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    • #194605

      I’m not sure if I can find the right title to this question.  It occurred to me that I liked cd because I could make myself into an artistic project.  Then I thought that cd gave me greater emotional freedom.  And there’s the feeling I get from some of what a woman feels, kinder and more compassionate.  Then I get to escape from who I am.  And I see men in different ways in cd.  So it’s both rich and confusing.  I’d love to hear from all of you ladies.

    • #194627
      Emily
      Lady

      What actually drew me was the fact that Emily is part of who I am. A large part. Like most of us, I fought that for years, only to return to the fact that I didn’t choose this, it chose me. What keeps me doing it is knowing that the time I get to be who I really am, makes me a better, more fulfilled person.

      Plus the clothes! 🤷‍♀️💅🏼💄💋👗👠

    • #194640
      Carolyn Kay
      Baroness - Annual

      I think all aspects of CD interest me because it is who I am. I am not escaping when I dress, I am simply showing another aspect of the total me. An aspect which should probably be the main part but I am to rooted in my male life to totally change now. I do feel more relax and comfortable when dressed but I am sure that this true for most.

    • #194718

      What drew me to being a crossdress right?   What draws the moth to the flame?  I remember first experimenting with wearing panties and hosiery as young child.  The feel of silk, satin, and lace were and remain hypnotic.  As matured, I purged and swore off more times than can count.  Finally, after therapy I began to understand that the need to be feminine is a part of my core being.  So, what drew me to crossdress?  The need to be me.

    • #194723
      Caty Ryan
      Baroness

      Like almost everyone here, from childhood, I loved the feel and texture of female apparel.

      And again, like almost everyone here, it has evolved into a realization that Catherine Louise Ryan is an integral part of my being and whenever  she “emerges”, it all,(clothes, hair, make up, jewellery, shoes etc etc, seems just right.

      The feeling is especially strong when as well as “all of the above” I have my “double sided tape “breast forms attached, making me feel even more like the “feminine me”.

      In addition, for the last few (cooler) months, I underdress 24/7. 18/40/105 A Bra, panties cami and 40 denier tights.

      I am able to do the above as my beloved and I do not sleep in the same room and almost on alternate nights I sleep with a bra on and my other “sticky pad” forms in the bra. They wont stay on without one, but for those few moments when I get up in the morning and take my bra off, they hang there as “natural” as can be.

      Happy dressing

      Caty

       

       

       

       

      • #194761
        Carolyn Kay
        Baroness - Annual

        Hi Caty,

        I love waking up with my sleeper wig and sleeper forms along with my full length nightgown. It is a great way to start the day. I get up slip on a satin robe and some comfy heels, put on a little makeup and jewelry then sit down for my morning coffee. If only it could continue throughout the day.

        Carolyn

    • #194740

      What drew me to be a crossdresser?When I am dressed as Michelle,I have a feeling of being complete.A very long time ago,when I was 10 years old,and the earth was covered in ice and snow<hahahahaha>,I knew something was different about me.Fast forward to later life I am very content to be dressed as Michelle whenever I can My mom and sister,s clothes always were more fun to wear and the colors were fantastic.When I am fully dressed ,it is with full makeup and the presense and easy going attitude of a woman.I am literally walking more than a mile in their shoes and I love it.

    • #194745

      This is an extremely tough poll for me. I carefully considered each of the choices provided and could not find a single one that applies to my crossdressing 100%, most not even close. And for this straight, closeted crossdresser, “Seeing men in a different way” registers at 0%. So I had no choice but to select “See my response for other.”

      The reason for my desire to crossdress has baffled me for years. And I’m not so sure that anything drew me to crossdressing, it’s more like crossdressing chose me, and I willingly succumbed.

      For this CDer, beauty was never even a remote possibility – even “passability” will forever escape me. Although I worship and admire most women, I’m not terribly interested in experiencing for myself what it’s like to be one, but I do sympathize with them. “I yam what I yam,” as Popeye used to say in the old cartoons, so “who I am” is not to be escaped from nor understood in depth.

      I don’t know what “experiencing a complete life” even means, but whatever that is, crossdressing is not the vehicle to help get me there. And as to the colours and textures, I have enough trouble coordinating a simple outfit, forget about a deep appreciation of style, elegance and beauty in women’s clothing.

      A large part of why I joined CDH was to read about the many reasons why OTHERS crossdress, and hope to distill some understanding of why I am so compelled to do it, why I cannot escape its thrall, and why I do not seem to want to.

      I’m sure I’ll pass on from this life never fully understanding why I live to dress, and dress to live.

      • #194959
        Kimmie
        Lady

        My response is very similar. I started rather young and enjoyed the feeling of the clothes, mainly pantyhose, bra and girdle, clinging to me which brought feelings of contentment. Added to that were feelings of sexual excitement. I still get both feelings today.

      • #195048
        Christy
        Lady

        Very similar. I have no idea.

    • #194747
      Anonymous

      Considering that my oldest memory about my crossdressing is from when I was maybe three or four years old, none of the options applied.

      As of what attracts me about it now, like others, it is not about men or about escaping or about being able to be me. I like to be able to transform my look into a more or less nice looking woman, and being able to at least partially experience life “from the other side of the skirt”.

      Gaby 💜

      • #194763
        Carolyn Kay
        Baroness - Annual

        Gabby,

        You have done a wonderful job of projecting who you are, who always look fabulous and comfortable in your pics. Keep enjoying who you are. Carolyn

        • #194798
          Anonymous

          Why thank you Carolyn! That was very sweet from you to say!

          *hugs*

          Gaby

    • #194749

      About ten or twelve years ago, I was in the pit orchestra for Cabaret. The orchestra is dressed in slutty over the top drag queen, but for this production, they had us simply cross dress, in what any normal woman would wear for an evening out. One night, the show had to close early because the power went out during a big storm. So, rather than deal with taking off clothing, makeup, and all the rest by flashlight, most of us just drove home as we were. I had been separated for about two years at the time, and still missed having a woman around the house. When I got home, there she was. I decided then and there that I would dress on weekends for myself, just to have a woman around the house. The more I got used to it, the more often I dressed, so now, I “underdress” all the time, and as soon as I get home from work, or from a music rehearsal or performance, the first thing I do is shed my “man clothes”, and put on women’s clothing. I like the materials, the much wider choice of colors and textures, and I like having a lady in the house, even if she is just another side of me. Those who know me really well all say I have become more gentle, forgiving and less judgmental in the past ten years or so, but just chalk it up to my ageing (I’m 74).

      • #194766
        Carolyn Kay
        Baroness - Annual

        Hi Elizabeth,

        Isn’t amazing how just one incident (dressing for the orchestra for Caberat) set off an enjoyment and fulfillment of crossdressing for you. I believe you always had a femme side and this only let you find it. You became gentle and caring not because of the clothes but because you were able to relax and be your true self.

        Carolyn

    • #194826
      Krista
      Duchess

      Thanks for the great question Jennifer, one that really made me think. For me, it has been a natural evolution. My mom always wanted a daughter and she told me so my whole life. I had a strong bond with my mom, not so much with my extremely conservative & traditional father. I grew up in a very small rural community in the late 1950s/early 60s and a couple times a month mom and I would take the bus to the big city for shopping, going to a restaurant and a movie. Thinking back, it was a “girls” day out.

      As I grew older, I tried pleasing my father doing “manly” sports (ice hockey, football) and although I was small in stature, I had enough athleticism to get by. My appearance has been quite androgynous all my life (no Adam’s apple, little body hair except lots of hair on my head).  I’ve been mistaken for female many times growing up even when I wasn’t trying to pass.

      Probably the biggest single impact for me was when my employer held a charily fundraiser and as CEO, I was expected to participate. Money was raised by staff voting on which senior manager (all men) they’d like to see dress en femme.  Secretly I wanted to win but pretended that I didn’t want to. Anyway I did win.  I went out with my executive assistant on a female clothing shopping spree and it was great fun buying lots. I had my makeup done professionally and had lots of positive feedback by the hundreds of staff who saw me at the fundraiser luncheon.

      The other big moment for me was when my mom, before she died, gave me my female name. She said if I’d been born a girl she would have named me Krista.  I loved it immediately.

      I’ll be turning 65 in a few weeks and I’m retired now for over two years so I get to dress en femme every day. It’s wonderful.  My SO knows I crossdress, though she prefers not to see me dressed or talk about it (though I do push her boundaries all the time). Hugs, Krista.

    • #194830
      Anonymous
      1. What drew me to CD, it is the feel of the clothing. Looking into a mirror and seeing that female persona and the satisfying feeling I get when dressed. I also see myself differently taking on the view of a female and imagining how others see me. I don’t always understand the feelings I just know it is wonderful and very satisfying to wear the clothes. I am very happy when dressed either in full attire or with just panties and bra underneath my clothes.
      • #196132
        Leslie
        Lady

        I could not agree with you more. The feel and look of woman’s clothes including undergarments is what I enjoy the most.

    • #194837
      Anonymous

      WOW. All of these aspects apply. The female persona is just soo much more exciting than that of a male. To experience just a few. The clothes, colors, scents, fabrics, bumps and curves, jewelry, makeup and one can only imagine, that all important piece of anatomy between their legs. WOW!

      • #195050

        The entire feel of being a woman is so much more satisfying for me than the feel of being a male.

    • #194880

      I wanted to feel more feminine and when I dress I see myself as feminine and so I feel more feminine. I think also I have a feeling to show others how feminine I can look and be.
      Sara

    • #195062
      Anonymous

      No idea really. I  always admired my sister, she was beautiful and had great taste, always well dressed. One day I was home alone and I thought I’d try some stuff on. That was it, I’d found the real me and the journey began.

    • #195798

      Hi Jennifer, great question!! i had to put ‘other’ in my answers as i started very young, single figures, in fact, long before i knew what i was doing. I have no desire to look like a woman because inside i am one all the time. I should have been born female from the start, simple!! 🙂

      Fee xxx

    • #197267
      Patty Phose
      Duchess

      I loved wearing pantyhose and showing my legs.

    • #197656
      Anonymous

      My mother wanted a girl with her second child but of course she had a boy.  When I was 3 to 4 years old I would watch her put her makeup on and she would put lipstick on me and some makeup and occasionally do my nails.  That continued for a couple of years.  I have a vivid memory of that even to this day.  I think she unknowingly started me on my CD journey.  To this day I love red  lipstick and my nails done.

      • #197703
        Carolyn Kay
        Baroness - Annual

        I had two sisters who did the same thing to me and at times, would completely dressme when I was young.

    • #200589
      Kyle Eve
      Lady

      I remember the therapist told my mother it was an escape due to my father passing. That he would grow out of it. I was young maybe about 8 or 9 years old my best friend Sara she lived down the street. We would play dress up and put on skits for her dolls. When the accident happened I stayed a Sara’s house while my mother was away. Instead of going home and getting clothes each day to wear I just shared Sara’s clothes. As we got older I would go over and she would dress me in her clothes. Before school I would go to her house and change into panties and Jean’s she picked out. Still today we will swap clothes.

    • #200625

      Well, to be brutally frank, it was underwear. From my first experiences with girls, I loved the feel (literally) of bras and knickers (and stockings!!) and the amazing variety of different styles and fabrics. I wanted to wear them myself to see how it felt (mmmmm…….silk) To this day, I still find an image of a woman in lingerie far more alluring than an image of a woman in the nude.

      Over the last 15 years or so it’s become less of a sexual thing, and more of a ‘well, the foundation is good, how about the rest of it’. So now it’s a mixture of most of the poll options, and again, the huge variety of styles and fabrics for outerwear is incredible. And if you are going that far, then the make-up, hair-styles and accessories follow.

      Lets face it, male attire is called ‘drab’ for a very good reason.

    • #210457

      For me it was one of my sisters skirts. I was home alone, it was there and I wondered what it would be like to wear it.

      The rest is history.

      45 years later and I love wearing femme clothes – and particularly skirts – more than ever.

      Take care girls.

      Anne-Marie.

    • #210593
      Anonymous

      I don’t know what drew me into crossdressing, but I found the clothes to be lighter, better-fitting and more comfortable than my “guy” stuff. And now, I want to include wigs and makeup, and I wish to successfully present as a girl. Can’t explain it, since I’m married and have no attraction to men, but there it is. I can guess it’s hormonal, but…….

      Bettylou

      • #255752

        Hi Bettylou I too think it is hormonal.I also have no attraction to men. I guess that must make us lesbiens. I am not sure.I find my self only shppping for womans clothing lately. I believe my hormones changed as i got older my feminate side seems to be mire dominate now. I must admit I love it.

    • #212524

      Ever since I was 10 or 11 years oldifwlt like I should have been female.as I grew up, I watched ppl kiss and of course in there somewhere was a few episode of porn. I always wanted to be that woman, but there’s a small problem! I would and still am interested in woman. Yes the clothes make me feel pretty and when I’m dressed then I feel amazingly calm and less stressed. I have a knack for style and can put my style together with my own sewing machine. The clothes do feel good though.

    • #212571

      Does there have to be a deep and meanigful reason?  Am I allowed to say it’s because I like it?  ‘cos I’m a bit wierd?  ‘cos it’s a life long hobby like golf or fishing?

      Could I give it up tomorrow?…probably…would I give it up tomorrow?…probably not.

      Sally x

       

      • #226525
        Anonymous

        HaHaaa if there’s a deep meaningful reason issued … I wasn’t paying attention! 11 months ago I had a fluke opportunity to try on a pair of black Stiletto ankle boots. I have no previous dressing experience. I tried my whole life to get into women’s panties NOT wear them! Yet having tried on those Stiletto heels as brought me to an 11 month crash course of the World of Femininity of which I now have collections of footwear, undergarments, skirts, blouses and dresses. I’ve been practicing my voice, movements and mannerisms. This all started with a single pair of black Stiletto ankle boots of which I can not explain how or why I felt compelled to try them on. I was 59 years old and had never worn a woman’s shoe or garments. I have no deep set expectations or reason. What I know is … as a Closet Girl, being Dressed and allowing this part of me flourish … doesn’t seem to need a reason at the moment

    • #214461

      I was just born this way I did not choose to be a crossdresser it chose me

    • #226513

      I started at a young age and I always liked males plus I married one

    • #226544
      Anonymous

      What drew me is easy: The clothes!

      I love what they look like and feel like, and the feeling I imagine when I see a woman wearing something I like is always surpassed when I track down and try on the desired garment – it’s amazing!

      It does feel like an art project now, but when I was 5 or 6, it was simply imagining what it would be like, then at 12, finally finding out (and getting aroused), experimenting with costumes, which wasn’t sexually but artistically exciting, and now with fashion looks that suit me as a person.

      Not a woman, a person who wears dresses, etc.

      Love Laura

    • #226669

      What a great question!  I used to watch my mom getting dressed and loved what I saw.  I just had to try it too.  As I got older my feminine side came out more and more.  I loved the clothes and the colors and the soft flowing fabrics.  Ohh, so many to choose from.  A vast difference from those drab male things.

      Alice

      • #233530
        Anonymous

        I started too by watching my mom getting dressed. I loved seeing her in a slip and stockings. I also loved how the material felt so one day when she was away I put on her bra and a pair of panties and a slip. They were so big on my but felt wonderful. I kept a pair of her panties and an older bra in my room for quite a while and one day she found them and questioned me about why they were there. I explained how I liked the feel of the material when I put them on. I thought she would be really mad but she told me those were hers and not to take them. About a week later I found a couple pair of nylon panties and a training bra in my underwear draw. When I thanked her she said not to wear them to school but only at home. My mom was a very classy dresser and I loved her sense of style so I was hooked on how much better women’s clothes looked. I love my correct girly side!

    • #228217

      It started a long time ago when I got badly sunburned on my boat. Monday at work I was in so much pain mostly from the band of my underwear. My wife gave me a pair of nylon bikini panties to try. They sat bellow the sunburned area and that was great. I went to work with them on and even though I was in pain those panties felt incredibly sexy. The feeling of nylon against me made me feel great. That was the first time clothes ever did this to me and I loved it. I told my wife about it and she bought me some to wear. Thats what started it. I have expanded to other things and loved it. There is no doubt that most panties are far more comfortable then male underwear. The only male clothes that would make me feel anything is a custom made suit costing a couple grand. I now wear panties 24/7 I have no male underwear at all. Women should not be the only one’s to have garments that feel sexy and make you feel great and brightens your day and night. My wife has no problem with this in fact she has worn some of my jeans and leggings.

    • #232506
      Rosiebeth
      Lady

      For me it was simple….I just wanted to be beautiful.   Women have wonderfully beautiful clothes and styles that make someone feel beautiful and wanted.  I was always picked on and called ugly.  So I imagined myself a beautiful women that caught everyone’s eye.  But then I caught the bug to continue to show my feminine side because it drew me in everyday.  The combination of being girlie and pretty is too hard to resist.  I just LOVE IT.  It just speaks to my inner soul and screams with excitement.    I love you all for Bringing this out of me and sharing.

      Kisses sweeties

      Rosiebeth.

    • #232618

      I checked all of them but four in particular, sort of blended together for me….understanding more about who I am…experiencing a more complete life…feeling some of what a woman feels…emotional freedom of a woman.   They all tie in together regarding my desire to be a true woman.  What a delight it would be if a morning dawned and I woke up to being a GG.  If that happened, I wouldn’t be dressing to “create” a woman but rather I would then be dressing to “celebrate myself” as a woman.

      • #232719
        Carolyn Kay
        Baroness - Annual

        We all dream that dream. I have had dreams where I am a woman only to be greatly disappointed when I wake up. All the freedom a woman has with her wardrobe is a wonderment I may never truly know.

        • #233108

          Carolyn, although that would be a dream come true for you and me, I’m not sure that would be for everyone here.  There was a poll recently about taking a transition pill and there were some who said they would not want to lose their manjunk.  If every CDH member woke up one morning to find that they had changed into genetic females, I wonder how many would be panicking versus those of us who would be happy as could be? 🙂

    • #232842

      I always liked the way womans clothing felt. Tis much softer than male clothing. Once i started to fully dress, being very feminine in the looks department, I felt more like me.

       

      Cookie

    • #235198
      Anonymous

      The more I do this, the less certain I am of my answer. My original reply was “clothes”; but I’m finding that my feminine side wants to present full-time, and it goes beyond attire. Does this mean that I want to BE a girl, now?. Don’t know, and I hope not, because at my age, it’s never going to happen, and I would hate to finish this journey in a state of disappointment.

    • #255599

      Ever since I was a young child, I’ve had a fascination and attraction to women’s clothes, especially dresses. The slinky material and lovely styles of the 70s&80s peaked my imagination and curiosity as I was growing up. I wanted to feel how the hemline of a dress moved when a woman would walk. Actually at age 8 or 9; it was finding 3 pairs of nylon panties in my grand aunt’s spare dresser and asking if I could try them on, that gave me my first experience wearing women’s clothes. My grand aunt allowed me to explore her closets and play “dress-up” in her dresses, panties, and slips. Even though I had to do it in secret after my grand aunt passed away in 1983; it’s something that has never left me and I did it whenever I was alone.

    • #256818

      I started because a girlfriend I had for a bit wanted to to try her bra and go to the beach. Eventually she got me to wear panties and try her dresses on since we are the same size. We would go to Disney and I would bring clothes for the day and then my bikini and dress for when we were done and getting food and going for a swim. I eventually got my own makeup and clothes and shaved my legs. Now I slowed down but still get my nails done and wear bras and panties.

    • #257095

      I started dressing as a teen (pantyhose mainly) because I thought it made more desirable to men.  Maybe a man might notice me, maybe it could somehow send out a signal that I was making myself available for a man.  Oh well, the thoughts and dreams of a teen boy. 🙂

      When I started dressing fully as an adult, it was same reason.

      I wanted to be more desirable to men.  Impossible to explain further, but being dressed for a man has always been a really really special feeling for me.  I don’t get much pleasure, any really, from dressing alone.  But doing it for a man is like being on rocket fuel.  Can’t get enough.

    • #257493

      Not sure – I seem to have always wanted to experience what I perceive to be a woman’s lifestyle.  I think I just adore women, and find them fascinating, and want to be like them to the extent I can.  Plus their clothes, and shoes, (Shoes!) and stockings and undies are just so sexy and fascinating.

    • #257509
      DeLora
      Lady

      To be honest I don’t really understand why I CD, I just feel that I need to. I have tried to rationalize it many different ways; it’s a stress relief, it’s a way of expressing my feminine side, it helps me relax, I like the feel and texture of the fabrics… But none of those explanations fully explains it for me. Perhaps is is just a compulsion that I have and there is no reasonable explanation. All I really know is that it is something that I have a strong need to do and if I do it with respect for myself and others it is not doing anyone any harm. It is obviously a part of who I am so I have chosen to accept it, explore it and enjoy it.

    • #257605

      It goes back to some of my earliest memories.  The feel of the clothes, particularly skirts with a silky feel to them.  The feel of them when my mon’s skirt would brush my legs and tingle.  It felt nice, but also felt a bit scary.  Or my sister’s nylon party dress.  Even when the skirt wasn’t silky, women would wear a slip underneath that was.  I also have memories of my mom cutting my fingernails or toenails,  and the broken bits landed on the skirt of her housedress.  When finished, she would just hold up the skirt, walk to the trash, and brush the cut nails in.  I thought that was pretty neat.

      When going to the barber, they would put tissue paper around my neck which tingled on my before adding on a nylon cape.  I often imagined the cape was a dress, particularly in the summertime when I was wearing shorts and the cape reached to bare skin.  To top it off, when the barber finished he would use a buzzer to clean the base of my neck.  But my spine was of just the right size that I could feel the buzzing right in my coccyx (tailbone).  It was a very weird sensation.

      These I would now recognize as sexual feelings, but at the time I had no understanding of them.  But I came to associate these pleasurable feelings with dressing in silky clothes.

      It would be much later on before I realized I enjoy dressing for the different materials, even if they weren’t silky.  But my start down this path is part of my earliest memories.  I don’t know if nature had a say, but I know for certain for me that nurture (or experiences) played a bit part,

    • #257617

      Meant to say played a big part, not bit part

    • #259050
      Hippie
      Lady

      For me it all started when I was 18 or so. My girlfriend got me a lingerie set. I put it on and I loved the colors and fabrics. Plus me like being the entertainer side of me. I have this shock and awe thing I like to do.

      Kinda if you’re going to make a scene be seen kinda deal. I’m 100% man with a beard, hairy chest and all thing going on. But I go out in public wearing satin high low ruffle slip pink ombre dress, a pair of black animal print tights and work boots.

      I crave the stares, the attention I get.

    • #259371
      Candi
      Lady

      For me, there was no particular event or experience that led me down this path. It is something that started at a very young age and gradually grew in me over time. I always felt like a kindred spirit with women and gravitated towards women’s conversations in social gatherings. Now I am male at work and female at home (most of the time). Being fem is more peaceful and pleasant.

    • #211980

      <p style=”text-align: left;”>Hi Tiffany . I was just thinking the same thing . I am getting lost in this whole thing. I am not sure what to hide any more . My feminate look or masculine look? I know one thing that is hidden every day now that i have found a comfortable way of tucking.  Luv Stephanie</p>

    • #226724

      TJ,

      Your smile must have on high.  And with seven delightful compliments you must have been floating on air.

      Alice

    • #226733

      Hi TJ,

      Wonderful suggestion.

      Alice

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