It’s ever likely that your journey started in stealth, absolute secrecy. Only you were becoming aware of your curiosity. Which became your inner desires, which became your secret endeavours, which became your closeted journey; it didn’t take long to realise that this journey was undeniable. It had you gripped, like a brassiere harnessing a breast, like nylon shrink-wrapping itself around your inner CD soul. Silk, the milk of your new life, nurturing you at every dainty step.
You realised, you are not only a normal inquisitive human, you are on the fringes, the outskirts of the society imposed on you. Or at least that’s what you thought, at your secretive beginning: “I’ll just keep this to myself”. Hiding even an uncomfortably slightly longer glance, a millisecond-too-long glimpse of her legs. The nylons, the silky sensuality, the sensuality you were stealthily coming to enjoy, becoming part of your journey, now your life. Yes, gripped, undeniably gripped.
You then needed to square this off with whatever regime and protocol had been imposed on you, either in the playground or the playpen. You pondered and rationalised quietly, in the company of your protective stealth. You carried on, determined, stealth here, stealth there, stealth everywhere. For if it was your secret, it only impacted you, the silky you.
Now, bolder and bolder, you are pushing the boundaries, inquisitive to see just exactly what is on the horizon, over the brow of a buxom hill before you, getting ever closer with every femme step. Yet your steps are still somehow tentative and guarded.
And then, quite a few craggy steps further on, over the sunlit brow, you see it: a place of perfect peace, a place of enlightenment, a place where your desires are fulfilled, and any suffering simply silk-smoothes away. Nirvana, your secret Nirvana. Your Heaven on Earth. You cuddle down in contentment.
With enlightenment comes realisation – why stealth, why secrecy, why conform? Why not share, why not spread your gossamer wings, and fly? For, once flying, there are no perilous stepping stones, it is a flourishing, three or four-dimensional freedom, floating in a sunlit sky, walking in the air, the breeze has you safe. Stealth, you realise, is no longer your friend; in fact, it may never have been – it is actually reining you in. They need to know, you want them to know; and then the truth dawns, they most likely already know. And then comes the further realisation, that has you soaring out over the sparkling seas – they know, and they don’t actually mind.
Stealthy, you realise, is not healthy. Not any more, at least, not for you.
So true. Stealthy, just another way of hiding. The fear of others discovering our true selves, our secret. It’s why it seems most of us become introverts. Most never break free, never soar, although, like you say, once you do you find that most people (there will always be more horses asses than horses) really don’t care, or even notice. We are our own worst enemy.
Hugs,
Jennifer
Valentina,
thank you for writing this article about me and my stealth habits. The closet door has begun to open for me at home with my dear SO. Who knows where it will all lead? Maybe one day my perceived need for stealth will melt away. Hugs, Dee
@Dee Smith I certainly do hope the witch flies away on her broom ☺️
@valentina16 Hi, Valentina! I believe, as you pointed out, that stealth (not unlike our individual femininity itself) is on a spectrum for which our position will change based on a variety of contributing factors (age, personal relationships, etc.) For me personally, I plan to eliminate the last vestiges of stealth in the weeks ahead – to finally come out to my grandchildren and business associates, (I own my business) because as I’ve become older and hopefully wiser, I realize that stealth has never been healthy for me, because it’s more than just wearing pretty clothes and makeup – stealth was… Read more »
One thing about being stealthy is that it can add to the thrill and excitement as many newbies have experienced
Oh mercy I LOVE this and needed this at this exact moment in my journey! TY Valentina!
