Having been here for six and a half years now, I’ve borne witness to seeing our site grow tremendously, as well as the addition of many features. Some are mainly involved only in the forums, others in groups, and still others in chat. We each receive and give different things at different times in our journey. I joined before chat even existed on CDH, and I wrote many forum posts and articles when many, if not most of our current active members hadn’t yet joined—this place we (or at least I) simply call “home.!” When chat DID begin, it was a lifeboat for those of us adrift on a sea of uncertainty, those of us who felt alone in the world. I cannot emphasize enough the difference this place and you folks have made in my life and in my journey of discovery. I previously wrote the poem below, almost exactly six years ago, and recently shared it with some folks in chat, including Billiejay. She requested I repost it as an article. I hope it means something to some newer folks—I know it does for me.

The day had started gloomy in the early early morn-
It matched the mood inside my head –my mind was truly torn.
Did I truly know what path to take-and how was I to know
As looking in the mirror, all my wrinkles start to show!

There are days when I feel perfect-where I’m pretty and petite!
On others I’m an ogre with gray hair and monstrous feet.
Today I feel so horrible-and fear I’ve lost my way.
I stare and think of all the things that she would have me say.

A rough and male exterior is all that I can see!
The girl I feel indwells my soul is faint as she can be.
Her voice-as quiet as a mouse-says “Don’t forget I’m here!”
But doubt and worry flood my mind-my heart is filled with fear.

Dare I believe that I could ever be the girl inside?
So many years behind the shell, her soul’s been forced to hide.
Too many times denied the chance to stretch her wings and fly
Could there be any hope left or is she simply going to die?

But just as she resigns herself to years of lonely gloom,
She finds herself online and strays inside a lively room!
Amazed she stares upon her screen-this surely can’t be true!
A dozen girls are chatting and her wonder grew and grew.

And as she listened to them talk she thought “I’m NOT alone!”
She felt more joy and happiness than she had ever known !
“These girls are just like me” she thought and then one turned and said,
“So glad you joined our chat today!” and then she looked ahead.

The fears that had tormented her were suddenly abated
While hope that had seemed dead and gone she found was reinstated.
The power of friendship can’t be measured easily it’s true-
But if it’s offered freely there’s so much that it can do!

So when you’re feeling lonely or just need a friendly ear-
You’ll find support and loving friends each time you come by here.
‘Cause CDH is where you go-it’s certainly all that!
WE hope that you’ll come join us soon in this- our evening CHAT!

EnFemme

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skippy1965 Cynthia

The Original Cyn, or OC for short. Cynthia is from Richmond Virginia, she crossdresses every day (lucky gal!) and has a knack for tracking down niggling technical issues so we can fix them. She is also on a journey of self-examination to figure out where her feminine journey will lead her, and is always willing to talk with others about their feelings and questions or her own. Update January 2023- the above was written by Vanessa on my behalf back when I joined in 2015. So much has happened on my journey since then. From a shy CD who had hardly been outside as herself to being pretty much full time Cyn 24/7 now. I told work about me and started HRT last year. Everyone knows about me in my life now too. I've socially transitioned for the most part but not sure if I will do anything regarding legal name or any surgeries at all. It's taken mea long time to accept myself for who I am but the site has helped me reach that level of self-awareness. I say dating below but that's just the best status I can say. I have a friend who is very special to me that I HOPE will be more a life companion as time goes forward.

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Leonara
Ambassador
Trusted Member
2 years ago

hi Cynthia, I may be the first to comment and I know not the last..thank you for your forum on the chat room.. I too enjoy our exchanges on chat room as well as all the ladies who participate, for me, on any night.
be well hugs, Leonara

Missy
Lady
Member
2 years ago

Miss Cynthia, I love your poam! Tonight is the first time I have seen it. I’ve been a very poor member since I joined. We never know what life is going throw at us. If I had the time to write my story from the time I landed in the Bible belt in 09 to when I joined CDH 15 would be a book in it’s self! Then the way time goes faster by the day the older we get I could write two more book’s from 15 to now. Life hasn’t gave me time to write yet! I believe… Read more »

Shawna Carlena
Member
Shawna Carlena
2 years ago

I love that poem Thank-you
Line Six describes a situation
that I try to overcome by
realizing I’m the same
I was yesterday
and nothing
has changed.
Sometimes
I feel that I am
wrong for the site
Because I don’t feel
a big struggle like everyone
seems to.. Maybe I will.. Ciao.!

Shawna.

ps. yer pics are Great!

Gwyneth
Lady
Active Member
2 years ago

You are spot on. It’s been several months since I’ve been in the chat. I feel like I’m missing so much, as confusing as the chat can get. Many conversations going on.

Gwyn

Stephanie Flowers
Ambassador
Active Member
2 years ago

I remember your poem when first arriving he years ago and it certainly motivated me in pursuing my dream and making me decide to stay. Many have been inspired by your wonderful words with your dedication in helping all that passes through their life’s paths. Always a joy when your here.
Hugs Stephanie..

Stephanie Bass
Member
Active Member
2 years ago

Hy Cynthia a wonderful poem with all the right scenerios of our life perfectly posted thank you girlfriend..
Stephanie Been scared to chat there ?? just me look at it some times some day will join in hugs girls..

Dawn Judson
Ambassador
Active Member
2 years ago

Beautiful– in so many ways!

Robin Snow
Duchess
Active Member
2 years ago

Hi Cynthia,

Well said. I certainly enjoy the conversations in the chat room. It’s so much fun and I have met (virtually) so many wonderful ladies there.

Cheers,
Robin

Autumn Valiant
Duchess
Active Member
1 year ago

Thank you for being inspirational you
Hugs and Love

Barbra Heaps
Member
Active Member
3 months ago

Cynthia what a beautiful poem it brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing

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