Tagged: Last Great Purge.
- This topic has 34 replies, 20 voices, and was last updated 4 years ago by Stephanie Flowers.
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- August 22, 2019 at 6:33 am #210987Anonymous
Hi all. For those of us who are not completely out, what happens when we meet our Maker? Someone will be in for quite a revelation when they go through our things. It will not matter to us and in the great scheme of things it won’t matter at all but, OMG look what I found, is not the inheritance I would like to leave my loved ones. Should we stipulate, lay me out enfemme, in the perfect dress to declare, hello world, I’m finally out!
Your invaluable advice is welcomed. - August 22, 2019 at 6:55 am #210989Anonymous
Haha!
That’s one reason I told all to my wife.
I doubt very much that my wish to be laid out in a beautiful sparkling evening dress, with heels, wig and forms would be respected though.
I think she’d much rather have a different memory.
Sigh!
Love Laura
- August 22, 2019 at 7:07 am #210992
I have thought of this and it lead to a purge a few years ago. That worked well, I have more now than before, along with my new online presence. One thing I have been thinking about is placing a letter to my family with my stash explaining everything. Coming out before would probably be best but the consequences would not be good. So I am considering a letter.
- August 22, 2019 at 7:12 am #210994Anonymous
Thought about that too hon. Good idea.
- August 22, 2019 at 7:16 am #210995Anonymous
You never know but our “Maker” might be a member of CDH!
- August 22, 2019 at 12:43 pm #211205
I know she is!
- August 22, 2019 at 12:52 pm #211207Anonymous
OMG! Have you met her?
- August 22, 2019 at 12:52 pm #211208Anonymous
Zeus was known to take on many forms to achieve his goals and satisfy his desires. I have got the right maker haven’t I.
- August 22, 2019 at 12:55 pm #211209Anonymous
Only if you’re from Lancashire!
- August 22, 2019 at 1:15 pm #211212Anonymous
Steady or you will be crossing the Styx to Hades and be shackled to Boris for eternity.
- August 22, 2019 at 1:20 pm #211213Anonymous
“Ferry across the Mersey”!
- August 22, 2019 at 1:23 pm #211215Anonymous
That’s worse. Anyway your taking over another thread, time for us to shut up.
- August 22, 2019 at 8:14 am #211028
Hi Mina,
This has got me thinking, maybe it is time to come out of the closet given I have told my son that when I am old and decrepit I am going to live with him so he can care for me. I could live like a modern day Miss Havisham complaining about everything whilst wearing an old wedding dress.
Jessica x.
- August 22, 2019 at 8:57 am #211046
Mina I’m in agreement with Melissa on this. I could see putting a note in my panty drawer. Provided I’m not fully out or found out by then.
- August 22, 2019 at 10:36 am #211118Anonymous
Autumn, Great answer. Wish I had a panty drawer.
- August 22, 2019 at 9:26 am #211051
Almost all people close to me are aware I am transgender and do dress as a woman at times. However I think my eldest son is the only one possibly aware of the full extent of it. He knows I would like to be laid to rest in the very first dress I sew myself. If he and his brothers can persuade my wife to allow that is yet to see, but won’t really matter to me when the day comes.
- August 22, 2019 at 11:06 am #211128
Well my gf knows, and my children know in part for this very reason. So I guess I’ve ruined the surprise for them lol.
As to what I like to be laid out in…..cremation without viewings or services, so likely au naturel.
- August 22, 2019 at 1:00 pm #211210Anonymous
All you girls are the best. Thanks soo much for responding.
- August 22, 2019 at 1:46 pm #211219
great topic and so many great replies! 🙂
honestly, i think about this topic often as i am not out to anyone. this actually keeps me from buying many things i would like to buy (dresses, shoes, etc).
as a result, my collection is kept to a minimum, rather than exploding to satisfy the pink fog!
although i am single and live alone, i do have family and i sometimes worry- – how can i hide all this stuff?
- August 22, 2019 at 2:36 pm #211232
If I die, I’m dead. I wouldn’t be around to get embarrassed.
- August 22, 2019 at 10:28 pm #211348
This has been a gnawing fear of mine long before I joined CDH. It’s on my mind each night as “I lay me down to sleep.” In fact, I commented about this very subject in the topic “Til Death Do We Part” in the Forum of the “Over 50” group a short time after I joined CDH.
Although I’m no believer in the afterlife, even in death the shame would be transcendent as my survivors sift through my femme belongings in shock and awe, repeating “Oh, my God!” at each new revelation.
I am sorry that I can offer no advice in the matter, as I still haven’t figured it out for myself. But, at 72½, I’d better get a move on!
- August 22, 2019 at 10:52 pm #211358
No plans to be displayed or laid out, so I really don’t care what I’m wearing. But photo slideshows are the thing at funerals these days, and I’ve made it clear to my family that Rachel isn’t to be forgotten. I doubt she will be – she’s been an important and enjoyable part of all of our lives for too long (and frankly has a far better set of pictures than my default guy mode has 😀 ) for anyone to ignore her.
- August 22, 2019 at 10:56 pm #211359
Obviously my wardrobe is there for all to see already, but I suspect that a few ‘oddities’ or surprises may be lurking at the back of a drawer or cupboard. Even I find stuff from time to time I forgotten I’d bought and think ‘WTF?’
- August 23, 2019 at 6:05 am #211440
Well, I’ve been on my mom’s cremation plan since she got it, so that’s been taken care of. But if I were to be buried, I would love to be shown en femme, perfect makeup, cutest dress and my sexiest heels.
- August 23, 2019 at 6:13 am #211442Anonymous
A lot of famous people have died this year, I don’t feel too well myself. Gilly
- August 28, 2019 at 7:18 am #214138
Gilly I hope you feel better !
- August 26, 2019 at 6:51 am #213010
I’ve thought about this and my thought was, what does it matter at that point?
- August 26, 2019 at 7:38 am #213039
If anything my wife will not be too surprised when she finds things. She may be surprised by finding things in various locations.
- August 26, 2019 at 9:45 am #213073Anonymous
I have to go with some of the other girls here and say, who cares I will be dead. If my cache of hidden female attire is found by my wife I doubt very much that she will be surprised, although I am still closeted I have dropped enough hints. Like today, she is returning from visiting our daughter for the last ten days, she called today from the airport and I informed her that I had cleaned the house from top to bottom. Her reply, “aren’t you just the best little house maid” , my reply “ yes indeed I think I need a maids uniform to wear while I do my housework”. I think it may happen lol.
- August 26, 2019 at 11:07 am #213112Anonymous
Kathy Ten days to be you. Too cool. Yes I’m the same way, do enjoy the house work and take pride in it. Hopefully our SO’s will appreciate it. P. S. get a real housekeeping uniform/dress vs a soo short French maid outfit. TNKS for your post. HUGS Mina
- August 26, 2019 at 2:13 pm #213222Anonymous
Given my age and past medical history, I have given the subject some recent thought. My conclusion: My wife and elder daughter both know that I dress, are not really OK with it, and can be counted on to promptly donate everything to Goodwill. And I have already asked to be buried in uniform, with military honors, so that issue is also settled.
- August 28, 2019 at 6:19 am #214091Anonymous
May I recommend a book by Margareta Magnusson: The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Free Yourself and Your Family from a Lifetime of Clutter. Do try and finish it before you “pop your clogs”! Gilly.
- August 28, 2019 at 8:50 am #214185
My dressing is something my wife has been quite supportive with and she knows basically what I have. No one else knows and likely won’t but if and when that time comes for me my wife has told me adamantly that every single piece of Stephanie will be removed. Her reasons are to keep this a secret and I totally agree. She promises to donate everything possible to thrift stores so others can benefit. But!!! if I am to unfortunately lose my wife it will definitely become a major surprise for many of in my family. It would certainly be a shock but I’m sure they always were aware that something was going on. My wife mentions this every so offern as my daughters are always drilling her about what dad’s up to, questions of why the long hair, the body shaving dada dada dada and soon pierced ears. That in itself I think will drive Curiosities to its limits. I personally not worry, after all I’ll won’t be here but again known my daughters and their strong abilities for rational thinking I’m sure everything will be fine. I know they’ll be shaking their heads , giggling and smiling ear to ear and looking at each other repeating ” OMG!!!! wow!!!!!
Stephanie 🌹
- This reply was modified 4 years ago by Stephanie Flowers.
- August 22, 2019 at 11:41 am #211160Anonymous
The medical school could, perhaps, be in for a bit of a shock!
- August 22, 2019 at 1:47 pm #211220Anonymous
What if the universe is pantheistic?
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