Tagged: 

Viewing 58 reply threads
  • Author
    Replies
    • #440453
      Rachel Cross
      Duchess
      Registered On: October 13, 2020
      Topics: 29
      Replies: 247
      Has thanked: 1456 times
      Been thanked: 1425 times

      i got a label, its special. i get asked all the time what do i go by? he, she, trans, ect. i always say call me what you want. racheal, he, she, bitch, bastard, ect. it dont matter to me. i will let you know if i dont like it. just know im a person. im a transformer. i can switch from male to female and have no problem being either one. i might have a split personality. i can be strong like a male or tender like a female. i live in and have the best of both worlds. i can talk guy talk and girl talk at the same time. i get along with everyone. you should wish you were like me. ( special )

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #440439
      Trisha Smith
      Duchess
      Registered On: August 24, 2020
      Topics: 7
      Replies: 121
      Has thanked: 47 times
      Been thanked: 544 times

      This is easy. I identify as an American.

      Trisha

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #440381
      Lee Ann Rakers
      Lady
      Registered On: August 18, 2019
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 596
      Has thanked: 961 times
      Been thanked: 1901 times

      I list in my CDH profile “transgender” even though I have no plans on transitioning.

      I guess bigender would be more accurate though.

      Lee Ann

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #440377
      Danielle Anaya
      Lady
      Registered On: January 3, 2020
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 34
      Has thanked: 3 times
      Been thanked: 127 times

      I would say I am a bi-sexual, crossdressing man who has chosen to embrace femininity and chooses to live as a woman full time.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #440171
      Candy Can
      Lady
      Registered On: October 19, 2018
      Topics: 35
      Replies: 129
      Has thanked: 270 times
      Been thanked: 675 times

      This is a very good thread and a good question to ask.

      I think many of us have trouble answering it succinctly, and therein lies many of our struggles and confusion.

      My best answer perhaps is just for me.

      Jung’s theory was that we each have a mixture of male and female within us, the percentage and which is in the majority are different for each person.

      So IF that theory is right, if you are a mix, mostly of your birth gender, be that M or F, then you may be a girly girl, or a manly man.
      Something around 25-50% of the other gender might give you some identity issues?
      And if you are a majority percentage of the ‘other gender’?………..

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #440141
      Polly Stewart
      Lady
      Registered On: January 2, 2021
      Topics: 5
      Replies: 605
      Has thanked: 751 times
      Been thanked: 1793 times

      Hi Birel

      I have just read an article on Hannahmcknight.org about identity. Hannah McKnight uses the term bi-gender as, hmmm… not growing a beard as it would affect the femme side and not taking oestrogen as it would interfere with her boy side.
      So in order to update my status… I will call myself bi-gender until I go further into the fog!

      Love your bi-gender Polly

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #439660
      DeLora
      Lady
      Registered On: October 15, 2019
      Topics: 60
      Replies: 286
      Has thanked: 919 times
      Been thanked: 1549 times

      This is a question I have been asking myself for decades.

      I have concluded that I am certainly under the transgender umbrella, but I have no strong desire to transition. My male side is just as important to me as my female side.

      The label I am currently working with is dual gender, but really, I am just being me and don’t want to be defined by any label.

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #439625
      Anonymous
      Registered On:
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 12
      Has thanked: 73 times
      Been thanked: 51 times

      Birel:

      I feel much the same. I won’t ever transition, nor dress full time. However the desire and satisfaction is real when I have those desires. Also, I am bisexual. So that adds some confusion to the mix. If choosing maybe gender fluid? It depends on the mood. When I can dress (home alone for long period.) I don’t always feel the desire to do it and won’t. Other times it is all I can think about and if I have the opportunity I am all in. Sometimes I sneak away and put in some lingerie for the feel of only for a few minutes. I like myself as Anne. I like myself as me too. So be happy with yourself. Everyone’s deal is a bit different, but there is good support here. Go with what you feel girlfriend

      Xoxo

      Anne

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #439619
      Tabitha James
      Lady
      Registered On: November 25, 2020
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 11
      Has thanked: 3 times
      Been thanked: 49 times

      It took me a long time to figure it out. I got a degree in Psychology studying just this subject, trying to figure myself out. After 3 years of 300-400 level classes in Psyc, sexual, and gender studies, I still didn’t know and was even more confused. All of the labels, diagnoses, terms, descriptions, or stereotypes simply didn’t fit. The umbrella constantly changes color to reflect who is sitting under it and no single label will identify ones inter-being. Because I didn’t want to cut off my tally whacker but took hormones and grew tiny boobies was I male or female? When I bought an IPL and started removing my body hair did that make me one or the other?

      Prior to going to school (in my 40’s), I considered myself Transgender — as I felt female inside and wanted to live as a female. But what is living like a female? I know a lot of GG who wear jeans, t-shirts and sneakers every day, never put on makeup, and consider themselves to be a straight female. It is not the clothing that dictates gender, only society can do that. 200 years ago, men in high society wore wigs and skirts. It is the individual who defines their gender and what it means. It is unfortunate but society does judge us for our behaviors. Why can a woman wear just about anything a man can but the reverse is stigmatized? It is only by the freedom of expression, by the masses, in public, that these societal norms can be changed. I veered off topic here, Who do I identify as????? Me!

    • #439598
      Anonymous
      Registered On:
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 31
      Has thanked: 27 times
      Been thanked: 189 times

      That is a very good question, I consider myself to be transgender as given the opportunity I would transition under different circumstances. My gender dysphoria is hell to pay at times and being stuck in the middle is a hard place to be. I have learned to accept this and have made progress with a gender therapist. But yes there are so many different variations it can be hard to fit into a category.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #439459
      Didi Phox
      Lady
      Registered On: January 25, 2021
      Topics: 7
      Replies: 121
      Has thanked: 134 times
      Been thanked: 557 times

      I have been trying to figure out exactly what I am, and where I fit in to the LGBTQ+ umbrella (if anywhere). As a crossdresser, by definition, we should be part of transgender. But, I have no plans to transition and I am ok presenting as masculine at times. So, I feel like a fake, comparing myself to trans people that have suffered from gender dysphoria. Perhaps I am non-binary, or gender fluid?

      So, other crossdressers, what do you identify as?

      Birel

      So thought provoking, thanks for asking.

      When I was finding myself, it almost felt that I had to have a label because that would enable me to finally fit in somewhere and understand why I feel the way I do. The logical me needed something I could hang my hat on.

      like you, I’m happy with the masc body I was given (loosing a few lb’s wouldn’t go a miss); don’t suffer with dysphoria and am comfortable flipping between one gender presentation and the other. Putting all those ingredients into the Google cooking pot didn’t give me any answers and, if anything, left me questioning more.

      Thats when I reach out to ‘the Clare project’. A fantastic group set up to support the trans community. They helped me realise that I’m gender fluid, or the more modern term being used, dual gender. And you know what, it kinda fits and feels good.

      But, and here’s the rub, what did I do with that knowledge? Absolutely nothing. Having chased my curiosity down the rabbit hole, I now realise that I don’t need a label to be fabulous, just a wig, tight dress and a pair killer heels 😘

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #439346
      Simone C
      Lady
      Registered On: January 23, 2019
      Topics: 7
      Replies: 159
      Has thanked: 55 times
      Been thanked: 577 times

      Re-posting an earlier comment which I hope helps, like manyI think the alphabet soup is a bit confusing and silly in the end. We are who we are and respect each other for it.

      Hi Girls!

      I’ve read a lot and thought a lot about this topic, and come to the conclusion that I (and many others when I read above) fit the category of “dual-role transvestite”. This is someone (of either gender) who dresses temporarily in the clothing of the opposite gender to experience what it is like to be or to take the role of the opposite gender. There is no desire for reassignment treatment, and it is not a fetish for clothing as such.

      Actually it used to be more women doing this because male-dominated society didn’t allow intelligent women into certain places and roles, so they dressed and behaved as men to experience it without prejudices. There is plenty of literature of women dressing as men for that reason, and I am sure many of them shared our fears of how society, family and their SO would react if they had been found out. There were happily also notable cases of the SO or male friends supporting them, recognising the hypocrisy of society then, and science and literature are better for it. There were of course some for whom it was sexual, many though simply recognised they could not experience or achieve something without temporarily presenting as male. Of course, women have the advantage here that it is easier as a woman to pass as a rather small, fresh faced man than it is for a large, athletic male to pass as a demure, svelte woman. I also think society then and now is more forgiving of women presenting as men (no one reacts to women in jeans, try wearing a skirt as a man though!)

      The real dilemma for me in the past was how to align this with the obvious thrill of wearing soft, sexy clothes. Surely that is a fetish? It was when I was talking though to a GG friend it fell into place. She said “I LOVE wearing something sexy, you think we buy all that lace and lingerie for men only? I get SUCH A BUZZ walking around knowing that underneath my plain business suit is a super hot set of lingerie. Wow! And at night that long slinky nightgown isn’t only for seduction, it feels good!”

      That nailed it for me, for those of us who want to experience being a woman sometimes OF COURSE getting that buzz from sexy lingerie is part of the whole thing. And yes, that is what I want. How does it feel to be a GG, sometimes in loose weekend clothes, sometimes in more sexy dress. I am being a woman, not fantasising about lingerie as such. When I am Simone I take on a feminine persona as much as I can, to experience as much as I can what that means.

      This has had some really great moments, being out and a woman admiring my dress. Yes, and I do say a woman, as she clearly saw me as a fellow woman at the time. It was an appreciative comment, woman to woman, which felt great.

      I’ve also experienced the downside of aggressive men trying to come on to the woman I was at the time and not taking the “no!”. The anger and fear I felt as a woman at that moment was real. It was not a fear of being outed, so what if I were? In some ways fun to see the idiot’s reaction to finding he was trying to hit onto a MAN! No, it was the fear that as a woman I was both at a disadvantage culturally, and that somehow this idiot thought it was OK to leer at my boobs and make lewd suggestions.

      Being in my two alternative genders lets me get a real understanding and respect for BOTH genders and the pluses and minuses of each.

      I have no desire to change permanently (I quite like my alternative), just wish I could alter the body shape as easily as I slip into the mental state of Simone. Damn, and figure out how to get the make-up right!!

      Best wishes to all of you across the spectrum, where you are is yours, I’ve found mine.

      S

    • #439335
      Amelia Lawrence
      Lady
      Registered On: January 4, 2021
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 27
      Has thanked: 69 times
      Been thanked: 118 times

      I’ve been embracing the term “dual gendered” lately. But yeah, at the end of the day it’s just a label. You are you, regardless of what it says on the name tag!

    • #439325
      Rachel Hayes
      Lady
      Registered On: January 20, 2021
      Topics: 7
      Replies: 110
      Has thanked: 386 times
      Been thanked: 526 times

      As a new CDer, I have been battling with this very question myself recently.  Sure, I am a genetic male and, unfortunately, live the majority of my life in male mode.  I have a sexual attraction to both men and women so that makes me bisexual, right?  Well not quite because there is the added layer of my femme and, as Rachel, also fancy both men and women.  On top of all of that, I also find other CDers and TS/TG very attractive.  I am now at the point where I’m saying to hell with labels and, as many have said on here, I am me and who that is changes (so maybe gender fluid?).  Much as I’d love to be femme more and more, I have no plans to physically transition (at the moment at least) and, as such, there are times where I have to present male and those times I am male and all other times, I’m lovely Rachel 🙂  If you’re my friend (I see all you girls as friends 🙂 ), then it matters not the label.

      Without wanting to open a hornet’s nest, I see this as similar to the race situation of 30 years ago (yes, I know it is still rife in many places today).  Public attitude and perception will change but unfortunately that culture shift takes time.  As many on these forums have noted when out, most people don’t bat an eye and a small minority of ignorant people comment or jibe.  I am happy to stand up and say I really don’t care if you’re black, white or purple, L, G, B, T or anything else.  If you’re a nice human being then I want to be your friend and nice to you!

      Sorry for rambling on and on…

      Love Rachel

    • #439323
      Lysette Anthony
      Lady
      Registered On: January 25, 2021
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 18
      Has thanked: 79 times
      Been thanked: 96 times

      Same here, I’m 65 next week and although I’ve never been a masculine male, I don’t feel a feminine female either. I just love cross dressing and have done since my 20’s

    • #439319
      Ashley Konners
      Lady
      Registered On: August 15, 2020
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 98
      Has thanked: 454 times
      Been thanked: 326 times

      Well call me what you will. I’m a man who has a very strong feminine side and have been dressing for years and absolutely love being Ashley. Crossdresser to some is an old school word but I use it to describe what I do.
      I don’t get caught up in terms or labels. I’m Ashley as much as time permits and at this point in my life I’m starting to venture out and enjoy my life with Ashley in it.

      Hugs

      Ashley.

    • #434916
      Samantha Roarke
      Ambassador
      Registered On: April 17, 2019
      Topics: 43
      Replies: 1383
      Has thanked: 4263 times
      Been thanked: 3004 times

      Labels are for cans! I’m just a human! I’m just me!

      -Samantha Roarke-

    • #434913
      Deborah Sullivan
      Duchess
      Registered On: February 27, 2020
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 534
      Has thanked: 2287 times
      Been thanked: 2063 times

      I just say I am a gay crossdresser that enjoys being both a man and a woman

    • #434768
      Amanda Burton
      Baroness - Annual
      Registered On: January 15, 2020
      Topics: 22
      Replies: 1107
      Has thanked: 7778 times
      Been thanked: 4239 times

      Well I am just a human being, that likes to, or rather has a passion of crossdressing and being feminine. I don’t have a label, don’t need a label, others may label me, that their prerogative. How I choose to live is nobody’s business, my orientation too come to that,and I have no interest in others, other than being friends regardless of their orientation and pleasures.

      We are simply humans, born, live, die regardless.

    • #434724
      Andrea Stone
      Lady
      Registered On: January 6, 2021
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 14
      Has thanked: 8 times
      Been thanked: 70 times

      I’m a heterosexual man who cross-dresses. That may not be anywhere in the LGBTQ+ spectrum unless I’m part of the ‘+’ but it doesn’t bother me as I tend not to label myself anyway. (I’ve lost count of the bank cards, cheque books, etc. I’ve sent back until they’ve stopped putting ‘Mr’ on them). I’m fully supportive of the LGBTQ+ movement, I just don’t think of myself as part of it.

    • #434325
      Leah Adkam
      Lady
      Registered On: December 18, 2020
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 20
      Has thanked: 77 times
      Been thanked: 132 times

      The world sees me as a regular straight guy, and quite butch at that. Deep down I know I’m a bisexual crossdresser, that’s what I identify with, and it’s very nice to be myself here. Would it be fun and lovely to live my day to day 100% en femme? Absolutely! But I don’t think that’s going to happen, and I content myself with the occasional excursions to allow Leah to have a few moments in the sun.

    • #434272
      Alice Robinson
      Lady
      Registered On: July 3, 2020
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 16
      Has thanked: 39 times
      Been thanked: 140 times

      As humans,we do love a label,don’t we? I suppose it helps us to navigate the world and satisfy our base tribal urge to identify the same as well as the ‘other’.
      Its enough to be ‘me’; I don’t know what it feels like to be anything else. But,we must remember that people before us have fought and died to wear a badge, and they have the right to wear it with pride. If you have been through the pain and sadness to reach the high ground, then you deserve respect, but our struggles are not all the same ,and we must not judge anyone elsw for having less ‘commitment ‘ than ourselves.
      Ultimately, we’re all people who deserve respect, love and warmth whatever our journey has been or where we came from.
      Alice x

    • #434149
      Sandy Jayson
      Duchess
      Registered On: September 29, 2019
      Topics: 17
      Replies: 405
      Has thanked: 832 times
      Been thanked: 1766 times

      Birel, I’ve put a lot of thought into how to respond to this. Am I a cross dresser, am I gender fluid, am I transgender???  40 years ago when I was into this deep I would have called myself a transvestite.  That term, while still accurate, I no longer like.  A couple of close people to me would say I’m a transgender and almost sound like they would be acceptable of me if I started taking hormones and had ‘ the surgery’.  I my mind right now I would like to present myself as female 24/7 for a few weeks and then go back and forth for a while to see where I did fit in my own mind and family around me.  I guess that might make me more gender fluid?? don’t know

      Last night I watched a Utube video from a transsexual who said she hatted crossdressers.  She said they were just men playing at being a woman and most were trolling looking for hookups.  I was at first offended by her attitude untill I looked back at the web sites I found before finding CDH and those persons were exactly that.  Thosesites were so bad I would likely be still deeeeeeeep in the closet or purged and tried once again to give it up.

      So I guess I am still fluidly sliding around in my mind where I fit in, what I want to be.

      Sandy

    • #434119
      Dawn Wyvern
      Ambassador
      Registered On: February 23, 2019
      Topics: 5
      Replies: 245
      Has thanked: 230 times
      Been thanked: 987 times

      I have a very unique label – ‘Me.’

      nothing more nothing less …

      Hugs

      Dawn x

    • #434056
      Sarah Du Hessisse
      Lady
      Registered On: September 16, 2020
      Topics: 15
      Replies: 318
      Has thanked: 1304 times
      Been thanked: 1075 times

      Rozalyne is so right we should not put labels people, thats what certain members of society want so they can say, your one of those and belong in the corner over there. However I am a Glamour Model  and a real Diva Bitch.

      Love you all

      Sarah xx

    • #434031
      Haley Ann
      Lady
      Registered On: October 12, 2020
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 72
      Has thanked: 54 times
      Been thanked: 283 times

      In reality, I’m a man. That’s how I live 90% of my life…husband, father, grandfather. Only recently have I started to feel a deeper meaning behind my desire (it’s really more a need, as quitting is no longer even a fleeting thought) beyond the initial physical excitement, but I have no plans to take it further at this point. I am enjoying exploring  “real clothes”, and have considered having “the talk” at home…but still not sure what my motive for that or my expectations are.

      As for my preference, I’d say pansexual as I am attracted to biological women, CDs and transwomen, and Haley loves a mature gentleman. As one of our sisters here on CDH said, “we are complicated creatures, aren’t we”?

      Haley

    • #434024
      Requal Joanne Jones
      Lady
      Registered On: December 15, 2020
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 44
      Has thanked: 47 times
      Been thanked: 165 times

      I am just a male who just enjoys the feeling of wearing female apparel and being in touch with his feminine side.  It is a pity that I have to do in private as I like to share.  No labels on me.

    • #434022
      Jenny Thigh High
      Lady
      Registered On: August 10, 2019
      Topics: 7
      Replies: 226
      Has thanked: 1122 times
      Been thanked: 1066 times

      While I certainly understand the many replies arguing against labels – I don’t have any issue calling myself a gay male CD. I’m not trans and I don’t consider myself a girl. Gay male CD fits me perfectly.

    • #434014
      Serena Stevens
      Duchess
      Registered On: December 30, 2020
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 85
      Has thanked: 96 times
      Been thanked: 298 times

      Ever go to a conference where they hand out those labels for your jacket, shirt or (one day) blouse? Notice how they never stay on, especially if you’re constantly moving and not worrying about how it looks?

      That’s how this girl feels about labels. Too busy moving around and enjoying the scenery and conversation to worry about a label sticking to me.

    • #434003
      Angela Booth
      Lady
      Registered On: August 1, 2020
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 67
      Has thanked: 70 times
      Been thanked: 334 times

      I have looked at all the labels – They all say 14(U.K.) That fits me just fine…

      • #439636
        Polly Stewart
        Lady
        Registered On: January 2, 2021
        Topics: 5
        Replies: 605
        Has thanked: 751 times
        Been thanked: 1793 times

        Oh God… Angela, I nearly choked on my coffee reading that! Hi, I’m Polly and I’m an 18(UK) on the LGBQTetc scale of alternate beings… pleased to meet you 14(UK).

        Hugs Polly

        4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #434002
      Rozalyne Richards
      Lady
      Registered On: March 10, 2018
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 396
      Has thanked: 752 times
      Been thanked: 1325 times

      You shouldn’t put labels on people or put them in boxes labels are what you put on clothes and shoes go in boxes,

      Me myself consider myself as a bi-sexual cross-dresser who has only one foot out of the closet (I must oil them hinges they’ve been stuck for a while).

      I’ve often wondered what a pansexual is can anyone enlighten me on that,

      Hugs Rozalyne x

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #433948
      Jill Marshall
      Duchess
      Registered On: June 28, 2020
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 39
      Has thanked: 43 times
      Been thanked: 222 times

      Wouldn’t it be nice someday to be able to just go anywhere you want, not thinking of yourself or others as anything and not having anyone think of you as anything?

      • #439640
        Polly Stewart
        Lady
        Registered On: January 2, 2021
        Topics: 5
        Replies: 605
        Has thanked: 751 times
        Been thanked: 1793 times

        Oh, yes Jill… it would be marvellous to do so. But isn’t it the whole reason we do this? So we are noticed? Doesn’t everyone want others to label us as beautiful women? To be noticed in this one endeavour?
        I think I do… that is, I just adore being complimented and recognised for the effort I put into my appearance, the clothes I love to wear, the shoes that compliment, the makeup that provokes…
        My wife said to me yesterday that when men used to wolf-whistle at women, women knew they were being recognised for the effort as well as the gender.
        But, yes… the freedom to be who one is without fear or rancour would be to live in a utopian dream… sadly, not attainable.

        Hugs xxx Polly

        2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #433942
      karley delaware
      Baroness - Annual
      Registered On: October 23, 2017
      Topics: 10
      Replies: 420
      Has thanked: 1907 times
      Been thanked: 1192 times

      For me it’s gender fluid……………as my Pink and Blue sides float side to side…………..but happiest when I am in the middle, a little towards Pink.

    • #433904
      Clara Cross
      Lady
      Registered On: December 7, 2020
      Topics: 7
      Replies: 145
      Has thanked: 399 times
      Been thanked: 661 times

      You have certainly struck a chord here, Birel. Labels can be helpful in a general way but are very dissatisfying at the individual level. Personally, I don’t care too much about the “who” or “what” part in which I might fit. As a late blooming xDresser I think more often about the “why”. Not in a troubling sort of way, but it’s fascinating to me to ruminate on what has led me to this point. Although it can be a rabbit-hole trying to figure it out, I don’t let it consume me. In the meantime,I am totally enjoying this part of me, loving my sisters on CDH, and frankly, trying to figure out what to wear today!

      Best to you,
      Clara

    • #433898
      Giselle Reeves
      Lady
      Registered On: September 27, 2017
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 144
      Has thanked: 578 times
      Been thanked: 431 times

      a mixed up person wandering around the world aimlessly

    • #433887
      patty williams
      Lady
      Registered On: January 19, 2019
      Topics: 68
      Replies: 1267
      Has thanked: 2112 times
      Been thanked: 4369 times

      HI Birel,

      Great Topic.

      I know many here hate labels period but I think we all desire to have a word that describes us efficiently if someone asks.

      You are In no way a fake but a wonderful beautiful person that is doing her best to explore her feminine side and we all love and respect you here.

      Im with you, I have a hard time figuring that out.

      I have lived most of my life male and now its hard to change that.

      If I could I would without hurting everybody I would.

      I guess the best description of me is gender fluid for now.

      I do like Transfeminine a lot.

      I am OK with my male side ,although if I could I would be femme all the time ,although its hard to let go of who you have been for 50 years.LOL

      Hugs Patty

    • #433878
      Anonymous
      Registered On:
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 227
      Has thanked: 298 times
      Been thanked: 919 times

      I understand your confusion but..

      Don’t try and define who you are by trying to fit in under a label.

      Be happy enjoy the journey.

      Hugs

      Jessica

       

    • #433871
      Stevie Steiner
      Ambassador
      Registered On: June 11, 2020
      Topics: 43
      Replies: 995
      Has thanked: 4719 times
      Been thanked: 5161 times

      “Hi, I am a genetically man-sexed, female gender, bi curious, formerly suppressed crossdresser.  I think that should cover it…..  You may call me “miss” or Stevie.

      😁

      • #433922
        Anonymous
        Registered On:
        Topics: 58
        Replies: 1713
        Has thanked: 7773 times
        Been thanked: 9458 times

        Stevie…..is that a label or a dictionary???….either way I think you have covered it….cutie!!!

        Grace x

        • #433923
          Stevie Steiner
          Ambassador
          Registered On: June 11, 2020
          Topics: 43
          Replies: 995
          Has thanked: 4719 times
          Been thanked: 5161 times

          ‘Tis a wee bit of a mouthful, isn’t it?  Lol

          Honestly I would be happy with “babe”, but that’s pushing reality! 😅😅

          4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #433866
      stephanie plumb
      Baroness - Annual
      Registered On: November 17, 2018
      Topics: 135
      Replies: 1675
      Has thanked: 2604 times
      Been thanked: 7388 times

      This is a much trickier question than it appears at face value.

      I am Stephanie, just me, myself – a girl in a man’s body.  As we are all unique, LGBTQ+ labels don’t really apply as we would need a new one for each and every one of us.  As bobbi has said – its not what but who we are that matters. These spectrum labels are an artificial construct that has run away with itself trying to put us all into boxes – well they need an infinite number then.

      Birel, as you are uniquely you, there is no need to compare yourself to anybody else. Nor are you a fake. Just be Birel, happy in your own skin.  Hello Birel, nice to meet you.

      If I have to have an identity label then it is “Stephanie.”  There is no one else on this planet quite like me. (that doesn’t sound quite right!)  –  I am unique. As we all are.

      But the catch is that we cannot get away from labels. We have been labelled already. From the moment of birth we were labelled as Animal, Vertebrate, Mammal, Primate, Homo Sapien ………..  and  assigned Male or Female at birth. And handed a name  aligned with our biological sex.

      And we were only second or minutes old……

      Stephanie P

    • #433862
      Celeste Starre
      Lady
      Registered On: June 26, 2018
      Topics: 34
      Replies: 844
      Has thanked: 266 times
      Been thanked: 2661 times

      bigendered

    • #433860
      Mindy Mills
      Lady
      Registered On: January 8, 2021
      Topics: 5
      Replies: 66
      Has thanked: 116 times
      Been thanked: 374 times

      Why categorize yourself? Just be the person that makes you happy. I believe there is way too much pressure and stress on people these days to categorize ones self and others. Personally I don’t try to fit into a category, I’m my own unique person and so are you. I think if we want to categorize ourselves I would call it being a free spirited. It’s the only category that is appealing in my mind.

    • #433854
      Ria Freichuk
      Lady
      Registered On: June 6, 2020
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 103
      Has thanked: 271 times
      Been thanked: 437 times

      I am a girl in the wrong body. Physically male; mentally and emotionally all girl. Prefer to be dressed as a woman.

       

    • #433852
      Birel Galanodel
      Lady
      Registered On: May 3, 2020
      Topics: 5
      Replies: 57
      Has thanked: 174 times
      Been thanked: 285 times

      Thank you for all your great responses. I hope I didn’t offend anyone, I apologize if I have. Ultimately, labels shouldn’t matter. Wanting to find my place is more part of a self discovery exercise in this stage of my life.

      I am me, and I like Birel. But, I think I need to learn to rid myself of the shame that has been a part of her life for so long.

      Birel

      • #440018
        Haley Ann
        Lady
        Registered On: October 12, 2020
        Topics: 1
        Replies: 72
        Has thanked: 54 times
        Been thanked: 283 times

        Ahhh…that nasty shame. I used to be so ashamed…probably what brought on all the purges I’ve been through! But I have just finally aged to the point where I am getting more comfortable with Haley. I love seeing things through her eyes, and I love being treated like a girlfriend 😉 …it is actually pretty amazing!

        But, we live in a world of labels, and as far as that goes, how I would “label” myself has changed drastically over the last few years. The more femme and sexy Haley becomes, the more I want to explore and experience.

        Haley😘

        3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #433820
      Anne Wesley
      Lady
      Registered On: August 14, 2018
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 25
      Has thanked: 22 times
      Been thanked: 77 times

      I’m old fashioned: I consider myself a Transvestite.

    • #433787
      Charlotte Gainsbourg
      Lady
      Registered On: December 15, 2020
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 92
      Has thanked: 337 times
      Been thanked: 421 times

      Fluid Closet transgender..atm, though that may change 😂

    • #433781
      Anonymous
      Registered On:
      Topics: 58
      Replies: 1713
      Has thanked: 7773 times
      Been thanked: 9458 times

       

      I’m just Grace, who has the burden of dressing as a man for 20% of her life..and that’s bad enough.

      PLEASE don’t label me!!!!

      The only thing I want hanging around my neck….is a string of pearls.

      Grace xx

    • #433749
      Kathleen
      Duchess
      Registered On: February 20, 2020
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 164
      Has thanked: 529 times
      Been thanked: 599 times
      • #433779
        Polly Stewart
        Lady
        Registered On: January 2, 2021
        Topics: 5
        Replies: 605
        Has thanked: 751 times
        Been thanked: 1793 times

        Oh… Kathleen,

        Totally!

        xx Polly

        However, for this forum I identify as gender fluid (?) I present as either when my fancy or circumstances dictate. Even if I dress en femme more often than not I still have my bits and dress as appropriate when appropriate.

        • This reply was modified 1 month ago by Polly Stewart. Reason: added text
    • #433745
      Jennifer Lynn
      Lady
      Registered On: August 15, 2020
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 197
      Has thanked: 67 times
      Been thanked: 1022 times

      I identify as a woman. Regardless of what body parts I may have I live, feel, think, act and carry myself as a woman.

    • #433739
      Lee Ann Rakers
      Lady
      Registered On: August 18, 2019
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 596
      Has thanked: 961 times
      Been thanked: 1901 times

      Birel, I joyfully identify as transgender.

      I am not taking hormones, and I absolutely do not plan any surgical procedures. Even if I was 35 and happily divorced there would be no surgery.

      Birel, it is in your heart the way you should identify. I embrace womanhood because for me it a better place.

      Affectionately,

      Lee Ann

       

      • #434005
        Lee Ann Rakers
        Lady
        Registered On: August 18, 2019
        Topics: 4
        Replies: 596
        Has thanked: 961 times
        Been thanked: 1901 times

        Bettylou, that is an honor coming from you.

        Awesome is not a good enough word to describe you.

        There seems to be a vaccination distribution issue right now in the United States, I was wondering if you could take that on too.

        With love, affection, and a ton of respect,

        Lee Ann

        3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #433711
      Paula F
      Duchess
      Registered On: August 7, 2019
      Topics: 12
      Replies: 912
      Has thanked: 9450 times
      Been thanked: 3537 times

      I have worn so many labels in my life since I met the first person to accept and encourage me to grow within myself.  Girlfriend, FWB, CD, Transgender, Transvestite, queer, f****t, it gets werrisome trying to remember them all.  I had an epiphany several years ago when I finally realized and understood myself to a degree I never had before.  I AM ME!  Nothing more and nothing less.  If people have to stick a sign on my back while pretending to pat me there and show lip service support, it would say: TNIT– Transgender, Not In Transition!

      That would be for the people who do not or refuse to ‘ know’ me as who I really am.  The people who do, know and accept me without title ( except maybe Aunt Paula) or label, unconditionally.

      Like John and Paul said: ” I am me and you are we, and we are all together. PaulaF

      • This reply was modified 1 month ago by Paula F.
    • #433700
      Sa•man•tha
      Managing Ambassador
      Registered On: January 21, 2018
      Topics: 430
      Replies: 1750
      Has thanked: 7710 times
      Been thanked: 6967 times

      I like transfeminine.  Or even just woman.  Since I’m male bodied transfeminine seems more honest  but woman is how I think of myself.

      • #433879
        stephanie plumb
        Baroness - Annual
        Registered On: November 17, 2018
        Topics: 135
        Replies: 1675
        Has thanked: 2604 times
        Been thanked: 7388 times

        Transfeminine you mean. Apparently Transgender is the new transgender I have been informed.  The change to a capital T must have have some significance.

        Unfortunately you can’t use the “T” because it already exists in the spectrum, so you will have to get the LGBTQ+ police to assign you a new letter so it can be included. You could suggest a “*” I suppose. Or maybe a “t?” Or a 💎?

        haha , Steph 😍

        • #434308
          Sa•man•tha
          Managing Ambassador
          Registered On: January 21, 2018
          Topics: 430
          Replies: 1750
          Has thanked: 7710 times
          Been thanked: 6967 times

          Transfeminine is an identity within the trans “spectrum” so the T that’s already there will be fine for me 😉

          5 users thanked author for this post.
          • #435081
            Amanda Burton
            Baroness - Annual
            Registered On: January 15, 2020
            Topics: 22
            Replies: 1107
            Has thanked: 7778 times
            Been thanked: 4239 times

            Gosh Transfeminine, transgender, TT, This TT that. Just call me an In-betweeny, if have to label me.

            4 users thanked author for this post.
      • #433785
        Polly Stewart
        Lady
        Registered On: January 2, 2021
        Topics: 5
        Replies: 605
        Has thanked: 751 times
        Been thanked: 1793 times

        Not bad… Transfeminine! I like that.

        5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #433692
      Bobbi
      Lady
      Registered On: September 13, 2018
      Topics: 26
      Replies: 1500
      Has thanked: 1627 times
      Been thanked: 3661 times

      Not WHAT, but WHO??!! (People are not things!)

    • #433686
      Andrea Hopkins
      Lady
      Registered On: December 24, 2020
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 59
      Has thanked: 116 times
      Been thanked: 341 times

      I don’t like to put labels on anyone, myself included. I am just me I am who I am like or not.

    • #433685
      Bettylou Cox
      Duchess
      Registered On: May 26, 2019
      Topics: 18
      Replies: 1851
      Has thanked: 3430 times
      Been thanked: 6332 times

      Hi Birel,

      There is no single, simple anwer to your question; understanding the human mind is an art, not a science with cu-and-dried answers. I began my CD journey late in life, and at first,was a CD, pure and simple. Now I identify as a Trans girl, although I can’t and won’t have either surgery or hormone therapy. In my mind, I’m a girl, and we call it “socially Trans. This is a gender label, only. Sexually, I remain a hetero male, with a loving wife who accepts my dual nature. From your message, I suspect you are like me; but whatever you are, you are NOT fake, so don’t even think it – and it may change over time.

      Hugs,
      Bettylou

    • #433684
      Mary Jane
      Lady
      Registered On: September 30, 2020
      Topics: 13
      Replies: 138
      Has thanked: 257 times
      Been thanked: 727 times

      I identify as me. Happy in my own skin. I once read where someone called themselves an eclectic eccentric.

      I’ll take that label.

    • #433677
      Amy Myers
      Baroness
      Registered On: February 11, 2019
      Topics: 15
      Replies: 1209
      Has thanked: 3389 times
      Been thanked: 3213 times

      Birel, it is indeed a difficult question. Some want to do away definitions as some many times they don’t fit the complex nature of human beings. Labels are important to some, as it helps to define us, and tell us where we might fit in. So for that reason I have gone through much the same thing as you.

      Right now I am happy with calling myself as Gender Fluid, which tends to fit me. Sometimes I’m presenting as female, others I’m male. Hence Gender Fluid. If this fits you, fine, but there might be something else which fits you better, and I think that only you can make the choice.

      Amy

    • #433671
      Araminta Purdy
      Lady
      Registered On: January 23, 2020
      Topics: 6
      Replies: 318
      Has thanked: 512 times
      Been thanked: 1111 times

      Again, this is a trick question for me as it is so complex. Again, my own term is that I am an athenist. An athenist is someone who wants to be feminine and pretty. Male or female.

      Araminta.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #433670
      Brenda Lynn
      Lady
      Registered On: November 10, 2015
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 20
      Has thanked: 5 times
      Been thanked: 135 times

      Bi-gendered, two-spirited, looking at and living in the world through the eyes of each and both, comfortable in male or female mode with no desire transition or live life fully as either one.

    • #433669
      Bridgette VonSmirff
      Lady
      Registered On: October 18, 2020
      Topics: 18
      Replies: 477
      Has thanked: 7655 times
      Been thanked: 1874 times

      I think this can be a hard question for some to answer, as the definitions are poorly understood. Then there’s how di you see yourself? I’m a dude. But when I dress, I’m Bridgette. When I’m Bridgette, I think of myself as a girl. I’ve frequently got at least some underdress on, so… this can be confusing even to me, much less to try to explain to anyone else. I personally think I come down as non binary, at least as I understand it. I too have absolutely no interest or desire to transition, or be full time as a girl. I like being a dude, at least part of the time, probably most of the time. I doubt I’ve answered the question at this point, but I’ve already used to many words…

      Bridgette vS

      5 users thanked author for this post.
      • #434729
        Alexis Trickl
        Lady
        Registered On: January 15, 2021
        Topics: 2
        Replies: 6
        Has thanked: 13 times
        Been thanked: 31 times

        Ahhhhh, well….. i used to dress before because i liked the way the clothes, boots and lingerie felt like. It aroused me also, im not gonna lie about it. Then i stopped.
        The entire time i got back into it and began playing with others who dress. So ive came to terms with me being a bi crossdresser, ill play with women and ill play with other crossdressers. Recently its became more than just the feel of the clothing etc. bringing out my fem side, its being the fem side during intamacy. I like top, bottom and everything else, ive just came to realize i just like sex, all of it. I don’t care about labels, i do it for me and nobody else.

        I guess if ya had to put a label on it, id be just a bisexual crossdresser. 💋

        1 user thanked author for this post.
Viewing 58 reply threads
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.