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Hi Ash, I’ve only ever been out once for a walk around my neighbourhood, i was lucky enough not to meet anyone, mind you it was raining at the time and i was wearing a full length rain coat over my dress, it was so liberating being out of the house en femme, it would be lovely to get out and about in the future,
Hugs Rozalyn X
I would smile and walk away.
The only people that have come up to address me directly are sales clerks and other women. One women came up to me and asked for fashion advice. She was wearing shorts and a tee shirt and I was dressed fashionably. I always talk to everyone at art shows and Renaissance fairs, they’re a very receptive group.
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First off I would look and determine if the stranger was a threat or an admirer. Stun gun = threat…. smile = admirer… then proceed from there. If hes complimentary and respects my space thats great and we can have a conversation with hopefully a happy ending. I’m bi so if he’s cute in a perfect world he would get my number.
Hi Ashley! If I was Out in My favorite outfit, feeling confident, I would stop but keep my distance to see what they wanted, (and if it was someone I Knew!) as long as they were polite and seemed Nice I would then possibly talk more .. I think when I, ( maybe we) are out we actually want to be noticed as the woman we represent.. It might be a bit freaky at first but a Nice conversation would do nothing but Boost My confidence to do more.. I have actually been doing this a lot lately so now after this I’ll prob get caught!!Lol!! Jill💖
I would size up a threat or not…….then play “the part” indicate I cannot speak offer a “number” to text me…………….smile ….. while getting my weapons ready…….such as a bright flashlight to temp. blind and kick or push him off balance …………..get my monkey fist ready to sock him……….get my mace ready…..all the while being a sweet girl …………….looking for an out……………to get some time to run away. Maybe use parked cars as a shield to get some time ………They want an easy catch…….if they have to work at it….I think they will move on………………….karley
I’ve lived in big cities most of my life. Normal people don’t approach strangers without a good reason. It’s just not a thing people do. So when someone approaches me on the street, I treat them as a likely threat. I keep a defensible distance while asking what they want. If they invade my space….well….they’re going down and I’m getting outta there.
Wear flat shoes if you’re out by yourself. Especially at night. Wearing heels puts you at an immediate disadvantage. Save them for the club or when you’re out with a group.
Don’t ever give a stranger any personal info. Criminals can use that info to find you and attack later. That attack might not be physical. Identity theft is very common and rarely prosecuted.
Rainbow shields….
Emily,
I’m with you. I’ve lived in various burbs of a very large city all my life and sad to say I would immediately be on the defensive trying to determine if he is a threat. I would keep some distance between us and, while being polite, I would make it clear that I’m in a hurry to get somewhere or meet someone.
Better safe than very sorry.
Fiona
Just keep walking faster and pretend you didn’t hear. Remember that mom said not to talk to strangers. I have had situations like this happen to me and they have usually gone bad fast if the stranger is a man. I am always scanning my space to see who is getting close or coming in fast, or crossing the street toward me or walking behind me or what car is always alongside me. I almost always have my running shoes or flats on (like Emily wisely said) and keep my heels in my bag until I’m into the venue. I’m also really quick to drop out of my pumps (with no straps) in an instant and pick them up and run or just run and leave them. If I think a situation is getting dicey I put my cell phone onto video and pretend to be making a call while I video the crazy folk at a distance for future reference in case I need it. I also put my hand into my bag and locate the mace. I never walk between parked cars and especially avoid vans and campers. I wait and walk into and out of places with others whenever possible. I’ve been harassed, insulted, bumped, slammed, jacked up and threatened. I assume that most people in an altercation are carrying a gun or at least a knife so you don’t want them close to you. Now for those that might need a caveat here, I’m 5 foot 5 weighing 123 pounds and still work half days as a lumberjack. However, as an Intersex Person who often goes out alone, I can be a lightning rod for crazies. Thanks for this topic Ashley. Stay safe and keep your spider sense up. Marg
If the walk as you said is in my neighborhood, then i would probably have no problem with having a verbal exchange to some degree. However, I’m from the south and live outside a small city. Not much need for going on the attach for someone just saying hi.
In another place i would still be polite as I removed myself from the encounter.
Hi ladies!
There wasn’t an “other” option, so I didn’t put a vote in because there really wasn’t one that reflected how I would respond, which would be that I’m just another woman in the neighborhood out for a walk (which happens all the time here) and I’d say Hello back to him. I live in the south, in a fairly small town where people say Hi and talk to strangers all the time, especially in the neighborhood. But maybe that’s just the south, I don’t really know. Or maybe I’m just lucky. My neighborhood is still fairly new, so people are always meeting someone new when out for a walk, so that’s the context that I put the question in.
I do think that if a man I didn’t know came up to me and said Hi, and then started making general small talk, it would make me feel very good because that means he would have seen me as a woman. And unless he was threatening in any way, I wouldn’t have a problem talking to him. And THAT would definitely make me feel very good, to be seen by a man who takes me for a real woman and that he wants to talk to me! 🙂
Hugs,
Holly
Perhaps you should have titled the poll being hit on by a man as by question four that’s where the poll was heading. So I couldn’t vote in that context.
In my world I am often approached or having to engage and just take things in my stride, courteously reply and often engage in conversation. It is mostly with women and occasionally with men but it is day to day matters in a low risk environment.
If I am unsure of intentions I will keep a safe distance and consider options out of the situation but this is very very rare as I will not put myself in areas alone where I have no confidence or perceive a threat.
I chose “give him Ash’s phone number” because that’s the most fun choice.
Honestly, if I’m out walking around dressed, I have made a choice to accept that somebody MIGHT interact with me. So, if a guy/girl starts talking to me, and they’re being polite, I’ll reciprocate with conversation.
As long as I feel safe and it’s not going in a direction that I’m uncomfortable with, I’ll talk to anyone for a while.
I’m not going to yell “eeek!” and run away from the world if I am the one that stepped out into it in certain attire… Live with your choices girls…
Have fun out there!
XOXO
Rayna
That is a very interesting question as I am always walking early in the morning in the dark. First I would be startled as I did not see him. After coming to my senses, which might not happen with the pink fog in play, I would key in that he said Ms. I would then remember my voice training and take a breath then say as squeaky as possible “yes”? All the time ready to run or hit him. It would take a lot to keep my cool having been startled.
Let’s see if you can guess my pick this time. I’m not the first this time. I really don’t know how I’ve missed this.
I would probably greet him in my normal voice. If he doesn’t throw up and run away, things might go my way!
Gwyn
I use to drive long distance 53’ with a sleeper berth we’re at rest areas you need a 12 hours rest in 40 minutes all dressed up and night time I would ventured walking around my rig always keys and purse 👜 wallet and cell approached several times but just waving them except this time time was day time I had my windows covering the sun nobody was parked on the right I moved the curtains and ready opening right door a man was parked next to me had his pants down and made me look at him he came and talked I don’t know how I felt it but I was a completely dressed woman he new and we went for a ride on his pickup well in 45 minutes short ride he made me he’s woman lady girl what a lady wants on a man. I asked after taking me back how he was able to spot me being dressed he said since I arrived at the rest area he was parked several spots and noticed putting my makeup as I was seated on driver side opening curtains for the sun lite on my face he saw me twice opening door, and when closing left curtains and opening right one he new I was going to get out, that’s my story, the way I was dressed mini dress nylons garter belt with heels was dream for him and for me what a girl wants. In the meantime happy dressing Auroras Livingfem
This has happened to me many times. My selection in the poll is not entirely accurate. I will chat him/her up without the intention of an invitation. This was not one of the options. I enjoy talking to people in general plus, always interested in discovering if the person(s) picks me up as a CD. Thus far, never been able to tell or asked the question.
We met a couple of women in their late 20s, just on chance, at a nice restaurant bar. They bought us a drink and are coming over tomorrow. Interesting women of this age are interested in hanging out with a couple of women much older…well, not THAT MUCH older…..LOL!
Hi Ashley. I consider my myself an easy going and approachable person, so they would receive the usual grin and a ” hi, how are you this evening? ” sort of response. ( I say that to everyone I meet anyway ).
If I did not feel uncomfortable or threatened I would respond to their conversation and chat with them. If they were nice I may even walk with them as we chat ( keeping in public spaces ). I will reckon that after a few minutes – or sooner, lol – they would realize I am not a GG. Assuming their attitude and friendliness didnt change after that, I’d be happy to continue chatting. If we really connected i would even consider meeting them again somewhere, be it a park, restaurant, donut shop, whatever. I WOULD NOT give my number or address to a complete stranger after just meeting them, though.
Saying that, if we really did hit it off I would certainly want to see them again, and after that, who knows what may happen? It is rare and wonderful thing meeting those people who you naturally click and feel a bond with…. those people are keepers 😊.
Stevie
Seems like everyone assume it’s a “him”, from what I read it can be a “her” as well.
I been out dressed and talked to strangers, anything from a wave, a “thanks” when they say “nice boots” or a short chat about weather/the dog/directions or so.Over all no one ever been even a little negative to me.
/kelly
I am a trans woman, I take public transit to and from work every day. I am approached by strangers at the bus stops or on the bus almost every day. I also go shopping , out to eat, to get my hair done, go to the doctor, all of these often have me talking with strangers, men and women, young and old.
I do pass as a woman, and I can speak in a feminine voice, so I believe most people I encounter just see me as another lady.hugs,
Ms. Lauren M
Been there many time#. Pretty hard to order a meal at the Outback or wherever without talking. Many workers at cash registers also will comment on hair, clothe#, nails, etc. so a conversation developers. People out there are too stressed and too busy in their daily lives to give a shit who you are or how you look. Stopped by the police once in a Ride Program and all they did was a double take when they compared my licence with the babe in the car driving. Lol. No one cares .
I would just respond as I normally would, in a friendly manner as I would anytime. Of course, it would depend on the intentions of the other. When I am out I just enjoy the experience and don’t try to run from the fact I am a guy in a dress. Most people do not care about my experience, so I do not stress about it. If somebody says hello, I just respond as anybody would. My response would be different if I felt threatened.
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