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by gemmalovegood
in

2024 hasn’t gone as I had hoped, with personal loss, and many changes that have restricted my desires to crossdress and interact with this community. But, I’m resolved to continue to try to improve those opportunities in the next year. This photo was from the first time I ever stepped outside (onto a balcony) en femme. I sat, and felt the breeze up my skirt, and through my hair. It was a feeling that I long to get back to. Soon, I hope. Cheers to all who are sharing and growing on this site. This place and all of you are such a comfort.

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Gemma Lovegood

Shy and kind closeted straight crossdresser. I started dressing very young (around 10), wearing my mother’s and sister’s things when I was alone. In my 20s I lived alone, and purchased several things of my own, including makeup. I worked for a gay man, and became a close friend of his, though I was and still am very straight. I went to several gay bars with him, and encountered many CDs, drag queens, and the full spectrum of the LGBTQ+ community. But, I could never find the courage to come out to him as a CD. I’m married for over two decades now and have never revealed my secret to my wife. We have countless gay friends (male and female), but I’ve never revealed myself to any of them. It seems strange, and is one of my biggest regrets. I’ve lived so long with this secret that it feels like I’ve passed a point of no return. Perhaps one day I’ll find the courage. I’m grateful for all of the friends and discussions I’ve had with others like me here at CDH. It truly feels therapeutic, and I’ve grown to accept these desires that I have, and to realize there are so many like me in the world. That gives me great peace.

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    Angela Wagner
    Managing Ambassador
    Famed Member
    3 months ago

    It’s great to see a photo from you, my friend. I remember very well this photo shoot from earlier in the year, and your time on that balcony. I’m glad you’re sharing a photo of it.
    I’m wishing you all the best, and hoping that 2025 turns out to be a better year for you. You will always be in my thoughts, Gemma.
    And in my heart.

    Jennifer Connolly
    Duchess
    Famed Member
    3 months ago

    Gemma, this is such a beautiful photo. You look gorgeous sitting on the deck contemplating the view in front of you. I’m sorry you had a personal loss in 2024, but you are about to turn the page on this year and have the best year of your life. I can just feel it happening for you with your beautiful comments on this photo.

    Janet Jorgenson
    Duchess
    Trusted Member
    3 months ago

    Thank you for sharing, Gemma. I hope you have a better 2025 and can find more joy. I don’t know you but you sound very kind, thoughtful, and caring. Be kind to yourself!

    Fiona Black
    Baroness
    Noble Member
    3 months ago

    All the best Gemma. I hope 2025 is a better year for you.

    Michelle Wayne
    Duchess
    Famed Member
    3 months ago

    So good to see another photo of you Gemma. I am sorry for your loss. Please love on the lady in the mirror and I hope you will be at peace in all you do.

    Fran LaRosa
    Ambassador
    Famed Member
    3 months ago

    Gemma, I pray all is well with you and that despite personal loss and setbacks. That you’re future is sunny and bright 🌞 wishing you and yours all the best! 🥰

    Roberta Broussard
    Duchess
    Famed Member
    3 months ago

    Good for you girl. It gets easier every time.

    Sophia Taylor
    Duchess
    Famed Member
    3 months ago

    Gemma, that is a beautiful photo and great pose! Here’s to a wonderful 2025.

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