- September 5, 2015 at 10:25 pm #6439Vanessa LawFounderRegistered On: April 19, 2012Topics: 80Replies: 158Has thanked: 42 timesBeen thanked: 631 times
Megan left me a lovely note this evening, that got me thinking how much more we are than the label ‘transgender’ or ‘crossdresser’.
We are doctors and painters and engineers. Mothers and daughters, lovers and confidants.
We are people, some trapped in the wrong body longing to get out, others with a duality that brings them joy.
We have fears, and triumphs. We experience love and loss. We hope, we dream. We are human.
Who are you, when your identity is not confined to be transgender?
Total of 131 users thanked author for this post. Here are last 20 listed.
- June 19, 2022 at 7:14 am #654131
- June 19, 2022 at 5:51 am #654118BobbiJo CLadyRegistered On: March 29, 2022Topics: 2Replies: 20Has thanked: 75 timesBeen thanked: 83 times
I’m a father of 3,grandfather of 14, husband of 46 years, electrician for 48 yrs, contractor for 30 yrs, scout leader for 25 yrs, baseball coach for 10 yrs, church member for 64 yrs, mentor, and now have started transitioning after a very long journey with the SUPPORT OF ALL OF MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS.
Otherwise perfectly normal.
- March 16, 2022 at 9:53 am #629270Michelle McQueenLadyRegistered On: June 14, 2021Topics: 29Replies: 1672Has thanked: 11567 timesBeen thanked: 8328 times
I’m retired from being a self employed residential homebuilder/remodeler and having a couple other side businesses over the years. I wasn’t always self employed although that was the majority of my work history but I think I had an interesting history that included being in the military, a branch manager, a law enforcement officer, a delivery truck driver, a home inspector, a prison guard, and a custom furniture builder. I’m very happy to be retired now and having the time to explore what has been living inside me all my life… a girl who just wanted to be herself. I am thankful I don’t have to run in the hectic, competitive, rat race every day… life is good… now back to my nap.
- March 14, 2022 at 10:12 am #628891Kim DahlenbergenLadyRegistered On: November 18, 2019Topics: 1Replies: 240Has thanked: 204 timesBeen thanked: 828 times
Yes, we are a diverse group. I have spent most of my adult life as an administrator in government, academic, health care and non-profit organizations.
1 user thanked author for this post.
- March 13, 2022 at 11:04 am #628677Brandy CeedeeLadyRegistered On: December 21, 2021Topics: 0Replies: 7Has thanked: 17 timesBeen thanked: 40 times
I am a retired tow truck/truck driver from Vermont now living in Florida. For years I kept my fetish for women’s lingerie and clothing confined to wearing nightgowns. Now you will find me dressed in panties under my work clothes running a chainsaw, working on my ’51 Chevy, and remodeling our house. In the evening I get dressed totally enfemme from dinner time to bed. I love that I have shed the burden of having to claim to be of one gender or the other, and go with whatever personna I fell like. I only wish my wife and I felt comfortable with going out in public.
- February 14, 2022 at 5:33 pm #621754KimmieLadyRegistered On: September 27, 2016Topics: 4Replies: 281Has thanked: 195 timesBeen thanked: 1281 times
- February 12, 2022 at 4:18 am #620689Danielle AnayaLadyRegistered On: January 3, 2020Topics: 14Replies: 106Has thanked: 84 timesBeen thanked: 818 times
I would say I am just another imperfect human being on this road called life, trying to be the best human I can be without harming others. I try to be the best friend, relative, co-worker, employee, or girlfriend I can be, and hopefully make the lives of those I come into contact with a little better. I don’t always achieve these goals, but I do try as much as I can.
- February 8, 2022 at 10:03 am #619479AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
- February 1, 2022 at 4:58 am #617139Lacy SatinLadyRegistered On: June 27, 2018Topics: 7Replies: 481Has thanked: 442 timesBeen thanked: 2315 times
I’m just your normal everyday guy who is more sensitive and emotional than probably most men. I work hard to provide for my family as to be expected.
The only thing that makes me different on a daily basis is I always wear feminine undergarments.
- March 13, 2022 at 1:25 pm #628703
- January 30, 2022 at 8:16 pm #616752Lauren MugnaiaDuchessRegistered On: November 1, 2021Topics: 19Replies: 509Has thanked: 7334 timesBeen thanked: 2799 times
I have always been a sensitive artistic person and have been a writer, poet, musician, photographer, graphic artist and an art teacher. In school I was never good at sports but the one always called upon to do posters, murals or any other project that involved art. I love music and am easily moved to tears by it, I will be found weeping during some part of a movie and actually love chick flicks. I’ll take any one of those over a typical action thriller. I don’t have a macho bone or muscle anywhere in my body! I have successfully raised two children and had a wonderful lengthy marriage with a beautiful and understanding wife that was brought to an end by cancer. I remarried several years ago but she has difficulty understanding the needs of somebody who is considered transgender. So I soldier on and find solace in my femininity and spend a lot of time with my art and music.
- April 6, 2021 at 2:34 am #474289Cynthia DuboisLadyRegistered On: August 17, 2017Topics: 13Replies: 75Has thanked: 74 timesBeen thanked: 387 times
Leaving gender completely out of it, I am a humanist, an atheist, an anthropologist, an activist, and a musician. I am a humanist because I prefer to live a life, to paraphrase the Humanist Manifesto- without supernaturalism, that stresses human agency, and affirms our ability and responsibility to lead ethical lives of personal fulfillment that aspire to the greater good of humanity.
I am an atheist because of this philosophy, and because I see no need to believe in the supernatural or religion when science is more than adequate for explaining the world and everything in it. I also see no proof that you have to have religion to be moral or to be a good and just person. Morality and goodness are not the sole domain of religion.
I am an anthropologist by schooling and by temperment. I celebrate and embrace the differences in people. I abhor xenophobia, racism, sexism, and all forms of ethnocentrism. I believe cultural relativity is key to understanding others. I see value in exploring other cultures and worldviews, and how they handle their lives.
I am an activist because I don’t believe problems get solved by being ignored or thinking that “it’s really not my place to say or do something.” It is our place to do what we can, as much as we can, to as many as we can to address the problems of the world.
I am a musician because I see music as a universal language, and as a form of self expression that can express emotions and thoughts like no other art form. Music is a part of the natural world that humans have elaborated on and created a uniquely human form that can give expression to our inner mind. The power of music is about the closest thing to the supernatural that I believe in.
I am also someone with a deep sense of curiosity, a driving need to help others, a strong sense of morality, a believer in the power of humor, and a seeker of truth. I like to think I’m a well rounded woman.
- April 5, 2021 at 2:24 am #473869AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
- April 4, 2021 at 9:51 pm #473820Quinetta HarrisLadyRegistered On: January 9, 2021Topics: 10Replies: 123Has thanked: 244 timesBeen thanked: 437 times
First off, I so love this article and I wish there were more articles like this one. My situation is definitely the duality version. All my life my male identity was dominant throughout my life, but then there were pockets and sections sprinkled throughout where someone else in me showed that they were present. No nothing like being bipolar or having a split personality (maybe split personality lol), just another aspect of me shining through. To keep this brief, it wasn’t until the summer of 2020 where doing extreme quarantining gave me the opportunity to really look inward at who or what was this second being of me. It was then that I found Quinetta, and once I did a lot of questions were answered. For example, my male identity (and I as well) both enjoy the female body but not just the physical attraction of wanting them but the attraction of wanting their body as my own. The latter I realized was me Quinetta throwing in my two cents every time a pretty woman crossed my eyes. Not just in person but in magazines and TV/Movies. So now when I am the primary and my male identity is paused, I appreciate and study a woman’s body I find attractive not just because I would like to be intimate with her ( because Quinetta is pansexual;) ), but also to compare hers to mine and see how much difference there is. See if I could wear the same types of clothes and get the same effect (or affect?) on my body.
So to sum things up, myself and my male identity have to share time so both remain happy. If one goes too long without enough primary time I can feel that things would turn up bad. Just know that every time I am on here my male identity knows to go sit the fuck down somewhere and wait until I am done lol.
Kisses…I love each and every one of you…
- April 4, 2021 at 10:46 pm #473829Lexy MitchellLadyRegistered On: April 5, 2021Topics: 1Replies: 5Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 35 times
Your situation is so much like mine … my thought is to feminize myself such as shaving legs and of course to begin to acquire panties and hose and undergarments I can safely wear underneath male clothes …
- November 10, 2020 at 2:30 pm #405134Casey Amber TwitchingsLadyRegistered On: May 15, 2020Topics: 36Replies: 326Has thanked: 310 timesBeen thanked: 1226 times
OK, whenever someone asks “who are you” all I can think of is Anthony Michael Hall in The Breakfast Club. “Who are you? Who are you?” And he was so serious.
Anywho, I’ve worn a few different hats in my 52 years. I’ve been an assistant manager of a sporting goods store, a legal messenger, and a webmaster. Right now I’m a poet who’s looking to get something published in a poetry magazine and eventually self publish a book of poems. Preferably my own since the government takes a dim view of plagerism.
I’m a son, a brother, and an uncle. I’m a friend and a cantor at church. I’m someone who lives daily with bipolar disorder and diabetes. I have character flaws that I’m trying to work on.
I know what you meant but I don’t feel confined to a transgender identity. Yes I’m transgendered but that’s only one piece of who I am. I’m not a poet, I’m not a diabetic, I’m not a brother. Those are all equal parts of me. For me to emphasize one at the expense of the others just feels wrong to me somehow, you know?
- November 10, 2020 at 6:10 am #404932MichelleLadyRegistered On: October 14, 2020Topics: 1Replies: 35Has thanked: 12 timesBeen thanked: 194 times
I love this thread and the responses. First of all I am a husband of almost 19 years. I am the father of 3 wonderful sons that are growing into their own paths to life. I am a carpenter by trade, with over 20 years of home building experience. I am a wood worker, locksmith, painter and general tinkerer. I love nature, I love riding ATVs with my wife, I love shooting, and model trains. I am happiest when I am doing things for others, although it takes a little prodding sometimes. I try to be generous but don’t always succeed. I am a crossdresser from a very early age, sometimes very ashamed of it, now I own it. I believe each and every one of us has a challenge to make our tomorrows easier for those that come after us. Each of us were given this great challenge because each and every one of us has the strength to take it on.
- November 9, 2020 at 8:09 pm #404797DeeAnn HopingsDuchessRegistered On: November 10, 2019Topics: 11Replies: 950Has thanked: 9 timesBeen thanked: 2656 times
I just reread my response from some time ago and, while I wouldn’t change anything, I would add this…
I don’t believe myself to be confined. Actually, just the opposite. The discovery of my true gender identity has been liberating. I am not confined by trying to be somebody that I wasn’t. I’ve allowed myself to be me…
- November 9, 2020 at 6:06 pm #404757AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
I’ve always been sort of a man’s man….a problem solver, the guy you call when the job had to get done, welder, mechanic, etc….
I’ve never understood my attraction to wearing women’s clothes but it’s something that has been with me for most of my 50+ years. It’s only been recently that I’ve really started to be ok with ALL of who I am.
Honestly, the drab guy side of me got to be pretty boring. I’ve pretty much mastered my career choice, I’ve reached many of the goals I once had and I really sort of ran out of challenges. Now, my challenge is to discover the different facets of myself so I can enjoy and grow them to become a more complete person. I am happy as a man and I’ll probably never want to transition to a woman but there is a definite duality to me that always frightened me until now.
When I embraced this feminine side of myself, I began to feel more whole and complete than I ever have. She was starving for love and acceptance but never again. I know Kristin will always be an important part of who I am.
Hugs to everyone
- November 8, 2020 at 12:27 pm #404261AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
An excellent very interesting post I am a total defined crossdresser. I have been in the closet now for forty years. I can’t see myself ever coming out, my wife has always appeared intolerant towards CD’s & Trans. Job to know how she would react if I told her due to amount of time I’ve
been in secret. I am very happy to called a crossdresser and proud of it, I have not came out because I really don’t want the ill feeling between us. My wife only knows my male side a highly skilled technician and successful sportsman. However the people that aspire me most are all female, really doubtful how she would react to find out her husband, prefers everything feminine in life and has a bigger female wardrobe than her. Anyway I am a Crossdresser who is very happy with herself.
I love all of you Ladies. Sarah xxxx
- November 8, 2020 at 11:08 am #404248rdroseLadyRegistered On: August 15, 2020Topics: 1Replies: 3Has thanked: 21 timesBeen thanked: 19 times
I’m not proud of my live. It start seeing girl clothes and i became the crossdresser who many people surching for. Many of the girls gets offended but, believe me, and i really think this is true, if we all find ourselfs strying female clothes, because something call us, something pulls “the other girls” ( a few or many, i don’t now) to try, (i was, i am) the stuff that you don’t want to be associated. Its a problem if a girl get the mind trapped there. If that happens, it’s just because their minds are 100% in the sex part. The clothes, felling pretty, is not there. Not love, just sex. Many mens surch this. Its not a clean path. It feels an explosion of pleasure this way, but after a wild, when i comeback to real life, i feel some kind of emptyness. Its not easy to switch my mind. If many girls expect the end of the day to put a shoe, a skirt or makeup, whith a smile in their hearts, many of us loose that train somewhere, and its not easy to get back on the track. Not long time ago,i feel just perfect to dressed up and seeing girls in their outfits. But i’ve seen movies….. and i have to try.
I do not now if i can express my thougts and fellings in a way that you understand me.
Every girl, every person, wants to be happy. I belive some girls just want to put some kinky clothes and have sex. Hetero or homo, don’t metter at all. And they rich their gold with that. Put the videos on the internet its a kind of exciting. I put one once and i take him off in the next minute. Thrill.
I do not want, and i can not do that, justify the actions of all girls but the other girls find their way to express their feminine side in a way that many girls can not find their mirror in those girls. Some have no chance to choose. The doors closed in the “normal life”. Porn and prostitution open that door.
If i do not feel strong enougth, to put a outfit and go out, what do you think of many of this girls of the underworld ( or not that deep) to get free and go in the Wright way. Others do no wanted.
I think in the end of all, i just trying to convince myself theres no wrong paths. I’m on nogirls land. I do like to feel just feminine when i dresse up and just walk in my room feeling good and well dressed. In the same coin i have thougts, feelings that is no compatible with the way of living of a lady.
I do not know what to write more,just trying not judge in the some way that you not want to be judge. Women and gays still have problems in the day by day to get accepted. Many of the girls stands up and fight.Many others do not pick that fight. The fear wins.
Trully from the heart.
I do not think that is a just
- July 9, 2020 at 7:03 am #362081Nick LacroixLadyRegistered On: February 3, 2020Topics: 20Replies: 176Has thanked: 147 timesBeen thanked: 680 times
I’m just an average woman trying to make something of myself. I’m not sure whether I fall under transgender or just regular crossdresser.
- July 5, 2020 at 6:08 am #360851KellyLadyRegistered On: April 8, 2020Topics: 3Replies: 51Has thanked: 1428 timesBeen thanked: 233 times
Great topic, it helps me to get to know more about my sisters.
I’m the dad to “several” adult children, and one younger child. Been with my third, and current wife for 12 years. I am currently in outside sales, which doesn’t really lend itself for being Kayla. I am 59 years old, and have accepted myself as a bi gender. I am comfortable as a male, but am most happy and joyful as Kayla. My wife has know of my crossdressing (and supportive)for 10+ years, but just recently I came out to her and two of my kids as bi gender. My wife is not as enthusiastic about it as I had hoped, but my two kids are highly supportive of me being me, whatever that may look like. I have no plan to transition, although I would love to have breast (I often read about ways to develop them, and dream about having my own). I have never gone out en femm fully, but plan too at some point. I love makeup, as well as looking and dressing like a lady and will soon be getting a makeover.
Above all else, I am just who I am.
Peace and love ladies,
- April 30, 2020 at 11:19 pm #339910Celeste JoLadyRegistered On: April 26, 2020Topics: 9Replies: 42Has thanked: 39 timesBeen thanked: 304 times
I am a father to a blind adopted son, husband and best friend to my wife, someone who ensures the safety of the public and coworkers my job. A 42 year old who is comfortable with myself and my place in the world.
- April 12, 2020 at 8:14 pm #334332ChloeCDuchessRegistered On: November 5, 2019Topics: 14Replies: 630Has thanked: 2361 timesBeen thanked: 3010 times
I’m a VietNam era veteran, retired user application programmer and project engineer, former air traffic controller, married twice, the second time passing 40 years now, father of 3 adult children, 2 married each with a boy and girl, although almost a generation separates these cousins (the oldest two are in college). Yeah, OK Boomer is me! I’ve changed infant diapers off and on for over 45 years, the latest time a month ago. I enjoy alpine skiing, golf, hiking, biking, kayaking, traveling, doing outreach programs for a non-profit I belong to. I really like bar team trivia contests (our team finished 2<sup>nd</sup> in the state a year or so ago) I’ve been a cross-dresser practically all my remembered life thinking seriously early on of transitioning, but decided not to. I write tg fiction which is online. I shared my ‘secret’ with my spouse, but we don’t discuss it, and I dress in private. I absolutely love my wife, my children, and my grandchildren, and for some reason, they all seem to like me.
Total of 21 users thanked author for this post. Here are last 20 listed.
- March 16, 2022 at 9:21 am #629266
- April 12, 2020 at 1:29 pm #334143Jessica Scarlett RayLadyRegistered On: January 20, 2020Topics: 1Replies: 37Has thanked: 36 timesBeen thanked: 129 times
My name is Jessaca Scarlett I am almost 55 and although I was a cross dresser for 42 years, in a prison of my own making , I have now moved on to become transgender and dress and act female 24/7. We live in West Wales on a small holding with 4 dogs and 2 rescue horses. While not totally self sufficient we could be.
I am sure we all question should we transition? What drives us to the next level? Let’s say there are so many questions we ask ourselves before we “come out” and actually become the person inside who has screamed and screamed.
Lets continue! I am a carer for my partner of 26 years Pamela. Before that I had trained as a professional dance teacher and became a Fellow in my own Society (I retired with a repetitive strain injury) I still dance now, not expecting to, and have my own studio. Before that I was a Postmasters son working on counter service for 20 years. Spent some time with BT and moved on.
So apart from Ballroom and Latin dancing what are my hobbies. I ride horses when we have one rideable and also I am a Class A radio Amateur. I spend a lot of time doing ground duties . We don’t have any tractors So the donkeys me pulling the trailer. It all sounds very physical but I know when I transition some things I may not be able to do.
What does the future hold? I am now retired but working still very hard by choice on site. I will be going private to initiate my hormone therapy after the virus as receded. I am already on the 2 year waiting list to see the gender clinic so one day I might get an appointment. Where off on are holidays when it’s allowed and maybe down size in the next few years.
Why am I transitioning!? I suppose I have always known I have been different. Not mixing in male company easily? Always wanting to choose the girls choice? Giving rather than taking? Wanting to wear and choose female clothing! Make up and nail varnish smell Devine. It’s no good being the best man at the dance when you want to be the best girl??
Why fight the personality within when she has your best interests at heart.
- March 29, 2020 at 7:39 am #330063Dawna Renea DayLadyRegistered On: February 13, 2020Topics: 2Replies: 67Has thanked: 312 timesBeen thanked: 304 times
I am a retired husband, father, and grandfather, three adult children and one grandchild. I’m 67 years old and my secret is known only here on CDH with no plans to transition further.
After retiring from being a bread vendor and Teamster driver I spend time at our mountain property chopping wood, hiking and fishing. Being a grandfather takes front seat a lot and family and church time is a priority. I play a banjo and am taking lessons(because I have time now!).
I’m happy being male but I have a feminine side that I have nurtured for most of my life. Being able to dress up helps to make me feel that I am just a person, one with emotions, empathy and compassion. Thanks
- March 29, 2020 at 5:51 am #330033Traci Lynn SmithLadyRegistered On: January 8, 2020Topics: 2Replies: 5Has thanked: 7 timesBeen thanked: 43 times
Love the question and the responces!
I am first a father to triplet 2 year olds, thats my superpower as well. Have 2 grown daughters, a 16 year old step son that has been part of my life since the age of 4. A husband, a brother, and generally a nice guy. I was a combat engineer in the Army, a drill Sergeant, Air assault, and veteran of the gulf war. Retired after 20 years. Sports fanatic, hockey player, Tae Kwon Do blackbelt. And much more.
But now I am happily Transitioning to become Traci Lynn, as opposed to the old Tracyee Lynn in my male life. But that will never change the person I was, or the love for my family.
Thanks Traci Lynn
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- February 26, 2020 at 12:52 am #280524Stacey RopkeRegistered On: February 24, 2020Topics: 0Replies: 14Has thanked: 4 timesBeen thanked: 81 times
I’m a veteran served 8 years active duty, six of those were spent at sea as a mechanic. I can get greasy, love the smell of oil, diesel and salt air. I can take an old motor apart, put it back together and make it purr like it just came off the assembly line. I love to get dirty, but more over I love to feel pretty and be feminine.
- February 23, 2020 at 10:26 am #279896Leann ManningLadyRegistered On: December 6, 2019Topics: 0Replies: 6Has thanked: 27 timesBeen thanked: 36 times
I am man with a feminine side that is desperately seeking to get out. In the last few years I have found myself dressing more and more and have started to look for like minded individuals to discuss things with. I am very happy to have found this site and just being able to share my thoughts and feelings has been so helpful.
In the last few months I have made the desition to start making some changes in my life to help express my feminine side. So, Bye bye body hair and I’m letting the hair on top of my head grow out. Going for an androgynous look. I am not interested in transitioning and I don’t like make up so going out in full femme will not happen for me. However, I am looking for and finding some things (clothes) I think I could wear to help Leann express herself. Then I just need the courage to come out and start wearing the stuff in public.
Like many others here, I am in a “macho” profession. Maintenance tech, mechanic, builder, fabricator…. Jack of all trades. Hobbies include motocross, model trains, gardening and crafts. I have a very artsy side and of course I absolutely love women’s clothing and i am a complete shoe whore. it’s a good thing I have large, wide feet and can’t fit in most women’s shoes. Otherwise I would have a house full of cute strapy heels and ankle boots. Which would have me completely broke…lol 🤣🤣🤣
- February 23, 2020 at 9:15 am #279867Alice BlackDuchessRegistered On: January 18, 2020Topics: 11Replies: 248Has thanked: 450 timesBeen thanked: 741 times
I am retired computer programmer who worked that field for over 35 years. I have been married for 12 years and actually knew her for 8 years before that. She does not know my crossdressing secret.
I just retired in January and am looking for things to do. Joined CDH in part as gives me something to do.
- February 23, 2020 at 9:03 am #279857Stephanie BassHostessRegistered On: November 30, 2019Topics: 27Replies: 4211Has thanked: 60384 timesBeen thanked: 15031 times
Hi to every one im a husband father of 6 adult kids and 6 grand children . Had numerous jobs thru out my life married for 35 years to a wonderful loving wife she met Stephanie about 1 year after marrage and has tolerated her not fully approves of her but lets her visit lots more now that kids are grown up on there own and like some others she says she is lots easyer to get along with (lol) she buys me items like clothes makeup heels wigs and some times helps her come over for visits I am a loving husband and a crossdresser really not looking to transition just like to be a pretty woman as often as I can thanks stephanie
- February 5, 2020 at 3:04 pm #273477Robin SnowDuchessRegistered On: May 7, 2019Topics: 22Replies: 272Has thanked: 2409 timesBeen thanked: 1317 times
This is such a wonderful thread. I spent the better part of my professional career doing application development when that left me in 2008 I changed careers and went into education. I taught HS math for a couple of years. Then one day my wonderful wife and I decided that we were done. We sold the house in Connecticut and bought a little place in Vermont. I currently manage a ski program at a local resort and run a small craft business making wooden bowls and other gift items.
Living the dream!
- February 4, 2020 at 7:14 am #273171Cassie JaysonDuchessRegistered On: September 29, 2019Topics: 69Replies: 1095Has thanked: 2604 timesBeen thanked: 5144 times
HI everyone I am 65 and the father of 3 adult kids and grandfather of 2. I have been a letter carrier for 26 years and as long as my body holds up I am looking for another 5.
- February 3, 2020 at 5:29 pm #272984DeLoraLadyRegistered On: October 15, 2019Topics: 63Replies: 287Has thanked: 930 timesBeen thanked: 1648 times
I am a husband and a father, farmer so (Biologist, botanist, animal psychologist, mechanic, meteorologist…) Professionally, I am an exploration geologist and mentor to new geologists. I am training as a RPAS (drone) pilot.
I am also very interested in sustainable forestry techniques, particularly coppicing and hedge laying.
In short I am a jack of all trades and master of none!
With all this on the go I don’t know where I find the time to dress, but I do, and I try to work it into what I do where possible. Today for example, I was grouting a bathroom while wearing a bra and cami with full makeup on.
- February 3, 2020 at 2:44 pm #272959
- February 2, 2020 at 12:59 pm #272622AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
Hi. Another good question.
I am ex-military, an infantry soldier for 13 years, and now I am a designer, maker and seller of metal bird ornaments. I am also a singer, specialising in folk ballads.
I am a father of a grown up daughter, a son, a brother, a cardiac emergency survivor and an all-around good egg. A friend to a few, an acquaintance to more and recognised by yet more.
I hope that answers your question.
- February 2, 2020 at 11:31 am #272605DeeAnn HopingsDuchessRegistered On: November 10, 2019Topics: 11Replies: 950Has thanked: 9 timesBeen thanked: 2656 times
Perhaps the most important thing that this site does is to let people know that they are not alone, that they are not the first and won’t be the last. MANY, closeted or not, live in isolation and cannot connect with their Tribe. Isolation is a terrible thing and we must continually work to break that down.
I am a 71 now. My progression over the last 3 decades was gay to bisexual to crossdresser to non-binary transgender. I present as female 80% to 90% of the time and am comfortable in doing so. My weaknesses are clothes made of silk and short skirts, short skorts and short shorts. Since I retired and relocated to the SoCal desert, the vast majority of people that I’ve met only know DeeAnn. Few have met Don. My persona is an amalgam of male and female. I have no plans to transition as I do not have dysphoria to any significant degree. Sexually, I identify more as lesbian than anything else these days.
I am with my 2nd wife. I have 2 grown children from my first marriage and 2 grandchildren. I’m a retired mechanical engineer, a motorsports fan since the mid-50’s, movie buff and a computer and photography enthusiast. Musically, my tastes are all over the place. Artists on my iPhone/iPad include Sade, Glenn Gould, Scott Joplin, TuPac, Alicia de Larrocha, Judy Collins, The Heavy, Rihanna, Adele, Hilary Hahn, Mark Ronson, Sergio Mendes and a number of others. As Harry Reasoner once said: “If there is a pattern, I fail to discern it.”. I was a board member and treasurer for our local trans organization for 2+ years and a steering committee member for our local HRC group for 2+ years. I am currently the volunteer coordinator for the Palm Springs Pride organization and a member of The Women’s Circle. Presently considering joining OLOC (Old Lesbians Organizing for Change). One bedroom of our house is DeeAnn’s Den and serves as clothing and shoe storage and dressing and makeup space.
I like being Me!
- November 2, 2019 at 6:41 pm #243173Paula FDuchessRegistered On: August 7, 2019Topics: 17Replies: 1552Has thanked: 30616 timesBeen thanked: 6412 times
Five nights a week, I am involved in hospital security. It’s not just writing parking tickets in the parking areas or making sure all the doors are locked at night. We sort of define or duty as protecting hospital asset’s. Those assets are not just the physical property, but also include the staff, patients and visitor’s in our facility. Some times, that involves showing compassion to people we do not know that have just received some bad news, or joking and talking with children who are really pretty scared by the things they see and have heard about hospitals. Most kids like for me to stop in and check on them and maybe show them the one card trick I know, and I always give them the number to the phone I carry with me at all times.
I also like amateur photography. That is taking pictured of people and thigs other than me, I am actually pretty camera shy when I know someone is taking my picture. I play guitar well enough to enjoy it for me, no requests please, LOL.
My favorite computer game is ‘Sims4’. With the newest version of the game, we can finally have gay and crossdressing Sim’s in the game, you can even give the cross dressed males a swishy feminine walk.
- October 31, 2019 at 2:48 pm #242569Ruby SmithLadyRegistered On: October 17, 2019Topics: 8Replies: 303Has thanked: 427 timesBeen thanked: 574 times
I’m a construction worker M-F during the day, then I’m a mix between m&f at nights and on the weekend. I myself, feel that I’m bigender. I would like to do some transition but keep my downstairs 😊. I doubt I will ever get to do it, but I can dream. I do at least have a supportive wife, but our son does not know, at least we don’t think he knows. Like others, I want to say thanks for creating this wonderful site.
- October 31, 2019 at 12:50 pm #242512Peggy Sue WilliamsDuchess - AnnualRegistered On: June 26, 2019Topics: 23Replies: 432Has thanked: 1611 timesBeen thanked: 2116 times
This is a very interesting topic. I have seen a few surveys, which pose this very question, and there is a definite pattern, not absolute, but there is an identifiable pattern.
Our director of outreach in my support group actually keeps statistics of not only our members but also CDs who have contacted her and shown an interest in our group.
The pattern seems to indicate people in macho-type professions and detail oriented professions gravitate toward cross dressing.
Stock brokers, accountants, engineers, law enforcement officers, electricians, mechanics, career military, computer programmers, college professors, gun smiths, carpenters, fire fighters, and many others gravitate toward cross dressing.
Is this pattern conclusive proof, probably not, nevertheless, it is interesting to see what we all are, when the pretty clothes and make up come off.
Oh, me? Retired military, followed by a civilian career as an electronics engineer.
- October 31, 2019 at 10:35 am #242474Danielle SilverfeatherLadyRegistered On: July 29, 2019Topics: 9Replies: 59Has thanked: 47 timesBeen thanked: 359 times
- October 8, 2019 at 9:05 pm #233026AngelaLadyRegistered On: August 27, 2019Topics: 9Replies: 119Has thanked: 240 timesBeen thanked: 376 times
I’m a father and husband to a wonderful family. O am also an infrastructure manager that wishes he were a chef. Most of all a crossdresser who is in the closet and doesn’t want to hurt his family with a long held secret. And to top it all a person who is unsure whether further transition is in her future.
- October 7, 2019 at 12:45 am #232101Stacey RenauldLadyRegistered On: September 20, 2019Topics: 5Replies: 70Has thanked: 70 timesBeen thanked: 157 times
I’m a husband, partner and friend. I’d love to think that I could still be one of those if I ever did decide to transition.
I’m an academic who holds multiple degrees. I’m an educator and also a student (currently working on PGCE number 3).
I’m a lover of film, theatre, travelling and MotoGP (Congratulations to Marky Mark Marquez. World Champion 2019).
- October 6, 2019 at 11:01 pm #232064Amanda DuboisLadyRegistered On: July 17, 2019Topics: 1Replies: 32Has thanked: 69 timesBeen thanked: 97 times
I like most people have many labels, to the outside world I am male, Welsh, a gay man, a husband. Each Identity is part of the whole. Amanda is just one fabulous part. I feel we are blessed as individuals. We get to experience the whole range of human experience. I’m just as happy as a stubble face man in a shirt and tie as I am in skirt, heels and make-up. We all have elements of masculinity and femininity in us all. We have the gift of being able to recognise this, embrace it and act on these elements to be our full and true selves.
- August 4, 2019 at 10:31 am #204112Michelle StephensRegistered On: May 11, 2019Topics: 0Replies: 7Has thanked: 4 timesBeen thanked: 31 times
Thank you Vanessa for saying what we all at times feel. I am a factory worker who performs his duties each day Monday through Friday. Then comes the weekend and Michelle gets to go out with friends and enjoy the activities in the surrounding communities! I am comfortable with my duality and have been. Michelle brings out the best in me and my friends can see this. All those lost years of suppressing because of society”norms”! I am now out as much as I can be and look forward to all that I can accomplish as Michelle. You are a strong person and I applaud you for moving forward to be the true you and for developing this website. We all love you and cherish you!
- July 27, 2019 at 12:41 pm #201502Bobbie1951LadyRegistered On: June 22, 2019Topics: 13Replies: 276Has thanked: 1048 timesBeen thanked: 517 times
Who am I when i am not Bobbie?
i am a retired/disabled physician still mourning the loss of much more than just a career rather a life calling.
i am a father of two both adults neither with any knowledge of Bobbie or that Dad likes to dress up like Mom.
i am an aspiring author and poet who lacks the dedication most days
i am a hiker working and training to thru hike first the Florida Trail the the Appalachian Trail (not very feminine that)
i am disabled first by a neuromuscular disorder that crippled my hands and weakened my legs, then by the loss of my right leg below the knee.
i am all of this and more. Like all people i am a complex mix of aspects and habits, of knowledge and faith sometimes contradictory and yet fused together in one
- July 15, 2019 at 4:24 pm #198241AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
i am really a split person, one a faithful husband and father, who has lovely and somewhat tolerant wife(who has known about Giselle for 8+ years), who has put up a front and gone through the motions for the past 37 years.
the other is a woman with a man’s body, who will have to live with my situation for the rest of my life
i so respect those sisters who have the courage i lack and really have never had to be who they are and accept all the consequences both good and bad
- July 14, 2019 at 1:55 pm #197854Rachel PlainLadyRegistered On: July 4, 2016Topics: 3Replies: 248Has thanked: 84 timesBeen thanked: 661 times
So who am I? I’m a father to two (now adult) children and of course, a husband of 26 years to a bemused wife. I’m a British ex-pat now living permanently in Australia, where I have dual nationality. I am into miniature wargaming – most eras of history, sci-fi and fantasy – and also boardgames and role-playing games. Also photography and, at the moment, learning and performing burlesque. We like to go camping when we can, and I’m a massive Sherlock Holmes nerd. Oh, and I work in IT.
- July 14, 2019 at 10:40 am #197812JackieAmbassadorRegistered On: February 18, 2016Topics: 28Replies: 190Has thanked: 340 timesBeen thanked: 806 times
I’m Jackie Wild, I’m not transgender, transexual or shemale. Other than wearing the labels drag queen and or a cross dresser I really don’t have another clue as for what I am. I live 24/7 as a gay person that wears makeup daily, don’t own one stitch of male clothing. However I do have over 40 wigs, a closet and dressers full of what is deemed “womens clothing”, and I have my nails done every two weeks. I could go on but I believe I’ve half way answered the question. Speaking of question; what am I to be called?
- July 14, 2019 at 10:01 am #197796Kelli GorgeousRegistered On: April 19, 2019Topics: 0Replies: 1Has thanked: 3 timesBeen thanked: 13 times
My identity shouldn’t be a “word”. My identity is who I am. What does it matter what color, what religion, what sexual orientation, and what my opinions are? Like what was said from the beginning, we are all human beings. So why not let everyone live in peace and happiness with themselves? Do I hate? I do not, to each their own as long as they are happy with their lives. We need to remember our time in this world is a clicking clock with an alarm going off at any given minute. There is no time to waste on hatred and prejudice. It is very easy, just let people be themselves. Violence and harsh words do nothing but make a situation worse. Do I argue against other’s views? I do not, just wish people would, as a whole, not judge others for their personal perspective in life. What is the reason to hate or disagree with a persons actions or appearance if it doesn’t affect you? I really hope our world makes a change for the good. It has begun but so much work is still needed. I will be long gone by the time things change for the better but I hope and trust that it will. My identity is always going to be a human being. Lucky enough to live in the USA and be myself. Everyone else out there please don’t give up! When you give up, you lose. You have to keep fighting and trying to win. Be happy and content with whom you are, the alarm could go off at any minute.
- July 25, 2019 at 5:57 pm #201129
- July 7, 2019 at 3:09 pm #195905AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
- July 7, 2019 at 10:28 am #195853Nicole BoxLadyRegistered On: May 26, 2019Topics: 8Replies: 147Has thanked: 163 timesBeen thanked: 369 times
- July 7, 2019 at 10:02 am #195846Amy MyersBaronessRegistered On: February 11, 2019Topics: 23Replies: 1660Has thanked: 5042 timesBeen thanked: 5492 times
To use the labels, which are important at times, though there is no doubt I am a crossdresser, I do not believe that I would ever become transgendered. I love being a man, and have a definate male persona, but in the last year, Amy, has certainly gelled into a person who deserves recognition, and needs some time for herself.
For many years, I was completely closeted, and only dressed up a few times a year, then that wasn’t enough, and Amy rather “came to be” late last year, and I think of her birthday as Jan 1 2019. About a year ago, I was still just my male self dressing up, but then “she” needed more.
Now I’m making cautious steps into the big wide world as my femme self. Scary, but somehow necessary to me, and unbelievably satisfying. All has gone well, so far, but I could not of done it so quickly without the support of a local group of CDer’s who I got to know about through one of the Ambassadors here.
Sadly, so much of the information out there about crossdressing is so fetish oriented that the impression many can get is not the right one. Also, there seems to be a perception that most are gay, and that’s not true either, but of course some are. There is much education of the general population that needs to be done, I sometimes think that we, the CD community might be where gay and lesbians were several decades ago. At least here in most areas of North America, and some places in Europe as well where is there is wide acceptance of alternative lifestyles.
- June 2, 2019 at 7:18 pm #182403Elise MichelleRegistered On: January 3, 2018Topics: 25Replies: 354Has thanked: 482 timesBeen thanked: 1394 times
As a single parent I am both father and mother to my children. I am a doting son to my wonderful mother who lives across the street from me. I am a brother to my three siblings. And I am a teacher, mentor, coach and surrogate father to the approximately 150 students I teach every year. I used to make a lot of money as a New York lawyer, but now i make something far more important. I make children think and grow in ways even they never thought possible. And nothing is more rewarding than that.
- July 15, 2019 at 3:37 pm #198219
- June 2, 2019 at 4:05 pm #182381AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
I am married to a wonderful wife, two beautiful daughters and three exceptionally good looking and intelligent grandchildren. (I MAY be a little prejudiced…lol!)
I’m a senior manager for a large commercial construction company and the owner of a small residential service company. I hope soon to retire from the commercial company and devote my energy to building my company to a more profitable (retirement income) venture. I giggle when I think that some day I may be able to get a “woman-owned business” classification!
Most of my life, I identified as a crossdresser, but I’ve recently acknowledged to myself that I’m truly a transgender woman. It’s exciting and scary…but I love my life!
- June 2, 2019 at 11:20 am #182377AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
I’m going to answer as I read the question:
I am a human being, somewhere on a sliding gender scale, created by humans.
I like to wear certain items of clothing, made by humans for humans.
Some women like to wear these items too, but many do not. They have a choice.
I also make my own choices. I believe in the message central to many films, songs and TV series (No pun intended), to be yourself and believe in yourself no matter what.
This is very difficult, as, although what I believe in is in no way illegal, it seems to upset some people (Some people are upset by all sorts of things, such as the price of bread, whether Brexit is good or bad and so on), and so I am forced to keep my choice of clothing secret in most situations.
The inherent ridiculousness of this situation is not lost on me, but I strive to find out what it is that upsets others so much.
And so far, no-one has come up with a good answer.
So I am a person marginalised and trapped for no reason whatsoever.
This will not do.
As Freddie Mercury said, I Want to Break Free…
- June 2, 2019 at 9:16 am #182352DevraLadyRegistered On: March 11, 2019Topics: 1Replies: 6Has thanked: 14 timesBeen thanked: 20 times
I’m not sure I’m understanding the question but here’s my reply..I’m David…Devra when I’m dressed up as a beautiful woman. I’ve just recently started coming out more with my love for feeling beautiful and enjoying my feminine side. I even feel better just writing this reply. Myself I just love to dress in my women’s clothing whenever I want to. I’m still looking for a woman who accepts me as I am and I’m not into men. This gets mistaken quite often. I first put on pantyhose when I was 9 years old and as hard as I’ve tried I can’t give it up. I love how I look and feel dressed up as a woman. I threw everything away in 2001…clothing..wigs..heels..pictures..lingerie and i regret it to this day. I still get scared going out in public but it’s getting better with the help of some girlfriend’s. .some family I’ve shared with and a support group I have through the VA. I can’t put into word’s the freedom I feel when I’m out and about in public and surprisingly the support I hear from some. I’m 60 now but I still carry myself pretty well and my legs can sometimes make my girlfriends jealous. Thank you all on this site and especially you Vannesa.
- May 19, 2019 at 6:51 am #178727AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
I have been married for 34 years to a loving wife. She has known about my dressing for 30 of those years and is fairly supportive. I am closeted otherwise. I have two grown kids who are contributing to society, and I work in the family business. I am considered a leader in my community. I am not transgender, but label myself as a crossdresser. (I hate labels, but, oh well). I enjoy dressing, then returning to my natural self.
Somewhere in my 40’s, I was able to accept myself and realized this is who I am, and am not going change. I do not consider myself trapped in the wrong body, I am quite happy the way I am, but am empathic to those that feel they are. I had the typical things a crossdresser goes through happen in my life, married thinking it would go away, purging, etc. That was the most difficult thing in my life to come to grips with, but when I did, what a peaceful place. I have enjoyed female clothing for as long as I can remember.
As others have mentioned, it is regrettable that when information is sought, there is so much smut out there to sort through, and that does not help anything. This will be, and has been, one of the biggest challenges going forward, that our community faces. Stereotypes are difficult to break, when the lowest denominator shows up when people are searching for information. The negative image will continue, mostly because the community is mostly closeted and no personal interaction takes place, so others do not see first hand that it is just not a group of pervs and weirdos. Television does not help either, while very progressive in many ways, crossdressing is still portrayed as deviant behavior, for the most part, with few exceptions. One of the few positives I can think of, was the Drew Carey Show. Finding sites like this takes a bit of doing, but is very satisfying when you do.
- July 15, 2019 at 3:08 pm #198201
- May 7, 2019 at 9:40 pm #175231Davina EvansLadyRegistered On: March 23, 2019Topics: 1Replies: 102Has thanked: 50 timesBeen thanked: 321 times
I am a husband to a wonderful wife, father to 2 daughters, retired from a profession that served my well.
Spend time around the house, plus too much time birding.
Just love the feel of dressing in feminine clothes, that’s all no desire to undergo further changes.
At present what I am is happy and very content.
- May 7, 2019 at 2:14 pm #175163Olivia LivinLadyRegistered On: October 22, 2018Topics: 56Replies: 1676Has thanked: 9701 timesBeen thanked: 4820 times
I’m an involved loving parent of three and a grandparent of five as well as a caring and supportive partner to my lovely SO. I’m involved with community volunteer groups and continue to enjoy my daily work as a renovations contractor. I’m known by most for my sarcastic wit, casual easy smile, and outspokeness with regards to waste, greed and excess. I endeavour to learn and grow every day
- May 6, 2019 at 4:57 pm #174907AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
- May 6, 2019 at 10:05 am #174809
- May 5, 2019 at 5:08 pm #174622Stef SmithDuchessRegistered On: April 24, 2017Topics: 1Replies: 78Has thanked: 4 timesBeen thanked: 174 times
- September 4, 2018 at 5:36 pm #114934Sassy SouthLadyRegistered On: September 4, 2018Topics: 2Replies: 4Has thanked: 2 timesBeen thanked: 13 times
Well let’s see… When I am not Sassy which has been a while since she has been able to get out. I’m a 41 year old guy who has been through a lot of ups and downs in his life. I can say that I have not been myself lately. I’ve been in a I guess you could say a dark place in my life and started gambling which has been my lastest bad habit. After wasting way to much money and realizing that I am not lucky. I have been trying to get a grip on my gambling addiction. (It’s a horrible addiction, worse that any addiction I’ve ever experienced). I realized what I am doing is running from myself and the things I truly enjoy. I use to enjoy being a DJ and producing electronic dance music. I ran into some legal problems last year and while I was incarcerated from March 2017 till April 2018 my equipment I used to make music and DJ with was stolen along with Sassy’s clothing and accessories. There was so much more taken but it’s not important to this story. So when I was released I didn’t have any of those things that I enjoyed. Instead of taking what money I had and purchasing new stuff to make music or to become Sassy I got the bright idea I could try my luck and take my winnings to replace the stuff. Well let’s say that it was a bad decision and since April this year I’ve been through thousands of dollars with nothing to show for it. So I decided about a month ago and I would stop gambling and put my focus on the things I truly enjoy which is music and being Sassy. I haven’t been able to start purchasing anything at this time. But I can say that just window shopping for new outfits, wigs along with watching and reading about dressing up has been great for my depression. I’m feeling better and more positive about life again. I so can’t wait to go shopping for wigs, heels, make up and clothes soon. Once I get Sassy back together I will start working on the music equipment. I’m so ready to be beautiful again. Until that time I’m just a guy who is dealing with his addictions. Having a good support system is key which is why I decided to find others who share a common interest. So any positive advice is welcome. Thanks for reading 😉
- September 4, 2018 at 7:31 am #114884Ellen ThePrettyOneLadyRegistered On: July 23, 2018Topics: 1Replies: 38Has thanked: 11 timesBeen thanked: 62 times
At the heart of it, I love to create. I have a strong need for external praise on my accomplishments, probably as I did not get many growing up. I like fairness and order. I like wit and puzzles, which challenge my mind.
Using labels, I am a physician, computer programmer, father, husband, furniture builder, gardener, make preserves and breads, photographer, handyman, and I create a fantastic illusion of a woman. Since my wife cannot tolerate giving me praise for this creation and has not wanted me to go out in public, I have to share it in the online communities.
- August 28, 2018 at 11:18 pm #113955Courtney SmilesLadyRegistered On: July 31, 2018Topics: 1Replies: 41Has thanked: 64 timesBeen thanked: 91 times
Who am I? I love the uniqueness of the titles and labels that many ladies have offered. I am many of those but I am discovering that I am much more because of the woman who lives inside. I like to think of it as living a gender-blended life. Being able to fill the needs of my family and friends and fulfilling my needs by dressing and presenting myself as the women inside.
- August 19, 2018 at 7:03 pm #112630AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
I am in IT and self taught at the beginning. However I have been and done many jobs in my life. The second longest job was as a weapons loader in the USAF for 9 1/2 years. I was a copier and fax repair technician for 5 years then self taught IT taking my first two Microsoft certifications on my own then moved to the IT side from the copier side. Now I work in IS at a hospital and love the job. My most important position in life is to love my wife as much as I can and be there for her since she is there for me and my feminine self. TTFN💋👠
- August 19, 2018 at 6:05 pm #112611Bettie HoustonLadyRegistered On: May 25, 2018Topics: 2Replies: 68Has thanked: 119 timesBeen thanked: 177 times
Honestly, I do not know the answer to question. It is a question I have trying to answer now for several years.
I understand the various roles I have within the family; son, brother, husband, father, protector and provider. My roles professionally and within the community but I still feel that I am searching for my true identity.
- April 10, 2018 at 11:10 am #95351JessicaLadyRegistered On: August 12, 2016Topics: 40Replies: 173Has thanked: 393 timesBeen thanked: 405 times
I’m a musician, writer, lover of life, husband, eldest brother. Labels for me have been many and I’m trying to just accept who I am. All of me. This is tough sometimes still getting a little shame, but this is my journey. I am a stained glass window with multiple colors, shades, shapes, and designs. I love them all.
- April 8, 2018 at 5:46 pm #95109Edie MajeskiBaronessRegistered On: April 7, 2018Topics: 19Replies: 209Has thanked: 27 timesBeen thanked: 588 times
- April 1, 2018 at 12:04 pm #94193Stephanie YellLadyRegistered On: March 27, 2018Topics: 0Replies: 4Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 8 times
I do not separate my life into dual areas, I am just me whether I am grocery shopping, working in the garden or changing the oil in the car. I am a industrial electrician by trade, working on cell phone towers, oil refineries and projects along that line. I enjoy the physical and mental challenge from my work. But I just live one life, being who I am.