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Last October I posted some random thoughts about getting gendered female and a surprise effect of being on HRT for a year. You can read it here: https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/forums/topic/whats-a-little-estrogen/
I’ve been on HRT for 21+ months. Getting gendered female isn’t a surprise anymore. It happens often enough. Usually I’m not making much of an effort. Little or no makeup. Shoulder length hair down in loose waves. Pierced ears. Little boobs. Skinny jeans. Band tee. Chuck Taylor’s. Maybe a leather jacket.
I recently had an absurd experience that I never expected.
Last week I visited my elderly father in Upstate NY. He lives in a fairly large metro area that’s pretty accepting. I’m not out to him yet and I was doing my best boymode presentation all week. I still got gendered female often. He didn’t seem to notice.
One night we went to dinner at a tavern that’s about 20 miles outside the city. It’s in a semi-rural area and somewhat conservative. Walking into the tavern I immediately felt people eyeing me. Sitting at our table there were plenty of stares. The vibe I got was disconcerting….they were uncomfortable….and I didn’t fit in. My dad was oblivious….which only added to my unease.
At one point I needed to use the rest room. There’s no way I was using the ladies in this place. That’s when it got weird.
When I turned to enter the men’s room, a guy sitting at a nearby table yells to me “that’s the men’s room”. I ignored him and went in anyway. A few seconds later he’s behind me and says “Miss you’re in the wrong rest room”. Yikes! Now what? I decide a matter-of-fact response is the best approach. So I turn to him and say in my deepest guy voice “dude I really need to pee.” The dumbfounded look on the guy’s face was priceless. He stammers while retreating “sorry dude I thought you were a girl. I’m really sorry.” I got lucky.
The food and our server were excellent…..and I won’t be going back!
Boymode failure. The way I’m seen has changed. It’s forcing me to reconsider how I interact with society.
Estrogen is amazing!
/EA
Oh Emily, As an intersex person I have had exactly the same experiences. Some were not as forgiving as yours and some were a little scary. It’s always an experience living in the netherworld of hormones, family and the public. On the other hand it may be reassuring during your transition to see that the world is observing you as a woman. It seems to me that we may blend better than we think. Also my leather jacket, baseball cap and hoodie are my constant traveling companions unless I’m glam and then it’s heels and a wiggle dress. I hope that your dad is doing ok. Hugs, Marg
Hi Marg,
It is reassuring that I’m blending in. Apparently better than I realized!
This was an important lesson to learn. It’s getting tough to pull off boy mode. I failed to recognize I was doing exactly what I tell girls to not do….enter the men’s room when presenting as a female. A very risky proposition. Fortunately nothing came of it. I need to be more careful about the places I choose to enter.
Dad just turned 95 and is not in the greatest health. I visit every chance I get….the opportunities are numbered. Thanks for asking.
/EA
Hi Emily, now that I’ve been told by a doctor what I always knew, that I am a woman, an intersex woman. I’m hoping the appointment she wants for me with an endocrinologist will introduce a little more estrogen than whats there now, it would be nice!
Hugs,
Lauren
Interesting experience Emily, certainly scary nice it all turned out well. I suspect the gent in question was just not wanting you to be in the wrong restroom, but your voice sure did the trick!
As the other poster said it is nice that you are being accepted as the gender you want to be. So many cannot no matter what they do.
Amy
Hearing your story now was amusing. I’m sure it wasn’t at the time but it’s over now so maybe you can laugh about it now.
it’s so weird to walk in a place and you suddenly feel not so good vibes from everyone. I have had that feeling a few times. It’s seems to be a mixture of fear or you are some kind of alien with 2 heads. It’s a weird sensation for sure.I was going to ask if your father picked up on the loud conversation, but I presume that, at 95, he didn’t hear it or just ignored it.
Fortunately, you were able to de-escalate without too much hassle.
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