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Crossdressing popped back into my life just before Covid and did so after a very long hiatus. The last time crossdressing was active in my life was during my first marriage. It receded and left my life before that marriage ended in divorce. It was a secret then as it is now and played no part in that marriage falling apart. I thought I had left crossdressing behind as it hadn’t popped into my mind and the desire had long gone away. Therefore when I met my current wife I never brought it up nor did I think I would have to.
I’m now in my 10th year of marriage with my second wife and crossdressing is fully present in my life. My life is much more challenging and stressful than it has ever been before and the dressing has become an escape that provides me a great deal of calm and stress relief in my life. However, the process of keeping it a secret and wanting to explore more aspects of it is causing me stress. Truly a catch-22…..
I dont really know where I was going with all this, but wanted a break from work and wanted to “talk”. Thanks for listening…..
Hi Darcy
Its a real double edged sword and no easy answer, other than to say that you are no alone and many on here are in the same situation
Take time and be sensible, be honest and make compromises. Only you can make the hard choices as you know the individuals involved.
We are always here to listen and offer our advice, so remember you have friends here
hugs Dawn x
Hello Darcy please keep talking to us, their are lots of girls like us in the same situation. Your right it can be very stressful especially if dressing isn’t happening much or at all.
Love Sarah xx
Darcy,
Would love to meet with you in person sometime to talk about this and other CD related items. I am glad you joined the lunch group I started.
I live in Marietta, Georgia, and I believe we are probably not too far apart.
Feel free to private message me anytime.
Hi Darcy,
With rare exception, we have all been where you are today…and we all got through it.
My own Dressing halted when I left high school, and didn’t return until after 50 years of marriage. At first, it was just something I wanted to try; then it became something I needed to do; and now, it’s who I really am. I am blessed with a wife who at first was willing to tolerate this new part of me (within limits), and has grown to fully accept Bettylou as a girlfriend. Please find a way to share your secret with your wife; you may or may not be as fortunate as I was, but you will be able grow as Darcy and relieve the pent-up stress.Hugs,
BettylouHi Darcy. I’m a life long cd with some gaps when life got in the way. The urge never really left me but I went about 10 years in my twenties and early thirties.(getting married, and raising a family doesn’t lend itself to introspection) As life has calmed the need to dress has become stronger. Leading me to be honest with the two most important people in my life.
First is myself.
Years of confusion and denial didn’t make my need to dress go away. I’ve come to realize hiding from it doesn’t work, using substances doesn’t work it’s something that is a part of me. Being honest to myself about it is the only way forward.
Secondly is coming clean to my wife.
It took me months to tell her, trying to find the right moment and then getting cold feet. It was tearing me up. The stress of hiding my “hobby” was killing me. Not to mention our relationship. After finally having the “talk” the weight of the world had been lifted. She isn’t overly supportive but her knowledge of it has helped my mental state immeasurably and seemingly hers. We have an understanding of where we stand as a couple. My dressing is still mostly closeted but at least I don’t toss and turn worrying about her finding my stash of “lady things” and that’s at least a far more comfortable place to be. Good luckHi Darcy
This is a situations that we have all found ourselves in, to tell or not to tell your wife is something only you know the answer to. Yes you might think it is a big gamble to take however telling your wife will be a much easier conversation than if she walks in and finds you all dressed up as Darcy , or finds some clothing you have left out by mistake.
In my own experience when I told wife 1 she was not very happy didn’t tolerate me dressing and when I did it was at a time when it suited her and the children where out of the house. When we divorced and I met wife 2, after not dressing for a while the urge to wear women’s clothing hit me like a freight train, and I knew again I had to be honest with her so I told her and to say she understood my needs and desires was an understatement and she fully supports me when I am dressed as Samantha.
She told me I am still the same person who does all the decorating, fixes the cars and helps out doing DIY in our children’s homes and the fact that I dress as a woman is just a part of me.
Hope things go well for you if you decide to tell your wife.
Samantha x
Hi Darcy,
I understand your delima to some degree.
My wife knows and was supportive but now is just tolerant.
To the point there is no intimacy.
I really hate that as I had a really great marriage.
However we are still together because we still love each other very much.
I feel guilty but in the end you have to be true to who you are.
I hope you can work it out, having a secret like that has to be tough.
Hugs Patty
In my personal experience wives value honesty and the sooner the better. It seems like it would be best to have the talk with your wife and explain that cd was not on your mind when you married her. You know your wife by now so only you can decide if you should share this with her. Good luck whatever you decide😊💕
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