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    • #397553
      Amy Marino
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      Registered On: October 22, 2020
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      What an INSANE year, right ladies?  But it comes with good and bad.  The good is that I am now divorced, again (0-for-2), and committing to the female within.  I am in the process of full body laser and I am living female almost 50% of the time with a goal of ultimately transitioning.  Anyone else doing laser?  I am loving it.  Feel free to reach out

    • #396826
      Marlie Shyly
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      Registered On: January 26, 2020
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      Dear Vanessa,

      I’m not sure how far down the transition path I can go. Part of me wants it, but the other part feels shame and guilt for starting a life I knew was misdirected. So I guess, for now, I’ll settle for learning makeup skills w/o practicing them and shopping online for the day I do figure things out. Love CDH. Such a welcoming and open community here.

      Hugs, Marlie

    • #395940
      Kelly Terry
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      Registered On: February 26, 2018
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      When 2020 started I didn’t really know what my plans where and while I still don’t know where I will be in 1,3,5 years I at least know what changed so far in 2020.

      Kelly have come out to my closest family and Kelly have been out in public in daylight and even interacted with people. My wife while not encouraging she is at least a bit supportive and even walked with me on my outings.

      As for going forward, I’m hoping for more outings and looking forward to them. Beyond that, dunno.

      /kt

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    • #395822
      Vanity Fair
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      Registered On: November 1, 2019
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      Thank you for this post. I have joined CDH and this is some of the best advice I have taken. It is so nice to finally be revealing Vanity to others. I have been so deep in the closet that I have never even talked to another cross dresser. This is my attempt to connect with others who share the feelings and desires the same as I do.

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #393105
      Rei Durden
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      Registered On: October 11, 2020
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      Continuing my improvements in my marital, mental, physical and finacial health.

      I know 2020 has been a dumpster fire SO many people, but it’s been a great year for me on almost every level.

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #392511
      Peggy Sue Williams
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      Registered On: June 26, 2019
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      Anna,

      Congratulations on your 2nd year of sobriety!

      I took my last drink in 1991.  Gained my sobriety through the AA program.

      Peggy Sue

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    • #391942
      Anna Christ
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      Registered On: October 6, 2020
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      Im heading in a good way.

      Im working on being sober for my second year so get to know the me i was running from.

      Got a job to see if i could do it & wow i did it & now see i can get a better job doing what want. Its a long story of why i thought i couldnt. But this job is cool & became manager on duty. But because of no real money ,cant work 40 plus hrs a week & because its so stressful because of stuff that ii cant change ill be putting in a three month notice soon so they will have enough time to replace me. But if they could meet what i need in a job i would stay because i found i can handle the stress.

      Then i stopped crossdressing for a long time because i though i would never find a women that would except me doing it.

      So now me & this women are going to get married soon & i said something about crossdressing & she said if you want to then i wont stop you.

      So thats nice to hear because i have come to find that i do like to crossdress & shouldnt of stopped because some women didnt like it. I thought if i stopped i could get her back & then up finding someone better.

      Now just have to find places to go crossdressed & find friends that crossdress.

       

      Love you all hugs

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    • #379741
      Donna Stryfe
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      Registered On: September 1, 2020
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      Got over my divorce and am now figuring out myself. I have been practicing make-up, growing my wardrobe, trying to do exercises…not sure i want to transition, but having more fun and confidence crossdressing this year. Might even look to venturing out dressed.

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    • #375900
      Lucy
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      Registered On: August 4, 2020
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      Hi Vanessa,

      In the past three months I have accepted I am a crossdresser albeit closeted. I’m not going to advertise it. The next step for me is to get to know others like me, not as a sexual thing, but for mutual support and perhaps a little help with things like makeup. Then the next big hurdle will be to appear in public, where no one knows me mind you.

      Natasha, I feel very much the same. The last few months, strange as they have been, have allowed me to be Lucy most of the time which has made me much more at ease and accepting of my feminine side. I too would like to meet others like us and go out in public less furtively than I have so far, just in a relaxed, ‘normal life’ way. I do hope that we and perhaps a few others in this part of England can get together soon.

      Lucy

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    • #375070
      Lea
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      Registered On: March 23, 2016
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      I thought I knew, now I don’t….like so many others, too much has changed this year. For me, last year a lot changed…though I did not realize last year’s changes until this shelter.

      I used to yearn to wear feminine clothes and shoes out. I think I still do. But it’s different…I miss seeing fashion walking around, I miss seeing women dressing well, I miss lots of people about to feel anonymous and unnoticed while dressed.

      I used to have a decent friends base. Getting older, people moving, interests changing, and meeting some new friends, I would say I’m sort of starting over and it’s hard to do that right now.

      I miss my thrift stores, my SA friends, the thrill of finding a deal.

      2020…no longer sure…forward I hope.

       

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    • #373418
      Natasha Crossdresser
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      Registered On: August 6, 2020
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      Hi Vanessa,

      In the past three months I have accepted I am a crossdresser albeit closeted. I’m not going to advertise it. The next step for me is to get to know others like me, not as a sexual thing, but for mutual support and perhaps a little help with things like makeup. Then the next big hurdle will be to appear in public, where no one knows me mind you.

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #373242
      Carri
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      Registered On: September 2, 2018
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      Updated post.

      Endocrinologist and cardiologist are my next stops.  My Estradiol fell to zero finally and my body doesnt respond to testosterone even though it makes it. It feels like it’s going to be an uphill fight, just wondering if I should try finish what was started with oestrogen all I need to finish is my facial features and fat distribution on my face.

      I finally told my mother some about me, she was more receptive than I thought. Still thinks I’m a male though, going to be fun watching her jaw hit the floor in front of a counselor at church. Still want to see a licensed therapist though who deals with the types of issues I face.

      I have intentions of getting fat transfer breast augmentation and having my nose feminized.

      This year I really hope to have my life back to normal for me.  Who would have thought losing an ovatestis would create so much chaos in my life a year later.

       

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    • #370945
      Jenny Angelique Sanders
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      Registered On: October 21, 2015
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      so far this year it has been hectic but worth every moment.  I’m in Canada now on an extended vacation and really considering getting a house up this way in Nova Scotia it’s a beautiful country.  also strongly considering breast augmentation. we are on land now but our transportation is docked in the harbor. we sailed in on a Catermeran 3 weeks ago   now renting 3 large cabins in a remote area.

       

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    • #367604
      rhonda
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      Registered On: October 13, 2015
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      I may not know where I’m going up or down I know I’m a crossdresser now I maybe even a queer

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #367594
      LES TOLET
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      Registered On: June 6, 2019
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      NOT A CLUE WHERE I GO THIS YEAR.

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    • #365515
      Jem Z
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      Registered On: July 6, 2020
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      Trying gain more confidence in dressing up and move myself forward.

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #365468
      Giselle Reeves
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      Registered On: September 27, 2017
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      nowhere fast

    • #365442
      Gloria Renee
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      Registered On: July 7, 2020
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      Well ladies, hopefully get to go out in a couple of weeks. It has been so long since I have been out.  I will be doing this myself without help.  I have the outfit (at least on order), need to order the makeup. Wish I had more time to practice with it.  There is just so much of it, one wrong move, start over again.

      Where am I going, maybe to the movies, maybe just for a walk near the theater, depending upon what is playing.

      Not sure when i will be able to go out again with this pandemic going on.  I need the SO to take the kids away and that doesn’t happen very often (if ever).

      -Gloria

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    • #362641
      Scarlett398
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      Registered On: June 29, 2018
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      Two errors and I think there’s even a grammar error in that short writing of mine. And I used to teach English and Grammar at the high school level!

      Well, that’s what I get for not reviewing the writing before hitting the “reply” or “send” or “submit” button!

      Sorry about that……Scarlett

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    • #361698
      Isabelle O’Malley
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      Registered On: May 13, 2019
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      Going to try a couple of ‘first’ myself this year. This Covid crap has repressed so much what I wanted to do this year but ‘fed u’ and going for it anyways!! Hugs and Kisses!

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    • #360090
      Scarlett398
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      Registered On: June 29, 2018
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      Hi Vanessa, Scarlett here!

      Where am I headed in 2020?

      I’m headed towards lots of experimentation with so many different types of lady’s clothing I’ve never tried before!

      High waisted short shorts, dress slacks, casual slacks, new tops, and so many different style of tops and skirts, shear tops, body suits, new foot wear – even girls running shoes, and even overalls for the first time with sexy body suits worn underneath them to sex them up a bit!

      My next area of femme wear I’ll be trying is going to be femme workout wear! Sexy full length workout tights, paired with sexy tops, and even sexy pink running shoes paired with the workout wear.

      I love trying new things. I won’t be doing ball gowns and wedding dresses. Just have now desire to go there what those two categories of lady’s clothing!

      Great question, Vanessa! XOXOXO Scarlett

       

       

       

    • #358111
      Birel Galanodel
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      Registered On: May 3, 2020
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      I’m not exactly sure where I am headed in 2020, but it may lead me out of the safety of my home. My wife wants to go out with Birel, which is a terrifying idea to me. She initially thought of driving an hour or so to a different city to dine out, where we would not likely run into anyone we know (we live in a very conservative place). But, I think sensing my fear, she now suggested we take a long weekend away in Vegas. And I like that idea a lot. We’ve never been to Vegas together, and I’m pretty sure that I won’t look like the most shocking person walking down the sidewalk there. 🙂

      But, I feel like I’m jumping from a beginner/underdresser, to having to try to fully dress and leave the security of my home. The idea is very exciting to me though…

      It was canceled this year, but I read a little bit about the Keystone Conference in Harrisburg, PA, and thought about seeing if she would like to go with me to try that one out next year.

      Birel

    • #358091
      Stevie Steiner
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      Registered On: June 11, 2020
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      I am heading towards the girl on the other side of the mirror.  Actually I have bumped into the mirror already.  Lol.

      Covid has hampered but by no means stopped things, but I will say I am looking forward to 2021.  Open shops, borders!, and parades.  Yes I’ll be optimistic – things will be better in many ways than they are now.  🙂

    • #357695
      Jenny Jones
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      Registered On: November 5, 2019
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      So I am still getting prepared, I’ve realized. I’m still finding myself so I have very little that is exactly ‘femme’ and mostly just things that are good for me. Losing weight (down thirty pounds since I started in April), getting a house for more privacy and freedom (almost got the money saved up just waiting for my lease to expire), and I think the most important thing I’m working on is: Making friends. I am a bit of a recluse, so I’m being more active here and on other sites trying to make new friends to talk to. It is hard, but I am trying my best.

      A few other ‘firsts’ I wanna do this year: First makeover, first outing, first time successfully applying make-up myself. A lot of plans…just gotta get them all done.

    • #355822
      Brittney Andrews
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      Registered On: August 1, 2019
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      2019 was such a disappointment compared to 2018. 2019 started with a 4 month restriction in travel options, due to my vehicle being down from February to June. The year ended with me working 6 and 7 days per week from the beginning of October. These periods prevented me from attending my CD/TG support group meetings, my primary en fem dressing activity. I was hoping 2020 would be better, not to be.

      My extra work schedule carried over and continued until March. March 12th I was able join a second support group and was planning on attending my local Transgender Day of Visibility(TDoV) as my first public event dressed en full fem. THEN COVID STOPPED EVERYTHING. Every other week I was still working 6 or 7 days per week, that finally ended the start of June. Since I missed out on TDoV and had worked so much extra, I planned to save some money back and reward my fem self.

      Last Thursday (6/11/20), I made my second trip to Janet’s Closet (my first was July 2019). It’s a crossdressers specialty super-store south of Detroit, Michigan. I made it extra special and shopped dressed en full fem for the first time. Coming up on the 29th, I have a consultation about a transformation make-over and photo shoot. I’m really excited about it. I’m just hoping and waiting for my two support groups to restart their meetings and social events, once that happens I will be on Cloud 9, actually Pink Cloud 9.

    • #348420
      Kay Anderson
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      Registered On: June 1, 2020
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      Well here it is June 2020. What a crazy year this has been so far for the world. For me, around February  I had an awakening. Several things came together and my self acceptance opened up like never before. The inner war of male tough guy and gentle feminine that lasted most my of my life ended. There is no going back for me. For the rest of 2020, I plan to meditate and self reflect on what it means to fully allow my inner woman to grow. I am striving to heal myself of past traumas and wounds.

      After a nasty purge many years ago, I am re-building my collection of female items. I have been buying small amounts of makeup as I go along. I am feminizing my body in natural ways and will continue to do so.

      My planned vacation to the mountains with my daughter is canceled. I hope to make some short trips to connect with nature.

    • #348298
      Wendy Swift
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      Registered On: May 11, 2020
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      Here is my path in 2020 :

      – this one started before 2020, but going forward I am following it even more.  I am only buying clothing for Wendy if it fits, something that I like, and will wear.  I used to go to stores and buy clothing just for the sake of buying something.  I would take it home, try it and find it the item is way too small/big or not the style that I would wear ever again, and that item would go into the donation bag – turning into a huge waste of money.  I’ve purged only items that did not fit or would not wear ever again, and it was quite a few items.

      – my dressing is constantly evolving.  I went from foam padding panties to full on silicone hip/butt pads and breastforms.  I had been eyeing full silicone female suits, or the very least full lower torso female pants with working parts, and then at a later date full breast plate.  These ones are in no hurry and will need further investigation as they are expensive items.

      – continually hone my makeup skills.  From when I started to now, it is day and night, but I know there is still lots to learn.

      – follow the mantra “less is more”.  Whenever I dressed, I felt I had to layer on the shapewear to the point where it constricted blood flow in my body (to obtain the hourglass figure).  It got to the point where it was detrimental to my health so I reducing the amount of shapewear, and I am liking it.  It feels more comfortable and way less restrictive.  This mantra will apply to make up as well.

      – stop buying costume style wigs and pony up for some decent quality wigs.  I’m not talking human hair wigs or super expensive synthetics, but affordable quality type wigs that do not look like costume wigs.

      – not sure if this will be in 2020, but actually try on women’s clothing in store.

      – one day actually dress up as Wendy for Halloween.

      – continue with my swimsuit collection.

      Not sure how much of that I will accomplish in 2020, but at least that sets out my path for the year.

       

       

       

       

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    • #342405
      Amber Scott
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      Registered On: June 30, 2019
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      To be quite honest, I have no idea what so ever.

      Love and Peace,

      Amber

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #341562
      Chrissy Jones
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      Registered On: April 26, 2020
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      I think I’ve already made it to where I need to be in 2020.

      I’ve been crossdressing as often as I could for the last ten plus years. Over that time my wardrobe has grown, and been purged, and grown again. I’d learned how to calculate my bra size, walk awkwardly in heels, and apply makeup. I’d even become comfortable taking photos of myself in dresses and intimates. But I convinced myself that crossdressing is for drag queens; my crossdressing was just a kink, a lark, personal foreplay. But it was always something I had to hide. And hide it I did, mostly from myself. Oh, I found time to slip into a bra and panties, pull on a dress, and slip on my heels. I shopped in the women’s wear department more than in men’s wear.  I watched the women on the streets around my office and asked myself “Where did she get that dress?” But I wasn’t a crossdresser. I just had a secret kink.

      That changed two months ago. Stay at home orders forced me to slow down; took away all the things that kept me running at full speed all day every day. I started asking questions of myself and my desire to be pretty; to feel the silkiness of stockings and panties; to wear a sexy dress and high heels. I wondered why I missed the afternoons and evenings when everyone was gone and I had several hours could fell free, pretty, feminine, complete. I finally admitted to myself that I am a crossdresser.

      That simple moment of self-confession has changed me in ways I hadn’t expected. I felt like a weight had been lifted from my soul. Chrissy is a part of who I am, and I am gleefully accepting her. Since I let Chrissy into my life I’ve smiled and laughed more than I have I years. I see it in my photos. Two months ago, I was serious and super frowny, worried about everything. Maybe deep down I was worried that I was some sort of creepy old man. I’m not a creepy old man, I’m a cross dresser.

      Since I’ve let Chrissy out, I smile more, laugh more. We’ve had moments of absolute, blissful contentment. Thank you, Vanessa! Crossdresser Heaven, and all the wonderful girls that are members, have helped me become whole and let me be Chrissy without fear; be proud of who and what I am.

      I am Chrissy Jones and I’m a crossdresser!

    • #340320
      Amanda Wannabe
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      Registered On: April 30, 2020
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      Other than obvious global concerns, I’m really just hoping to have a better understanding of myself on two fronts:

      1) Am I really a woman or just a guy who needs to feel like one on occasion?

      When I was younger I crossed dressed all the time. As a teen, I slept in a bra, panties, and nightgown every night (except when I wore lingerie!).  I dreamed of womanhood – imagining I had big breasts and a vagina.

      Those feelings mostly went away (or I suppressed them) for 25 years. Occasionally I’d strap on a bra and put on some lacy panties, but nothing like my youth.

      Truthfully, I’m generally happy as a man, but sometimes I just get the urge and I want to feel like a woman – even if it’s just for a little while.

      Not gonna lie, sometimes I wish I had a set of D cups on me or real instead of just a silicone breast form.  No interest in doing any alterations below the belt, but oh I often wish I had boobs!

      So im trying to figure this out and just learn from everyone else’s stories. I don’t know which way I’m headed.

      2) Sexuality – I’ve been in relationships with both men and women. I had a boyfriend in college, but we broke up and ended up marrying a wonderful woman I genuinely love (and am attracted to). She doesn’t know I used to date a guy – we were both in the closet then – it was 1991.

      I never once cheated on her, but I will admit to looking st gay porn occasionally.

      I have urges for men – especially when I’m dressed. Don’t worry – I’m not here trying to pick up a date. If I wanted that, there are plenty of opportunities.

      I think I’m genuinely bi-sexual because my wife genuinely turns me on, but I can look at a man and also be aroused.

      She does not know I dress or also have an atraction to men. Well, I don’t believe she knows. I don’t know how she’s handle it and I’m a very afraid to find out.

      Anyway, I’m glad I stumbled across this site and gave it a chance. Thank you so much for giving me a place to post my story.

      Luv to you all!

      -Amanda

      p.s. – I really love getting to use my feminine name here!

       

    • #340079
      Anonymous
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      Not very far, at mo the farthest seems to be a local bluebell wood – sweet after rain.  Got another week, southside of the dell, before they die back. The wood sorrel’s out as well; neither thought I’d be so pleased by that herd of cows in the neighbouring field.  Its peculiar this patch, liminal, ten minutes from its edge Nicola’s back in a northern English city.

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    • #337752
      Cara Mason
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      Registered On: March 24, 2020
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      Hopefully in 2020 now I am loving full time as a female things will be a lot better I won’t get as depressed i will get referred to the gender clinic and hopefully the lockdown will end and we will be let out

      .I am nervous about that though because when I start mixing with other females I fear it will kick off my gender dysphoria where I get dark thoughts as I WANT to be every female I see and wear there clothes

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    • #336397
      Anonymous
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      When my male self looks in the mirror I always have a feeling of “something’s not right” and this is what started my dressing again. My wife is tolerant but not accepting. I also have a 22 year old son who will be moving back in when he’s done with school.  Dressing keeps me sane and calm and I can’t do much. I find myself thinking more of transitioning lately. When I was younger dressing would provide occasional sexual gratification via a tryst with another CD or a man. Thats mostly all behind me now. Nowadays my motivation is emotional stability.

       

      When I couple this with a history of self harm (there were several deep dives into the world of S & M) it forces me to consider speaking to a therapist about transitioning.

      Eventually I’ll get myself sorted out. I know I’m not suicidal, simply not pleased with myself to the pont of not having my picture taken.

       

      There are other obstacles, two years ago I was in an an accident which left me in a coma, permanently disabled. Nobody will tell me how badly I was injured. Recently I read letters from my lawyer to the defendents in my case detailing a laundry list of injuries. That left me sobbing I won’t go into details but it looks like I died twice and was revived. I resolved I’m not going to live a life of lies. the phone is right here I just need the will to pick it up and make the call.

      I’m tired of hiding.

    • #330188
      Bethany Delaney
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      Registered On: January 15, 2019
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      Embrace Bethany whole heartedly be her as much as possible. Lose some weight try to work on being more feminine and hopefully start electrolysis and have my facial moles removed and maybe get more done on my house and consolidate and reduce my business inventory in the hopes of possibly selling and moving away so I could completely transition

    • #328085
      Nick Lacroix
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      Registered On: February 3, 2020
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      This year I hope to Express my femininity more by getting a makeover from a professional makeup artist who works with the transgender community. If I’m happy with the results I’ll go back and ask for her to teach me how to do my face. I’m also talking to a therapist about my sexuality and wonder how it will play out.

    • #325581
      Gretchen Bixby
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      Registered On: March 11, 2020
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      I really feel good where I am right now. My male and more dominant life does not really interfer with my part time female side. The money I spend on outfits has in no way crashed my budget or upset any future financial goals I have. I will say that 2018 and 2019 I did really invest and indulge in my female side. By this past Christmas my womans woredrobe went from 3 dresses, a romper and 3 pairs or heels to 23 outfits, 11 shoes and boots, 1 winter coat and 2 faux furs. I wore every outfit several times and knew that downsizing might be a good idea. I settled 7 dresses, 2 rompers, 2 blouses, the nicer faux fur and the jean skirt some of you might have seen. Then I just picked the shoes that matched those outfits and donated the rest. Just like my male self I always try to purge once a year to avoid clutter. Anyway as long as I still look good and feel good made up I will continue to do this. I actually just bought a new dress today from my favorite store. I do not have anything formal that is white so a girl needs something in every color, am I right?

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    • #324762
      Charlotte Stoner
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      Registered On: March 8, 2020
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      Since we are in the opening act of the year, everything is still build-up to the call to adventure 😉 so I will take it as it goes. Although I have some plans, most of which is to live a little healthier, and do regular exercises (for some reason I am more motivated to exercise when wearing women’s exercise clothing.. there is just something about the freedom of movement the tights give, also the male side is usually rather bland).

      I also am planning on going out into public  for the first time by maybe July. I already placed some leave at my work for somewhere in July, I am planning on hitting the beach, and go far from home, so it might be the best place to try. Maybe even drive all the way to the coast while crossdressing (it is a bit of a drive, roughly 5-7 hours).

      The one thing I am definitely looking at doing is either accept this part of me for once and all, or gain better understanding and see how it goes.

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    • #296463
      Seren
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      Registered On: March 2, 2020
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      A bit late to this party, but in the last few days I’ve come out to my partner (married nearly two years, but together for 20+ years) and I’ve been thinking about that conversation, and what led me to take the plunge. 


      I was travelling recently and had a couple of opportunities to dress (always travel prepared with a stash of lingerie and hosiery).
      As I was driving back to the Eurotunnel I remembered the ‘duty free’ dept with its range of high end cosmetics. I’ve experimented before, but usually in quick snatched moments borrowing my o/h’s make up, but I thought, fxxk it, no-one will care. So I treated myself to new lip gloss, 2 eye pencils and some mascara. It was so easy that I regret not going the whole hog and asking one of the ladies for advice on colours and everything else!
      Anyway, I spend the next hours in the car sooooo eager to get to my hotel for the night.
      Washed, dressed, shaved, and then…. it feels so good. Can’t wait to try again, maybe after another shopping trip!
      Some photos soon, I promise.

      So, this ramble was meant to come to a conclusion. I think I just felt in such a good space at the time that I imagined anything was possible.

      That must’ve been an up moment (so to speak) as now it seems like i dreamt it, or at least misremembered how good it felt and how happy I was with how I looked. And I’m back to doubting, and processing my o/h’s reaction, wondering how long she’ll need to process (or possibly she’ll just park it in the ‘too difficult’ basket) 

      anyway, all of a sudden it’s March and there’s signs of spring after recent crazy weather.

      hope you’re all having as healthy and happy a 2020 as your circumstances allow xx

    • #295996
      Shawna Layne
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      Registered On: February 29, 2020
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      Hi Vanessa and all my beautiful sisters!

      I set for myself some pretty exciting goals for 2020, and I’m happy to say that (so far) I haven’t chickened-out on any of them! So far I’ve made it a point to become more active in women’s groups in my area.

      In joining “Meetup”, I’ve joined women’s social groups, professional groups and health and beauty groups. While I also enjoy interacting with trans and LGBTQ groups, my goal was to interact and be productive and successful as a woman. So far it’s been wonderful, and no one has shunned me for “not being a REAL woman”!

      I’ve also added more feminine items to my work wardrobe…so far my skinny jeans and wedge boots haven’t raised any eyebrows or caused anyone to have a stroke (that I know of…lol)! I work in an all male office (except for me, of course)…and the light makeup, lipstick, waxed eyebrows and grown-out and manicured nails haven’t elicited any comments. I plan to push the envelope a bit more as the year goes on.

      My MAIN goal is to reconnect with a girlfriend I met here on CDH and enjoy outings with her. As I mentioned in my bio, I dropped out of sight for awhile because of personal matters – and unfortunately, Shawna’s entire life was put on hold for a few months. I hope she forgives me for disappearing without warning – and that we can enjoy being girlfriends again.

      I wish everyone a safe, joyous and prosperous 2020!

      Hugs,

      Shawna

       

       

    • #280949
      Samantha Murphy
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      Registered On: February 20, 2018
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      A year of self-improvement for me in general. I’m planning on moving later this spring which will allow me to crossdress more. I’m hoping to learn more about makeup and I’ve been working out which as helped me to lose some weight. I’ve begun watching what I eat and plan on learning more about nutrition later this year.

    • #280943
      Anonymous
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      I don’t know exactly where I am heading.  I do know that I am considering exploring and enjoying my feminine side beyond just occasional cross-dressing.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #280154
      Jessica Powers
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      Registered On: January 29, 2020
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      2020 will Be a year of many self improvements and reflections. I am going to get more fit and take better care of my appearance I(nails and moisturizer and skin care) and to go out dressed as Jessica.  I’d love to he able to put on some athletic wear and makeup and go enjoy a nice hike in the woods.  As Jessica Powers. Thanks to this site and the wonderful people on it and my very accepting and supportive fiance, I think that is very possible.

    • #279632
      Anonymous
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      I want to appear and act more feminine, maybe flirt with a guy or two. Wanting to be a girl just a little more each day I grow older.

    • #278959
      Lauren Goldman
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      Registered On: March 17, 2019
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      I’m hoping to start putting myself out there more this year. I have a pattern that a few times a year I feel the need to go out and try to put myself in a position to meet people. I do it (go to a drag show, go take in a concert, go to a crossdresser support group meeting, etc.) and usually enjoy myself while doing it. But then over the next few days a lot of doubts start creeping in about feeling rejected, having said something dumb, about being seen as creepy, or whatever. Before long I retreat back into being alone, but comfortable. I focus my energy on being available to my kids, staying productive at work, keeping my house in order, and keeping myself from spiraling into depression.

      As a result, it is very hard for me to connect with people. It’s made worse by me feeling like I need to keep up barriers to keep people from seeing the real me.

      What I want to do is to put myself out there without obsessing about whether I’m being accepted or rejected. I want to meet people without worrying about whether there is potential for a life-long friendship or a romantic relationship. I feel like going out dressed is going to be a big part of helping me to break down some of my barriers and to cultivate a new persona that transcends some of my more self-defeating patterns.

      I hope that by writing this down I can motivate myself to make it happen.

    • #278876
      Rami Love
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      Registered On: November 30, 2018
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      2020 will be a year of self improvement, find a gender therapist, start facial electrolysis, voice feminization, build my support network, get my BMI below 25, physical fitness, learn about makeup and avoid the politics rabbit hole.

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    • #275192
      Rachel Williams
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      Registered On: June 16, 2019
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      For right now, because of finances, I’ll be content to fully dress where and when I can.  If my money situation improves, would like to move out of state and live full time as Rachel and make any physical changes that I can.  FFS, a boob job, just to name a couple.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #275092
      Paula1
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      Registered On: October 22, 2015
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      I just want to be able to go out on a Girls night with a group of fun loving girls

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #274859
      Kim Dahlenbergen
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      Registered On: November 18, 2019
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      2019 was an ending.   I retired and moved cross country.   Consequently, 2020 is the start of another stage…perhaps the last stage of my life.   I intend to live more openly as a trans person…day to day and traveling.  Why not!

    • #274283
      Carri
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      Registered On: September 2, 2018
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      Most likely I will be going on estrogen replacement therapy. Its going to be an uphill fight because while I look male-ish my chromosomes say otherwise and so does my hormone count. If you look male you get Testosterone, doesn’t matter what your body looks like or functions on.  I still get that’s not possible from Doctors, you can’t be alive for 39 years and have what you have, men don’t function without T.

      Continue to research what I am likely to experience later in life and maybe find people who are less judgemental and less “oh that’s not possible you are either M or F you can’t have half of male and half of female parts”. Uh hUh heard that one before. You can’t have a brain and say stupid things at the same time but yet here I am listening to ignorant fall outta yo mouth.

      I haven’t decided if I want to say anything to friends or not, probably not because Intersex is not known by many people. They think it’s trans and it’s not. Already told my mum, sorry I could never make kids. You had a child (supposed to be a boy) who is unable have kids of their own, and has different hormones and chromosomes than males do.

       

    • #273455
      Sandy Chase
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      Registered On: November 2, 2019
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      Vanessa, I don’t know if I used the correct form of communication in my last note if not please guide me. Thank you, Sandy.

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #273411
      Toni Kohls
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      Registered On: May 16, 2019
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      I’m just going to continue being me. It comes and goes. This is going into my second year of actually embracing it and cross dressing. Hopefully I’ll get out a little more I don’t have a lot of free time. Maybe the next time I’m out I’ll actually talk to someone instead of avoiding people lol. I plan to expand my wardrobe.

    • #272614
      Sandy Chase
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      I think for Sandy it should be an interesting year she is definitely getting out more using different outfits, makeup, and perhaps wigs, blonde then brunette and in between lengths. She should dress more according to her femme moods including garters or pantyhose, short skirt or dresses in the more of a classy mode. Match my nail polish to match my mood and what I want to accomplish for the nite out. Do I want to be seen and attract attention or do I just want to fit in.

      I think Sandy needs to ask herself early in the evening even before the luxurious bath how does she feel does she want to be whistled at like last week from across the parking lot or just spend the evening at a fine restaurant with Cabernet and sit quietly and enjoy the night and the soft music? Maybe a man OR woman buys me a drink and pays the check! We’ll wait and see! Sandy.

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    • #272311
      Anonymous
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      Thank you Roxanne, you gladden my heart. xx

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #272202
      Anonymous
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      I am never sure where I am heading, hopefully out as Sandra more often when I feel brave. I am working on my figure and trying to look younger but it does take time with many down days in between. Realistically more dress shopping and introspection and flattery ( from guys lol ) would be my life this year, of course my swimsuit is beckoning too. x

    • #271669
      Sable Allison
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      Registered On: January 31, 2020
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      embracing my femininity in a way that doesn’t disrupt my masculine life, finding community, and actually going out and buying some of my own feminine clothing. starting with lingerie. also going to shave my legs, and once I’ve got all that down, venture into makeup.

    • #271485
      Maggie May
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      Registered On: January 16, 2020
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      Finally accepting who I am and dealing with the mental issues that go along with it. Will I do anything bold and brave like go out in public? Probably not but who knows. The main thing I want to accomplish is getting over the fears and embarrassment I feel inside. If it were to ever get out that I am a CD, oh well. I will just explain my story to people and hope they understand

    • #271464
      Stef Smith
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      For me i m wearing panties everyday and bras somedays with stockings if its cold. I already polish my tooes. This year i m adding light makeup: foundation and concealer, filling in my eyebrows and lip balm. No one has said anything except i look younger and i look great… so our job has an lgbt no judgement zone meet up once a month and i m thinking of going . I would wear panties bra skinny jeans 4 inch stillettos and light makeup

    • #269500
      Stephanie Hayes
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      Registered On: December 14, 2019
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      Forging forward as always.  Continuing to love my wife and kids.  Dealing with increased pressures at work due to my colleague who had 40 years experience retiring, and now I, with 15 yeas experience, am training the next generation in my profession.  The cycle continues and the wheel always turns.  Ours is the Fury!

      I’m also enjoying the little things since re-discovering my enjoyment of CDing.  Like sitting here in my man lounge clothes with a sports bra on underneath and some ballet flats on my feet.  I love going all out when I can, but learning to appreciate the little things I suppose…

      -Steph

    • #269291
      Shipuu Williams
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      Hope to be able to wear more feminine clothes without hearing any bad criticism that is

    • #269185
      Phillysis Sanderson
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      Registered On: November 21, 2018
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      2020, getting better  at  increasing, my feminine side,  after being hidden, for  over  50  years

      HAPPY  NEW  YEAR

       

      LOVE

       

      Phillysis

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    • #268865
      Madelynn Fox
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      Registered On: September 6, 2019
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      Thank you for this question Vanessa!  For me, like many others, 2020 will be about exploring who Madelynn really is.  I love being open to my Venus side and getting more and more comfortable with the female me.  I, too, love my man side and woman side. Now, it is about being the best person I can be and opening up to all the possibilities both sides of me has to offer.

       

      Furry Hugs and kisses to all my sisters!

      Madelynn

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    • #267770
      Charlene Victoria
      Participant
      Registered On: November 29, 2016
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      Thank you Vanessa for the question. If you hadn’t asked it I would have never reflected on it and probably would have found 2020 to be much the same as previous years. Longing, wishing, praying, anquishing over, frustration, loneliness etc., etc., etc.

      But your question niggled at my soul since the initial time I read it. A desire is not realized unless a choice to realize it has been made. Without a goal progress does not happen.

      To say that my goals for 2020 include “others-be-d&\*ed” I coming out, I am going out public as me, I will shop en femme, see a therapist, start electrolysis, and for good measure start voice feminization is pie in the sky dreaming not much different then I am doing currently. I am confident in that approach, 2020 won’t be any different than 2017, 2018, 2019.

      However I have come miles since even the beginning of the year as some of my forum topics from earlier this month will attest.

      So laying that ground work here is what I will work toward achieving.

      1) I will spend much more time here at CDH. The time I have recently regularly  spent here has helped me be much more at peace with the femme personna of my being. So I think growth in my inner woman would profit by “hanging around here” more actively.

      2) Althea Lovelace has written an excellent forum topic about her / his coming to a deeper understanding of self. Once I thought I was an incurable trans-woman who could only be totally happy by transitioning. Not so sure any more. That I have a strong longing for womanhood is undeniable, but perhaps transition isn’t. I have decided to make 2020 a year of honest self discovery so I can move forward (or not) with sincere conviction and wonderful peace.

      3) lose weight. I am not totally sure; but I am fairly certain I could look very good in maternity clothes – about 8-9 months along. Though I have cried because I can’t carry and birth a child, at my age maternity clothes would not be age appropriate. So I am going to attack my weight, lose my unsightly gut. And whatever I learn from point #2,losing that weight  will be good for my health either way.

      4) Come out fully to my wife and work through what compromise may be necessary for her to be comfortable with at least some expression of my femme self. What would really be special at this point is to have her OK with my body being hairless, my toenails being painted, and her willing acceptance of me undersdressing in panties and a [ ta da – my own bra]

      Hugs to all. Thank you all for being such a wonderful sorority of like minded sisters. Here’s to a successful 2020. Yes!

    • #267625
      Hillary Skirt
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      Registered On: January 8, 2020
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      The New Year can be a time of introspection and an opportunity to examine your life path. During this time many folks decide to make changes in their fitness, diet, career or financial habits. Something unique to our community are goals related to gender presentation such as makeup, fashion, movement or voice, or perhaps walking further down the path of transition. Take a moment and let us know, Where are You Heading in 2020?

      If you are curious about the path to transition, whether you’re planning transition, or want to connect with those on that journey, I encourage you to join Transgender Heaven. It’s a safe, welcoming and supportive place for those on the journey towards transition.

      Thank you– Well I am headed to a freer 2020 – looking to investigate transitioning opportunities. I am gender fluid as diagnosed by my therapist and yet sometimes I would like something more. To be firmly a trans woman is emerging as a life aim. This means presenting as a woman within the terms of reference that are possible to me.

      I wish you all well this year.

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    • #267553
      DeeAnn Hopings
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      Registered On: November 10, 2019
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      V.L.:

      I’m caught up now on the responses to your thread and something occurred to me.

      I would encourage EVERYONE to do something this year to Push The Envelope! Now this doesn’t necessarily mean Strutting through your neighborhood in a scanty outfit with hooker heels, BUT, what it does mean if there is something that you would really like to do or accomplish, then give it some serious thought. Figure out what the “thing” is and then consider it.

      Two things: think about  what your fear is. Don’t just say: “I’m afraid to go out!?!?”. Think about the specifics, such as “What if I saw someone I knew?” or “Where would I go?” or “How would I know that I am dressed OK?” and so on. The second part is think about what you want to do in the context of not being fearful or worried. In other words, if you were free to get after what you want to do, what would that look like?

      I’m a retired mechanical engineer and there is an Old, Old Saying:

      “How do you eat and elephant? One spoonful at a time.”

      What that means is that when you are confronted with a large and complex problem, break it down to smaller, more manageable parts. It becomes less daunting that way. Further, as you deal with each one, it helps your confidence in tackling the next and the next and…

      Finally, I’ll leave a passage by Audre Lorde. Sad that she is no longer with us, but I encourage folks to check out her work. She left behind some amazing things. My favorite, and one that just cuts to the core <u>every</u> time is:

      ”When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.”

    • #267519
      JaiymeLynne
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      Registered On: March 2, 2016
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      Hi Vanessa,

      Thank you for this site and TDH as well. I’ve had many good conversations here with some wonderful ladies. This place is a sanctuary for us all. Especially those struggling with how far does it go…crossdressing to coming out to transitioning. Like me. I will continue to be a part this community and contribute how I can.

      For 2020 I plan to embark on a more healthy lifestyle. I have a new puppy keeping me on my toes; walking her gives me good exercise, which I will continue with my Planet Fitness membership. I want to work off some pounds, to get my body in shape, to be more presentable. I plan to continue exploring by keeping my body smooth and hairless, a big part of my dysphoria. I feel so much better without that awful hair all over my body. I’ve been waxed on my back and kept my legs and chest, tummy shaved. Electrolysis or laser is something I think about as well. I also would like to step out as JaiymeLynne this year, to meet others in my local LBGTQ community, to gain friends to help me continue my journey. To understand. As I accept myself it becomes easier. I love dressing and putting on makeup and looking pretty and feeling feminine. There’s no denying that. But this choice (is it a choice?) is daunting. That also must become clearer this year. To become JaiymeLynne, at least sometimes, but is it my truth? Or just a fetish? I am still struggling with the idea and is it worth it at this late stage of life. So many other things I wish to do that don’t involve transition, this seems to take all my energy, I can’t get focused on other parts of my life. So does that statement alone indicate that I am ready?  Focus on myself and all other parts fall in place? Family and friends and work somehow demand (without words, just the thought of coming out paralyzes me with fear and shame) that I stay in the closet. But again, she has taken over my mind and body and I am just afraid of losing so much of what I have gained. Sorry if this is weepy or dramatic, but it’s how I feel today. I must be a little selfish and brave and take baby steps along this journey of discovery. To live MY LIFE.

      So that’s my ramble about the year ahead. Thank you everyone who takes the time to read it. I appreciate you so much.

      JaiymeLynne

    • #267432
      Gigi Mathews
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      Registered On: July 16, 2019
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      I have been neglecting Gigi Vanessa due to time constraints lately (poor Girl). I plan on pampering the hell out of her this year.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #267259
      Leslies Ann Gray Girl
      Participant
      Registered On: September 22, 2017
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      Hi sweet ladies , what will this new year do , i wish i new . We so need to be excepted , loved , will it happen ? Some times i am so down , please , please , take care of your self . Some one loves you , you know they do . If i could leave gently i would , i so wish i could help all . There is no lady more precious than a trans lady .We are sweet , we are soft  , we are all some one needs for love .Enjoy the lady you are , i would bet someone will . Love , Leslie

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    • #267252
      Amy Myers
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      Registered On: February 11, 2019
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      One thing I’d really like to do this year, would some professional makeup, (for the second time), and then to have a photo shoot done afterwards.

      Amy

    • #267206
      Janice Emory
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      Registered On: August 14, 2019
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      Well said Cynthia. I am in the same boat with you. I truly love that I found this site to share with you and others.
      Luv
      Janice

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #267197
      skippy1965 Cynthia
      Ambassador
      Registered On: August 25, 2015
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      Amen Tiffany! I’ve come light years since I first timidly joined CDH way back in August of 2015. From someone who was shy introspective and hiding in the darkness to being out and about traveling the country on the Cynvasion tour visiting my many friends from the site. While I am still figuring out where my life will lead me, I am enjoying the journey as I continue to discover who I am and who I might become!
      And it’s all because of Vanessa’s decision to rebirth what was already a great blog site and make it the #1 support site for the entire CD/TG community in the world!!
      Cyn

    • #267112
      Patricia Marie Allen
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      Registered On: December 29, 2015
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      2020:  My plan is to keep on keeping on.  I’ve been out to my wife for 40 or so years.  (She walked in on me dressed… not a great way to come out.)  Over the years, she’s come to accept me as I am.  I difficult time for her and a process that has taken decades.  At this time she only has reservations regarding family and family friends that are still unaware of my feminine nature, but as for herself, it is what it is.  Can’t change it, so acceptance is the only other viable option.

      As to this year… I’ve been on a course of electrolysis for a couple of years now and I will continue on that course.  Only about 3 more years to go.  (Laser is not an option.  My beard has gone grey.  Laser doesn’t work on light colored hair.)  I’ve been on HRT for the same amount of time and will continue with that as well.

      The only thing new that is in the offing is looking into breast augmentation.  At present, Kaiser (my insurance carrier) won’t pay for that.  (Curiously enough, the would happily pay for SRS.)  Medicare will, however, pay some of the cost for it.  I need to find out just how much they will pay and what the actual cost will be and set up a plan to put the money together.  During that time, I need to convince my wife that it would be easier to explain her husband with what looks like gynecomastia than it is to explain a husband who wears a bra with breast forms; which I currently do 24/7.

      I will also consider coming out to selected member of my family, which should help to alleviate some of my wife’s concerns.

      But that’s about it.  Just keep on keeping on.

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #267082
      DeeAnn Hopings
      Participant
      Registered On: November 10, 2019
      Topics: 11
      Replies: 577
      Has thanked: 9 times
      Been thanked: 1341 times

      Tiffany:

      Glad that you talked about remaining part of the community. A while back I posted a thread/poll on TGH about this issue. While it doesn’t apply to me as I am not physically transitioning, I think it is VERY important for folks who are trying to sort their lives out to know that it is possible to start at one end, run the course, come out the other end and live the life to which they were destined. It isn’t a simple or easy process, but as is said, the longest journey begins with the first step…

    • #267047
      Carlie West
      Participant
      Registered On: January 1, 2020
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 2
      Has thanked: 2 times
      Been thanked: 7 times

      Hello everyone

      I came out to my wife of 30 years about my crossdressing in 2018. Since then she has been every helpful.  helping me with fashion and makeup allso with hairstyles. In 2020 I am working on becoming more passable as carlie. With help from my loving wife she has made dreams come true. In 2020 I am planning to go shopping as carlie for the first time. we have been out to night clubs together as carlie. But have not been shopping or to dinner.

      Hope everyone has s great 2020

      With love Carlie

       

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #266183
      Danielle Anaya
      Participant
      Registered On: January 3, 2020
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 9
      Has thanked: 1 time
      Been thanked: 48 times

      Health is priority one this year.  Not being born a girl, it has been hard enough maintaining the kind of body, weight and fitness I want and be as physically attractive and healthy as possible.  I have been hitting the beach a lot lately but I can see a little too much pudge going on, which is not good for someone my age anyway.  I don’t want to have to wear more concealing swimwear because I like to show a lot of skin.  A stricter diet, more exercise, and more age delaying skin and body rituals are for me.

    • #266166
      Marianne
      Ambassador
      Registered On: May 20, 2017
      Topics: 11
      Replies: 462
      Has thanked: 266 times
      Been thanked: 763 times

      Dear Vanessa,

      All my life, for nearly as long as i can remember (and my very first memory is from before the age of two) I have known I had a girl inside me wanting to come out and try her wings. About twelve years old I started secretly wearing my mother’s skirts and dresses, much later the clothes of my fiancé and wife and around the year 2000 I began gathering my own wardrobe wich is now quite extensive. In 2012, Marianne so made her true public debute and has since grown into a fully confident stylish woman, claiming her place and rightful share in most aspects of life.

      Ever since I first learnt that transitioning existed and was an actual possibility for “ordinary” girls like me, I have dreamt of walking down that path. Still I have held back, mainly because of the impact such a decision would have on my family. I’ve only done some small changes to please my female self, such as shaping my eyebrows, piercing my ears, loosing some weight to shape up my body and perhaps most importantfor my self image, achieving to build a small but unmistakable bust by long and frequent use of a breast pumping device. Last summer I finally took the important next step by contacting a psychologist about a gender identity evaluation, followed by an Application to the ANOVA gender clinic in Stockholm in September.

      What do I expect of 2020 then?

      Iin many ways this year is expected to be a celebration and jubilee, being 25 years since I graduated from the University, married my wonderful wife and started my present employment and also 20 years since the birth of our first child. Also this summer we have decided to spend a week at Krete in the Mediterranean sea on our second ever vacation trip outside Scandinavia (the first one was to London UK to see the Harry Potter exhibition a few years ago).

      On a personal level, I am looking forward to start seeing a gender therapist, probably sometime in the late spring. I hope being admitted to start treatments with laser and electrolysis to permanently remove my beard and other unwanted facial hair pretty soon after that. Must probably wait until after our trip though, not to risk skin damage from exposure to the intense sunlight. With only two or three ponds to go, I also hope being able to reach and maintain my goal weight of 150 lbs / 68 kg.

      Most of all I hope I will be able to keep fighting my progressing Parkinson’s disease, since about everything else in my life depends on my ability to work and stay reasonably healthy.

      Love and hugs to everyone

      Ellen Marianne Tornander

    • #265994
      Rozalyne Richards
      Participant
      Registered On: March 10, 2018
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 227
      Has thanked: 245 times
      Been thanked: 622 times

      Sometime in 2020 i hope to have a professional makeover with a professional photographer taking pictures, and I also have a wish to attend a venue near me and meet other cross-dresser’s and tvs and spend a whole night as Rozalyne, I’m not sure what else will happen though as I’m still married and still in the closet to my wife, we have had a few rough times over the last few years but our lives are at last starting to get back on track so I don’t want to upset the apple cart again by coming out to her just yet, i shall just have to wait and see how things are going x hugs Rozalyne x

    • #265980
      Anne Preuss
      Participant
      Registered On: December 13, 2018
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 460
      Has thanked: 702 times
      Been thanked: 905 times

      On the physical side of things, my goals for 2020 is to complete electrolysis on my face and neck and laser on the rest of me to finish that feminization aspect of me.  I also intend to lose a bit more weight to reach my goal of 145 lbs.    From an emotional/psychological perspective,  I intend to seek the services of a gender therapist to help me figure out where I need to continue on my journey.

    • #265968
      Alicen Thairms
      Participant
      Registered On: July 15, 2019
      Topics: 29
      Replies: 301
      Has thanked: 1056 times
      Been thanked: 649 times

      Continue with ‘living life as a woman, one slice at a time’ (even though they may be small slices) 🙂

      Maintain my ‘every day style’ wardrobe for all year round; I’ve a few things I would like to add – highest on the list are a couple of nice dresses, some jewelry, another handbag and nice coat.

      I’m planning some longer trips out too local nearby towns and have found a couple of new places to go for walks nearby which I’ll visit.

    • #265852
      DeeAnn Hopings
      Participant
      Registered On: November 10, 2019
      Topics: 11
      Replies: 577
      Has thanked: 9 times
      Been thanked: 1341 times

      I’ve ended being a board member and treasurer of 2 trans organizations in my area, as well as a steering committee member for our local HRC group.

      As of last Fall I’ve been working with Palm Springs Pride, the group that puts on Palm Springs Pride (1st weekend of November), as Volunteer Coordinator. That has a high probability of continuing. I’m also trying to put together a series of motorsports podcasts aimed at the LGBT population. And YES, there are gay and trans drivers out there and probably team members and engineers also.

      I’ve become involved with the local lesbian community and have met a number of Very interesting women this past year. I was part of a panel discussion this past Fall during Palm Springs Women’s Week. Hopefully I’ll get asked to do some other things.

      My wife and I may become involved with the local disability community. We are both differently abled. She suffered a spinal cord injury 11 years ago. I’ve had arthritis since childhood and had a mild stroke 3 years ago. We’ll see how that works.

      Personally I’m looking forward to making it to more motorsports events this year. So far, due to schedule clashes and obligations, I was only able to make it to the Long Beach Grand Prix weekend once in the 4 years that I’ve been here. That has GOT TO CHANGE!! There are MANY other events here that I’m missing!!

      As a trans person, I think one of the most important things that I can do is Be Out There. I am not physically transitioning, but my social transition is essentially complete.

      Time to Keep On…

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #265830
      Bobbi
      Participant
      Registered On: September 13, 2018
      Topics: 26
      Replies: 1444
      Has thanked: 1553 times
      Been thanked: 3345 times

      2020 is going to be a great year!
      & will be for anybody with a positive attitude. CDH has given a lot of girls a safe place to share their hopes, their dreams, their aspirations, and make new friends. CDH has empowered many girls to step out into the light & be themselves!

      6 users thanked author for this post.
      • #266163
        Stephanie Aston
        Participant
        Registered On: May 31, 2018
        Topics: 1
        Replies: 19
        Has thanked: 45 times
        Been thanked: 80 times

        Hi Bobbi

        I can’t agree more, unfortunately since joining CDH I’ve been through some difficult times but being here has given me a fantastic place to be ME, the support and kindness I’ve had from many lovely ladies here cannot be underestimated. Going forward now with so much more confidence  I’m really looking forward to 2020 and all it has to offer (and all I can make happen) 😀

        love Stephanie xx

    • #265606
      Michelle Liefde
      Ambassador
      Registered On: May 27, 2018
      Topics: 53
      Replies: 1176
      Has thanked: 1792 times
      Been thanked: 1471 times

      Happy New Year, Vanessa!  And a Happy New Year to our amazing community! The biggest part of my plans this year beside turning the big 50 in May is that  my SO and I are planning on attending Keystone in March.  It will be my first time out as Michelle and I cannot think of a better place than among so many of the friends made here.  Though must admit to being extremely nervous but looking forward to going.

      Also, I am hoping to further understand and accept where this is all taking me and on a lighter note, get better at applying makeup.

      hugs,

      Michelle

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #265578
      Jin Crocker
      Participant
      Registered On: November 15, 2019
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 260
      Has thanked: 26 times
      Been thanked: 596 times

      Retirement is here. Included in my 2020 goals are bikini tanlines in my new boat!

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #265521
      Danielle Wayne
      Participant
      Registered On: December 2, 2017
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 9
      Has thanked: 2 times
      Been thanked: 60 times

      Hi Vanessa

      2019 was a whirlwind year for me. Coming out to my wife and then my daughter. Both have acceptance and me a little more at peace. I could not have done it without the support of all the girls here on CDH.

      Now for 2020. I am goingto continue my journey of set acceptance within myself. All those years of being ashamed of who I was will take some confidence in myself and lots of encouragement from my sister’s here.

      My second goal is to help my wife to feel even more comfortable with my femme side and to know my femme side is no threat, as she is number 1.

      So here’s to a good year in 2020. And with the great support group here, I know I can achieve these goals

      God bless and love ya all

      Danielle

       

       

    • #265380
      Janice Emory
      Participant
      Registered On: August 14, 2019
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 31
      Has thanked: 22 times
      Been thanked: 74 times

      Hi Vanessa and everyone. Since coming out in 2017 I have had a whirlwind experience; joining trans groups and attending trans conferences, practicing makeup skills, establishing my style and making great CD friends. I am so blessed to live in a community where Janice is accepted wherever she goes. Medical problems in 2019 slowed my lifestyle a bit but I am finally closing this chapter and looking forward to 2020 as a positive year with more social activities, ear piercing, Manny Peddy skills, voice training and deportment so I don’t appear as a flagrant gay person. I just want to be my true feminine self. Thanks for asking.

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #265360
      Amy Myers
      Participant
      Registered On: February 11, 2019
      Topics: 14
      Replies: 1032
      Has thanked: 2592 times
      Been thanked: 2431 times

      Vanessa;

      I’d also like to say thank you for your vision in creating this site, and thanks to all the other behind the scenes people that must be there to make this work like it does.

      Being here has helped me immensely. Before then I was an occasional dresser, and then felt the pull to dress more often, and then completely en femme. It was then I found CDH, being here has helped me to accept and enjoy being Amy. I was also able to sort out my feelings, and though I am a cross dresser, and I don’t believe that I will ever want to transition. Also, I’ve made many friends here, and even have meet some in person.

      I know I haven’t answered your question, yet.

      The last year was an incredible growth year for me, I went from a closet dresser, and not very passable, to now going out for lunch, dinner, and shopping en femme at malls.

      This year I hope to expand my femme horizons even more by going out more often, and perhaps even going away for a few days somewhere, totally en femme. To live for a few days as a woman would be a fabulous experience I think.

      Amy

    • #265354
      Amy Myers
      Participant
      Registered On: February 11, 2019
      Topics: 14
      Replies: 1032
      Has thanked: 2592 times
      Been thanked: 2431 times

      Breanna, I wish you well, and hope your surgeries go well this year.

      Amy

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #265333
      Bettylou Cox
      Participant
      Registered On: May 26, 2019
      Topics: 16
      Replies: 1428
      Has thanked: 2313 times
      Been thanked: 4242 times

      Vanessa,
      Since I found CDH this year, I’ve gone from closeted underdresser to full CD, complete with makeovers, wardrobe and pierced ears; Thank you, thank you, thank you. Still pending are makeup skills and voice training, and I really want to mix and mingle with other CDs – but a disabled wife severely limits my travel options. Not giving up on that, yet, however.
      Hugs,
      Bettylou

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #265327
      Paula F
      Participant
      Registered On: August 7, 2019
      Topics: 11
      Replies: 580
      Has thanked: 992 times
      Been thanked: 2023 times

      Next month, on Valentines day actually, will mark three years since they took my tumor, among a few other things, from my body and set me on the road to recovery.  I don’t think I have ever been so grateful for 3 more years at any time in my life.

      I would like to take that huge step and begin transition to becoming the woman I feel I need to be.  I have begun seeing a counselor since the new years, again ( not the first time), I have some very huge decisions to make for myself now.  I will put that on hold for just a bit though as my youngest niece is planning to throw a ‘surprise’ 3rd life day party for me.  My sister snitched her off to make sure I was going to be home that night.

      I cannot foresee what this next year will hold, but I do know I am going to declare myself to my boss and coworkers about my gender identity.  I am so tired of hiding it from people who really should know to keep odd rumors (this is small town Texas after all) from causing any damage.

      PaulaF

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #265300
      K Swim
      Participant
      Registered On: July 8, 2019
      Topics: 11
      Replies: 617
      Has thanked: 308 times
      Been thanked: 1126 times

      I’ve never done the “new year resolution” thing because I feel that if I want to start something, I start right away and don’t create a deadline to stress myself with.

      In this case, I am gradually preparing to move. Since I got out of the military, I stuck around the Nebraska and got a job as a DoD contractor because my experience and qualifications made it easy. Recently I started to wonder if I should have just left and moved back down south where I came from. I’m done thinking about it. I found an opportunity early last month that will ensure I am not stuck job hunting when I do. I don’t think I will complete that process this year, but I do plan to complete it….hence why I don’t make a new year resolution. Right now, hiding my love for wearing women’s swimsuits is the only thing I stress myself with. Plus I know I could have more warm days in the year than living in Nebraska.

    • #265187
      Celeste Starre
      Participant
      Registered On: June 26, 2018
      Topics: 25
      Replies: 566
      Has thanked: 141 times
      Been thanked: 1471 times

      I’m heading toward enjoying my CDing even more if that’s possible.

    • #265125
      Angela
      Participant
      Registered On: August 27, 2019
      Topics: 9
      Replies: 124
      Has thanked: 240 times
      Been thanked: 352 times

      Hi Vanessa,

      For me this year may be difficult but I’m willing to take on the challenge. First is getting healthier by continuing to lose weight. This site helped me get the courage to get professional help. That helped me realize I’m transgender. Now it will be coming out to my family. I dont know what will happen but I need to live my authentic life.

      Hugs,

      Angela

    • #265114
      DeLora
      Participant
      Registered On: October 15, 2019
      Topics: 58
      Replies: 278
      Has thanked: 888 times
      Been thanked: 1448 times

      Since I am still pretty new to actually acknowledging me femme side my goals are pretty basic.
      -Build a collection of outfits that I feel confident in, things I could wear in public and blend in.
      -Pluck up the courage to shave the last of my beard.
      -Learn to do my makeup.
      -Alow my wife to see me and spend the with me fully enfemme.
      -Venture out in public enfemme.

      -Decide who else I am going to come out to
      -Find some local CDs and try to form a group/club. There currently is not one that I am aware of.

      Thanks to my time spent on CDH I am confident that I am not trans, I cherish both the male and female aspects of my personality, so I’ll not be going on a trans journey, but I do still need to explore my femininity and find the balance that makes me happy, not quite there yet. I think achieving the goals above will help me figure this out.

      All the best for 2020.

      D.

    • #265084
      patty williams
      Participant
      Registered On: January 19, 2019
      Topics: 62
      Replies: 1131
      Has thanked: 1749 times
      Been thanked: 3670 times

      Hi Vanessa,
      Good question, I hope to get settled better in our new house after we get our old one sold (what a headache that is).
      I really would like to have a little more girl time this year and meet new friends and enjoy the friends I have met here on CDH.

      I would like tp say my challenges in 2020 do not hold a candle to Breannas.
      My prayers are with you hon.

      Karley
      I am sorry you lost a friend, I had a similar experience this year and I found out how bad it hurts.

      Patty

    • #265061
      Breanna Leigh
      Participant
      Registered On: November 30, 2018
      Topics: 33
      Replies: 429
      Has thanked: 330 times
      Been thanked: 1162 times

      My original plan for 2020 was to transition in June 2020, once I had better than one year on HRT. Unfortunately for me, I can no longer achieve my goal due to illness, inability to work and I have spent my SRS savings on living expenses over the past 7 months. And without a miracle, I doubt I will be able to come up with the money to keep my original date. My open heart surgery was postponed from November 2019 to January 2020 so that will be my first challenge this year and once that is over and I’m able to get back to work, it will be save, save, save, again, for my transition. Originally, Dr Ley at The Meltzer Clinic here in Arizona was doing my surgeries but I may opt for a plane ticket to Thailand to save money. I have considered selling my house to pay for my surgeries, since I no longer have a mortgage, if I sold, I would walk away with more than enough cash for surgery and another, smaller home. But I worked my butt off for what I have and I would really hate to loose it!! If I could only find a genie in a bottle that would give me three wishes!! LoL

      P.S. I am a member at Transgender Heaven as well.

      Hugs and Best of Luck to everyone in the coming new year!!! Breanna

      • #265069
        Bettylou Cox
        Participant
        Registered On: May 26, 2019
        Topics: 16
        Replies: 1428
        Has thanked: 2313 times
        Been thanked: 4242 times

        Breanna,
        I wish you the best for your forthcoming surgery; I had a quad bypass in October 2012, and a year-long recovery. I have heard (but may be wrong) that major surgery such as this means a permanent disqualification for SRS. Please check this out before planning something as drastic as selling the homestead.
        Hugs,
        Bettylou

        4 users thanked author for this post.
        • #265311
          Breanna Leigh
          Participant
          Registered On: November 30, 2018
          Topics: 33
          Replies: 429
          Has thanked: 330 times
          Been thanked: 1162 times

          Hi Betty Lou,

          Thank you Hon for your insight and advise. But I must tell you that the first thing I did was contact my SRS doctor to ask that question. As long as I have good blood flow, I pass the blood tests, and my surgery is successful, they will still do SRS. I am fortunate in a way because I am a cash pay and they are not making me jump all the WPATH hoops insurance requires. I was offered two surgery dates already,one in August 2019 or November 2019, but I wanted to see what kind of breast development I got from the hormones since I am doing top surgery at the same time as bottom surgery, to save money on the anesthesiologist and hospital bills. Maybe someone up there was looking out for me, if I had done surgery in 2019, I may not have made it with a bad valve in my heart!! Thanks, Breanna

          1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #265035
      karley delaware
      Participant
      Registered On: October 23, 2017
      Topics: 9
      Replies: 370
      Has thanked: 1525 times
      Been thanked: 874 times

      Hello Vanessa, I am Very Happy for the chance to write to you directly.  THANK YOU for your COURAGE and VISION in creating this site CDH.  This girl has been helped in so many ways after stumbling onto the site in a state of self-hate, guilt, and depression in 2017.   I moved  from an occasional curious guest to Lady then Baroness.   It has been an exhilarating ride of personal evolution from one that was very secretive and  paranoid to one that enjoys dressing and spending time as a girl like people would enjoy time spent going to a movie, dinner or a vacation. It has evolved from a purely sexual fetish to one that explores my femme side more deeply, the sensitive sides of me seeing trying to view  life as a woman ld, enjoying small things like feeling the hair on my bare back, making me feel pretty and alive,   giving loving hugs and kisses in public to my dogs, something girls  can do but not boys. Then there was the heartbreak of losing a friend here at CDH. The girls here were so nice to me with words of support and advice that girls here will leave because CDrs are a skittish lot and leaving had nothing to do with me.  It still hurts. Being a girl is not all smiles right?  That girl opened my mind to the fact that I am bi-sexual.  I got a taste of what a girls hurt feels like……    While still in the closet, this year I want to actually go and buy clothes in person at the thrift stores, go for drives en femme at night, post more pictures, and be 60/40 femme/male.   Although I feel pretty and desirable, most everyone would have to put on their dirty, out of date prescription glasses to see that….:)

    • #264923
      Lucinda Hawkns
      Participant
      Registered On: September 1, 2015
      Topics: 6
      Replies: 1157
      Has thanked: 74 times
      Been thanked: 1096 times

      Well good question  Vanessa law,   I am looking at taking care of my Heath, getting wife to under stand my desire to x dress. Enjoy my life as it is and be all I can be male and female, female when I can and enjoy it. Learning to put on eye shadow a lot better and learn to put on foundation, and cover up make up and look as pretty as a real female and pass as one.  I am a thin person to begin with.    Being here on C.D.H.   I will learn more about make up and try on and the more I do the better I will get at it.   I guess that covers my where are you going in 2020

    • #273255
      Rebecca Rigg
      Participant
      Registered On: January 27, 2020
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 36
      Has thanked: 58 times
      Been thanked: 85 times

      Well however my first time out goes I’ve got to try.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #273160
      Anonymous
      Inactive
      Registered On:
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 199
      Has thanked: 435 times
      Been thanked: 495 times

      Hiya, I know exactly how you feel going out as your female self is scary but pure exhilaration when it goes ok. A lot of people say I look good but you are never sure in yourself, best of luck. Hugs Sandra xxx

      4 users thanked author for this post.
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