From the very first time I picked up my mother’s pantyhose and ran my hand over the silky smoothness I was hooked. I found a discarded pair and just had to try them on – the feeling was electric. I ran my hands up and down my nylon encased legs and it was heavenly. The only other thought I had was that it was somehow a bad thing to do. Here I was a boy wearing pantyhose and loving it. I was so ashamed that I had tried them on. I knew I had crossed some kind of normal behavior. I felt that I was a terrible person and that there had to be something wrong with me. I was ashamed and excited at the same time. I took them off and hid them away, knowing I would like to wear them again.
I sometimes came home from school and before mother would come home from work I would go through her stocking drawer and run my hands through her things . This was at a time before most women stopped wearing dresses and hose. The sound of a woman wearing stockings while walking, with the nylon rubbing together on their legs was exciting and made me want to have that experience. This is where it all began – my journey into that forbidden world, the place where boys were not allowed to go.
We were supposed to admire girls wearing stockings not want to wear them. The secret had to be kept because if anyone knew I would be most certainly be punished, ridiculed and embarrassed. How could I deal with that? My friends would never associate with me, it would be as if I had some terrible disease. This desire had to remain my secret.
Whether my mother knew that I was playing with her things or not she never questioned me. Looking back I do not know what I would have done. The next piece of female attire I tried on was high heels. I had looked at them while I was putting on my pantyhose, usually the discarded ones with runs in them, and wondered what it would be like to wear them. It wasn’t long before I gave in to my thoughts and slid my nylon encased feet into a pair. I had watched women walk in them and wondered what it would be like and when I took a few steps in them that first time feelings overwhelmed my senses. I knew I was hooked AGAIN . My feet were almost the same size as my mother’s so most of her shoes fit. They were slightly too big but I did not care. Each time I wore them I would carefully put them back and place them exactly as I found them.
This is how my secret began and I will write more about it in my next installment.
Ricki
I tried to fight the want to dress feminine but the woman in me took over. I am happiest in a dress or corset or skirt and top and heels plus a garter belt plus stockings plus a lovely bra large breast forms plus panties.
Woman’s clothing feels so natural on me I feel not myself when I don’t have it on. I would love to find a woman that lves to see me dressed as a female.
oh yes it does, love the feeling of female cloths then male cloths. nylons are great in the winter. but nothing like dressing up all the way and be your self. for me its a stress release and depression release medication also. just wish we all could come out of the closet and just be us feminine and free
I agree.
Hi Ricki, pantyhose were my gateway drug into CDing as well.
Still don’t feel like I’m completely dressed without them on.
For the life of me I can’t figure out why so many natural born females seem to hate them. I certainly notice the ones who still wear them though.
I wear them most of the time now especially now when it is cold also keeps me feeling fem
Finally cold weather has arrived. Pantyhose or thigh hi’s for me either enfemme or underdressed.
my cross dressing started when i had to wear nylons in a school play, the feeling of them was so intense that i was hooked. at home i tried my grandmothers nylons and soon went to a dress and heels, it was so exciting i could not stop. my grandmother soon found out but did not say any thing. my cding went away for awhile. then came back, its been 25 years on and off and now its on never off any more. i by my own dresses, skirts, nylons. make up and perfume at stores, ear rings on line… Read more »
My wife totally refuses to allow me to dress I spent a lot of years in the closet and it has only been 6 months since I told anyone about dressing .Up until then I dressed totally alone with my dreams loving to dress but ashamed of my desires . I finally found out that I was not alone and that there were many others who had similar desires and feelings
you are not alone with your desire to dress up and feel and look feminine. i am also one that love to dress up all pretty, wife will not help or see me even tho she sneaks to the basement to see what i am wearing this time and how pretty i look. i am not ashamed any more, thanks to Buffalo Bells. i feel normal when dressed pretty. this is who i should of been and not a male person. i am still in closet, daughter and wife know, but the other 2 boys NO. would love to get… Read more »
Hey, I finally found someone who likes to help me dress. She helps me with my dressing and makeup and we share clothes. It’s really a thrill when we go out somewhere and we go to the ladies room and change dresses and shoes. It really confuses our friends. What a huge comfort it is to trade clothes all the time. YES
I did not start with nylons or pantyhose but I quickly got nylons to go with the clothes. I started out one day just realizing I had to dress femme. I was hooked before I got those first clothing items.
I’m out and open and for the last 9 years, living as Rosaliy. Now that is my legal name and I am definitely here to stay.
I always liked the look the feel the way it made me feel as each item of clothing the pantyhose the shoes the bra the dresses and so on added to my desire to become more fem .i slowly realized I had to keep dressing to feel whole .i will in my future story explain how I decided to come out and tell what it was like and how it is today
Ricki
Can I butt in and say, “PANTYHOSE ARE THE BEST!"? Thank you.
I like pantyhose but for me stockings and garters are the best . I save them for special occasions though because of the excitement level
Ricki
i have read all the replys and mine is going to be about the same my wife knows but like some of you she hates me as joann but i love the feel of the cloths and makeup i dont care who knows but my wife is so afraid of me getting seen dressed up the world is not fair i want to be joann more and the mail me less
Hi Joann
I guess for me it was similar when she told me not to dress up again . You see she helped me dress up one Halloween but no one knew it was me because I wore a mask . I did have a couple of guys hit on me and I’m sure that made my wife uncomfortable it made me more excited . She also was amazed how easily I learned to walk in heels. Lol it was such a wonderful experience for me that I longed to do it again but it never happened
The way I got started was because my two younger brothers dared my to wear a pair of my mothers panties. I was 5 years old at the time. Looking back that was a good dare I won! LOL I’ve been caught once by mother and father with a pair of my mothers panties on when I was about 8 or 9. Didn’t stop me and I never will.
Hi Joan I tried to stop telling myself it was wrong and being embarrassed that I could not stop dressing . I never got caught but had some close calls which I will talk about in my following stories
Hi ! I am almost 68 yrs now (2 more days to go !) I started out with my Mom’s bra when I was 14 ! Got some acceptance from her when I told her that I needed to dress as a girl in an all boys school . She let me have her bra, blouse and skirt , rememberance of which still thrill me . I went into a closet, as I could not afford to dress when in the all boys Boarding School; I looked for ward to the holidays when I could do this in secret using… Read more »
Hi Margaret
The desire to dress never went away for me either . It seemed for me that I thought that I was expecting that at some point in my life that I would get over my feelings and would no longer dress but instead it seemed that it just got stronger .i am now at the point where I know I want and need to dress and I want to look like a lady . It is because of places like this that allow me to talk to others I am beginning to get some inner peace
Hi Ricki ! Thanks for your reply on this site ! After I got engaged, I did purge myself of all my feminine collection, which were mostly bras and skirts. But I found that I could not be without them and finally admitted to my wife . I also got a “pen-friend" from the “Sea-Horse Club" in Australia ; those days there were no “Internet" and e-mails . She helped me in my collection by sending me a corset and a bra, which I used for quite some time ! After a long time now I am developing this e-friendship,… Read more »
I am muskan I am from India I started dressing from my very child hood When i was kid I was very much attrected to wards lady dresses There was aunty next door to me She was yong and newly merried so she was having new dresses one day her husbend had gone on tour she requested my mother that to night i may be permitted to sleep at her house as she was alone so after finishing my dinner Iwent to her house she was wearing nighty gown her tits were bousing out i felt errection I WAS staring… Read more »
Thank you for your reply I do understand the feeling of wanting to dress
Ricki
wow, i have read ost of the stories on how we all started to cross dres. mine is the same, like i said in 1 of my stories. i thought my cross dressing would go away after awhile, but it got so strong that i need to dress up in female cloths from head to toe, whats the sense of just wearing nylons or a bra, might as well wear all of it. then i put my male cloths over my female cloths and go out. no one knows i am wearing a dress and nylons, bra, panties and pad.… Read more »
Thank you Lucinda for your experience my wife has seen me dressed before but now totally refuses to allow me to dress. I know I should dress in front of her anyway but I cannot bring myself to go against her wishes . I really am new to talking about dressing even though I have done it for years as I said in my story I have not got the courage to come out further even though the desire is so strong
Ricki