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I recently reviewed my life and I realized that Jennifer was much happier and more successful than the other guy. For my first fifteen years out of college I had male jobs and those did not go well. Then I ran 2 businesses for 20 years with a much more feminine frame and I was very successful. I had a female staff and none of them left. I always made they felt safe in our office. We were one family. Just wondering how you femme side influenced your working career.
As a Surgeon in the Army…that would have made for a great Sit Com!!
As a Surgeon in civilian life, much easier…workable!
As a musician…much easier, not as much opportunity as the Drummer, than say….the keyboard guy.
It all worked out…retired in 2017 ( started medical school in 1967).
Been dressing 67 yrs.
Love…Dr.T.J.
Hello Jennifer.
Although I work in drab…I work with a completely female team….I’m just one of the girls at work…..nothing is ever mentioned, but I’m privvy to so much more than a ” mere man ” would be allowed to share. We all get on incredibly well and are a very close knit team …it’s beautiful.
I wouldn’t swap my job for something that paid far more….sometimes there’s more to life than cash.
Grace xx
came out to all at my work since really had no other choice specially with breasts showing through shirts and other features. Seems like everyone is accepting me as myself. Am a boss for about 20 guys and they think it nice to have a female as a boss. And one that can cut up at times.
Although I put “kept completely separate,” that’s not 100% true.
First off, I have been wearing panties every day to work for a number of years now. We have a gym at work, and I have learned to wear black panties and how to hide them when changing in the locker room.
Second, through an app sponsored by work, a few years ago they started rewarding us with points which could be exchanged for gift cards if we reached a certain step level each day. I found I wasn’t getting the number of steps needed on weekends (or on days I would work from home). I decided to take walks around my neighborhood on the weekends to reach the goals. It only took me one weekend before I decided if I’m going to have to walk for these goals, I would do it en femme. Now technically this isn’t for work, but since it is sponsored by them they aren’t completely separate either.
One morning (maybe 3:30 AM) I had to drop my daughter off early morning for a senior trip. When I got home, I changed into women’s clothes and had my guy stuff packed. I arrived at work around 5 AM, went into my office, closed the door, and watched some mandatory training videos for a couple of hours. Before anyone else came in anywhere close, I changed back.
One Saturday evening I got a call about a problem with our production software misbehaving. I was partially dressed at the time, but didn’t have a work computer at home so I had to go into the office. I put male clothing on top, but when I got to the office and closed the door, I removed the men’s clothes and worked on the problem with our support team. When I left, since there was practically no one around (if there was anyone, it would not likely be someone who knows me) I left en femme.
When the pandemic hit, I was en femme almost all the time. To save on the bandwidth of the corporate network, we were told not to use video, so I could stay dressed in obvious feminine clothing and a wig while working, even in meetings. I did make a couple of trips in to the office on weekends en femme (to pick up cables for example). And my weekend en femme walks became almost daily walks (only bad weather forced me to walk indoors).
Now I’m back in the office 3 days a week, and working from home the other 2, so I am doing my en femme walk 4 days a week (2 work days, 2 weekend days).
I work for a well known restaurant chain. I’ve been out since February there. Its made no difference to advancement, I could try for promotion if I wanted but its not worth it.
The management actually prefer me as Trish. I’m more relaxed, open and generally happier. So easier to be around. Chris was a moody and angry git at times. I’m still seen as too emotional some times, just less often.
Love Trisha
Not sure if this applies, but over the years I’ve been a peacemaker and confidante. I’m far more empathetic (or is that sympathetic? Dang, always mixing those up) than any of the MEN I’ve work with, for, or around.
I’ll chalk that up to Rei even though she hadn’t made herself known due to the deep closet she was shoved into. What a trooper that girl!
I live my daily domestic life as a male; wife is unsupportive of my feminine side. This also includes my employment, wearing a stiff police officer style uniform leaves no reason to come out at work.
However, I’m gaining more confidence in wanting to reveal my gender fluidity and a few days ago an opportunity arose that I came out to a co-worker. She was very supportive and non-judgmental and thanked me for trusting her with my secret.
I chose “was kept completely sep” as the response. Because, to the people that I most closely work with/manage, it is…
That being said, I recently joined the PRIDE Business Impact Network for Palo Alto at HP(where I work).
That led to an HR person reaching out to me and asking if I would be interested in helping to launch a Remote employee(like me) PRIDE Impact Network. I jumped at it.
We launched it officially a few weeks ago(still in June) and had our Kickoff Virtual Party a week ago today.
So, what doe that mean? It means I’ve helped to create a safe place within HP(VERY accommodating in the Diversity and inclusion arena) for anyone in the LGBTQ+ community to BE themselves. I have even joined meetings in FULL Rayna…
I told people about my need to keep Rayna apart from work life due to the well known lack of acceptance that I would receive and a woman that was an Ally expressed her sadness over that while trying to just be supportive, she started crying…. for ME…. I was stunned.
So, maybe there will be a day that Rayna will appear at work instead of drab me… But I at least have a place to be ME while I’m at work now…
XOXO
Rayna
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I’m retired now and have been pretty much for the past 6 or 7 years so I’m free to take a lot more risks dressing than I ever could when working.
Being a boss in the construction trade, my fem side affected my work at times when I was a bit too caring or sympathetic toward one of my workers. Construction bosses are supposed to be uncaring and demanding I suppose. I thought nothing of it until I got reactions or feedback like “What do you care?” then others would try to take advantage of my soft nature. It didn’t help things when one of the workers saw the top of my red satin panties one time.
I have been retired for 7 years. While I occasionally underdressed at work, I kept my feminine side secret. However, my feminine side is always a part of me, even if not outwardly evident. I feel it made me a more compassionate and understanding boss. It may be hubris, but I feel most of my staff, especially the women, enjoyed working for me. Many said I was the best boss they had.
While my feminine side was not on display at work I think it had a great impact on the way the career I retired from went.
The two main professions I had would, in the past, be considered macho (even though now there are plenty of women in these professions). I was in the Army for 5 years and I am retired Police Officer. In my law enforcement career my feminine side made me a more compassionate person and as such not only a better person in general but also a better police officer.
Hugs
Liara
Hi Jennifer,
I’m not sure I ever thought of it in the terms of your poll.
I’m long retired. My career was in educational computing, where women, either staff or (much more so) students were in the minority. There’s good and bad in all walks of life, and it’s not a simple ‘women good, men bad’, but there was always a whiff of sexual discrimination – sometimes more like a stink in some sad individuals – and undoubtedly institutional biases. For me it wasn’t exactly a crusade, but I made damn sure there was a level playing field where my influence had some sway.
If that was my femme side coming out, then fine. I just thought it was ‘me’. The consequence though, was that sometimes this attitude brought me into conflict with some folk.
I should also point out there were many fine men in the mix. Of course you never quite know colleagues’ foibles, but they never struck me as anything other than nice guys – nothing to do with their perceived gender.
Marti xxx
The two are completely separate for me, I’m in “manly” male mode at the office (although working from home right now) and fem Jess when at home, which is much more often these days. When not on a zoom meeting I’m dressed when working at home, so technically these days I feel fem while working although I’m not at the office.
Yes, my feminine side was kept totally separate from any of my jobs. Well, that is, except for when I would go on a business trip and have a hotel room to myself and be finished with the obligatory business dinner…then!!! in the quiet and solitude of my room, I would enjoy my feminine side with items tucked in the bottom of my suitcase. Or the only once or twice I underdressed and went to work. I stopped that as I didn’t need the distraction it would cause me preventing me from concentrating on what I needed to be doing so I would get paid appropriately. But I don’t think either counts.
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