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    • #408937

      I just love to dress and I’m scared to let anybody know. I just want to be able to dress and be seen. Like I’m scared that I can’t be open about it cuz it kills me I just love it I just wish I was a female so bad I just feels like me but I can’t just say it everybody you know

       

    • #408966
      Stevie Steiner
      Managing Ambassador

      Hey Desdel, I hear you.  Nothing scarier than the fears we build within ourselves.  But theres nothing worse in life than being forced to live a life that is not yours.  Sometimes it takes a bit of time to gain strength and vanquish those fears but know it can be done!!  You are in the perfect spot for that to happen Desdel.  It starts here hon!  🙂

      Stevie

    • #409015
      Cassie Jayson
      Duchess

      Hi Desdel,  You are in the same boat most of us were at first.  Wanting to go out into the world and show our feminine self and scared to death for not being accepted.  Maybe try little things first, like going out for a walk either very late in the day or very early in the morning.  Latter maybe going to a park for a few minutes ( I did early morning ) before the world gets busy.  Then some people may see you but only at a distance. Just start with small steps and build when you feel a little more comfortable.

      Good luck,   Sandy

    • #409038
      Patty Phose
      Duchess

      I first began dressing in public when I was 17. It was just pantyhose and shorts at first. I was so scared to go out wearing my pantyhose but I had wanted to do it for so long, desire eventually took over. Then I added short girl’s short to my wardrobe. Wearing them out with my pantyhose became a must do but I chickened out a lot before my desire overwhelmed my fear.

      After being out in that attire several times, I thought it would be exciting to buy more pantyhose while wearing that. Fear raced in and stopped me so many times. Then desire eventually raced in. I went to a store, went in, picked out several pairs of pantyhose and went to the register to pay. There was people in front of and behind me. Here I was wearing pantyhose and buying pantyhose. I was very nervous but stayed on the line, paid and left. It was incredibly exciting and such a thrill and rush. Of course I had to do it more.

      Then I decided I had to have some platform wedges I had fallen in love with. I had thought of buying them many times but never did. That kept me thinking about them constantly. I would go to the store and look at them often. I so wanted them.

      Then I thought it would be so exciting to buy them while I was wearing my pantyhose and short shorts. Try on a pair, walk around a little in them, then pay for them and leave. But fear reared it’s head again. I had walked up to the store entrance so many times, saw people inside, turned and left. Then one day I decided to go just as the store was opening. Go in, get the shoes, try them on and get out fast before people became coming in. That was the plan, but fear had other plans. A lot of chickening out.

      Then one morning I walked up to the store and went in. I quickly went to the shoes. I took a pair of the shelf  and tried to put them on. They didn’t even go on. Too small. Oh no! I wanted to be on my way out of the store by now. I tried on the next size. Too tight. I was thinking I should just leave. I really didn’t want to, but people were beginning to come into the store. I thought some were walking past my aisle and looking at me. Others seemed to be walking up and down the aisle past me, seemingly checking me out. I decided, one last pair in the next larger size. Then I’m leaving regardless of whether they fit or not. That next larger size fit perfect. But there was 5 more pairs in y size. Which ones should I get. I’ll try on another pair. Maybe I should walk around in them a bit and see how they look in the mirrors. I began feeling extreme excitement over the shoes. With all the people wandering about the store and some seemingly checking  me out and what I was doing,  I should have been more nervous but the excitement was keeping it at bay. If they want to see what I’m doing, I’ll show them.

      I walked over to the mirrors and began turning and doing little poses checking out the shoes and loving how they made my legs look. I tried on all  pairs in my size and walked about the store and posed in every one of them. I got some yes nods and thumbs up. After a few hours  I decided to buy all 6 pairs. I even wore a pair out of the store. What had begun as so scary became such and exciting experience.

      Now I had the pantyhose, shorts and shoes I had wanted so much. Now I had to build up the nerve to wear them out. There is always fear, then desire comes in and overwhelms the fear. That’s when I make my move. Next comes excitement mixing in. if the excitement doesn’t come fast enough or strong enough, that’s when I chicken out.

      I know the desire, I know the fear and I know the excitement very well. Getting to the excitement and feeling the thrill and rush is what keeps me going and loving it. Do a little at a time. Maybe wear panties, pantyhose or bra under other clothes, even male clothes and go out. Then maybe not wear socks with long pants so occasionally a bit of your pantyhose might show. Get some generic, comfortable shoes like flats or small heel and begin wearing those. Maybe wear some long er shorts with socks to show a bit more of you legs in pantyhose. Then take off the socks.  Start wearing shorter shorts. Maybe stuff your bra a little to show some small breasts. Improve and feminize your look a little at a time. You know you want to do it. It’s just a matter of ow much.

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