What are your coping mechanisms for when you're not able to dress?
This poll asks what you do to keep yourself from going crazy when you can't dress.
- Counseling
- Prayer
- Read CD/TV fiction
- Participate in online forums
- Read others' stories
- Look at others' pictures
- Remember previous times when you've been able to dress
- Look at pictures of yourself dressed
- Immerse myself in my male life and try not to think about it
- Other
- underdress
- This topic has 23 replies, 23 voices, and was last updated 1 week ago by
Becky Davis.
- CreatorTopic
- January 25, 2023 at 8:52 am #712141
Holly Morris
ParticipantRegistered On: April 15, 2022Topics: 107Replies: 287Has thanked: 3469 timesBeen thanked: 3376 timesHi ladies!
We all know that many of us who crossdress don’t always have a situation that allows us to dress whenever/wherever we’d like to. Because of that, stress can build up, leading to more frustration and other issues that may sometimes affect our relationships with our loved ones. To deal with that, there are a lot of outlets and options, ranging from participating in online forums, to counseling, to reading CD/TV stories and fiction, to prayer. There’s also tactics such as remembering times when you have dressed, looking at pictures of yourself dressed, or, on the opposite end of the spectrum, totally immersing yourself in your male life and trying not to think about not being able to dress. And of course, I’m sure there are many other ways as well.
But do those work, or do they actually make it more difficult? I know that for me, when I’m unable to dress as much as I need to, being part of this community and reading others’ stories, talking with them, and looking at their pictures has been a great source of not only comfort, but inspiration as well.
So of course, that got me to wondering…
If you’re in that situation, what are your coping mechanisms when you’re not able to dress? Or in other words, how do you manage that situation so you don’t go crazy?
Hugs,
Holly
PS – This is a multiple response poll, so you don’t have to choose just one response.
Total of 24 users thanked author for this post. Here are last 20 listed.
melissa la quinta,
Becky Davis,
Irene Hanley,
April Sinclair,
Kris Burton,
karley delaware,
Carolyn Kay,
Ashley Konners,
Michelle McQueen,
Jessica Velasquez,
ThereseW,
Michelle Trott,
Liara Wolfe,
Susan Talbot,
Jillian(Jill) Evers,
Gwyneth,
Peggy Sue Williams,
Lauren Mugnaia,
Requal Joanne,
Roberta Lane
- CreatorTopic
- AuthorReplies
- January 28, 2023 at 7:43 am #712996
Becky Davis
LadyRegistered On: February 10, 2022Topics: 0Replies: 125Has thanked: 1473 timesBeen thanked: 564 timesI voted under dressing almost always and of course reading the CDH forums, everyone on here has been so much fun to read about. Just had a DR appointment the other day so out came the boring underwear, but as soon as I got home couldn’t wait to get them off and into something I’m more comfortable in. I have been buying more woman’s clothes that I can wear out such as jeans, wore them to do some shopping last weekend and it was great, the first time I have done that!!! I have also some shorts for during the summer that I have been wearing more and plan to get more for this summer. And it’s all thanks to everyone on here to give me the courage to get a bit more daring.
4 users thanked author for this post.
- January 27, 2023 at 11:08 am #712746
karley delaware
Baroness - AnnualRegistered On: October 23, 2017Topics: 10Replies: 452Has thanked: 2471 timesBeen thanked: 1449 timesHi Holly………Thank You once again for another topic to help us understand ourselves. I like to look at my pictures or think about wonderful times I had while dressed. I have a SO approved Pony Tail that helps me feel so girly…………so far……….it is just below my shoulders………….she would like to have it down to my butt. (!!!) Think she suspects…..something? When not able to dress I like to take my t-shirt off and feel the pony tail on my bare back…………………….or pull it back to put a claw clip or band on it while crossing my legs like a girl……………………..maybe flick it side to side to loosen it up ………………………………when not quite alone………..I will wear a clip on earring to feel girly ………..when wearing over the knee guy shorts……I will cuff them up to show more legs ……………………when driving alone at night…………I have my mask on…..clip on earring………pony tail…..t-shirt …from a distance……..kinda look like a gal with little tits……….driving carefully…..like a girl…………………guys can be so sweet!!!! HA HA …..if they only knew!!! karley
4 users thanked author for this post.
- January 27, 2023 at 2:49 am #712663
Kris Burton
LadyRegistered On: August 6, 2022Topics: 1Replies: 120Has thanked: 515 timesBeen thanked: 734 timesIt’s not so much of a coping mechanism for me, because participating in online forums and connecting with others I view as part of my overall CD experience. Even if I cannot dress for a time, I don’t experience too much stress because I always have that – and it always feels great to get back to dressing when I do. I also always find it inspirational to view others photos – I learn so much and can apply it to my own presentation when I return to my own dressing.
4 users thanked author for this post.
- January 27, 2023 at 1:04 am #712656
Roberta Broussard
BaronessRegistered On: July 20, 2020Topics: 7Replies: 500Has thanked: 6860 timesBeen thanked: 2464 timesWhen I can’t dress. I occupy myself with either viewing and conversing with others on CDH or shopping online.
9 users thanked author for this post.
- January 27, 2023 at 12:30 am #712653
Rhonda Lee
Baroness - AnnualRegistered On: September 29, 2021Topics: 3Replies: 191Has thanked: 218 timesBeen thanked: 943 timesI underdress constantly and avoid weapons and sharp objects in case I am inclined to do anything rash. This week has been non-stop doctor visits, forcing me to reuse the only two pairs of men’s briefs remaining in my wardrobe. I resorted to showing off my pink toenails and explaining to a new doctor today that some men need bone scans because osteoporosis is not just a “woman’s disease” and if treatment with estrogen works for women it should not be dismissed for men just because it leads to breast growth… some men can tolerate such side effects. For others, that is the point(s). I’m switching to a female doctor. They seem to understand some things (ok, a LOT of things) that are less apparent to men. I’m also curious to know what she will do at the annual physical. Will she stick a finger where the sun don’t shine or check my prostate?
4 users thanked author for this post.
- January 26, 2023 at 7:28 pm #712620
Carolyn Kay
Baroness - AnnualRegistered On: August 25, 2016Topics: 21Replies: 492Has thanked: 1920 timesBeen thanked: 2310 timesMy situation does mean there will be times when I will not be able to fully dress got some time. I fall back on my friends for support by sharing with them stories for who we are. If that doesn’t work there is always a glass of wine, lol.
5 users thanked author for this post.
- January 26, 2023 at 12:41 pm #712538
Ashley Konners
LadyRegistered On: August 15, 2020Topics: 43Replies: 666Has thanked: 2310 timesBeen thanked: 3364 timesI still use the term underdress but really it’s just part of my routine to put on my panties, bralette and cami and pantyhose in the cooler weather on a daily basis. Not so much at work but when able on weeknights and ends it’s a touch of mascara and eye shadow , womens jeans and a light splash of perfume. Seems to get me through.
4 users thanked author for this post.
- January 26, 2023 at 12:11 pm #712528
Michelle McQueen
LadyRegistered On: June 14, 2021Topics: 31Replies: 1809Has thanked: 12994 timesBeen thanked: 9078 timesI under dress every day with the basic bra and panties and sometimes other wear like pantyhose, leggings, feminine pads and always use feminine deodorant. I’ve let my hair grow out in a nice ponytail and have earrings which can be seen as either common for both sexes or as a CD thing depending on ones perspective. I can feel girly all day every day without fully presenting as female. I do like to dress full out when I can but thats not often enough.
I come here every morning and read the latest post loving the common sisterhood of all the girls experiences. I will probably never meet anyone from here but its an enlightening and satisfying connection.
4 users thanked author for this post.
- January 26, 2023 at 6:08 am #712428
J J
LadyRegistered On: September 13, 2019Topics: 5Replies: 508Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 1958 timesSince I wear panties exclusively, I am always underdressed, so that is my normal. As for not having a chance to wear much outerwear, I do sneak somethings in. I having been on a month long ski trip and visiting family, so sharing houses and or motel rooms with others. I wear women’s yoga tunic as lounge wear, and nobody is the wiser. Same with women’s yoga pants.
I do stay caught up on the forms, and review/post past pictures as well. I am looking forward to being home though, and getting into some nice lingerie and a dress.
5 users thanked author for this post.
- January 26, 2023 at 5:01 am #712414
Janet Woodham
LadyRegistered On: January 21, 2021Topics: 1Replies: 78Has thanked: 499 timesBeen thanked: 386 timesThis is the time of year when I visit family and therefore the only time when I cannot spend the vast majority of my time as a woman. I will have had a five week break between visits when I can be Janet which helps. I fine enjoying the moment, having good company and fresh scenes of enjoyment all help and time passes quickly. The worst is the day before departure when I wonder how I shall cope but always find I do.
6 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 9:26 pm #712374
Michelle Trott
DuchessRegistered On: April 7, 2021Topics: 1Replies: 622Has thanked: 2312 timesBeen thanked: 2813 timesEither working playing or dressing. There isn’t much else.
4 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 6:18 pm #712334
Alison Anderson
DuchessRegistered On: October 15, 2018Topics: 15Replies: 949Has thanked: 760 timesBeen thanked: 4019 timesI haven’t had a long stretch of not dressing in a long time, and that was when I was on two different trips. Before that I had opportunities quite often.
I’m divorced now, and although I live with 1+ adult children (one is in college, so is not home all the time), I dress in front of them. Before the divorce, I was living separate (my ex moved out) so I was in he same situation.
Before my ex moved out, I had already moved out of the bedroom. This meant I could dress every night.
When I can’t dress, I either underdress in panties (and in the winter I may wear tights), or I dress in stealth mode. I’ll wear a tee shirt or jeans from the women’s department but looks close enough to men’s. I’ll wear women’s trouser socks or low women’s sweat socks. I’ll wear women’s flats that can pass as men’s. In gym classes I’m usually wearing a woman’s pair of shorts that passes as men’s. I have a women’s jeans jacket and a women’s cardigan that I have worn.
So I usually find some way to wear something.
5 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 4:05 pm #712286
Jillian(Jill) Evers
LadyRegistered On: August 2, 2022Topics: 5Replies: 64Has thanked: 331 timesBeen thanked: 356 timesHi Holly, I do look at Pictures & Dream of I wish.. But It also can put
me in a Depression which I sometimes handle by writing.. Songs, Verses,
and things that come from that mindset.. Thank You!!💖4 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 2:16 pm #712236
Alexa TB
LadyRegistered On: January 25, 2023Topics: 4Replies: 9Has thanked: 75 timesBeen thanked: 96 timesCan I answer that I’m not coping very well at all?
6 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 2:00 pm #712232
Julie
LadyRegistered On: March 19, 2021Topics: 12Replies: 101Has thanked: 31 timesBeen thanked: 275 timesI did not vote sweetie. Instead I’ll say I do not go crazy. I try to be in femme mode 24/7 with the resolution to become femme 24/7 girlfriend.
4 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 11:15 am #712189
Lauren Mugnaia
DuchessRegistered On: November 1, 2021Topics: 24Replies: 643Has thanked: 10619 timesBeen thanked: 3639 timesI voted other because none of the choices apply to me now as I am, like Emily, living as a woman, legally a female. Let me tell you, that is the ultimate coping mechanism.
I have upper and lower partial dentures and my denturist said it has been 8 years since they were made and it’s time to have them redone. She knows I am transgendered and said this time she’s going to give me a beautiful new feminine smile. I’ve tried on the temporary ones and they’re so pretty I can’t believe the difference it’s going to make! I will post pictures when I get my new smile on February 10th.
Hugs,
Ms. Lauren M
6 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 11:10 am #712185
Roberta Lane
LadyRegistered On: May 10, 2022Topics: 11Replies: 104Has thanked: 466 timesBeen thanked: 461 timesHappily I am sixty two and have been retired from work for a few years.I have a supportive wife who has been cool about my femme side for the last seven years after a good many years of not being comfortable with it.As a result, hardly a week goes by without me being Roberta at home for a good part of the week.In the days when I was working full time and was closeted dressing up time was limited.I had to book a day or two off from work every now and again in order to dress when my wife was at work.During the long weeks and months when I could not do it,I would cope by looking at women’s clothes catalogues for UK stores such as Next.They were quite large and were full of skirts,dresses,blouses and shoes in my preferred style that I could browse and fantasise about wearing.The other thing was clocking all the lovely womenswear at the stores my wife shopped in.She didn’t know that I was a crossdresser then but I would clock all the wonderful outfits as my wife shopped.We had great bricks and mortar stores back then such as Dorothy Perkins.Nowadays, I only have sustained periods of not dressing when we go on vacation for a week or two.The tension is alleviated by some girly shopping with the wife.Albeit with me in male mode.But my wife and I share the same sense of style.She picks the same skirts,dresses and tops as the ones she desires and picks them out in my size in addition to hers.It gives me something to look forward to when we get home.And my wife loves to see me looking as glamorous and pretty as she when I try them on.
9 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 10:58 am #712176
Requal Joanne
LadyRegistered On: December 15, 2020Topics: 7Replies: 572Has thanked: 628 timesBeen thanked: 1936 timesI remember the times I have dressed and look forward to the (long time to wait) occasions when I able to dress.
7 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 10:12 am #712161
Emily Alt
HostessRegistered On: August 24, 2019Topics: 24Replies: 1283Has thanked: 1439 timesBeen thanked: 6625 timesMuch like Deborah, I’ve gotten to a place where my clothing choices don’t affect my mental health. Girl brain.
It took many years of struggling with my gender identity to get here. During that time, therapy and online forums helped.
I also leaned on alcohol a bit too much. Overcoming that challenge taught me a ton of important coping skills that I’ve been able to apply in every part of my life.
Good topic!
/EA
8 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 9:57 am #712160
Jess Secret
LadyRegistered On: February 18, 2021Topics: 15Replies: 605Has thanked: 1475 timesBeen thanked: 2620 timesIn my case I stay busy during the day in male mode (work on weekdays, other things on the weekends), I’ll daydream about dressing, and have it to look forward to at bedtime every night (romantic lingerie). So I definitely have my coping mechanisms in place.
6 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 9:31 am #712153
Wendy Swift
LadyRegistered On: May 11, 2020Topics: 12Replies: 925Has thanked: 1003 timesBeen thanked: 4237 timesThis past weekend was busy, family get together meant I did not have any time to transform into Wendy.
I was literally antsy sunday afternoon not being able to fully transform. I underdress most of the work week, so that keeps my CDing urges at bay (kinda). So this past weekend I was at least able to underdress so that kept my angst somewhat at bay. Spritzing some nice feminine perfume also helps too.
6 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 8:57 am #712143
Deborah Sullivan
LadyRegistered On: February 27, 2020Topics: 2Replies: 1071Has thanked: 5412 timesBeen thanked: 4726 timesSince I perceive myself as a woman I do consciously act out as a woman in public just feeling I am wearing my boyfriends clothes.
7 users thanked author for this post.
- January 25, 2023 at 8:58 am #712144
Holly Morris
LadyRegistered On: April 15, 2022Topics: 107Replies: 287Has thanked: 3469 timesBeen thanked: 3376 timesDeborah, I love that answer!
Hugs,
Holly
2 users thanked author for this post.
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