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by kyrabrooke
in

Gothic lace up, Lace trimmed cami, Gothic Cross layered dress, gothic fairy garter...Ruby choker...when lighting is right it sure helps! Thx Haley!

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Kyra Marin

I hope this isn't too long. A fourth son, played major roles in sports, (just as genetic girls do, just sayin'), had lots of girlfriends throughout grade/high school, lots of friends, popularity by teens lead to protecting those less so. By 12 something I had known for a long time before that, was becoming clearer and it was something kept secret from everyone, including my girlfriends, until 18, when one was supportive, she just knew it. That was heaven - she has always kept my legion to this day. I actually quit hockey at 12 (a psycho coach) and took up figure skating, completing my prelims in record time, (no easy feat), and was dating a very pretty girl on the team by the 2nd year. So, I knew I wasn't gay but I was something, that loved girly stuff...! (btw: I've gay/bi friends, and I support all people's joy). It was tough as hockey and these role idea "things" were easy for me to do socially, plus as I excelled. To be clear, I am a x-dresser, not looking to fully transition, and adore Victorian era clothes (not so much the era's politics), Goth, as mall as it may be, short skirts, long gowns, and soft lace and satin, and: tennis bracelets. My love for the feminine form, to express it, for that matter the sacred feminine is part of me from way before 12 and it came out in my love for beautiful clothes, wearing make up and once I am dressed up, outwardly, my nature shifts a bit. I really notice it now. Started shaving what body hair I had, by 16 (mostly my legs), and I am sure friends noticed, but said nothing~! My GF's, as I had no sisters, were a way to clothes (not being shallow, but just real) so I made up lots of teen boy "ego": excuses to get lingerie and what I could, even to grab stuff from the drama room. I lead a dual life and my current love is beautiful about it. Since, she had me come out to my Mom, which I had never considered ever, and as she had always wanted a daughter, thus me. I did not do so with my Dad, & they're together, but I asked that he not be told. (Is that fair on her?) I worried about how it might affect her emotionally as at 1st she had a lot of questions, but she has been cool, loves seeing our photo shoots and is stunned for sure at how I change with a few strokes of the pen and sees the rest of me as she always has. My love jokes, "I finally learned how to slow you down, ...put you in 6" heels" (or 7"). It's true. lol. Also, she told me she noticed when finishing to put on my eye liner and lipstick (I do my own make-up too, of course) that I shift to a very different guy; effeminate, gentler . I can recall being teased for some of my more fem traits quite young. "From animal to an angel, you skip the Z". I feel lucky and am grateful, so much so for having my girl so cool. I feel so much when I read stories longing for contact. Take care beautiful one's, things will grow and flower. Be patient with love. There was a period of "purging", getting rid of clothes between 'excepting' relationships etc...but that ended, when the NPO org I work for did a sensitivity training series, and in my research, I found an article by a married guy with a very similar story, except he had sisters. He'd dress up and walk around his neighborhood, like I would...which was a very very risky thing to do. When I read that it was a turning point of sorts. Turns out he is a very popular x-dresser, cover gurl. Since then, my collection of dresses, skirts, corsets and accessories take up a huge amount of space, again, I am so grateful. It certainly is more than clothes and lipstick, I can't say exactly what, but it's something I am increasingly embracing. It was not long after I met my current love, and she has encouraged things I seldom did, like going out dancing with her fully dressed up, which I had done yet more often on Halloween's where there was an excuse..lol. As a musician I often wore full make up and until recently (dumb dumb dumb) had hair down to my waste. I like my blonde bob, and have "hair" but if you have real long hair, take your time with that one!!!! I insist on mostly private clubs, as I dislike disrespect, can react strongly to it, yet I am sure I will open up more often to this. I know it. Never had trouble passing as a girl, even times when I wasn't dressed up per sa, but those stories I'll skip for now. I respect very much all aspects/choices of person's expression; am concerned for, and protective of this community, and its mental health. At a conference in Denver last summer, Pride was just starting, and a restaurant I went to almost daily, had a ton of beautiful people, and I made an effort to really meet everyone and show the complete respect the we all deserve; I want to help this world to heal. Oh, a friend of mine from the biz, a hot guitarist came out on Facebook (to a very large group of friends of all kinds), and DOH! I didn't even know it was him at 1st as she changed her name. His x-bandmate freaked out but seeing the overwhelming support, defense was lovely. Know, your true friends will always do this, even if it takes a while. I wrote him last month as he sent me B-Day wishes and told him my utter respect for his strength, beauty to come out as he did and told him of my own nature yet that I was a bit more private still, but that this was shifting. He loved receiving the news and the words of loving support, as I've known him since we were kids. Anyways, I guess this is a start. My main message to young people, anyone really, feeling this is be real, be you, and it's never about perfection but a true self-reflection. I am also a musician, I am involved in PAP, and psychotherapeutics, a techy, business owner and truly wish all a wonderful "now"... Never let the haters take their pain, and pass it onto you. Be kind, know forgiveness/compassion starts in the self, so spread as much love as you can, and find outlets to grow, as your inner healing allows. Peace, love, Kyra <3

Latest posts by Kyra Marin (see all)

    5 1 vote
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    April Flowers
    Baroness
    Trusted Member
    3 months ago

    Wonderful photo. So alluring and retro look that really stands out. I also loved reading your extensive profile….lovely story.

    Patty Phose
    Duchess
    Famed Member
    3 months ago

    Love it. So sexy.

    Melodee
    Managing Ambassador
    Noble Member
    3 months ago

    Well *that* is a whole lotta fabulous!

    Leslie
    Lady
    Active Member
    3 months ago

    An amazing photo. Everything is perfect: the setting, your pose, your clothes, your makeup. Should win awards.

    Lisa West
    Baroness
    Active Member
    3 months ago

    Super sexy goth outfit done perfect!

    Last edited 3 months ago by Lisa West
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