“Why do women get all the fun fashions and what’s wrong if a guy like me wears them”, I often wonder.

Searching the internet, I’ve found lots of websites targeted towards CD or TS individuals.  There seem to be only a few references to guys, like me, who simply like wearing women’s fashions, but have no desire to pass as a woman.  This feeling has no explanation, no matter how much I think about it or try to research it.

Simply, I love the way women’s fashions look, and I have this deep, inherent desire to wear those fashions, from heels and flats, to mesh tops and lace tops, to cute party dresses and formal dresses, to exquisite lingerie.  I have no interest in makeup or wigs, I really like my guy face and how it challenges people’s thoughts when they see me dressed up in women’s clothing.

It took me a long time to admit that I was actually a crossdresser.  I often thought of myself as just a guy who likes to “try on women’s clothes”.  At first, the term crossdresser seemed to me as reserved for someone who really wanted to look like a woman.  042716 cdh angel b

With no interest in transitioning, my daily struggle is how to be true to myself while trying to make sure most of my world doesn’t know that I’m a crossdresser.

Advice, comments, questions, email are all welcome.  I’m just hoping to hear if any of have had similar experiences and struggles, or know someone like me, “Just a guy wearing women’s fashions.”

  1. Michelle 3 years ago

    Hi all :). I’m thrilled to have found this site; I’ve enjoyed reading your post Lea, and all the successive comments by everybody.
    I’m actually a straight cisgender (?) woman. I’m just learning the terms. However, I’m here because at 48 I have two young boys, special needs, one who likes to wear girls clothes, the other I found (after gentle non-leading questions) feels ‘like a girl inside’, and really doesn’t like being called a boy. He (she?) is 6, my CD is 8. Fairly certain my CD is just that, but after hearing (brother) say he feels like a girl inside, D (8) said ‘me too, I want to be a girl! So far, I’ve tried to reduce the wearing of the one outfit each has, out in public, (tho D’s meltdowns have seen it happen It’s just not worth that distress or the fight), because the world s cruel enough of what they don’t understand. Now, they mostly don’t want the ridicule.
    I started my search trying to figure if D was TG, BG, CD, etc. I really think he’s CD, unless M’s admission and my acceptance, changed his thoughts, but it sounds like M is TG. Now I’ve found y’all, I’d love it if you all could/would throw out some suggestions. I want them to be happy and healthy, which is why they even have a *girls’* outfit to begin with. I’d rather not repress them, but other people…., and their ages….

    • Author
      Lea 3 years ago

      Michelle, you are a super-mom, that mom who suppresses her own fear in search for the happiness of her kids.

      From various CD sites, you’ll find that many of us started having these girly feelings when we were toddlers, way before adolescence.

      Some non-CD sites will say many boys have girly feelings and outgrow them, but there is no follow up to see if that was really true or just suppression.

      Only your boys are going to know which term truly fits them, only after they’ve grown old enough to experience puberty and attraction. I can understand that desire to figure out a label that explains them, continue to show them you’re open-minded, that you love them regardless, and they’ll stay honest with you as they figure life out.

    • Danielle(Dani) 3 years ago

      Michelle, I do applaud you for being here and for being understanding and wanting to learn about it. I know my mother did not react anywhere near in that manner and it further strained our already poor relationship forever.

      I did want to say that in my search for information I have stumbled onto a forum or two that was just of mom’s of CD’s. It seems they may have primarily been in England. They were mostly positive and supportive conversations. I only perused a conversation or two and was not able to join as I am not a mom. In addition to what you find here you might find some supportive communities like that.
      Of course you’ll want to be sure and find the right one for you.

      Glad to see you here. I’m new myself but I hope to see you around.

    • romi chambers 3 years ago

      Let them wear what the heart desires ,love all around will be doubled

    • romi chambers 3 years ago

      Just buy them some girl underclothes panties slips training bra if they would like it could be worn under male clothes there are also sites like homme mysterre that caters to crossdressers also on amazon and ebay also just a thought hope it helps

      • Stefanie 2 years ago

        i too just like the clothes
        i like the way they look on my athletic build
        i dont want a wig or femme make up though i d like to try some eyliner
        tight jeans peep toe platforms bras nice shirt or sweater that would be me if i could and i love the way my feet look with polish
        men need polish more than women it makes youe feet look way better

        i m with you the clothes are the draw

  2. Codille Benton 3 years ago

    Great Article Lea!!!!! Just found a FB page that was about mens fashion with a female twist. If the site is solid I will share!

    • Author
      Lea 3 years ago

      Thanks Codille. Hope that FB page is legit, would be nice to see something like that getting more popularity on FB (and making my fashion choice feel more real).

  3. Danielle(Dani) 3 years ago

    To the topic at hand. I made a post on Quora recently. Someone asked what articles of women’s clothing could a male get away with wearing without being noticed.
    To back up a little, I’m a fairly observant person. I went back to college late in life and while on that journey I noticed one day that one of my classmates was in his business suit for a presentation and while sitting down his pant legs raised up and exposed his droopy socks and bare ankles. I found this to be tacky and unprofessional. I turned to men’s style forums to see what the solution was. They said
    “over the calf” socks which I guess is the way they make men feel better about buying knee high socks.
    It turns out that men’s over the calf socks dress socks are not too common and when they are too be found they are pretty plain, just basic black or navy. So this is what I went on to share on Quora. I started shopping for women’s knee high dress socks. There’s almost no difference. The styles are very similar and it’s pretty trendy for men to wear colorful and patterned socks right now. The only real issue I ran into is that I have large calves and women’s socks don’t have as much room in that area. I bet I put together an assortment of close to a hundred pair of different colors and patterns of socks. This really wasn’t a CD thing for me. I had previously dressed rather poorly and wanted to change that. So I purchased two sport coats and had them tailored down, my tailor turned me onto some wool slacks at one of the club stores and I bought an assortment of those, and I put together a snazzy selection of colored and pattered shirts. I started wearing different pocket squares with it every day. I could and still can make all different professional and snazzy combinations.

    I said this had nothing to do with CD. Maybe buying women’s socks did, maybe it didn’t, but dressing well like that does a lot in the same way that CD does for me. Maybe it’s the fit or the fabrics or colors. I don’t know, but I definitely feel better wearing all that than I do in a worn out pair of jeans and a nasty t shirt.

    • Author
      Lea 3 years ago

      Thanks for sharing that experience Danielle! Nice to hear that you found a way to come up with professional and snazzy fashion combinations.

      I completely agree, simply wearing womens socks doesn’t seem like a CD thing. After all, I sometimes hear of women who wear men’s briefs, undershirts, or socks because of how practical and fitting they can be, and those women don’t think of it at all that’s it’s a CD thing.

      I too have always been very observant about fashion. It seems so stereotypical that fashionable guys are made out to be gay. That seems to be changing as some NFL and NBA players are getting “dressed up” for post-game interviews and making sure they look good off-the-court/field.

      I too feel better in cute women’s clothes rather than the grimy, worn, baggy attire I see many guys call weekend wear. For me, it’s the tighter fit, the softer feel, the unique styles, the countless options, and the name brands (at thrift stores) that I enjoy about women’s clothes.

      The way feminine outfits make me feel has a lot to do with how much I admire those same fashions when they look good on women. Flats and skinny jeans are a look that could work for most women, and I love how I feel in that look. Heels make cute outfits look amazing, and I enjoy how long my legs look and how amazing tall I Iook.

      It amuses me that there are also so many women that will take a cute fashion and make it look terrible by wearing the wrong size, looking a mess, or just giving off that they really don’t care what they look like. So I try to be careful about wearing feminine outfits tha are flattering, appropriate for the time/day/weather, and look put together.

      It just feels so much easier (and fun) to put together a cute, comfortable feminine outfit than try to rummage for the equivalent masculine outfit.

      P.S. I recently discovered how comfortable women’s pants and leggings are.

      • Danielle P 3 years ago

        Your closing comment struck home for me. I’m fairly new to the CD lifestyle, and I’m not brave enough (yet) to go dress shopping, so I bought a pair of leggings that look like jeans, but they feel like sweatpants material. Paired with my peep toe heels, they slim my legs up and look fabulous! I expect they’ll do in a pinch for winter underwear, too, which will give me an “undercover” feminine feeling.

      • romi chambers 3 years ago

        Leggings jegging are very comfortable tights are also! It is ok to be stylish rMens running tights are also very comfortable gives the very illusion of wearing painted on outerwear!

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