t be noticed by predators. A stick among sticks. It works.
So I was walking the dog, en-femme, and just letting my mind wander, as I do once I have relaxed. I glanced down at myself, ….. past my splendid boobs with a hint of bounce, to my tan faux-suede skirt, 40 denier opaque’s, and tan ankle-boots. Looking good! Very female ………. which means ….. not male … at all. To all intents and purposes I am the woman people can see. Which means I am not visible as a man. The biological man is here, in this very spot, but no one can see him!
He is the invisible man! Here stands a (relatively) attractive, and very visible woman!
Next time I go out my emphasis will not be to be accepted as female, but to be the invisible man!
theveryvisible , Stephanie P
20 users thanked author for this post.
- April 4, 2021 at 10:23 am #473647Eva KellyDuchessRegistered On: March 1, 2021Topics: 7Replies: 213Has thanked: 2206 timesBeen thanked: 999 times
- April 4, 2021 at 9:26 am #473632Polly StewartLadyRegistered On: January 2, 2021Topics: 10Replies: 881Has thanked: 1236 timesBeen thanked: 2930 times
Ms Plumb… As usual an interesting thread and you thread the issue through the eye very well indeed.
The only time I’m reminded of the invisible man is in the early morning reflection in the mirror proving I’m not a vampire. The nude person looks like someone I know but can’t place anymore. After I complete my toilette and the clothes are arranged, wig one and morning makeup all good to go Polly is up and ready for the day.
I just don’t think about anything other than what Polly needs to do and what she is feeling. I’m out and about, working on stuff, shopping, doing housework even home maintenance… as Polly.
However, I do admit to times when I look in the mirror and think how unlovely i look and why did I have to be born with a face like mine? Then the male might surface for some seconds but the retreat into the shadows. I am Polly now!
- April 3, 2021 at 1:54 pm #473246Sarah Du HessisseLadyRegistered On: September 16, 2020Topics: 21Replies: 436Has thanked: 2305 timesBeen thanked: 1619 times
Hi Stephanie good posting you clearly dress for the environment that you are entering, which makes a lot of sense. Dressing that way you obviously just blend in, I sometimes see girls like us who don’t dress for the situation they are in. A lot girls seem to over dress for the situation.
- April 3, 2021 at 12:26 pm #473202Layla JonesLadyRegistered On: June 7, 2020Topics: 0Replies: 38Has thanked: 325 timesBeen thanked: 144 times
- April 3, 2021 at 10:25 am #473166KristaDuchessRegistered On: January 24, 2017Topics: 8Replies: 536Has thanked: 1303 timesBeen thanked: 2324 times
Hi Stephanie, I first read your post over an hour ago. I didn’t want to give it a quick response as it quite the deep topic. So I made my wife some hard boiled eggs so they are ready when she wakes up. Then I went on a long walk to think about your topic, oh, and rescue a lost dog. While walking I came upon a cute puppy wearing a collar but no leash and no owner anywhere in sight. So I stopped and talked to him, gave him a few pets on the head, and then heard someone yelling “Frosty” (so called I hope because the pup likes the cold weather as opposed to having a nasty attitude). I figured it was the owner and yelled back “Your puppy is over here”. They came running up and I’ve done my good deed for the day.
So back to your topic. I understand your point and feel it is very valid when it comes to much of the population as they like putting things/people they see into nice neat boxes. Makes it easy for them to understand. For me, it is not about putting myself in a “man” or “woman” box. I’m just Krista out for a walk. And I’m not invisible to most. People I meet on my walk can put me into a box if they like, I imagine there are those that do. And as you say, I imagine there are those people who are so focused on their own self (and/or dog), that they barely notice me. Not totally invisible; just a shadow of a person going by. But then there are those wonderful people who smile, say hello, and look completely non-judgmental as we pass each other. And I’m lucky that I live in a community where there are lots of those friendly, smiling people out and about on a sunny but a bit nippy “spring” morning.
Thank you for your thought provoking topic Stephanie. I love that you challenge our brain cells. It is a nice way to spend some relaxing time while sipping my tea after my walk. All the Very Best, Hope you have a lovely Easter tomorrow. Hugs, Krista.
- April 3, 2021 at 8:47 am #473128Rozalyne RichardsLadyRegistered On: March 10, 2018Topics: 0Replies: 540Has thanked: 976 timesBeen thanked: 1824 times
Hi Stephanie I’m the other way round, here is a very visible man and the woman inside is very invisible, it’s been ages since she last made an appearance, sometimes i think am i only dreaming about Her is she a figment of my imagination, but then i come on to CDH and realise that she is my other half, I’m sure it won’t be long then she can throw off her drab man clothes and appear like a butterfly spreading it’s wings xxxxx
Hugs Rozalyne x
- April 3, 2021 at 12:07 pm #473198Beth GreenLadyRegistered On: February 24, 2021Topics: 12Replies: 179Has thanked: 629 timesBeen thanked: 900 times
- April 3, 2021 at 9:50 am #473162Grace ScarlettBaroness - AnnualRegistered On: February 16, 2021Topics: 54Replies: 1116Has thanked: 3881 timesBeen thanked: 5794 times
I didn’t realise…
you come on here and you are always so lovely, happy and positive…nobody would guess…
If you get to dress for longer…I can’t imagine the result….it would be like getting attacked by…..a rainbow!!!!….haha
Love you girl.xx
- April 3, 2021 at 6:27 am #473064Regine RichPrincessRegistered On: October 9, 2020Topics: 28Replies: 789Has thanked: 7810 timesBeen thanked: 3473 times
What a great posting, Stephanie.
I myself have that problem of seeing the man within, but Im told he dissapears, once I dress and do my makeup. Now, I just have to get my brain to accept that, lol
- April 3, 2021 at 6:27 am #473063Grace ScarlettBaroness - AnnualRegistered On: February 16, 2021Topics: 54Replies: 1116Has thanked: 3881 timesBeen thanked: 5794 times
it’s a bit like my flat 90 % of the time…..there ARE the odd signs that a man has been here…but I expect even CSI would have a job proving it….
Just a few things that couldn’t possibly be attributed to the woman that lives here….the odd scent of passed wind, far too many empty wine bottles, a fat man’s chocolate supply, (couldn’t be hers…too slim ) and a basic man’s wardrobe…..maybe a chap visits weekends…..yep, he’s pretty invisible…
- April 3, 2021 at 5:58 am #473053Clara CrossLadyRegistered On: December 7, 2020Topics: 9Replies: 230Has thanked: 658 timesBeen thanked: 1058 times
No groans here Steph.
I know you do a wonderful job of hiding in plain sight but I wonder about 2poos. Does s/he ever “give you away”? I haven’t been out locally but wonder about that. As the dog walker in the family, I’d love to go enfemme in my own neighborhood with the pups. I agree, doing ordinary things, i.e. shopping, biking, dog walking is a great way to hide in plain sight. But it occurs to me that while I might not be recognized, the dogs probably would. And I can’t get them to keep their wigs, skirts and blouses on so I know they’d be noticed. Any thoughts?
Disguised as a stick,
- April 3, 2021 at 7:44 am #473100stephanie plumbBaroness - AnnualRegistered On: November 17, 2018Topics: 146Replies: 1964Has thanked: 3130 timesBeen thanked: 9035 times
Hi Clara, Yes I have considered that possibility. It’s a risk I accept. But there are some things that mitigate the risk:-
1. She is a Cockapoo of a very common colour, and there are lots and lots of those around here.
2. The heath/woods are 3 miles away and the local dog-walkers where I live do not tend to go there regularly, they are spoilt for choice closer to home.
3. Locally – within 2 minutes walk there are 2 large open sites/woods that the locals frequent daily, and a new “forest” within walking distance, and a pedestrian “lane” that connects them and a number of footpaths all together. We live right on the edge of town adjacent to the open countryside.
4. I keep a weather eye open for anyone I recognise. I have found it quite easy to pick out someone I know even at 400 yards or more.
5. I know the area as intimately as I know my intimates! I know every trail/path/hiding place/escape route/vantage point/bush and tree. I can disappear in seconds. She is off lead but sticks fairly close by – separation anxiety is a known Cockapoo trait – if I move off she always follows.
6. I assume they might think they recognise the dog, but they wouldn’t associate her with a woman they don’t know! I mostly rely on this to keep from being made.
7. People are generally not interested in me walking my dog. They are either walking their own dog(s) – and so keeping an eye on them, jogging, cycling, or horse riding, and minding their own business.
8. I mostly go out earlyish – around 08:00 – and there are less people around (the locals are walking doggie closer to home before work or the school run etc.)
My next door neighbour out on his bike shot past us once and didn’t make us. I am quite happy that the risk is very small, and the benefits far outweigh this very small risk.
I guess if you have two or more dogs you are more conspicuous.
Just another woman walking her dog, Stephanie.
- April 3, 2021 at 2:55 pm #473256Clara CrossLadyRegistered On: December 7, 2020Topics: 9Replies: 230Has thanked: 658 timesBeen thanked: 1058 times
I don’t know if you play Steph, but I have to believe you would be a formidable chess player. Always at least two moves ahead of the game.
Not sure if you have “dog parks” in the U.K. as we do here. Fenced grounds specifically for running the dogs off leash. Very popular in these parts. I think it would be quite possible to employ some of your stealth tactics there. I’ll let you know how it goes.
Best to you and The Poo
- April 3, 2021 at 6:08 am #473058Baroness - AnnualRegistered On: February 16, 2021Topics: 54Replies: 1116Has thanked: 3881 timesBeen thanked: 5794 times
- April 3, 2021 at 5:09 am #473036Diana MorganLadyRegistered On: February 22, 2021Topics: 7Replies: 586Has thanked: 4217 timesBeen thanked: 1795 times
- April 3, 2021 at 5:30 am #473042Baroness - AnnualRegistered On: November 17, 2018Topics: 146Replies: 1964Has thanked: 3130 timesBeen thanked: 9035 times
Thanks Diana. I certainly don’t do bland. This summer I’m into reds, pinks and purples. I may even (shock horror) get a pair of cerise pink jeggings. And I have my eye on a yellow summery, very feminine dress with a ruched bodice and puffy sleeves. Look good in the woods. People might think I am a fairy!
I’m convinced – it would make a great Countryfile!
- April 3, 2021 at 12:29 pm #473203LadyRegistered On: February 24, 2021Topics: 12Replies: 179Has thanked: 629 timesBeen thanked: 900 times
I’m waiting for my yellow summer dress right now. Got a message that it is delayed in transit, probably stuck in the Suez canal. The fashionistas say yellow is not for fair skin but it’s so pretty I’m doing it anyway. They’ve been wrong before. They said a turtleneck would hide an ageing neck, UGH! It made me look shorter, with my head directly attached to my shoulders, plus it hid my cleavage. Hey, I’m not wearing forms and a lacy bra to create a drink shelf!
Oh well, let’s hope the ships can become speedboats now.
- April 3, 2021 at 6:14 am #473059Baroness - AnnualRegistered On: February 16, 2021Topics: 54Replies: 1116Has thanked: 3881 timesBeen thanked: 5794 times
“I have my eye on a yellow summery, very feminine dress wIith a ruched bodice and puffy sleeves. “……
I wouldn’t go out dressed like that, you are asking to be mugged….
by me !!
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