• This topic has 23 replies, 20 voices, and was last updated 5 years ago by Anonymous.
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    • #126739

      Is it weird to just me or everyone else that when I’m fully dressed as a female I find myself somewhat sexually aroused by watching explicit movies. I sometimes get the urge to look at myself as being a natural female and not a transgender woman when I’m watching these movies and my mind begins to race and I have often wondered and caught myself thank you and wishing that I had a man feeling on me like in those movies. However when I’m in my birth mode which is male I am totally 100% attracted to females and females only. What is it that when I’m dressed up that I feel the urge to be with a man and not a female. Does this make me any different or is just just a phase?

    • #126741

      Hi Samantha,

      No this is not Weird. This is just your Experience of this journey. Read through some of the Forums and you will see similar feelings. When we are dressed We all have different thoughts and feelings. It is to be Expected. Try to just enjoy the journey moment to moment.

      Amanda

    • #126757
      Anonymous

      I agree with Amanda.

      And in any case, who here is not involved in some behavior which could be judged as weird by other people?

      Having said that, just like we should not pass judgement on others, that doesn’t mean that everybody has gone or will go through the same phase (to call it something).

      Like with everything, it will be up to you to decide how you will deal with those feelings. If you allow them to control your life or if you are able to decide if they are part of something different, depends on you and you only. Some others here may be able to share their own experiences, and maybe that will help you in your journey.

      Gaby

    • #126830

      This is me completely.  When I’m dressed I want a man.  I feel myself a woman.  As a man I’m attracted to women.  In my new world, I find myself as a man looking at and being attracted to a woman, and also wanting to wear what she might be wearing.  Yoga pants for example.  It’s so attractive on a woman and I want to slip into a pair when I get home.

    • #126868
      Ashley Parker
      Duchess

      I’m exactly the same way.

      For me, I knew I wasn’t gay because I was very very very attracted to females. But now that I’m older and Ashley has grown stronger I find myself fantasizing about being a ‘real’ woman in very traditional ways. I sometimes fantasize being a bride, pregnant etc. And sexually I have started to fantasize being seduced by a hot young guy (even tho when I am not dressed men gross me out). I’m glad you posted this because part of the difficulty is feeling sooo alone and like I’m some kind of freak and nobody could ever love or accept me.

      Anyhow, just know you are not alone. I think lots of ‘us’ feel like this.
      xo
      Ashley

      • #126873

        Ashley Parker, I have know for years that I’m a woman trapped in a male body. When I dress, I feel like a woman and my mind instantly wants to fantasize about being with a man and having his hands explore my body. There are times that I’ve found myself looking online at certain “toys” because I feel im all woman. I fantasize what ot would be like to be intimate with a man even though when I’m in birth mode, I’m grossed out by men.

    • #126888
      Anonymous

      Hi Sam,  to me you are not weird. I am exactly the same as you describe yourself. I live as a 100% man in every way, but when I go en femme I am a woman and love the exiting exotic way I feel by being dressed. It is absolutely a very private sexual thing. You are right, erotic entertainment along with being en femme heighten the experience, I feel it too. When I am dressed, I want a man’s hands and fingers on me but I am certainly not gay in any sense. Great to hear there are others who are into CD for the private arousal too. It is what it is and I feel no conflict whatsoever.

      Katie Turn adds another thought in her letter on this that I can identify with: looking forward to wearing clothes you can pass in, like yoga pants. While I will never pass as a woman out in public, dressing in passable yoga pants and covered-up bra and falsies, I can go in public passing for a man but dressed en femme, I really enjoy the rush. Funny, the more I do it, the more I am searching not only for opportunities but for a more passable/extensive female wardrobe.

      Love, Alexis

    • #127057
      Janine
      Lady

      Hi Sam
      Just read your post about if it’s weird or not to have the feelings you have when you are dressed en.femme
      My answer is no its not weird at all.
      The reason I say that is because it’s when you present yourself as a woman you should think like a woman and women like to be noticed by men
      I know from personal experience that’s the way I feel when I present myself as a female.
      I dress en.femme to be noticed by men and I enjoy being noticed and hit on
      Sometimes I get hit on by women and I don’t think that’s weird either
      I enjoy the attention that I get when I’m dressed en.femme
      It makes me know that it’s been worth everything I’ve done so that I can pass
      as a woman
      So Sam. Don’t think it’s weird to feel the way you feel. You aren’t alone in feeling this way
      From someone who knows
      Janine

    • #127284

      I guess we are all wierd since I’m more or less the same here.  Even when dressed I am not attracted to guys at all and find myself looking at women’s styles even more.  But I do fantasize about the whole ritual; flirting, first touch, first kiss, yada yada yada

    • #127291
      Anonymous

      I am a gay man and already get turned on by men. I haven’t cross dressed yet, but I’ve been imagining the way I’ll look, move and act in order to gain the attention of men. I also imagine the moves I’ll be making when about to engage sexually with a guy, and the fantsy has opened a whole new level of arousal within me.

    • #127312

      Whatever floats your boat Samantha, no it is not weird.

      My only time out in company en femme was a CDH GNO at a LBGT club. I am not L, G, B or T, just the venue that was picked due to the accepting atmosphere. A woman kept making eye contact across the dance floor, but I was too self conscious to approach. I did wonder if she was just curious or repulsed at seeing a cross dresser, or just saw me as a woman, being an LGBT club. I also admit I did wonder what it would have been like if we had hooked up.

      Maybe I am a lesbian in a male body ! Is that a thing ? 😂

      love

      Bianca

    • #127422

      Hi Samantha!  I am not certain whether or not it is weird….certain make one feel odd. Maybe it’s the hormones we take or perhaps deep in the genetic strands we are bi. I know sometimes I feel the same way…..as a male….no gay thoughts when, en femme, sometimes I do feel like tying on a man….have never done so but in my imagination. Guess it is kind of the ultimate goal of a cross dresser…to feel what only a real girl experiences. It is a subject I have never brought up on Transgender Heaven. Physically, I don’t think they can fully experience it either…I don’t know.

      Do what you do….it is your business and no-one elses.

      Hugs…..

      Dame Veronica

    • #129420

      Hi Samantha, for me

      Not weird. “Getting into character” can be very exciting. I think, like many of the girls here that since starting this journey, alot of our mental perceptions have evolved with us. Everybody wants to be noticed and even ‘appreciated’ to some degree. Quoting….If it feels good, Do it.

    • #129697
      karley delaware
      Baroness - Annual

      Not weird.  How’s this for weird. When infemme. I desire the company of a man. I chose my male side for a date.  We talk, and have a sandwich and coffee,listening to music. Then male side gets a little fresh. We make out . MY male and femme sides change back and forth with increasing frequency to a point I  cannot tell what side ibam on. In the end I am satisfied both as man and   woman.

    • #130078
      Becka
      Lady

      Hi Samantha,

      Completely natural.

      I love women and love sex with women (my SO that is, although we have not had sex in months now, different story!).

      But I’m aroused when I’m dressed, and have fantasized many times and thought of, being the “woman” in a sexual encounter with a man.  I mean full all, no holds barred.

      does that answer your question?

      🙂

      Love and kisses!

      R

    • #130086
      Janine
      Lady

      Yes Amanda
      I agree with you.
      When I am dressed en.femme I tend to think like I’m a female more than a male
      I enjoy the feeling of being a female if it’s only for while I’m dressed en.femme.
      I like you enjoy the journey and always will
      Thank you for saying that
      There’s a lot of truth in what you said

    • #136215
      Anonymous

      When en femme I like the female company of my wife. Her sis is aware of my dressing also. I get so excited in their company!

    • #136249
      Becka
      Lady

      Not weird!

      I’m aroused just by the dressing itself!  I feel so good when doing so!  For me fixing the strap on my cammie as it falls off my shoulder, or slipping on a pair of pumps, or putting on that pair of hose or silky panties, all gets me very excited.

      Sometimes I’m beside myself!  It is all good!

      Love and hugs,

      Rebekka!

    • #136292
      Anonymous

      Hey, though straight I have explored the femme stereotypes: bridal gown and maternity dress… yes, with a bump! Enjoyable, yes!

    • #136300
      Anonymous

      It’s not wierd – and it’s not just you either!

      Researchers have long known that neither sexuality or gender itself are binary, but we’ve been brought up like girls are over here, boys are over there, and there are like these gay people we don’t talk about.

      When we grow up, this is so inbred that unfairness naturally arises – the artificial gulfs created lead to relationship problems and inequality.

      As for the sexual side, everybody has stuff that makes them excited – and that is great! We all need excitement and entertainment – but not to the detriment of our families and the world around us.

      So as long as you don’t get kicks out of something harmful, and I don’t even want to name the horrible stuff (I am such a girl!), then no harm done.

      Doing things, living life, checking off a bucket list of tasks to perform while dressed makes me so excited – but I channel that into my intimacy with my wife to enhance our private lives (and you better believe it works an absolute treat!).

      Being dressed turns ordinary stuff like housework, a country walk or a shopping trip into life-enhancing, dream-like, almost magical experiences – and the energy charge built up that way lasts a long time…

      It’s probably related to endorphins, dopamine and stuff (the brain’s chemical rewards to the body), but I’m only interested in the science as a way to explain things – not quite nerdy enough to do all the research.

      So quite normal and natural!

      Enjoy, accept, embrace, share.

      Love

      Laura

    • #136393

      When I dress as a woman I become completely feminine and have all of the features that go with it.

      I am heterosexual but when dressed in female mode I tend to want to be with a man and act like a woman. I would love to date a man. And who knows?

      But in male mode I am attracted only to females.

      I

    • #140364

      I don’t know that is is ‘weird’, but of course each of us is wired a little differently. I have always been sexually attracted to women, but I would not at all be opposed to being intimate with a men or women when I’m in feminine mode – however, for me, feminine mode doesn’t necessarily have to do with what I’m wearing as much as it is a mental state. I am fairly fluid and my desires and moods can shift dramatically without warning (I’d so love to know what triggers this!) and I can as easily find myself thinking “oh my, he could do anything he wants to me…”

      Growing up, I always wanted to be around the girls (because I wanted to be just like them, even as a little boy) and loved being a part of their conversations – talking about clothes was always my favorite and still is, but there were also many a conversation about prospective boyfriends, or which actors were the hottest and such. They were always inclusive, but they of course wanted to know which girls I liked, because that was the typical expectation. They would give me tips and advice on how to attract girls, how to talk to them (as though I needed that -I was talking to them!) and other advice. I think this kind of exposure only enhanced my feminine side – I would mimic them, their actions, they way they spoke. I fit in and I enjoyed it so much!

      Of course, I’d be part of similar conversations from the male perspective as well, but those were always so… derogatory. And less fun. I tell my daughters all the time, “boys are dumb. Like, DUMB.” Spending time in male mode meant (and still does, sadly) biting my tongue, calling out misogynous bullshit, and offering honest advice that would seldom be heeded, all while trying to fit in while being uncomfortable and feeling awkward, like I was missing a key element to being a true part of the group.

      Now, as an adult, I feel much freer in expressing myself. For the most part, I am comfortable with who I am, and part of that is being able to say, “yes, that man is ridiculously attractive,” without it sounding or feeling weird. The difference now between male mode and female mode is blurred quite a bit. Besides, who wouldn’t want a little more love and attention in their life? To paraphrase Oberyn (who is objectively super hot, BTW), why limit yourself to only half the world’s pleasures?

    • #140960

      It’s not unusual Samantha. I’ve experienced the same thing, even though I’m not attracted to men at all as a man. It’s part of the fantasy of being a “complete woman”. As Laura very aptly stated, there are certain gender norms we are socialized to accept and this is one of them. But, honestly, don’t worry about what’s “weird” or “normal”. Instead, do what makes YOU happy.

    • #141422
      Anonymous

      I think in femme you might give in to any fantasy like that but deny it while in male mode.  I was reluctant at first to have anything to do with men but once I had a bit of experience I came to accept and ultimately realized I can enjoy anyone (man, woman, TS, TV, etc.) in femme or not if the situation is right.  I’m not saying everyone is like that, I’m sure we have all had fantasies that could never be reality for a multitude of reasons, main thing is not to feel bad about them, they’re just fantasies.

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