Voice of the divine feminine

I love spending a day as a woman out in the world. There’s nothing quite as liberating and uplifting as when I look out with the eyes of the woman inside and dare for a few hours to live the life I long for. When I’m truly in my feminine zone it’s as if the shafts of sunlight themselves are signing a chorus of beautiful music just for me to hear. It’s those same soprano voices that quickly dissipate when I open my mouth to speak, unleashing a discordant clang of the deep unwelcome stranger within. Needless to say this can be quite jarring to the unsuspecting person I’m talking to, and many a time I’ve seen a flighting look of perplexed surprise dance across the face of my conversation companion.

It’s with a longing for the beautiful music of my femininity to continue that I have spent (and am yet to spend) countless hours practicing my feminine voice. For the last few months I’ve been following the Voice Feminization training program created by Kathy Perez. I must admit that all the pitch and resonance practice seems to be paying some small dividends, though I realize the path to a ‘passable female voice’ is still yet long and arduous. I’m learning slowly to not to hesitate before I speak, and not to hold back because I’m afraid my voice will out me.

What do you do to sound more feminine? Are there specific exercises you practice, techniques you use or training courses you’ve taken to hone your transgender voice?

[poll id=”27"]

It’s Official – Crossdressers Sit To Pee

In the last crossdressing poll I asked how many crossdressers sit to pee. I was surprised at the overwhelming number of crossdressers who sit to pee at least some of the time. 95% of you lovely ladies share in one of the more inconvenient necessities of life as a woman. It makes me proud that so many of you are willing to sit for a while in their shoes.

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Dedicated to creating a safe, supportive and welcoming environment for everyone in the transgender community.

Latest posts by Vanessa Law (see all)

  1. Stella De Laluz 6 months ago

    Oh good grief! Typo: I meant “female” voice.

  2. Stella De Laluz 6 months ago

    It would be great to have a “female” that would is a guaranteed pass, but I feel there’s much more to it. I’ve been thinking about this lately as I often have been drawn to women with deeper voices as much, if not more than to others. I think perhaps one of the most important aspects of presentation is spirit. At a recent shoot in my studio, I had a client who was having a lot of fun going through my wardrobe and later in the session she pulled out one of my full length gowns and then put on my full length tulle skirt over it. She came out on to the set and I looked at her and joyously exclaimed: “Look at you! An absolute princess!” In hindsight I feel I expressed myself in a very feminine fashion and it is the epitome of how I hope I can be as often as possible. To me the true feminine voice is that of optimism, that of unfiltered expression, that of fearless expressions of love to all.

  3. Veronica Raines 8 months ago

    I’ve been told many times, that I sound like girl, but since I lost most of my hearing, I have no idea, what I sound like. So, how to I train my voice, to sound girlish?

  4. Martha Lou 1 year ago

    I have a somewhat high voice to begin with.

    I have been mistaken as a woman when on the phone or sometimes when someone is not looking at me.

    My voice as a woman is developing very well.

    I make a very attractive woman when dressed so I want to sound like a woman.

  5. Zoée 1 year ago

    Well, I can do something feminine but I sound like a 14 years old girl or like Lucy in Twin Peaks! hahaha
    well I do think that this is better than nothing 🙂

  6. juliyasanchus 2 years ago

    I am also tried

  7. Sherry 7 years ago

    I enjoy practicing my voice with CDs from Kathe Perez.

  8. Stepheniemace 7 years ago

    Hi everyone

    I tried to become a male singer since I was about ten. Even made a few albums [went no where LOL]. So my biggest problem was resonance and how to lose it. I am fifty now so after almost forty years of trying to GET resonance it was extremely difficult to remove it for me.
    My one advantage was that I knew where to hold my throat, tongue etc to get certain sounds. After about 18 months I now sound feminine enough to no longer get a sir on the phone. Soon I hope to get a Ma’am. 🙂

    I follow the section on Voice Tutorials on my own website.
    Hopefully it can be of some help to others as well. 🙂
    The video by Sarah Jones I found most helpful after watching it about the third time. I guess I am slow, but I think it was because it was so simple I missed it. 🙂

    Enjoy and hope you get it soon as well. 🙂

    Stephenie 🙂

  9. Stephenie 8 years ago

    I follow the written stuff on my website as well as the video tutorials there. I found that what Sarah Jones had to say was probably the most profound in its simplicity. I also enjoyed Candifla of course. The thing that ‘did it’ for me was learning how to raise my voice box and get rid of the resonance. I had a lot and it changed my whole voice sound and I am ‘almost’ there in terms of a feminine voice. I not longer get a ‘sir’ on the phone. Not yet a madam but no longer a sir anyhow. 🙂 Hope that helps 🙂

  10. Nadia 8 years ago

    I've recentally been cast as the crossdresser Angel in a college production of the musical Rent, which is fantastic seeing as I've been crossdressing since I was 14…The director has no idea though. 😉 Anyway I've been trying desperately to work on my feminine voice and singing and I've tried to find a free download of one of those femine voice training progams because there's no way for me to pay for one…I can't find one anywhere.

    I'm 16 and I've always had this problem with money (i.e. having none), I've never been able to buy any facial products or clothes and it drives me mad…my skin is really suffering. I've been using my mum's when she's not around…she noticed that it was going missing though which was a bit awkward. Is there any help on this website for people with no money at all? I'm lost…

  11. Carol 8 years ago

    As a former public speaker, now as Carol Ann, I keep my mouth SHUT unless necessary. I pass really well, and the only “give away” is my deep voice, which I use softly so as to not attract attention. Even if noticed, I keep a smile, and find people really want to like you, so I do just fine.

  12. Leslee 8 years ago

    Ive dressed many times and talk constantly to other tgirls when Im dressed and my voice has changed . I recently heard my voice on my recorder at home and I hardly recognized my own voice pattern. This is when Im not dressed. it has become much more feminine. I always had a higher voice to start and I sing very high pitched also so the change was not noticeable to me until I heard my new voice and my friend said that I talk much different than I did a few years ago. Its a slow process and practice does help greatly

  13. rogina garter 8 years ago

    My “soccer mom” lookalike presentation is acceptable however my voice is a disaster! So,I only speak when spoken to when amongst mainstream people.Sure,I can use all the “sweet” expressions,but they are only words as the tone isn’t right…So,like many of us,I have a thick skin and accept that I don’t sound feminine.I have fun with all the rest of being out and about anywhere,as Rogina.

    • Vanessa Law 8 years ago

      🙂 Don’t give up Rogina – but I like your attitude of having fun despite it all!

  14. Racquel Lynn 8 years ago

    I answered ” I don’t try to change my voice” which is pretty much true, but I do change it slightly, but not as anything you describe in the options for answers.
    I may talk a little softer sometimes, but I never try to talk falseto or melodic, etc.
    In listening to other transgendered women I have realized that the voice is often like make-up, clothing, etc. How many times have you seen someone over do it with their outfit and/or their make-up trying too hard to be passable and the results being that they look even more like a man trying to look like a woman, when if they didn’t try as hard they would look more like a woman. Many will try to overcompensate with their voice as well and they sound rediculous or come off sounding like a flaming queen. (nothing wrong with that if that is what you are going for)
    Quite simply, the rule “Less is more” very often should be the rule in most aspects of crossdressing to pass. Sometimes we do have to put more into some things than our genetically born counterparts. I tend to be a little heavy on foundation when putting on make-up around the area where the 5 o’cock shadow may try to appear later, but I try not to go too heavy on the rest of my make-up, especially ete shadow. Sometimes I even like to be very light on make-up and go for a more natural look, but when I do wear a bit more color, I try not to look like a drag queen with the usually heavier and more theatrical look, which looks great on stage under lights for a show, but often is not a realistic look close up and face to face with someone.
    Same thing with your voice, if you overdo it with your voice, it can actually go against you more than if you talked in your normal male voice.
    I may talk a little softer and lighter, but I don’t try to talk too softly.
    I actually had a really good voice going when I was transitioning to living full time as female years ago (which got put off, but I am now working on full time transition again) Then I started working in a bar, where I sometimes had to play bouncer and had to have a more authoritative voice to keep order, which, after a few years of that, put a huge damper on my feminine voice, which I am just now finally starting to get back.
    Another thing that makes it a bit difficult for me, is that I am a musician and a singer. I love a lot of old 80’s music, especially hairbands and heavy metal, so I use a heavy voice to sing a lot of songs, but at the same time I also sing a lot of stuff like Journey, Boston and other things with powerful high notes, but very melodic and smooth, so it kind of balances me out. I can actually sound more feminine when I sing than when I talk. I can sing Lita Ford or Heart and a few others and sound just like them and have people taking double takes when I am dressed as a male on stage.
    As with all other aspects of crossdressing and passing, one of the major keys with your voice is confidence. It’s good to practice your voice, but if you get in front of a stranger and you get nervous and lose your confidence, then any passability you may have had goes right out the window, just as when you may look wonderful and physically be 100% passable, if you are not confident with yourself, then you will likely give yourself away.
    And again, don’t overdo it.
    I think the best practice is listening to yourself and just try to speak normal, but slowly start making small subtle changes and not change too much at once. A little bit of a change here and there works much better and starts to feel and sound more natural. Then just start talking with your friends who know and support you. If you change your voice too much all at once, it will be harder to know what works and what doesn’t and harder to figure out what to correct. If you make small subtle changes as you go, you learn what works and what doesn’t work and your voice slowly starts becoming more convincingly feminine.
    I am like Stace though, I have always been called “Ma’am” or “miss” on the telephone even when I wasn’t trying to talk as a female. That always makes me feel good! 😉
    I have always had long hair, so in public, even when I wasn’t dressed female, people would sometimes think I was a female for a moment, like when I would be standing in line at a store and a cashier in another check out would say “Ma’am I can take you over here” and I turn around to walk over and they have that “Oh S#@t look on their face and put their hand over their mouth and say “Oh, I am so sorry, I thought you were a girl!” and I always tell them tell them not to feel bad because I take it as a compliment. lol
    Passing is important to me, and I know my voice can often be the downfall, but I think I hurt myself when I try too hard to sound feminine, but when I just relax and not try so hard and not conentrate too much and just be more natural, but with a “feminine feel” rather than just trying hard to sound like a girl, then I usually do much better.

    • Vanessa Law 8 years ago

      Great advice – confidence is a key in so much of passing. Though I’m a bit envious of your and Stace’s ability to pass vocally 😉

  15. Stace 8 years ago

    Hmm, difficult one to answer in your poll (I may have skewed your results).

    I don’t try to change my voice – but the reason for that is that I have a borderline voice at the best of times (in fact on the phone unless someone has my details I get called Mrs more than Mr, and efen with the details I get an amount of ‘Are you the partner of Mr. X?’)

    This used to be really embarissing when I answered the phone at my ex’s house only to be mistaken for her mum on the phone 95% of the time.


  16. Vanessa Law 8 years ago

    Jessica, how far into Andrea’s program are you? Have you seen good results yet?

    I’ve been practicing off and on for a few months, and I’ve seen some results, but I wonder whether I need to work one on one with someone so they can correct mistakes I’m making. There’s only so much you can tell by listening to your own voice and using frequency tuners.

  17. Jessica Sideways 8 years ago

    I’m currently using the Finding Your Female Voice programme by Andrea James. However, I intend to see Kathy Perez for voice lessons if that does not seem to work. That should be pretty simple as she is just down in Denver.

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