My wife and I both had a rare Friday off, so we took the opportunity to spend some quality time together and get out of town for a night. We packed for our stay in Kansas City, and I started working on my makeup. It had been two months since I’d done full makeup; it took much longer than expected. The new brushes and supplies from Ulta really came through! The new red lipstick looked fantastic, even though I knew wearing a face mask would smudge it later.

I got into the requisite underdressing and slipped into a nice light denim dress. Some support hose, my new cute brown booties, clip-on earrings, my wig, and a nice necklace borrowed from my wife, and I was all set!

We made the drive to KC under a sunny sky and unseasonably warm temperatures. I could wear that denim dress without a jacket, and we could have lunch on the patio of a nice restaurant. We arrived on The Plaza, a nice historical shopping district south of downtown KC and made tracks to White House Black Market. WHBM is probably my wife’s favorite store, and I have always been envious of the treatment she gets when she shops there.

If you have not been to WHBM, I highly recommend it! The sales associates are so helpful. They ask good questions, make recommendations, and take your items to “make up a dressing room” for you. Then, they add a bunch of items in the dressing room that will look great with the first pieces you select, so you end up trying on a bunch more items that always look fantastic. Excellent service. It is the ultimate dress-up party!

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The SA greeted us when we walked in with “Hello ladies!” and started in with my wife while I began browsing. I can tell you it is always so meaningful to be called a lady when I’m out and dressed. It enables me with confidence and puts me in the right mindset. Eventually, the SA made her way to me. We discussed the leggings and what types and sizes I liked. I told her I already owned a pair of pleather leggings, and that I was looking for some great tops to pair with them for the season.

She took me all over the store and made a ton of suggestions – it was almost overwhelming! I was thinking sweater, she grabbed a nice light burgundy blouse and made her way to the dressing room. I continued to browse and came across this lovely cabernet funnel-neck tunic sweater, which had an over-sized collar and a diagonal zipper from the neck all the way down the collar bone; it’s one of the more popular styles right now. I looked through the rack but couldn’t find a large, so I grabbed a medium.  The SA came to me and took the tops I had on my arm. I mentioned how I liked that sweater, but I didn’t see one in large. She said “The medium might fit, but I pulled the large for you. It’s already in the dressing room.” I love this place!

I went back to the dressing room to find the three tops I had selected, and another 5 tops were hanging there along with the faux leather leggings. The SA said they found a few more things that would pair well with those leggings. I quickly wiggled out of my dress and booties and slid into the most amazingly smooth, luscious, buttery-soft, shiny leather leggings I’ve ever had the pleasure of feeling. I pulled on the big, soft burgundy sweater, jumped back into my brown booties, and stepped out of the dressing room.

I couldn’t believe how wonderful I looked in the mirror!! It was exactly the type of outfit I was looking for. One of the SAs in the adjacent office looked out and said “I LOVE those leggings on you!  You certainly have the legs for them!” She said I had great legs!!! I never would have thought I would ever hear that in public!! These ladies certainly know how to flatter a crossdresser…

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I kept going back to the dressing room and trying on different tops, coming out to show off to the SA ladies, and at the end of it all, my wife spent about $300 and I got the cabernet sweater, a pink cami with lace trim, and this beautiful trim-fitted brown turtleneck sweater that just looked darling on me. By the way, all of these items will look great with the cabernet faux-leather leggings from WHBM, which I ordered online when I got home… I couldn’t resist!

We headed out and walked to lunch nearby at a restaurant that has nice vegetarian selections for my wife. The staff and customers there all treated me completely like I belonged, and I felt totally comfortable.

After lunch, we walked a couple blocks to H&M. The sun was out as we strolled. I definitely got more than a couple side-eyes and stares, a couple of double-takes, but no comments. My take on it? I don’t care. I love rattling their cages a bit. Either they don’t understand, and more than likely won’t convince them, or they are jealous of my courage and free will. In any case, they are not worth my time. My legs look nicer than any of theirs anyway… the sales associate in WHBM told me so!

Anyway, at H&M I saw what I feared the most – “Dressing rooms are closed”. Ugh!  We went in anyway, and I found about 243 different items of clothing that would have looked totally cute on me and my wife, but I won’t buy something without trying it on first. I got one good, solid side-eyed stare, but other than that, the SA ladies were very nice and helpful. I can’t wait until their dressing rooms reopen because they had some really cute clothes and GREAT bargains.

After H&M, we walked the couple blocks to “Made in KC” which features a myriad of products made in Kansas City or surrounding areas. My wife purchased a birthday card and two artisanal cookies. The girl checking us out commented “I love your dress!”  That felt great! We left and made our way back to the car.

…to be continued…


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Philma Bierstein

Mid-life CD. Professional, and I get out as Philma when I can. Slowly getting more comfortable in public, but not in my midwest mid-sized bigoted town... I have to travel about an hour to get to a town without aggressive criticism. Out to my wife and a few select friends, but closeted at work and in general, especially most of my family. Wishing acceptance was more normal, but knowing this region just isn’t ready for girls like us!
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Mika Malone
Active Member
3 years ago

I JUST got done looking at the WHBM website. It sounds like the boutique is worth going to just for the experience. I can’t wait to read part 2. Sounds like both of you had a wonderful time.

Amy Myers
Noble Member
3 years ago

What a wonderful experience that must have been. To go in to a store like you describe and try on so many different clothes. A truly memorable weekend! We don’t have WHBM stores here, but we do have H&M and they have some lovely clothes, and at quite reasonable prices. It is very interesting going out en femme, and I’ve got to the point, that like you I don’t care if someone “makes" me or not. In a way it helps our visibility to be seen as real, which I’ve discussed elsewhere on CDH. Thank you for sharing your very… Read more »

Amy Myers
Noble Member
3 years ago

That’s one of my concerns too when I’m out and about as Amy.

Jessica V.
3 years ago

Girl you continue to inspire me!

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