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    • #525618
      Edie Majeski
      Baroness
      Registered On: April 7, 2018
      Topics: 17
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      When I finally accepted that I am a cross-dresser and stopped resisting it back in my 40s, I suddenly felt as if I had been cheated out of my young as a cross-dresser. When I could have looked my best, I couldn’t simply because cross-dressing wasn’t well accepted back then and finding what you needed wasn’t as easy as it is today. So, yes, I wish I could be young today now that thing are easier and more accepting.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #525559
      Bettylou Cox
      Duchess
      Registered On: May 26, 2019
      Topics: 23
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      With 20/20 hindsight, I wish I had changed careers from lab to Flight medic early in my career instead of so late…and I wish I had discovered Bettylou some 30 years sooner; but it took the internet, YouTube and CDH to bring that about (I can be terribly dense about some things). But I wouldn’t change what has happened since that fine day.

      Bettylou

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    • #525549
      Carla Roberts
      Lady
      Registered On: July 28, 2021
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      The one thing I would have changed is how my kids found out about Carla. Basically, my ex outed me to them and friends, in preparation for leaving the marriage and many years. It cost me a lot in relationship with my kids and even though they know about Carla, I did not have the chance to explain myself. I would hope they might have a greater understanding of how I came to be what I am.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
      • #525614
        Katie Time
        Duchess
        Registered On: April 3, 2021
        Topics: 33
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        Hugs Carla 💕 Katie

    • #525532
      Millicent Teasedale
      Duchess
      Registered On: August 24, 2015
      Topics: 13
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      That’s a really tough question. How far back? How much knowledge do I get to retain?

      I wouldn’t want to go back and just do it all over again without knowing anything. What would be the point?

      But, how frustrating would it be to be five or six or even sixteen with the knowledge I have today and no good way to explain how I got it? And how much responsibility would be heaped on you if you went back in time as well? How frustrating would it be to have to live through Vietnam again? Or the 70s and 80s when we knew climate change was an issue but our leaders were too greedy and too ignorant to do anything about it? Or even just to know that AIDS and Covid were coming?

      It might be a nice fantasy thinking you might be able to change the world for the better, accept and proclaim you identity more effectively, and everything that goes with that. But I’m enough of a pessimist to believe it would be more frustrating than rewarding.

      And I’ve really enjoyed this life, for all its ups and downs. It would be hard to replicate all that good stuff while getting rid of the bad…

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    • #525419
      Jenny Thigh High
      Lady
      Registered On: August 10, 2019
      Topics: 7
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      Oh yes, were I a teen today, when things are so much more LGBT friendly, I would def do things differently.

      I’d be more open about dressing and pursuing men (thinking about that 8th grade gym teacher I fantasized about! lol). Maybe not full-time dress, but at least be more openly gay and androgynous.

      I like to think I’d position myself early to become a man’s trophy wife, which was always my goal, but I was too nervous to act upon it.

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    • #525415
      zeezee
      Duchess
      Registered On: November 10, 2020
      Topics: 1
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      Please take me back to pre-puberty with the wisdom I have now.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #525411
      Marti
      Baroness - Annual
      Registered On: February 5, 2019
      Topics: 33
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      Hi Katie,

      I’m tempted to say “be careful what you wish for” – remember what happened to Ayesha, the original ‘she who must be obeyed” played by Ursula Andress in the film “She”.

      My ‘what if’ reveries often include thankful ones. What if my bike engine had seized while doing a ton, instead of when I was just pootling along? What if the cops who busted me had been anything smarter than brain dead? What if I’d been caught shoplifting knickers in my youth?

      I’ll settle for having had a lucky life!

      Marti xxx

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #525382
      Effie Jayne
      Lady
      Registered On: February 7, 2021
      Topics: 31
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      I wish I had come out 20 years ago 🦋🏳️‍⚧️

      4 users thanked author for this post.
      • #525619
        Katie Time
        Duchess
        Registered On: April 3, 2021
        Topics: 33
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        Effie that’s my one big regret,not coming out sooner, my daughter is coming home from Northern California in 3 weeks. I’m hoping to have the courage at that time to tell her. Thanks to CDH and all the lovely girls here I may just be able to do it.💕💋Katie

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        • #525626
          Effie Jayne
          Lady
          Registered On: February 7, 2021
          Topics: 31
          Replies: 1096
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          All the best to you!! 🌸

    • #525380
      rebekka moore
      Lady
      Registered On: January 7, 2017
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      Probably. But there are so many things I would do or want to do over, I wouldn’t know where to start.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #525295
      Paula F
      Duchess
      Registered On: August 7, 2019
      Topics: 15
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      I would do in a heartbeat, with one stipulation, that knowledge of experiences stays intact.

      What purpose would be served by repeating most of life over again without that knowledge?

      PaulaF

      7 users thanked author for this post.
    • #525126
      Amy Myers
      Baroness
      Registered On: February 11, 2019
      Topics: 18
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      Mostly I’m pretty happy with how my life has worked out. However, like so many others have already said I do rather wish I had a way to free Amy much sooner. I don’t think I would have ever transitioned, and as Heather J said, I have a wife and grown kids I love.

      There would have been some people in my life who would of disapproved, which are gone now, however I believe my Mother would have been alright knowing she had a daughter, albeit only part time.

      That is my biggest regret, first not ever asking my Mom what girl names she had in mind, as I would have adopted that name, and then second, as I said I wish I could have let her meet Amy.

      Amy

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    • #525089
      MacKenzie Alexandra
      Ambassador
      Registered On: May 20, 2016
      Topics: 45
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      I have do not regret my life, or how it had unfolded. I would be lying, however, if I did not admit that I am curious how my life may have been different had I been honest with myself and my parents when I was outed as a teenager.  Being naive and scared, I responded how I thought was expected, which resulted in burying my feelings for more than 2 decades.

      MacKenzie Alexandra

    • #525030
      Stephanie Kennedy
      Princess
      Registered On: March 15, 2019
      Topics: 19
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      Has thanked: 7847 times
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      Hi Katie I stopped with the” what ifs” in my life. I am going to focused on “what is” and how its going to be. They have stolen the description of my life to make a movie!!! The GOOD, BAD and the UGLY. I am going call my lawyer I may be owed residuals. Do you think Clint can help me? or should I say would help me? I have earned every line on this pretty face. NO more what IFS

      Luv Stephanie

      9 users thanked author for this post.
      • #525316
        Katie Time
        Duchess
        Registered On: April 3, 2021
        Topics: 33
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        Ultimately your completely correct, we have to move forward and live true to ourselves 💕💋 Katie

        1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #525025
      Heather Jameson
      Duchess
      Registered On: April 1, 2019
      Topics: 10
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      This question which I’ve pondered so many times tears me apart. The one half of me yells yes, I’d turn it back to my teens and transitioned then and lived my life as the woman I should have been but the other half says yes but you wouldn’t have a great wife, 4 great kids and soon to be 9 beautiful grandkids. There’s no question, way too much to lose there.

    • #525021
      Beth T
      Lady
      Registered On: February 2, 2021
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 18
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      I would love to turn back the clock on my body, if I could keep the experience and the self-knowledge I have now. If that’s not an option, then I choose to move forward from where I am now.

      7 users thanked author for this post.
    • #524953
      Anonymous
      Topics: 0
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      Apart from my love of crossdressing I wouldn’t change a thing, living in a very small village in England I enjoyed school , loved motorcycling and still do, ( it’s a miracle in still alive) spent 10 years as an engineer, but always wanted to be an international truck driver, took my heavy goods vehicle test in 1973, and my dream had come true , spent the next 40 years driving 44 tonne trucks all over western Europe. For weeks at a time I would be away from home the main  reason I never got married. Retired now for 7 years and love every minute of it,  I’ve had a fantastic life its been amazing,

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      • #525392
        Jill Quinn
        Lady
        Registered On: July 24, 2021
        Topics: 1
        Replies: 64
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        It sounds like you had a fantastic life! Thanks for sharing.

        Hugs, Jill

    • #524935
      Wendy Swift
      Lady
      Registered On: May 11, 2020
      Topics: 6
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      If it was just turning back the clock, I would have sought further medical attention when a doctor discovered things were not right with my health.  Instead, I took the macho man approach and tried to just sweep it under the carpet.  Years later, I have to deal with the ups and downs of my current treatment.

       

      7 users thanked author for this post.
    • #524930
      Stevie Steiner
      Ambassador
      Registered On: June 11, 2020
      Topics: 57
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      Regrets, I have a few.  I think we all do and would love to go back and undo the bad  things in our lives.  A person with no regrets has led a dull life, or is incredibly blessed, I’ve always thought.

      Realizing how much happier and content I am now with myself and my life, I wish I had allowed my real self to come out 30 years ago.  I missed out being able to enjoy being me for so much if my life.  Would have made life more worth living.

      Stevie

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    • #524924
      Jin Crocker
      Lady
      Registered On: November 15, 2019
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 420
      Has thanked: 29 times
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      I would not have sold the ’53 Chevy pickup.

      I would be more careful with alcohol consumption.

      I would have sought more post-Vietnam counseling.

      7 users thanked author for this post.
      • #525399
        Jill Quinn
        Lady
        Registered On: July 24, 2021
        Topics: 1
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        Jin,

        I want to thank you for your service. I for one appreciate our Vietnam veterans.

        Love and respect, Jill

        1 user thanked author for this post.
        • #525526
          Jin Crocker
          Lady
          Registered On: November 15, 2019
          Topics: 4
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          Has thanked: 29 times
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          Thanks Honey, it means a lot to be recognized. All of us Vietnam vets suffer from the “Rodney Dangerfield syndrome.”

          2 users thanked author for this post.
          • #525536
            Jill Quinn
            Lady
            Registered On: July 24, 2021
            Topics: 1
            Replies: 64
            Has thanked: 275 times
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            My dad served there too and can certainly understand what you’re saying. I think it took the the children of Vietnam vets to show the first real gratitude for what you all went through, and that’s too long.

            Hugs, Jill

            1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #524863
      Val’sheril Starsong
      Lady
      Registered On: March 3, 2019
      Topics: 10
      Replies: 383
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      I’ll have to admit, your question threw me for a loop for a bit. Since the differences between a fountain of youth and turning back the clock are myriad and profound. I mean let’s be honest, who wouldn’t wish to regress their aging bodies back to the prime of health and beauty, especially now we’ve come to grips with our “special hobby” and gotten quite good at it?

      Still though, the question as it stands is less about eternal youth and more about regrets and things we would have done differently. I likely would have given myself full acceptance as I am decades sooner, since I’ve spent far too much of my life living in guilt and shame over Val’s presence in my life. I would have stopped trying to find the “right woman” and realized that maybe I’m okay as a self-actualized person without a SO in my life, that maybe celibacy is something to be celebrated and not feared. And I definitely would have fed my artistic side more instead of falling into the “work to survive” loop.

      But hey, those are all things I can change in the years to come!

    • #524859
      Grace Scarlett
      Baroness - Annual
      Registered On: February 16, 2021
      Topics: 120
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      Katie.

      While my life is far from perfect, I wouldn’t change too much. The “downs” make us stronger people and to change things could have started a ” snowball effect “…..be careful what you wish for.

      No  ” Back to the Future” for me…

      Grace xx

      • #525024
        Katie Time
        Duchess
        Registered On: April 3, 2021
        Topics: 33
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        Has thanked: 1771 times
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        Oh believe me Grace i wouldn’t change much mostly just wish I could have experienced my true self more freely in the younger body I once had.  Most of my life has been great, apart from some very dark transgressions against me.  And I wouldn’t trade the world for my daughter. 💕💋Katie

        4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #524839
      Michelle Brown
      Registered On: August 23, 2015
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 99
      Has thanked: 93 times
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      I would have been more assertive in high school ,would have stayed in the Army,got out at 50 with a pension and lived 24/7 as a woman ,whether my parents and relatives accepted it or not.I would have loved to attend college as Michelle.

      8 users thanked author for this post.
    • #524787
      Bridgette VonSmirff
      Lady
      Registered On: October 18, 2020
      Topics: 39
      Replies: 1311
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      My current wife and I dated ask through high school and my first year or two in the Navy. Then we had a fight and didn’t speak for 26 years. We each accumulated at least one ex and at least one kid. I wish there was a way to go back and fix that mistake, but the kids we have… so, no, there’s no going back. How I’d love to have the years together that we missed though… she’s my Dream Baby.

      Bridgette

    • #524770
      Alison Anderson
      Duchess
      Registered On: October 15, 2018
      Topics: 8
      Replies: 583
      Has thanked: 374 times
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      I gotta go against the tide.  I’ve seen the so-called butterfly effect (or if you will, chaos theory), how small seemingly inconsequential decisions can lead to very big changes.  For example, what if I remembered to take the clothes I packed to the beach so I could go shopping on the way home?  Or what if I spent one minute less or one minute more watching my daughter play a video game after changing at home before heading out shopping?  In either case I wouldn’t have been at the location and time where I had a car accident.

      What if I started crossdressing years earlier?  Then I wouldn’t have met many of the people I know.  I wouldn’t have been there for a friend I met because of this in her time of need.

      What if I told my spouse earlier about my crossdressing?  We may have divorced earlier, or never have married.  So what happens to my kids?  Taken to the absurd, what if you made love with your spouse one minute earlier or one minute later, and a different sperm “won the race?”   Your kids (or you, if we are talking about your parents) wouldn’t be the same person.  What if my spouse tried even a little bit to work on our marriage?  Then I probably wouldn’t have gone for my first makeover and done any of the things I did the past almost 12 years.

      My Mom used to tell me that we could have been rich, because her father invented 6-Up.

      I can’t possibly see the consequences of changing even the smallest of things.  To change something major in my past?  I couldn’t even begin to tell you the consequences.  Are things perfect?  Far from it.  Still, I’m not going to play the “what if” game.

      • #525412
        Jill Quinn
        Lady
        Registered On: July 24, 2021
        Topics: 1
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        Has thanked: 275 times
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        Alison,

        I was thinking pretty much the same thing. A slight change now can have monumental consequences later on. We’ve all struggled in our lives, but here we are. Trying to enjoy our lives now, and hopefully, trying to be better, kinder, more compassionate  people whether en femme or not.

        Hugs, Jill

        1 user thanked author for this post.
      • #525026
        Katie Time
        Duchess
        Registered On: April 3, 2021
        Topics: 33
        Replies: 265
        Has thanked: 1771 times
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        I know exactly what you mean,  you have to take the bad along with the good.  The Joker made batman, and vise versa. So knowing today how my life has progressed we have to say it had to be the way it was. Including the abuse that I suffered, sadly. 💕💋

        4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #524754
      Cassie Jayson
      Duchess
      Registered On: September 29, 2019
      Topics: 27
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      I keep thinking what if myself. If I had REALLY gotten into CD when I was doing it in 1980 to 82 then I would not have married my wife and had 3 wonderful kids. I suppose it is possible that I would have married someone else, but that may have gone worse than the marriage I did have. Maybe I should go back to raise my kids differently, then my oldest would not have gotten pregnent during spring break her senior year. But then I wouldn’t have my 2 wonderful great grand children.
      As you can see almost everything I can think of maybe changing would likely result in some other negative thing happening for me or another loved one.
      . . Sandy

    • #524741
      Beth Green
      Lady
      Registered On: February 24, 2021
      Topics: 27
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      We all want “do overs”. Several things I would change. I should have stayed in the military. I should have married that flaming hot red head in Germany instead of that ______ back home. Of course I would have had to stay in the closet because of the military but after a 30 year career I could retire and do as I wish, meaning fully out and living as a woman. I know the red head would accept it, I am still in contact with her and she loves the idea of us being girlfriends. She is married to a rocket scientist (really!) who works for the ESA on joint missions with NASA. She travels the world with him but they have never had a reason to stop in flyover land.

      If I had retired from the military after 30yrs I would have plenty of years left and enough money to do a complete transition. I also would have avoided dead end civilian careers, bankruptcy and legal problems.

      Ahh, what if.

      Beth

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    • #524731
      Stephanie Green
      Lady
      Registered On: June 26, 2021
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 112
      Has thanked: 75 times
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      There are many things that I would do differently if I could go back and change them.  However, I don’t dwell on the past.  Dwelling on the past leads to regrets.  Regrets age people.

    • #524715
      Michelle McQueen
      Lady
      Registered On: June 14, 2021
      Topics: 12
      Replies: 404
      Has thanked: 1511 times
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      What if??… hmmm…. If I could have a do over I would have NOT gone back to my hometown after military service and would definitely NOT have gotten married. These two decisions would have altered my life completely and I believe for the better. Dreams…. sigh… but we can never go back.

    • #524698
      Donna
      Lady
      Registered On: January 17, 2021
      Topics: 127
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      without a doubt if had to change things back in younger years would have done my transition awhile back. As for career wouldn’t change that due to being a woman.  Do admit have messed things up in past would fix those just to be more at ease.  Suppose if was a woman earlier on maybe my dream of being married to a great husband with couple kids and a loving wife.

      Donna

    • #524694
      Yumi Okada
      Lady
      Registered On: July 15, 2021
      Topics: 16
      Replies: 67
      Has thanked: 183 times
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      For me, coming out as gay has been a fountain of youth. I feel and act the 27, I never really was. I mean I do have chronic health issues, but they don’t slow me down. Even before coming out to myself, I decided I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. Enough so, that I dropped my insulin by nearly 2/3rds.

      8 users thanked author for this post.
    • #524693
      Bobbie W
      Lady
      Registered On: May 18, 2021
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 33
      Has thanked: 104 times
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      Yes in a second, I have made many mistakes in my life and would love a do over.

      8 users thanked author for this post.
    • #524692
      Angela Booth
      Lady
      Registered On: August 1, 2020
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 263
      Has thanked: 337 times
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      I have often wondered about the ‘What if’. To have done any of the things I could have done would change the future. Would it be for the good or bad? 

      I have made mistakes and achieved things that I am proud of – I am at a nice place now and wouldn’t change things.

    • #524684
      Laura Lovett
      Lady
      Registered On: March 26, 2020
      Topics: 29
      Replies: 1362
      Has thanked: 4233 times
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      I would cross dress, as my heart commands, take all the insults, knowing that, over time, they would stop, and hope, hope, hope that when I eventually met my wife, she would be the same person, and still love me for who I am, not what I like to wear 😊😍🤗

    • #524681
      Abbie Normal
      Duchess
      Registered On: June 13, 2021
      Topics: 10
      Replies: 472
      Has thanked: 835 times
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      If I could return to my body at the age of around 19-20 but even up to about 30 with all my experiences intact, I would absolutely go for it. I definitely feel like my youth was wasted, I know way more about what I want and how I want to live now but the energy is not what it was.

    • #524671
      Anonymous
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 0
      Has thanked: 0 times
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      Yes, I would turn back time and transition when I was much younger. I would also pick a different career and a different path for my life.

      • #524683
        Abbie Normal
        Duchess
        Registered On: June 13, 2021
        Topics: 10
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        Has thanked: 835 times
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        Hi Eva,

        I was just having a conversation about this with my wife yesterday. I think I probably would have transitioned if I was young in the current climate of acceptance (compared to the 80’s) but my life would have been completely different for sure. I probably could also use a different career though the one I’m in now has been good to me. I’m currently in my 3rd career but I’d switch careers one more time at least if I was younger.

         

        — Abbie 🥰

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