My wife and I have been married for 30 years. The 1st year, I kept my panties and nighties hidden away. Then I decided to add ”Her” panties to bed one night. Low and behold she was amazed at how ”excited” I was and how long I remained in that state. That was how I broke the ice. Over the next 28 years, more and more items were added to bedtime. She has never been fond of it but tolerated it. It wasn’t until Halloween 2020 that I fully dressed up with the help of her best friend (whom she had discussed my ”Hobby” with unknown to me). There was hair removal, A LOT of that (I’m a hairy beast). There were stockings, garters, breast forms, wig and make up. There was an excessive amount of liquid courage consumed in order to get me to walk out of that door. But I did it, and it was life changing!

My Wife thought that if I dressed and went out in public one time that would be the end of it. Boy was this one hell of a shock to the both of us. I just can’t describe the rush I felt when we were inside the elevator, walked through the lobby and then arrived at the hotel bar. I was checked out by a guy, and not checked out as in “That’s a Dude in a Dress!” But as in that’s a hot chick. I was also got “Yikes! That’s a Dude in a dress”, so that’s how I knew the difference in the look. Of course I know the what checking-out look is (I’m a guy after all). Not that I wanted to be hit on, but being checked-out meant I had achieved the Holy Grail. I was passable for that one moment.

Now putting all other things aside; I for once had an idea of what it must feel like to be a woman. For one it’s a pain in the butt! It takes a lot of time and work. Second, I always thought when I was checking-out a hot chick that she liked it. Now I know that’s not the case. It’s actually a little scary (I didn’t want to get mauled outside the restroom). I didn’t use the restroom, but that’s where my mind went. Heels hurt after two hours. Fully dressed up, there really is no sexual excitement since everything is tucked, strapped and taped in place. Glue on nails (you use super glue) and make up removal is scary. Why? Well, hell, I didn’t know if it was ALL going to come off. In the end everything came off, and I was back to being Jim.

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The thing is, I’m a different Jim than I was before. This Jim doesn’t want to judge people anymore. Now I don’t care if you’re Straight, Gay or whatever. Now I’m not looking at that six-foot-plus tall woman and wondering if she’s a crossdresser like me but brave enough to be out and about.

Now I’m just confused as to why there is so little sexual excitement from dressing like there was in the past. Now when I dress, I want to sit in my chair and drink a glass wine as this profound calm and peace wash over me. This is the part I do not understand the most. Why? Why does it feel this way now? I’m going to accept this and try to find a way to enjoy it and to make it part of my life.

I guess my bottom line is you not only need to, you must, tell your wife/SO about your thrill of cross dressing. Without doing so you are keeping a part of you in hiding and keeping a secret from the only person more important than yourself. Will it be easy to do? No, it won’t. Will it be scary? Yes, yes it will. Will it make things better or worse? I just don’t know. What I do know is that the guilt of hiding it from your wife/SO will go away, and you’ll be able to say something like, “Honey I’m going to lock the bedroom door and spend an hour or two as Jamie.”
It’s worked for us so far.

En Femme Discover Woman Within

Thanks for taking the time to read my article girls! Now if you would like to comment on the article or respond to one or more of the questions I’ve posed to you below, feel free to do so!

  • Have you told your wife about your thrill of cross dressing yet or are you still deep in that secret cross dressing closet?
  • Have you ever been out in public in total girl mode and have been checked out by an amiring guy and if you have, how did you feel about being checked out by a guy or several guys?
  • What are some of the limitations your wife or SO places on your thrill of cross dressing?

Thank you all for your time and responses! Sincerely, Jamie!

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    Jamie Kane

    I'm just a guy who enjoys dressing up. I love Military history and collected Quite a few WWII items. I've been married for over 30 years and have an adult son. I've worked on Aircraft in the Navy and was a Cable TV Technician. Yes, that included climbing Telephone poles. I currently work at a local college. I'm a Veteran and I love computer games, not consoles ( I just can't use the controller).

    Latest posts by Jamie Kane (see all)

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    Tina CD123
    8 months ago

    I came out to my wife 2 weeks ago, so it’s still early days but I have been so much happier in myself. She understands why I need to dress as Tina but is finding it difficult to come to terms with the dual personality, as in her mind she has been married for 30 plus years to a regular guy. I spent years as a ‘knicker wearer’ and usually finding myself aroused by wearing sexy underwear but it runs much deeper than that. There has always been a part of me that has never been truly happy. Since coming… Read more »

    Patricia Marie Allen
    Active Member
    8 months ago

    You asked: “Have you told your wife about your thrill of cross dressing yet or are you still deep in that secret cross dressing closet?” My wife caught me five years into our marriage. Not the best way for your wife to find out about you. That was the beginning of a decade of a rocky marriage. But we survived. Thankfully, I wasn’t stupid enough to promise to never do it again. I thought when I got married, I’d just leave it by the wayside… NOT!. So I knew it was to be part of my life, always. She told… Read more »

    T.J. Byron
    Trusted Member
    7 months ago

    Jamie K.
    Very much enjoyed your story….I have been out in public since the 1960’s ,in my 20’s.
    My wife, sweetheart that she is, has given Formal Tea for my girlfriends AND their Wives!
    We are starting a new business,”The ARTof CDing”. A 2-3 day course on going out in public, looking good.
    What’s your thoughts?
    Look forward hearing from you Love…
    Dr. T.J.

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