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Hi ladies,
Like many of us, the older I have become, the more my collection of “all things femme” has grown, (in my case to a complete femme wardrobe**) and of course the closer I get to, (one day in the dim future I sincerely hope…), that “big makeover in the sky”.
I’m old enough and worked hard enough for most of the above to be high end. EG Lingerie. many bras and panty sets are Simone Perele or Wacoal, some of the sleepwear is pure silk and the daily outer wear mostly by http://www.fellhamilton.com.au
Any perusal of my (later) public photos on this site will readily see where I’m coming from.
This got me thinking about where all of Caty’s things will end up and I thought it would be most appropriate if, instead of a charity shop or perhaps even the bin, it would be much nicer if as much of it as possible, ended up with a deserving CD or Transwoman.
So I contacted our local “Pride Centre” and they have recommended two organizations as follows.
https://pridecentre.org.au/resources/be-who-you-are/
Another obvious destination is the local CD group, but efforts to donate “items” there in the past, have been to no avail. Others in other parts of the world may, (hopefully) be different.
Now I dont plan on making it a formal bequest in my will. I’m just going to leave notes in various places, eg my lingerie drawers here at home and the dress rack in my storage unit. With the message that I would appreciate those I’ve left behind, abiding by the instructions contained in the note.
What do other plan do in this regard??.
Gotta be similar organisations to the above in most parts of the world.
Happy (long term!!??) dressing
Caty.
** Disclaimer… I dont wear women’s pants, dresses and skirts for me thank you very much.
Also rather unsure about where my “Lady Catherine” and “Scarlett O Caty” gowns will end up. Cant see any one wearing those “to the office” (LOL)
I’m also unsure where my 3 sets of upscale breast forms and good wigs will end up. Sadly I expect the former will be binned and the latter, (if they are lucky) at a charity shop.
I’ve often thought about that myself.
I have a huge collection of vintage lingerie. I know a lot of my gowns are worth a lot of money. I’ve seen gowns like some of mine sell on eBay for upwards of $200. I have estimated my collection to be worth in excess of $20,000 if someone were to take the time to sell it on eBay.
I know my wife has no interest in any of my lingerie and I don’t think she would take the time to try to sell any of it.
Most of my collection consists of vintage lingerie from the 60’s and 70’s and is very feminine. Most of my nighties and gowns are layered with a top layer of chiffon and have matching chiffon bed jackets. A lot of these are very girly looking and I don’t think any woman today would wear them.
I also have many full and half slips with wide lace hems and very lacy bodices. I just hate the thought of these pretty slips going in the trash.
My pantie and bra collection although cherished by me I’m sure has little resale value.
I think the only part of my collection that would make it to the resale shop is my dresses. Many of which were dresses my wife outgrew when she gained weight and I’ve always stayed thin and petite.
I have tried to thin out my collection in the past by offering items to the crossdressing community but it seems everyone is looking for things that are 2x or 3x and most things in my collection are size small or medium to large. These sizes are vintage sizes and therefore even smaller in today’s sizing.
I’m sure my wigs and breast forms would go directly in the trash.
I can only hope before life is over I can bring myself to find a good home for all my pretty things
Caty as much as I have thought of my clothing and shoes my biggest concern is my jewelry. Most of my jewelry is real diamonds and gold or silver and I have tried to convey to my beloved wifey that there be gold in them thar bags. I hope she takes the time to look and not just be rid of “The other woman.” Many of my dresses are name brand as are my shoes, but alas, when someone is gone many times so are their clothes.
🍷CHi Caty,
In another slightly similar thread to do with dying, I mentioned that I’d left a letter in the same place as my will for my two daughters who as yet aren’t aware of my CD nature. The emphasis was to do with what it was all about, and hopefully reassure them that it was my ‘secret’ and not to feel bad that they’d somehow missed a chance to meet Marti. Which, knowing them, bless, they quite likely would.
It didn’t occur to me to direct them what to actually do with the wardrobe I’d leave, but I’m fairly sure they would be sensible enough to donate anything to local charity shops – none of my clothing stuff has financial value.
Otherwise I’ve adopted your note strategy with anything of value. “Don’t throw this out it’s a real gold sovereign”, and “Don’t forget these wedding rings are platinum, not silver”, and my favourite: “These are the (my wife’s) family pearls that got stolen in a burglary and we got 2 grand for on the insurance” (my wife by the way was as honest as could be, she thought they’d gone. I only re-found them when she died, and no, I didn’t set the record straight)
Edit : just kidding on the last bit, of course;-)
Marti xxx
Hi Caty both my daughters know about my dressing, my eldest is more acceptable that the younger one.
It’s been settled they will treat them as you would normally.
Recycling, charity shops or as my youngest pointed out probably a bonfire dad. (well that’s honesty i did ask)
Lol Amanda xx
Caty….
If my brother survives the shock
….I expect it will all go in the bin……. along with me!!!!
Grace x
The passing of my wife has compelled me to consider this topic. I have nice clothes, and my elder daughter is my size; but she does not approve of Lulu, so I expect the clothes to follow my wife’s to our church’s two charity projects.
Except for my size 13W gunboats, which will will probably go to Goodwill. My daughters will divide the jewelry, most of which was their mom’s, anyway.Lulu
Hi Caty, a very timely question!!!
I’m in the middle of writing up my estate plan and “who gets what” list and I hadn’t thought about my CD wardrobe. Hopefully I don’t get hit by a bus and have a bit of notice of my impending departure. I’d probably throw out some of the poor quality stuff myself (though I’ve gotten rid of most of the junky femme clothes already). My wife wants to keep my CD activity secret from our kids so if I don’t spell it out in instructions to her, she will toss it all in the bin. So this is a great reminder to add a section in my estate plan about my CD wardrobe. Living in NW Canada, there isn’t a local CD group (wish there was). I’m guessing I will donate the majority of items to our local not-for-profit thrift and donation centre operated by an Association for individuals with intellectual and developmental disabilities (that make up most of the centre’s employees – it’s really a good thing). Fingers crossed, I hope I have at least another 20 years of use. Hugs, Krista.
” Scarlett’s home for orphaned dresses” is always a worthwhile cause………….so I have heard 😂
Oh goody Grace I’ll send you my pink one, now that’s really made your Sunday night, 😬
Oh honey….are you sure you can bear to part with it….you are so kind…xxx
..( damn, damn, damn )
Oh Grace I am welling up as i fold it now, I feel so bad I didn’t give it a chance, but I know you’ll treasure it and grow to love it, and it will finally be hung in a wardrobe to bloom once again. I hope you didn’t break a nail when you swore at the end, I know it can be so annoying.
Lol Amanda xx
I will be up early every day……waiting for the postman…
I can’t afford 1st class delivery sweetie, so you can lay in for 3 morning and
Amanda xx
No one. I’m taking it all with me, just in case the Ancient Egyptians were right all along!
👗🔺 Barb :B
Well the Egyptians were robbed so I expect yours will possibly be too Barb.
Now I would love to see the surprised look on their faces at some of your treasures.
Amanda xx
Yes, very true! Oh those raised archeological eyes brows! However, I suspect my descendants will demand repatriation of all my items as the current Egyptians are doing with England. 🔺⚰️
❤️ Barb
Can’t see any of my descendants wanting any of it back Barb, I suspect my youngest daughter was right about a bonfire.
Amanda xx
Norman, Saxon blood here Barb.
Just as well chuck me on the fire, old blubberbubble here would be gone in minutes. DIY funerals could catch on.
I already have a letter for my daughter asking her to take care of everything. Keep anything she may want to keep, and the rest, make a pile to donate to the “dress for success” charity (all/any business like clothes), one pile to take to a women’s shelter (most casual stuff), one pile for anything she thinks she may want to resale on ebay, and one final pile to be taken to the local cd/tg support group. (Wigs, makeup, and whatever else may be left).
No, my daughter doesn’t know (at least officially) about me. But I expect she will honor my wishes.
Gabriela
Bless you Gabriela,
your post so much reflects my own thoughts
Marti xxx
Be nice if say CDH has a donated box or something where everything can go to them in care of Donna’s estate. To give away to other girls that needs them
Donna
Hi Caty,
Well, facing the facts of life, several years ago (to my SO’s surprise), I started reducing my male drab wardrobe. 1 shirt comes in new – 2 go out either tossed or donated. Same with slacks, shoes, everything. I would hope that when I pass, my burden to anyone remaining who might still care about me will be small.
I’m also slowly reducing my femme wardrobe, such that it is. I suppose somebody might find whatever is left – which I don’t expect to be that much, and (sadly) it will be left to them to decide how to deal with it, both physically and emotionally.
I used to work in an occupation where ‘atta boys’ were given out on occasion, but as I was reminded often enough, it just took one ‘aw s..t’ to wipe out about 1000 of the compliments. Let’s just say I left before the 1980/1 strike. I suppose no matter how exemplary I might lead my male drab life, just one undergarment or one stocking might wipe out all that, too.
And if that turns out to be the case, well, I just wish them well as they and others around them face up to their own hidden desires. As I’m discovering as I age, there are an awful lot more people with parts of their lives they pray others never find out. We are all just human after all, aren’t we.
-
If I go before the wife then I’m sure all Michelles things will go to the dump. If I go after the wife then my step son will have confirmation that his step father was a perverted freak. I won’t care either way.
My wife and I like to joke about what the kids will find when they clean out our stuff. All my.. Bridgette’s clothes, forms, shapewear, etc. Then there’s all our…toys, ahem…
They’ll be scarred for ever after, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaa!!!! (Mad villain laughter echoing into the night)
Bridgette
Awesome, Bridgette!
My SO and adult children know what I’m up to and I don’t think they give a s*it, My kids have never said anything cheeky cause they know I’ll cut-them-off of any inheritance!
“Oh yeah, Junior!? Got something to say?”
“Ah, no Ma’am, absolutely not!”
💋 Barb :B
Alas, I’m afraid all we are is dust in the wind. Whether it’s a fine collection of beautiful women’s things or a closet full of Armani suits, the only one who really cares about it all is you. So cherish it now while you can, don’t worry about what is to come. It’s only material goods. It is you who makes it all special.
Existentially yours, Clara
Could I just take it with me bury all my things on top. Might need to wear my special dress for formal night up there.
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