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to me it’s a compulsion
I wish I could answer this question! I don’t know why I started but I do like the soft silky feel of female clothes (especially lingerie) against my body.
I absolutely love everything about it. The look and feel of the clothing, the look and feel of wearing sexy underwear, high heels, my breast and wigs and makeup. Plus it takes away the roughness of feeling like a man. I explore and feel my female side as much as I can. I really have a different way of looking feeling about everything in life. if I was a lot younger I would seriously consider transitioning and right now I am considering finding a relationship with a man. I would love to be sexy, alluring and desirable.
I have dressed on and off since early teen years, and I love the way the clothes feel and make me feel, it is also very relaxing, and a break from the daily grind as a man. I love to feel feminine and pretty, just need to learn how to make the outside match what the inside is feeling, love to all you lovely ladies out there and stay safe.
If only I knew the answer to that, it would be so much easier explaining my self to others.
I know I feel better mentally when I dress regularly.
If I don’t dress for a week or 10 days I have an overwhelming need to dress.
I do not hate my male clothes and I am comfortable with my male body, I just also feel comfortable being a bit more feminine.Lucinda, that’s pretty much impossible for me to say for sure. I can give some reasons though! I love the look and feel of the clothes, and they can make me feel something that no male clothes can, a feeling of sexiness, and attractiveness.
As a male I’ve never thought of myself as an attractive guy, maybe that’s just a long standing insecurity stemming from when I was younger, and the “jocks” always seemed to get to pretty girls, and I was left out.
Last year I started going out, and I simply love getting dressed, even in plain jeans and a stop to go to the mall (when we could do that!), but even better is too get totally dolled up to go to a private party in some short skirts!
Though the real reason why I first started, I really don’t know. Something buried deep inside me I suppose.
Amy
I agree with all the girls, there is not just a right and unique answer, there are a multiples factors that encourage those desires that make us a special person, beautiful women, sexy and feminines…
kisses a lot to all my girly friends
Lucinda, I wanted to add a couple of things.
I’ve never really felt I was born in the wrong body, though there were times through my teen years that I did envy the girls, I thought they had a better world, being feminine. I realized much later that many of them envied us boys, though I don’t know why. A bit of the old “grass is greener” thing I guess.
Now I feel like I could live most of my time in women’s clothes, if I were brave enough to cross all those bridges I’d need to actually do it. Though I wonder what would happen after a few months of living the life as it were, I started to long for the simplicity of my male garb.
Just don’t know the answer to that either.
The other thing, and a poster put this out on the forum here sometime last year, “Would you still dress if all you had were Soviet era clothes and underwear?”. Interesting thoughts, and after some thinking, I believe my answer is a definite YES! Of course I love the short and sparkly outfits, check out some of my recent pictures, where I can show off my legs, but I’d still dress if I only had the plain vanilla stuff to wear.
Nothing we say ever seems to answer the “Why”, does it? We just do, and are what we are.
So I don’t know if my post is of any help to anyone.
Amy
I find it’s a need in me to dress up, the more i dress up the more it calm’s the (beast) in me, not that I’m saying that I’m a beast, everything is a lot calmer and serene when I’m Rozalyne less chaotic everything is in perspective, if i could be Rozalyne 24/7 i think i could be a better person xxxxx
Hi Lucinda,
I cannot disagree with anything any of the other ladies posted here, so I can only add to the growing list. I don’t know of a simple answer.
To me, it’s almost like an addiction. When I am not Lisa, I can’t wait to dress again. When I start there is exhilaration and anticipation. When I am in full mode,there is a sense of peace, control, and contentment with who I am. When I look back a pictures, all I want to do is improve. But it is more than just the feel of the clothes.
I never felt like I was born in the wrong body, and happy with my male side, but it’s an inner need. And the male side of me does feel embarrassed when that blue undertow comes along.
I have often wondered if its nature or nurture…or a combination of both that brings out this inner need and the pink cloud.
Whatever it is, I need that side of me, and it makes me happy.
Hugs,
Lisa
My reason for dressing,which goes back many,many years
is my lack of affection from a women,I love women,if I was
a women i’d be a lesbian.
I’ve been married for a long time & get no love or affection from my SO
so when I shave my body & put nylons & high heels with sexy lingerie,& see my painted toes in the shower I can feel like the women that is missing in my life.
Does anyone else see themselves this way?
I voted both ‘yes’ and ‘no’. It depends on what point in my life we are looking at. The ‘no’ answer is because at the beginning, once my sister had dressed me that first time, I just knew it was ‘right for me’. I was too young for it to be sexual and really didn’t understand why I didn’t fight being dressed up, as most boys would have I think. But the continuing of doing it was just something I knew was what I was supposed to do, even though somehow I understood that letting my mom see me in a dress would be seen as wrong. I think that comes from my sister urging me to not let our mom see me dressed, that it was a secret only for me and the other girls in our Barbie group.
When I started through puberty, the ‘Yes’ answer would apply. I HAD to be dressed as a girl as much as I humanly could. It made me feel the best I could, mentally and emotionally, but it was still just as important to keep it secret then too, the mid 70’s. I was almost caught several times by family and non-family, but barely was able to either hide or get undressed with lightning speed.
Then came my first ‘crush’. I didn’t have a clue as to why I needed for him to see me dressed as Paula, but something told me I needed to let him see and that I had to let him know, somehow, that I was attracted to him.
After I matured, I simply accepted how and who I was, and the rest of the world could be da***d. I was who I was and I was going to be that person. The clothes didn’t make me want to be her, although I felt much more comfortable in women’s clothes than I did in male drab.
The revelation that I was a victim of one of ‘nature’s cruel jokes’ of being in the wrong body slowly dawned on me after seeing my first counselor and voraciously reading everything I could get my hands on about CD’ing, TG, and Ts. In my mid 20’s, I finally met and fell in love with myself, as I was and still am to this day. The final answer will be when I work out if I would be happier to have full transition, or to just be me as I am now, which is happy.
PaulaF
I seldom dress up, so it has not ever felt like a routine or a lifestyle. It is always thrilling.
The few times as a child that I tried on my mother’s bra or pantyhose was exciting but I do not think I wanted to be so much like a girl but to experience my mother’s femininity. I suspect I did not do it often because as a youth there are so many new adventures awaiting and besides I was afraid I might get caught and punished. Even though no one ever told me not to wear mom’s undergarments, I felt the pressure of conforming to societal norms so my parents would not get angry.
In my 20’s, on occasion I would grab items from the hand-me-downs that neighbors gave my mother. These included blouses, pants and panties that could almost pass as men’s wear. Wearing these clothes brought to the surface some of my latent homosexual identity, but as even as I enjoyed that I also began to repress those feelings again. I enjoyed the clothes for a while, but I was having sexual intercourse with women, so I purged.
In my 30’s, I started buying my own lingerie and it was driven by erotic impulses. It started all of a sudden when I went to a discount clothing store looking for men’s wear and happened to spot a gorgeous corset across the floor at a ridiculously low price. Then I started buying panties, a garter belt and stockings. Once I had a complete outfit, I dressed for my best male friend, with whom I had sex sometimes. He was not at all interested, so I started to dress alone, look in a full-length mirror, lift up my skirt and masturbate. That was hot. I also had a steady girlfriend and was trying to figure out how to tell her in the hopes that she would be supportive and help me dress, but I never worked up the courage.
Now I am in my 60’s and what inspires me to dress up is my bringing home a new piece of wardrobe. I enjoy looking in a mirror and seeing how the outfit transforms my figure, and I also enjoy the feel of the bra around my chest and back and the stockings on my legs. It is not an erotic drive anymore and I do not masturbate, although I do sometimes fantasize about someone feeling my butt or riding his or her legs along my stockings and up my skirt. Alas, I do not have any close female friends anymore and so I have been telling a few more male friends about my dressing up and none have been supportive or encouraging. This is also why I do not dress up often; I feel quite lonely when I dress up.
Perhaps the “wanna feel girlish” experience has not really been a major factor in my dressing up. I have never wanted to shave my beard or body, paint my nails or wear make-up, or embellish my femininity with jewelry, earrings, perfumes or heels. I have never seriously considered trying to pass as a woman. Maybe the link between all the adventures I have had in wanting to dress in women’s garments has been a varying balance of the adventure of experiencing a lower level of femininity with a little bit of eroticism.
My reason for dressing,which goes back many,many years
is my lack of affection from a women,I love women,if I was
a women i’d be a lesbian.
I’ve been married for a long time & get no love or affection from my SO
so when I shave my body & put nylons & high heels with sexy lingerie,& see my painted toes in the shower I can feel like the women that is missing in my life.
Does anyone else see themselves this way?
Hi Danelle,
Dont feel like this now, as I have a loving SO, (tho “things” could do with a bit of improvement!!).
But I digress!!
For almost 30 years I was in a marriage just like yours. The last half was sheer misery. She hated my CD’ing with a passion and there little or no affection coming my way. So when I could be Caty I “made love to her” in the mirror and my mind…
Then when I met my wonderful new SO, for quite a few years, I felt like a reformed drug addict, I did not “need” to be Caty so she “went to sleep” for a few years. But as we all know, “it comes back” and with me a (lovely) vengeance!!
Caty is me and I am Caty for at least half of my day. (Underdressed and thinking about what I have on under my “day drab” then under my “night drab”. Escpecially with my “sticky” breast forms that allow me to sleep braless.
Hang in there
Caty
Great question I don’t think there’s a really an answer for it I believe we were born this way why do I love to wear feminine clothings and act like a girl I don’t know I have ever since I put on my mom’s pantyhose at 5 years old I’ve always wanted to dress like a woman and act like a woman like I said I don’t think any was no the answer I just only thing I could say is we were born this way
Hey Lucinda. As you acknowledge not really a yes / no question.
The short answer is that non of us really knows the core reason why we want to dress-up.
Some of us point to feelings that we were born in the wrong body. Others feel that it’s the tactile feel of the clothes whilst for some it’s a sexual thing. There are probably as many answers as there are stars in the sky and each one of them having validity and I would guess that for many of us out story has a perplexity of reasons as to why.
I can remember the first time I wore a pair of my sister’s knickers. It was very traumatic and short lived. I was about 6years old and hated the experience.
Fast forward to age 11 and my trying on one of sisters knee length skirts. The rest is history. I didn’t have any thoughts of feeling like a girl or wanting to be one at that time – that was to come. It – the skirt – was just there. I had the opportunity and a deep desire of wanting to know a that it would be like to wear that skirt. Little did I know where that simple act would lead.
So for me the genesis was a question and the chance to answer it.
These days though, it is far more complex. All the usual suspects are present be if feeling sexy, feeling (what I think it would be like to be) womanish, feeling a sense of sisterhood, the touch of silly lingerie against my skin, the feel of sheer stockings over new shaved legs, the way I like the look of being dressed, the peace it brings to me, the relief from my stressful life, feeling like dressing takes my along the path to become a woman and that’s something I increasingly desire.
Take care girls.
Anne-Marie
My best guess at the moment is that it started during childhood. My best friend as I was starting kindergarten was a girl,who loved a couple houses down. At some point during time, we began playing doctor. I have no memory of exactly how or when we stared, but we continued that activity for a few years, growing rather bold in that we found places to play in which we could both be naked.
Looking back, it was quite sexualized, at the time, neither of us knew anything about sex. When we stopped playing, perhaps growing out of those activities, I missed the closeness.
Here is where the guess work comes in. I think I started dressing in my mother’s clothes to “recreate” the feelings of closeness with a female that I had lost. Being dressed gave me both serenity and sexual excitement. Now, who would not want to feel those feelings?
I was an only child and close to my mother. She was a strong woman and it was pre tights, when women all wore stockings with suspenders. I would help my mother dress-sometimes doing up rear suspenders.
I became obsessed with stockings and started taking hers to my bed at night and wearing them. I was probably about 8 at the time, so no masturbation and certainly no ejaculation.
I was discovered by my father, wearing a pair of stockings in bed, but I explained I was cold and they kept my legs warm. He accepted that and I continued.
So this was continually re-enforced and I began to imagine strong women, in high heels, walking all over my body, whilst I wore lingerie.
At the time-very late 50s- the main erotic magazines available were Beautiful Britons and Spick and Span. These two specialised in upskirt photos, or coy ladies lifting their skirts to expose panties and suspenders. I became old enough to masturbate and I think that this lingerie fetish just transitioned to my wishing to be fully dressed as a lady.
I have dressed ever since-but only recently going out en femm, as I am lucky enough to have found a lady who is as turned on as me by my habit-and will join in.
I started young, around 10 or 11 with me wondering what it felt like to have stockings on my legs. One day while I was home alone I got up the nerve to try on a pair of Moms and her girdle. I remember how fantastic it felt. 55+ years later it still feels fantastic. I just love how it feels to wear women’s clothes. I like to feel feminine. It’s not really a hobby but more of a mind set. While I don’t wish to transition I would like to experience having a real women’s body for a day. Wish I could dress more fully and more often. So I guess my simple answer to why is….I just like to.
Peace and getting rid of stress . I had a older sister that wanted to be a beautician when she grew up and she would work on me . My mother was kind but the only thing she cared about was if my father was happy. He hated his job and was a bastard and he liked my older bother more than me . So what makes me want to be a woman is being pretty and being at peace and feeling safe . Thanks girls stay safe and well and be what makes you happy
When I first started, it was the feeling of the clothing. Particularly if it was something silky. And back in the day, even when it wasn’t there would be a silky slip or half slip. It was definitely a turn on for me, as it made me tingle from a very young age.
Later I also liked the way a skirt or dress looked. Ir’s in our genetic makeup to be attracted to things that are smooth and symmetric. The reason the typical image of a black cat on Halloween with it’s fur standing out at odd angles is ugly and scary is the exact opposite of this phenomenon. To me there is beauty to the smoothness of a skirt.
Now, in addition, I am more relaxed when I’m dressed. It just “feels right.” I love the different types of skirts, from A line to pencil, from short to long, and how they move when I move, caressing me as it brushes against my legs as I walk.
What makes me want to dress up is the knowledge that once I am fully dressed up, the touch of long hair by wig along my neck and down my back creates pleasant sensations inside me. Household chores are more pleasant when I’m dressed up. Maybe because doing those chores makes me do different things that create new stimulations. Without dressing up, in the same long hair wig alone I look freakish.
Wearing new and more varied things is more fun. Even for chores I accessorize with bracelets and a necklace.
I was definitely born in the wrong body. It took me years to figure myself out and find some inner peace away from the torment in my mind. I don’t dress everyday but when I look in a mirror I’m looking at Heather.
For no reason whatever, I am overcome with an uncontrollable feeling of wanting to look and feel pretty, to act and be Feminine. To look at myself wearing a pretty, frilly pastel dress with heels. Lovely Lingerie so soft, flowing and sweet.
To feel tender and vulnerable, desiring a wonderful girl to girl relationship with a Pretty Female.
The delicious, elevating sensual energy!
Plus it makes me hor ny.
love of female underwear
<p style=”text-align: center;”>Yes , I can only Imagine i was born a male for a reason , but know one ever explained to me exactly what that reason was or is … lol .. my male body and the strength that it possesses , has helped to serve protect and Save many people throughout my life I’m sure most were very grateful I was who I was . Or maybe the answer was more simple , to be father to my son .. But with that having been said I’ve always had an impulse ,a desire, a need to dress like a girl since my earliest memories of childhood I’ve always thought there was some kind of big misunderstanding , kind of like I must have stood in the wrong line at childbirth , I have never wanted anything more in my life than to just be a woman it is always just kind of felt right , I still feel that way</p>
I wouldn’t call it dressing up. To me dressing up. Is putting on my Sundays best for chruch.
To me its more of a fashion statement. I wear womens clothing because I like how I can wear it with my beard and make it work for me.
I have this whole macho thing going on. Don’t mess with me. I know this is going to sound weird as hell. But some how I feel like a powerful punk rocker when wearing. I don’t feel more girly or feminine. It kinda the reverse for me.
Its just hard to explain.
good post. thanks for sharing. I love dressing up in female clothing as they want to call it. woman do have the pretty things to wear, satin or silk panties, lacy bra;s, colorful nylons, make up and great smelling perfume, nice dangle ear rings, nail polish, heels. pretty dresses, sexy skirts. in which is all a pair of shorts, a blouse is a shirt. I have more female cloths then male cloths. I even under dress during the winter, some times I even undress during the spring time
I can’t give a specific reason as to what makes me want to dress, but I can tell you it is the sensual feeling of the soft fabrics against my skin the slight and sometimes not so slight constriction from some of the garments. The look of the different colors and textures that I look down and see on me when I am dressed.
AAlso it is escape for me, I am looked to be the strong, confident decision maker/problem solver. Always with a level head and a plan. It allows me to slip out of that role for short time. It allows me to be the venerable one, which I think that my dressing is triggered by stressful times and situations.
I get an intense desire to be feminine, which drives my interest in dressing as a woman. Over the years that desire has never gone away and seems to growing in intensity. I have also evolved in my dressing from being interested in looking like a girl to being committed to be a girl when dressed. This has influenced me in how and how often I dress. I’ve had the opportunity to date a man on a few occasions and have been a women with them. It is so very femininely affirming for me!
Plus…what sort of pin head puritanism doctrine in the 19th century decided henceforth for evermore that only women shall wear high heels, lace, petuli and lavender, ,akeup, rouge, silk, pink and pastel shades, long curled hair, jewellry?
Huh?
Aren’t we all just getting back to where we once belonged?
great post about the 19th century, who said woman wear female clothing and males wear male clothing? woman get to wear the silky, satin, nice fitting clothing, colorful dress, skirts, wear perfume and make up and ear rings and paint their nails. what the heck. so why can’t us girls wear the sexy clothing? woman wear manly clothing and nothing is said about that and they walk around like they are manly. so we will dress in female clothing and show the real woman how to dress and act. we look really pretty as woman and most are very pretty and passable where you could not tell . now days we have woman marrying woman and men marring men, so why not dress up and feel like a woman and be free and happy. i dress up when i can and feel great about my self, i even under dress a lot during the winter time.
I don’t think this question really has an answer.
If we reply “I like the feel of the clothes” for example, then why do we like the feel of the clothes? What compels us to feel that way?
If we say “It is a compulsion”, then why is it a compulsion?
Basically we are one question away from one that we cannot answer. My guess is that there is something different about us at a fundamental level. After all, do we know why people are gay or bisexual? No we don’t? Crossdressing and transgenderism are no different…
I really don’t know why… i can go a few weeks or months, and even a year or so without dressing and then one day i wake up and NEED to dress. It comes from DEEP Down inside of me. And it is NOT a sexual thing, or a kink, or whatever you want to call it BUT a Deep NEED to dress. Never understood it and probably never will.
Jennifer
Myself I just love seeing myself all dolled up. Makes me very happy. Honestly I am more confident & comfortable dressed to the 9’s than being a man. The day just seems so much better. As a male nothing really happens. When I am all dolled up. Everyone says hello. Guys hold doors open for me. I even get compliments from older people. One time a elderly couple were behind me at the store. I had a lot of items. I told them go in front of me. The elderly lady said to me. You were surely brought up properly young lady. She said your a sweetheart…. I just felt so amazing. I said. Awe….thank you…
Laura raises an excellent point. Look back in history relative to what men were wearing and, in many cases, using extensive make-up? Is cross dressing really that different from then to now? There have been so many major social changes in the past 20-30 years, maybe there will be a time when we “ladies” will be considered perfectly acceptable out in public.
Hello
I just dolly up nearly everyday. Unless my girlfriend needs male me for something. But when I have to be male me. I am not too happy
Hugs
Natasha 💋
I agree with everything I have read, they all apply but the best one I read compared getting dressed up as an addiction. That’s exactly what it was for me over the years, when I was dressed I was fine but when the time came to go back to being a male again, I would dread it & start planning my next dress up session. Then, just like a drug, when I would dress up, I would find myself wanting to do noticeable things to myself to make me look more like a woman, I tried fighting this urge but eventually it won out & I went out & had my ears pierced & my eyebrows waxed into ultra thin, arched lines, this did not sit well with my wife at the time, a few weeks later & I had my shoulder length hair styled into a feminine look & I got acrylic nails applied. By this point I was wearing panties, bra & pantyhose all of the time even under my work clothes, then I stopped wearing socks & started wearing makeup all of the time, that’s when my wife left me. Everything that happened to me in the past never stopped me from wanting to be a woman, in fact it made me the woman I am today.
To me yes it is dressing up but really is wearing my female clothing I should have worn all my life ie should have been born a woman .Over the years chances of wearing female clothing have been few and far between ,buying clothing then purging it only to buy more ,but now I am slowly building up my collection mainly bras, panties and other underwear ,I am a closest and underdresser which I now do everyday and I realize this is what I should have been ‘in’ my life .not cross dressing but born a female ,it is now to late in life to transition and as mush as I would love to ,I have a wife and three lovely daughters to consider ,so for that reason things will stay as they are but hopefully with the chance to wear my female clothing for longer periods . Michelle xx
Hello Lucinda
I am lucky enough to have meet such a special girlfriend. That’s a story in itself. But if my girlfriend Tiffany doesn’t need male me. She allows me to be Natasha. She loves Natasha very much. They are BFF. Since 2003 I have been wearing women’s clothing. If you read my posts you will see how Natasha has a I dont care what others think attitude. So I am Natasha 85% of the time. I always felt I was different. I myself and my girlfriend enjoy Natasha. She’s kind, loving, respectful, loves everyone. When people meet Natasha for the first time they really take to her. Male me. I could care less about meeting people. Male me is fully opposite. Thus the story on how I meet my girlfriend. Its a miracle on how I meet her. I will post about it sometime. The story was told to some girlfriends on here. I truly believe God said those 2 are perfect for each other. So it happened.
Hugs
Natasha💋
For me it is simple, sometimes I just feel the need to be Simone and sometimes to be my alter ego. I love both personas, and love being in each of them. There are times I want to be male and others I want to be female, and that is where it comes in. In the right persona at the right time just is right!
When I am female I feel totally female, walk and act that way too. If I close my eyes I can feel a female body around me. Then when I am male I revert to being male. Both feel right at the time, and wrong at others.
I am one of those who wishes there was a pill or some device to change gender back and forth when needed, that would be me in the morning!
I am just jealous of female clothing. I love very soft fabric like satin. I love the decorations.. lace, embroidery, gathering. I particularly like the silhouettes and ways of using collars and sleeves, and skirts and shorts or whatever, which have no parallel in male attire. In drab I can be a bit of a dandy. I like to look sharp.
At first it was my wife, she wanted to feminize me, she said I made a better woman than a man. As time went by I came to embrace being a woman and realized she was right. I feel calmer and more at ease than I ever did as a man. Besides who can resist the wide variety of different styles, fabrics, colors and prints that we women can wear. Men’s clothing is so plain and drab. I will dress as the woman I am until my last day on this earth and will be dressed as I take that eternal slumber.
I remember when I touched my mom’s pantys for the first time. They were hanging in the bathroom, and it felt so smooth and silky. Everytime I had to use the bathroom, I would touch it, loving the soft, smooth, silky feel. One day after school (I was a latch key kid), I decided I would try it on. Being a latch key kid meant my parents weren’t home but being a kid also meant I had no concept of time, as I was almost caught one time.
When I put on the pantys, it felt heavenly, the soft, smooth, and silky feel of the material against the skin. Compared to the tighty whiteys I wore which felt like burlap, dull, coarse, and not smooth at all.
When I got older, I raided my mom’s closet even more, and discovered a plethora of clothing, way better than guy clothes which was either a button shirt or t shirt and pants (BORING). Plus the softer material for women’s clothes was so nice.
As my CDing progressed, one reason for dressing is the wide selection of women’s clothes. There is so much possibilities, from dresses, skirts, blouses, under garments like pantys, shapewear, and my fave one piece swimsuits. What do guys have ? either swimming jammers or trunks, neither are really that exciting.
The feel of the material for women’s clothes seem to be much softer, silkier, and way smoother. I think they must use recycled burlap for guy’s clothes because none of it feels that great against the skin. In fact, it feels like 80 grit sandpaper. Men’s fashion is dull, just look at award ceremonies, it is either a tux or suit/tie for guys. But women have gorgeous evening gowns, in all different colours and materials.
My biggest reason is stress relief. Having to copy with work, home, and financial responsibilities takes its toll on me, and being able to dress up and put on pretty clothes/makeup gives me a way to cope with the stress. Once I put primer on my face I can feel the stress evaporate from my mind and it gives me a sense of tranquility as I know I will be transforming into Wendy.
Wendy,
Crossdressing has a calming effect on me, my wife regularly mentions that Caroline is way more relaxed than male me.
-Caroline
i know what exactly you mean, woman’s clothing is lots more comfortable to wear, wide selection of color and fabric, style. i love woman’s clothing over men clothing. i would prefer to wear female clothing every day if i could. men clothing is yes very boring and no selection of style or fabric. i love every ones responds to my post. thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings.
I used to tell my wife it was a compulsion I couldn’t resist, and because the clothes felt so comfortable and so “right” on me. Then one day recently, we were talking, and she said she couldn’t understand why I like Dressing so much…and without thinking, I replied “Because I’m really a girl; I just can’t pass the physical”. Could I have stumbled upon a profound truth?
I dress up to make me feel sexy. It’s all an erotic experience for me.
When i dress up in lacy lingerie and stockings I change from being a hetro married guy who loves his wife. To a slut who seeks men.
I’m not sure that there is a reason in my case, I just have an innate need to be feminine/female – being male has never sat easily with me. Certainly I love the feel of women’s clothes against my skin, wearing them is undoubtedly pleasurable. But, far beyond that, is the sense of peace and completion that I get when I’m totally and completely submersed as Rachel.
The easy answer is the feel of the clothing, the fit, the styles, colours, variety etc etc
Deeper answer would be a longing to experience life as close as I can as a woman.
I am reading a book called A Woman’s Passion written by Alan Barrie (I can’t recall her name here at CDH I’ll check after I write this) and even 30 pages in I am enthralled and entirely jealous that it’s only fiction.
edit: her name is Cheryl Ann (Cassie) Sanders
There are a few reasons why I dress up in my girly girl things. I like to feel feminine, soft, sweet, nurturing like a true female must. I love women, their ways, their friendships, their affection for each other, their looks, their voices, everything about them. Dressing up in feminine styles makes me feel like a part of that group. Sometimes, it sexually arouses me. It helps me feel relaxed, calm, and serene. It is empowering to go out in public, pass as a female, and be treated as such. It allows me to express my creative instincts, fashion sensibilities, and personal style. Most males have no fashion sense whatsoever. They plop into dirty drawers, unwashed jeans, and put a ball cap on their heads. Then, they grab a tshirt. I was never like that. I always dressed well even as a guy. I wore collared shirts, unripped jeans, sometimes pressed ones, and a belt, clean socks, and drawers, and polished shoes. As a female, I add accessories, perfume, and makeup. Once I look in the mirror, am satisfied that it all in place, I’m ready.
Oh my goodness, this is a question that drives me up a wall! Last year I took a personality test that was designed to determine what kind of personality I had and what I would be best at. As it turned out my driving factors involved wanting to know how and why things happen, and wanting to make things work, which means wanting to know why I dress high is on my priority list! Unfortunately I have no clear answer, I love how sexy I feel while dressed, so maybe it’s just a fetish. However if I had to option to have a vagina or a penis I’d jump at having a vagina, it just seems right, so does that make me transgender? I have no real desire to transition, I suspect that I would simply be trading one set of problems for another, so I find myself standing at a crossroads wondering, why, why, why? Now that sounds ominous, but the wondering is not dominating my life, currently I have this question filed under “There are some things that there are no answer to.” At least I am not troubled about my dressing, I see nothing wrong with it and I enjoy it immensely, so much so that the longer I’m dressed the less I want to go back to my drab life, but unfortunately I need to work and I doubt that I could find a job as Pamela. BTW, if you’re curious as to what field the test I took recommended, it was heating, ventilation and air conditioning! I actually burst out laughing when I saw that!
Does anyone really know ? All I know is, it started with just pantyhose then it was panties & pantyhose then came the bra, from there it was dresses or a skirt, then a top, then heels, then makeup, then hair, then going outside, then came the mall, then came the nails, next was shaving my whole body, then jewelry, then piercing my ears, next was plucking my eyebrows, then meeting men, next was sex with men, then the desire to take hormones & lastly getting a sex change.
OMG well let’s see I’m an only child and mother was a single mom.how she would always dress in front of me and how she would ssa me to help zipper her. Dress just seeing joe beautiful she looked in a dress and her makeup. Made me feel jealous so I started to dress in her clothes I felt so so happy I wanted my own wardrobe so now 45yesrs later im still enjoying being the woman I always felt I was love it so much never going back
No idea!
I just love dressing up – always have done.
You couldn’t keep me away from am-dram if you tried.
I could never figure out why I felt annoyed that I never got picked to play a female role – but most am drama compromise 75-80% women, and I am too tall to play the dame in panto – closest I got was Buttons.
So no idea, really – I like every costume I’ve worn, as I really like acting, or, rather, pretending to be someone else – possibly rooted in intense self-loathing as a teenager, when I fully realised that I wanted not just to dress up, but to dress up female specifically.
To have that focus outside of myself was necessary to me as a teenager and young man as there was no way I was going to share what was inside – round my way, that would have been like signing my own death warrant, and untold horrors on my family. If only this was exaggeration.
Why female specifically?
In my teens, I tried in secret, and, like many, found the erotic side, which brought the whole guilt trip to the party.
Finally going out en femme proved to me that there’s more to it than a sexual kick – much more.
It’s an ingrained thing.
The sexual aspects are simply that the clothes are designed to be sexually appealing to men.
The clothes also have confidence building and other aspects of self-expression for the wearer way beyond the sexual – and, once these are discovered, that element seems to go away – at least, it has, almost totally, for me.
Exotic lingerie still has the power to thrill, but I avoid wearing it for that very reason. My dressing is not about that – it’s about “being Laura”, whatever that means.
It currently means letting all the repressed stuff out – which I initially imagined would be painful, like squeezing a zit to let the poison out.
Instead, apart from the emotional pain in my relationship, which I very much hope is passing (a 20 year-old zit’s not gonna be a party), it’s been a total blessing.
Yeah, the emotional pain is not what I wanted, especially as it affects more than one person, but it’s so necessary to our lives.
Being a cross dresser is an amazing and very special thing – and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!
Love Laura
I’ve always had a very very feeling inside of me that I was supposed to be a woman all my life I was so jealous of how beautiful woman look with makeup on and very pretty dresesses and heels on and nice perfume as an only child and single mother I always loved watching her .Dress and how she always knew I was studying how she dressed and did her makeup.buy time I was
You’re not alone there, honey – you’re in good company!
I’ve never really had the feeling of wanting to be a woman, except as part of the teenage thing.
I soon realised that, although I am not happy or comfortable in my male body – I hate all male physicality instinctively, it’s not something I can switch off – I wouldn’t be happier as a person in a woman’s body. The clothes are enough for me.
But one size fits one person in the happy world of cross dressing – we’re all different and lovely because of it!
Love Laura
Hi
I have always felt more comfortable in women clothing, I’m mtf transgender if it matters. I’ve never been especially interested in male clothing’s. It’s so boring. As a man I always wear, an has always done, jeans, t-shirt, a pullover. Simply, it’s not funny. On the other hand I can spend hours in shops or nowadays on internet looking at and too often buy nice dresses, skirts and so on. It makes me feel really good, wearing women’s clothing and I always dress with style, maybe a little to young to my age, but not much. At work clothing is simple, everybody wear scrubs.
Sorry to say I have never dressed i public. But it will happen when it gets warmer again. I’m really yearning to get out. I just want to be more skilled in makeup and get a better wig. Then…Lots of hugs
Lily-Rosei agree female clothing is a better fit and better looking, male cloths are boring and not good fit at all. i have more female clothing then male clothing, dresses, skirts, nylons, panties and bra and even pads, make up, earings. wish i could just dress up in female clothing when i feel like it and no one would care.
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