What piece of advice/aide memoir do you value most? How might it work for us?

[Anonymous]

During your time on CDH, you will, I hope, have received some sound advice or a strategy/ aide memoir that remains inspirational for you today?

There can be no better advice than that given with respect and with a desire to help somebody improve, recover, do better, or feel valued.

Please keep it short. The aide memoir is the best – it is short, exact, precise and clear. However you have the choice – inspire us, remind us, tell us how it helped you.

It might just be the perfect gift?

Anya ( Merry Christmas to you and your close ones) xox

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Topic

[Lara Tucker]

I’m just echoing at this point but,

you are not doing anything wrong

you are not alone (most important)

It is truly amazing to meet so many wonderful people with this similar interest!

I love this place!

Lara

 

 

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[Anonymous]

You are welcome – make yourself at home . Find the answers through the advice of many. Cross reference and keep asking when you need to. I’m just a messenger- you know where the “ disciples” are.

Anta hugs xox

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Alice Underwire, Lara Tucker, Sylvia

[Stevie Steiner]

Hi Anya!  I think one of the things I have learned is not to worry so much in how perfect I can look on the outside (since I never will), but on how happy I feel on the inside.  Though I have learned and come to understand more about how to best present myself, it’s that help of feeling good on the inside about who I am  that has helped most.  The understanding and confirmation (!), that it is not I that is  broken, or “wrong’, but that it is society’s  attitudes and understanding that is wrong.   Having that simple advice – that idea – reinforced in my mind helps so much.  🙂

Stevie

 

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[Anonymous]

I understand . The essence I wish to emphasise is that without the Family  there is no voice, no support , no direction, no point. The duty is to use these pieces of magical confession to enhance the rest of us. Just look and feel the power of what is being contributed. Some bits mean more to us than others- but oh my the power of this response is overwhelming. Better still it is in a framework of love as we just simply share those things which are important. Our journeys are not the same yet we yearn to travel together, some run ( old folk like me walk!!! ( ha ha a laughing tears and thumbs up). Thank you for contributing – there will be some stunning reports in CDH and you folk deserve the royalties  thank you all and well done. “ I couldn’t have said it better myself!!” Over to you……

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[Sylvia]

Dear Anya ,

During my time on CDH The other girls her have been my inspiration.
They inspire me every day by telling me their experiences , and by giving me
their wisdom on the Forums and in PM.
During the workingday I am already excited that I will be on CDH in the evening.
I can´t remember anymore how life was before joining here.
I am grateful for all that are here , and to those that will be joining us in the near future
after they stop by here by chance….
I truly believe that there is no such thing.
None of us are here by chance , we were meant to be here all along !

Love Sylvia.

• This reply was modified 5 months ago by Sylvia.

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[Anonymous]

That is worth a frame and hanging in the main corridor of CDH. Remember it is for us –

Vanessa wanted a safe place and it is here. The only devils are those who are selfish. Altruism is the aim and your statement encapsulates all we wish for. You also show great humility -‘“ for those in the future”. there is experience in your words of inspiration. You clearly have felt the collegiality with depth. And I say to you “ well done “ for that needs to be seen and heard. CDH is for you ( not the few). Those who step inside our family, albeit for a short visit , will never forget that we are strong in unity. We all need support, those who work for us here need support- what a task- I hate being guilty of name dropping -‘so I won’t. But there is a great deal of expertise here and wisdom. We know who makes us feel comfortable and there is a choice of stars to ask. Better still, the ground force is a powerful stabilised and knowledgable band of girls who are dedicated to each other. When you feel that,  it is so deep and strong.  Thank you Sylvia on behalf of us all. Now you can teach me the art of brevity!!!!! ( ha ha ) Anya x

 

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[Sylvia]

Dear Anya ,

Thank you very much , You are too kind !
But it is us who have to thank You , for your wise words , and for starting
this beautiful topic.

Love Sylvia.

• This reply was modified 5 months ago by Sylvia.

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Lara Tucker

[Peggy Sue Williams]

Weekly, sometimes twice weekly, I see new girls joining CDH from the Atlanta, Georgia metro area, often they reside right here in my county!   This is not surprising, because Atlanta is a large and heavily populated area, served by the world’s busiest airport.

My point?  I am inspired, motivated if you will, to help local sisters, with their journey, particularly if they have yet to go out in public.  Developing a strategy for your first outing can be overwhelming.  Having the assistance of a big sister can be comforting and reassuring.  If nothing else, I want to make contact with local sisters who are still in the closet and offer support.

Atlanta is a CD friendly city!  Having CD girl friend makes it even better.

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[Anonymous]

Thank you. The benefit of this is that I can also learn from the knowledge of others. Win win.( grin)

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Alice Underwire, Sylvia

[Liara Wolfe]

By joining CDH I have been amazed of how many of us girls are out there. Knowing you are not alone is a lifesaver.

Hugs, Liara

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[JOJO]

Very simply put. We are not alone in our journey!

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[Gabriela Romani]

Not from CDH, but to those who are wanting to go out or are going out already…

“Passing” is seen as a goal by most everybody who is thinking about going out, or may have been out just a few times.
Sure, “passing” is nice, and much better than “not passing”.

But hopefully at some point you may realize that Acceptance is much better. When you are trying to pass you are worried about, the look, how you move, your height, your makeup, your voice, etc. Some are too worried to even being able to enjoy being out.

But when you feel good about all or some of the previous, and you relax and forget about “pretending”, things may click into place, and you may start feeling confident and stop worrying with “can they tell?”, and realize that as long as you are treating everybody nicely and with respect, they are likely to treat you back the same way! Regardless if they know or not!

So, dress and look nicely for you. Not for everybody else. And enjoy your time out, socialize with people, be yourself!

Gabriela

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[Anonymous]

There is a lot in this piece. Perception, expectations, reality-  to name some of the “ process” involved. Perhaps we need to analyse the processes we go through and ask if they are productive or not necessary. Not an easy task but, if possible, with a good friend,  you might get an informed overview.
However, if on your own you need to be kind on yourself too. “ Enjoy your time” “ Do it for yourself”. “ Be relaxed” .

Thank you, a provocative reply that should lead to improvement. And a calmer self!

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Alice Underwire, Lara Tucker, Sylvia, Liara Wolfe, Dee Nash

[Anonymous]

You are not a pervert.
You are not doing anything wrong.

You are not alone.

Connie

xxx

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[RachelAnn]

Good topic, I will echo the sentiments of not being alone.  This is the first and only place on the internet I’ve interacted with anyone who is like us.  It always amazes me how so many girls from all over the world with different backgrounds can come together and share experiences.

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[Anonymous]

That’s very positive , I agree. Strength in unity. Prayers for the continuing of that, certainly. When each members “ grows” it becomes a “ garden” of success.

Thank youfor your message.

Anya xox

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Alice Underwire, Lara Tucker, Sylvia, Liara Wolfe, Dee Nash

[Clara Cross]

Two things. First, “check all the boxes” to present as female as possible (courtesy of Ms Stephanie Plumb) and “what you are doing is not wrong (or illegal, or a sin)”. Also, “you are not alone”.

Well I guess that’s three things..I’ve learned quite a bit here! ♥️

Best,

Miss Clara

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Lara Tucker, Sylvia, Liara Wolfe, Dee Nash, Michelle McQueen

[Anonymous]

Good Morning (Here) Anya.. There is one overwhelming message I get here from so many.. That it is Alright to be Me, To Love Myself  & not be ashamed.. That My journey will have it’s up’s & downs but Listen to you’re Heart (and The Wonderful Girls here).. You can Find that peace & Happiness we all deserve…  Jill

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[Anonymous]

Good one, Jill, that is a great reminder of what we ought to do. Thank you.

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[Author]

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