I Am ” One “.

Be one with the woman inside

I am ” One “.
One of you.
One of ” THEM “.

I live within the containment of this room that I have created. Some call it an escape. Some, a haven. Some, a prison or a cell. I look to the outside world and dream.  I lament. I bite my time. I wait for the next moment that I can be free. That one fleeting minute that I can cast off my chains, open the door and exhale. Ah, the sweet freedom of Aphrodite. The chance, at that one exact moment, to love my spiritual self. To touch the feminine fire within my soul and to let that heat energize my spirit. To be lifted up to the clouds and finally be at peace with myself. All, in one moment in time.

I await that next chance because at times I feel like it is the greatest sensation in the world, and it is all mine. Yes, I am selfish about it. I extract the most pleasure from it. The highest of highs. The ultimate in being. I created her. She is my extension. My freedom. My palate to create a masterpiece. My Mona Lisa. My Venus. My true avatar. She is as much of me as I can be. She helps me find my center. She anchors my soul. Within that time of being, nothing else matters. I am not me anymore. I am beauty. I am feminine. I am painted and on display to my world. I am no longer a square peg trying to fit into an oblique hole. I am complete. I am one. I exhale.

Transgender Heaven - Gender Journey

And again, I wait. Confinement. Isolation. Longing. It is the role I have accepted and play. It is the path I wander. It is the true me. Without expectations or demands, she exists within the shadows. Awaiting freedom. Paining to be unchained and free.
I am ” One “,
I am Joanna.
I await my rebirth.

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Joanna R.

AKA Triple D or DDJ. Along with the other J’s we are the newest arrivals to the Corps. We each bring a sympathetic and caring ear to the chat room. Joanna R is from South Florida and hopes she can help you to find the confidence to step out into the real world.

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9 Comments

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  1. Hope Clark 11 months ago

    You look, fab, Joanna. Freedom to ya, hun.

    Hope

  2. Jessica Flower 1 year ago

    This was so beautiful, and you are so beautiful Joanna. Thank you.

  3. Lauren P. 3 years ago

    Wonderfully written piece Joanna! Captures the feelings that I am sure many of us can relate to. Love this…

    <3 Lauren

  4. Jasmine 3 years ago

    This “prose” piece is actually a poem. What a beautiful command and use of the English language. What a beautiful poem. Such depth. Such communication. Such Truth.

  5. *skippy1965(Cynthia) 3 years ago

    Joanna,
    a beautiful story from a beautiful woman who deserves to be let out even more often! Looking forward to reading more from you!

  6. Cara Love 3 years ago

    Very well said, Joanna! You describe exactly how I’m feeling right now, and the freedom that we all strive for. Thanks for your beautiful words.

    Cara <3

  7. Tracey Rose 3 years ago

    That is absolutely amazing Joanna. I couldn’t believe you said rebirth – about 4-5 weeks ago I had the most amazing feelings overwhelm me, although my hiding and denial journey had taken many, many decades, this feeling was amazing and I came out to two important people within a couple of days of this feeling of yes, rebirth. I’m writing an abridged version 🙂 of my story in case you lovely people here would like to read it.

    But you Joanna , have touched me greatly – thank you!

    Tracey x

  8. julianne w 3 years ago

    absolutely beautiful and resonates with me and I will bet most all of us closet girls. Thanks for your being able to express our feelings for us .love and hugs Julianne

  9. Lesley 3 years ago

    That is truly wonderful Joanna. Could it be put any better? I doubt it.

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