There is help, kindness, and acceptance…

[Darcy Grigsby]

That’s right there is help, kindness, and acceptance in the world and it exists beyond this digital island of safety and it exists beyond the walls of your home. You just need to have that little bit of courage to seek it out.

Here is one example… Many Macy’s locations have personal stylists on staff and you can schedule an appointment with them and give them an idea of what style or items you are looking for. They will then fill a private dressing room just for your appointment. I did this just last week and this is how it went. I emailed Melissa and told her that I was interested in setting up an appointment, but I was very upfront with her that I was a crossdresser and asked if she would be comfortable with helping me. I always try to give people an option of declining help if they are uncomfortable. It’s polite and it ensures that I get the respect I am worthy of. She had no problem at all and was delighted to help. We went back and forth a few times over email discussing style and what I was looking for. On the day of my appointment, I dressed androgynously in female jeans and sweater. I also wore bra/panty along with my forms. That was a first wearing those clothes while otherwise presenting as male. I carried a bag with some heels to see how things would look. She met me and took me back to the dressing room which was stocked with all sorts of options! Once I was settled, she excused herself to take a quick call while I began trying on a dress. When I had it just over my butt she knocked and asked if she could come back in. Keep in mind I was wearing lace bra and panties and nobody has ever seen me in just underwear and forms before so I was a little stunned for a moment. I eventually said, “if you are comfortable with that, then I’m okay with it”. And with that she came in and zero reaction was made at my partially clothed form. I pulled the dress up the rest of the way and she helped zip me up. From there she stayed and chatted while I dressed and undressed many times over. No big deal for her and no big deal for me. Ultimately I settled on a Calvin Klein dress and a couple of tops. She had a register back in this private area so no need to head out to the floor. A very pleasurable experience to say the least. In the next post I will share an email exchange I had with the stylist afterwards.

[Darcy Grigsby]

Good morning Megan,

 

I’m a few days late, but thank you for a very enjoyable shopping experience. I really had a fantastic time and I loved the selection you picked out. So many gorgeous options!

 

I will say you caught me off guard a little when you asked to join me in the dressing room. I am pretty comfortable with my dressing but I always try to be respectful and sensitive to those around me who may not be. So to have someone see me in that setting of dress and undress was a new experience as those who have seen Darcy it has only been when I have been fully dressed. That said it was very nice having you in there to critique or make selections. More importantly I felt extremely validated, seen, and accepted. Standing in just bra and panty is putting crossdressing/trans at the most basic level and it didn’t seem to phase you, and this reaction or rather non-reaction made me feel ecstatic about who I am.

 

Thank you. I don’t get the opportunity often to feel that sense of acceptance so it was very special for me.

 

I can’t wait to wear my new clothes and I wish I could have been able to buy it all!

 

Have a great day and even better holiday season,

Darcy

 

Hey Darcy,

I am so sorry for the late response .I am trying to wrap up my last-minute holiday appointments before I head out of town this week. But I want to say thank you so much for allowing me to share that intimate space with you. I do that with all of my clients and I saw you no different than the women that I work with on a day-to-day basis. You have definitely shined a new light on the crossdressing/trans world for me and I want to say thank you for that. I wish you the best on your journey and please let me know if I can help you in anyway! xoxo

Megan

[Darcy Grigsby]

In short, treat others with respect and you will often get it in return ☺️

[Terri]

Great post Darcy. I have been going out enfemme a long time. Macys is one of my favorite stores. I have found them to be very friendly to our community. I really dont care if I get read. I love going out and being myself.
Yours Terri

[Fiona Black]

That is a great story Darcy. Thanks for posting it.

[Anonymous]

Darcy
Lovely,warm heartfelt story and letters. Such a beautiful experience and memory for you. Everything you said was spot on. Respect and love is earned.
Merry Christmas
Luvs Hugs

[Cassie Jayson]

Darcy, I hope many retail stores will realize that helping the CD/trans community is one way to increase sales and save their business. We on our part need to be respectful and be a good representative of the trans community.
Good luck Darcy
Cassie

[Lara Muir]

Darcy,

Thank you so much for sharing this experience! How wonderful to be accepted at that level! What a professional sales associate, and wonderful human Megan is!

💕Lara

[Lauren Mugnaia]

Hi girls,

Yes, if you go out with confidence in who you are, and are straight forward about being either a CD or trans, there is help, kindness, and acceptance. Here are some personal experiences I’ve had recently.
I am a trans woman and have transitioned, living as a woman. In each case I was originally open with people about being transgender and so far no one has ever responded negatively.

I have developed a close friendship with my MAC girls at my favorite MAC store. We compare how we’ve done our eyes each time I show up, show off our nails, they love to give me pointers, and I’ve sat on the high stool where they do makeovers having them test my skintone for the best foundation match. They’ve applied lip colors and eye makeup. We always have a hug time before I leave.

I have a favorite lingerie store where I went for my first bra fitting, they didn’t even blink when I asked them about it. I now go in as Lauren to pick up bras, camisoles, chemises and other items.

Courtesy of a horrid dentist I inherited when I married my first wife, and being an older gal, I have a complete upper denture. I’m an artist and have many close friends who are as well, I came out to all of them about being transgender and there wasn’t a surprised person in the group – I’ve never been good at hiding who I really am. My denturist, Tracy, is friends with these people as well as a close friend to me, so she found out I had transitioned. I received a call from her saying: “Hi Lauren, I understand there’s been a few changes since I last saw you, why don’t you come in and we can discuss giving you a new beautiful smile!”
I saw her last week and was there today. She was literally blown away at how I now look as a trans woman. As we were talking, she showed me that there are actual differences between male and female teeth and how women’s smiles look different. She’s going to give me a new, beautiful feminine smile with brighter teeth, and wants me to bring in my favorite lipsticks to see the best shades for the new teeth.

So ladies, stand tall, go in with conviction, like you own the place, believing in yourself and exuding confidence. Tell them who you are and what they can help you with, have fun and watch the magic happen!

Hugs girls,

Ms. Lauren M

[Julie Shaw]

What a delicious and delightful experience! I’m so glad it was pleasant for you, Sweetie.  My negative side would only look for the potential for disaster that might come. You have encouraged me to set up an appointment, too.

[Deborah Sullivan]

I am proud of the manner and way you conducted yourself as well Darcy. Calling ahead and handling the whole experience like a professional person. This gives all of us girls here a smile

[J J]

The more I am out en femme, the more acceptance I feel. Not just shopping, but from the public in general. I live in a pretty liberal part of a pretty liberal state, but even shopping Little Rock, Arkansas or Oklahoma City I felt comfortable in shopping malls and stores.

No doubt there are still cretins out there who want to make other’s life as miserable as theirs, but it only works if we let them. I just hold my head high and go about my business just as everybody else is, I just happen to dress differently then the “norm”.

Of course I have not always had such confidence, but it was mostly shopping and good SA interactions that really helped.  While I would never intentional expose myself to an SA scantily clad, it was my first bra fitting that changed all that. The SA helped me in and out of bras, and did the necessary adjustments, just as she would do with any customer (with permission, of course.) They have a job to do, and we are just customers in need of clothing.

[Jess Secret]

That’s a wonderful story Darcy!

[Author]

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