The old Chinese proverbs talk about the yin and the yang. We are all possessed with both the yin and the yang, or the female and the male. It is when we are born that one of them dominates and that is what our outward appearance is going to be. But that is not to say the one that is not the dominant trait will not come alive at one time or another. And it all depends on how we acknowledge that fact as to how we wish to live our lives.

I grew up in a house with four sisters and my mom and they all had an influence on me, whether I admitted it to them or not. From around my early teenage years, I remember being somewhat jealous of all of them because of all the pretty clothes they got while I was getting the usual boy things. I was happy that they were so happy but deep down I wished that some of them were mine. When I got to be 15 I knew that I had to see for myself just how they looked on me. So when I had time to myself I took a few things out the see how they looked. It was so wonderful to see how they fit and how they felt. After that, any chance I got I wanted to try things on, making sure that I only took things that looked like they would fit me, considering that all of my sisters were different heights.

There were a few times that I almost got caught wearing something, and even though it scared the daylights out of me, I couldn’t seem to help myself. As they all got older, (considering that I was the oldest) their tastes began to change and that only gave me more options to try on. Whether it was dresses, skirts, blouses, or lingerie, there always seemed to be something to try on and indulge my fantasies. And even when going out with girls, I always seemed to compliment them on what they were wearing, which made them feel good. I guessed then that making women feel that someone was paying attention to their appearance made them feel good about themselves.

Time marched on and I got married and stopped dressing up, but I still paid attention to clothes. About 10 years ago the urges started to come back. But now since I had a good job, I was able to start to create my own little wardrobe. Just a few things at first, all the while getting stares from sales girls when I went in to buy lingerie or looking at racks of clothes. I was a little timid at first but now I feel so comfortable shopping for myself that I just smile back at them.

Meanwhile, I feel the genes that have been passed down from my mom make me feel so happy about the choices I have made for myself. And to slide on, whenever I can, those Gloria Vanderbilt jeans lets me feel that the women in my life are so lucky to put these on anytime they want. I don’t go out in them but I feel like a woman when they are on. That’s when I know that the yin is coming to the forefront. And that’s OK by me.

EnFemme

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Leslie Ravenous
Lady
Member
6 years ago

Awesome article. It is crazy how we go through life with these feminine feelings thinking that we are alone. Our life journey seems very much the same.

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago

It is so true Leslie. I had denied these feelings for quite a few years and now that I feel so comfortable just going out and shopping for myself I can’t help but feel giddy. Thanks for reading and liking the article.

Trina Hill
Trina Hill
6 years ago
Reply to  Renee T

You might have put my name on that post Renee except I was the youngest out of six,ever since I can remember i have wanted to and have crossdresser I love the way a pair of size large jeans feels when you slip them on over a tight thing just feels so Right,thank you

Trina Hill
Trina Hill
6 years ago
Reply to  Renee T

Thong

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago

It is Leslie. Sometimes I sit back and think about how my life would have been totally different if my one chromozone would have been the other way. But the experience of putting on my favorite femme things gives me the next best thing.

Lilly Boy
Lilly Boy
6 years ago

It really is crazy i started experiencing about 12 years old when my older sister started wearing sexy panties and lingerie and that was itvi fell in love with the feeling. Eventually she caught on and i told her what i was doing and she was cool with it to my suprise. But in the end she couldn’t keep my secret. To bad I can’t trust my own sister

Kristinaaz Redding
Member
6 years ago

I enjoyed your article. Identified with it. Thanks for sharing

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago

Thanks so much Kristinaaz. I am glad that you liked it.

Kim Paige' class='avatar avatar-64 photo' height='64' width='64' />
Kim Paige
6 years ago

Renee,
Thanks for sharing this! No matter how many different posts like this I read, I’m always surprised by how easily I relate to them! So comforting to read!!
Kim

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago
Reply to  Kim Paige

Thank you so much Kim. I feel so much joy when I read something like your reply. I am really happy that I have found others who can relate to it and tell me just how they are.

Kim Paige' class='avatar avatar-64 photo' height='64' width='64' />
Kim Paige
6 years ago
Reply to  Renee T

…and speaking ok jeans; while I’m in the closet; I’ve started wearing femme low rise jeans to the office on a daily basis and even added a skinny femme belt: a few times I’ve thought about returning to drab – khakis or jeans, just can’t do it…love the way the low rise feels and while deep pockets in drab wear may be more practical there’s just something about shallow femme pockets that just makes me feel better!

skippy1965 Cynthia
Ambassador
Trusted Member
6 years ago
Reply to  Renee T

I stealth dress every day at work myself-everything I’m wearing is female clothes-ladies penny loafers, ladies khaki slacks, ladies polo shirt, cami, undies and trouser socks plus my earrings. Been doing it for almost 2 years now and no plans to stop or return to guys clothes!
Cyn

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago
Reply to  Kim Paige

That is wonderful Kim. So does anyone know or make any comments about your jeans? You are so right in that wearing femme jeans just feels so much better than a pair of jeans made for a guy. The legs feel so much better and the slimming fit is the best

Kim Paige' class='avatar avatar-64 photo' height='64' width='64' />
Kim Paige
6 years ago
Reply to  Renee T

Renee,
One woman commented “wow those are skinny jeans…but you have the legs for them…” it was on a fairly crowded elevator a few weeks ago. One of the cashiers in our cafeteria has definitely noticed – she looks me up and down every time.
Kim

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago
Reply to  Kim Paige

Kim and Cynthia, thank you both. You have made me so appreciative of this forum and how we can share stories like these. I just love that other women will comment in the positive on wearing obvious feminine things and not put you down for it. I have started slowly with lingerie underneath my outside clothes, but I guess little steps first.

Leonara
Ambassador
Trusted Member
6 years ago

Renee,
Thank you for writing an article to which so many girls can relate, especially yours truly… I also liked your previous article Dress with Confidence… Please keep your articles coming which are so welcome to CDH…

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago
Reply to  Leonara

Thank you so much Leonara. I am hoping to write more soon. I have written some fiction stories posted elsewhere but I think I am going to write more here.

Stephanie Donaldson
Lady
6 years ago

Nice. I like how you do YOU.

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago

Thank you so much Stephanie. Nice to feel comfortable in your own clothes

Kara Kelly
Lady
6 years ago

Great article, Renee.

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago
Reply to  Kara Kelly

Thanks so much Kara. I am so glad you enjoyed it.

Nolene Venus
Lady
6 years ago

Thank you for the encouragment i gained from your article i started loving my feminine side very late but am learning so much from this forum nolene

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago
Reply to  Nolene Venus

I am so glad I could help, even if just a little Noelene. It is so nice when you find your feminine side makes you feel so whole

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago

Thanks to everyone who has read and replied to my article. It was one of those things I felt I had to talk about and I am so glad that it resonated with so many of you. Hope to write more soon.

Sandra Nichols
Sandra Nichols
6 years ago

Renee
Thank you for sharing. I too have been dressing almost all my life. I have one sister and two brothers. Well as the youngest I shared a bedroom with my sister until about eight years old. She is 10 older than me. I would wear her clothes and dress like her and wish I was her

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago
Reply to  Sandra Nichols

I know just how you feel Sandra. Do you think she ever realized that you were wearing her things? I can’t be 100% sure myself but no one ever said anything to me. And I was so careful as to not disturb much and definitely not ruin anything. Lovely to hear from you and hope to again.

Sandra Nichols
Sandra Nichols
6 years ago
Reply to  Renee T

Hi Renee
No I don’t think my sister ever suspected I wore her clothes.
Private message me if you like to chat
Sandra

Milena
Milena
6 years ago

Great article, Renee. You must get tired of all of us that say we agree with you. But it IS so very true. Life is totally mysterious. Just look at all the gender variations in the natural world. No one should get hung-up about it. Just try to do what feels right and seems to make you happy. You just can’t worry and be in turmoil about it. Self-acceptance cannot be denied. Enjoy life’s journey to the best of one’s ability.

Renee T
Renee T
6 years ago
Reply to  Milena

Thank you Milena. I do try to live my life the way it makes me feel the most comfortable. I never get tired of everyone relating to the story and love to hear how others have grown up in a similar way. Even though we may not be able to dress this way all of the time it is so comfortable when we can.

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