When all your transgender dreams come true

Dear Ladies,

When I logged in this morning I was a little shocked to see that it has been more than a year since I last spoke with you. I must admit that I’ve missed sharing my journey, I’ve missed hearing about your triumphs, helping you through your occasional struggles, but most of all missed the community that we share here online.

We work in different jobs, live in different places and may even speak different languages, but one thing bonds us together. We share a longing to understand and express who we are – to let our light shine that has been hiding under drab rags for too long. No matter where you are on your journey, you are welcome here. This is a safe place to learn, ask questions and discover your true self.

Transgender Heaven - Gender Journey

Dreams can come true!

It seems like forever ago that I transitioned, yet just a moment ago when that would have seemed impossible. My deepest sorrow and hardest struggle is over, what was once my wildest dream is now an ordinary every day. I live, and work, and love as who I am all the time. As a woman. Through the twists and turns of life I can now count but a few people I still keep in contact with who knew anything else.

For many of you reading I know that living as a woman sounds like the most amazing, wonderful, exciting and joyous thing you can imagine – it was for me for many years. Yet when dreams come true I found that I went to bed and woke up the next day just the same.

Transgender dreams

Life gives you new dreams

Now my life is normal in most respects – I have a job I occasionally grumble about, I worry that I’m getting fat then eat that slice of cheesecake anyway, I make mistakes, get upset and keep trying to keep going. The only difference is I no longer worry about my gender. It doesn’t really cross my mind, except on those occasional moments when I pine for the gift of motherhood. Even in that pining I can’t help but realize how blessed I still am.

Whether your most wonderful dream has come true, or you’re still wishing on a star I’m here to hold your hand and let you know that it is possible. Have you never been out en femme before? That is a huge step, and a dream for many, but you can make it happen! Are you afraid of sharing your true self with loved ones? Acceptance and love from them may be a dream still in your future.

What do you dream about? What is that step on your transgender journey that you’ve not yet taken that becons to you? Take a moment and share your thoughts below, I’d love to hear from you!

Hugs,
Your friend, Vanessa

This post first appeared on Crossdresser Heaven.

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20 Comments
  1. jenniferlynroberts 5 years ago

    well I still cross dress ass a woman in my apt and yes some of my love ones and some of my friends still thik that it is wrong for me to dress as a woman but when I dress as a woman I begain to fee and think and become my true selfe and I have even begian to think and feel that I am a woman

    • Author
      Vanessa Law 5 years ago

      Oh Jennifer what a wonderful blessing to even express yourself that far! Don’t give up dear, when they see you shine they will appreciate your love and your beauty. *Hugs*

      • jennifer lynn roberts 5 years ago

        thank you VANESSA just reading your reply makes me feel more like a woman and makes me feel that I can take on the world as a woman and I really would like to be your friend and maybe some day we can meet and have some fun shopping for woman’s clothes and things

      • jennifer lynn roberts 4 years ago

        well sisters this JENNIFER LYNN and I just want to say that I have a few FACE BOOK friends that I have told then that I cross dress as a woman and some of them are ok with that and one of them has started to call me her sister and girlfriend and we are trying to plan a girls day out and she has even invite me to her wedding and I am going to be in it as a brides maid

    • Samantha 5 years ago

      Hi Vanessa, so nice to have you back, and share your thoughts, they are very encouraging, and inspiring. Like you Jennifer, I also mostly dress in my apartment, yet I am becoming more, and more bolder doing things out in public, like nail polish, and clothes underneath at work, and while I don’t have many friends who know, online support like this helps. We all go on our journey at our own pace, and how much we want to change is up to us, but having that option of being able to be someone different, more beautiful, and feminine is a great gift. Someday I’ll have that opportunity to go out dressed, as I hope you do too Jennifer!

      • Author
        Vanessa Law 5 years ago

        Hi Samantha, thanks for the welcome dear – it’s good to be back 🙂
        Baby steps – good for you love! Each step creates more confidence, I know that you’ll soon be walking around as if you own the place, and letting your fabulous self light up the room!

    • lucinda 5 years ago

      i feel the same way, my wife lets me dress up when no one is home, but will not help me with make up or see me dressed up. but she will sneak down stairs to check up on me if i am dressed up or not. i feel more myself as a female. its like a switch, dress up as a female male mode gets turned off. just wish i could share me femininity side with my wife and talk like 2 females and talk about how i feel dressed up, why, what for. i have all the answers for them

      • Joann 4 years ago

        Lucinda hi I am Joann my wife also knows but dos not want to see me dresser we should get together for some girl time together

  2. geni47 5 years ago

    Last night, I went out as Genivieve. I met a group of other T-girls at a club and just sat and talked. I have struggled my whole life with the female part of my being and am realizing that there is nothing wrong or perverted about me. I’m simply a person who has male and female characteritics. I loved being able to express my femininity outside of my home! I will do this again!

    • Author
      Vanessa Law 5 years ago

      Well said Geni! There is nothing wrong with who you are!
      You are beautiful, and lovely! I’m so glad you had the experience of going out with others en femme! It’s wonderfully freeing.

  3. debra 5 years ago

    I just wish that it wouldn’t be considered as crossdressing it’s just clothes and anyone should dress the way they want and makes them feel good the world would be a happier place just be happy

  4. Kathleen Martin 5 years ago

    Hello Vanessa;
    I have been following your journey from the time before you transitioned. Then I was only a part time crossdresser and considered myself only a crossdresser. But as I spent more time enfem after the loss of a loved one, I realized this was the real me. I began to hate the moment when the clothes, accessories and makeup came off. Then I found a support group online in the same situation and finally had people to talk to. Since then I have gone full time and began my own transition and never looked back. Family and friends are slowly coming around.
    Your strong will, determination and acceptance of your own self-awareness have always been an inspiration to me and I thank you..

    • Author
      Vanessa Law 5 years ago

      Kathleen, I’m sorry for your loss, but am heartened to hear you embracing your true self. It’s a journey that you’ve been on for a long time. Hugs and best wishes dear!

  5. Daphne Brynne 5 years ago

    If I had my life to do over I would transition in a heartbeat. But I tried living the lie and have regretted it most everyday. I have nothing but praise and adoration for those who have transitioned. My only solace in this wrong body comes from the fact I am also a lesbian inside. So my marriage allows me to indulge those feelings without reciprocation although.

    • Author
      Vanessa Law 5 years ago

      Hi Daphne,
      Don’t be too hard on yourself for your past choices, we all do what is best for us at the time, given the constraints and abilities available. Rejoice in who you are, and how far you’ve been able to come so far.

  6. Rachel 5 years ago

    Hello Vanessa it’s so nice to have you back. I thought you had forgotten all about us I hope you keep in contact with us more to share more of your experience as a beautiful woman IQ and becoming more in touch with my feminine side and those days that I want to transition but I’m not at that point yet hopefully someday I will be complete until then it’s encouraging to get your email and to find out how life is treating you your girlfriend Rachel

    PS don’t stay away so long !

    • Author
      Vanessa Law 5 years ago

      Hey Rachel – thanks 🙂 Life has been crazy, but it’s good to be back! *hugs*
      Keep walking your path hon, I know that you will find what is right for you!

  7. carryli servina 5 years ago

    While I spend as much time as possible fully dressed. And bi-sexual. I have the upmost respect for those who transition fully. I have not had the feeling of being anymore then I am. I have gone in public dressed. I go shopping and have no problems asking if I can try on things. But even as I used to dress when not at work all the time the thought of transitioning has never entered my mind.

    Even though I am not looking to fully transition into a woman if I had the chance to stay dressed all the time I probably would.

  8. MERO 5 years ago

    First i want to thank you for that wonderful and supporting words, what you talked about is my ultimate dream in me life, to be a woman, i been crossdressing since i was 14, and am gay too, thing is , am now 37, and forced to marry to a female, that because am an arab whi lives in arab world which is a part or the world who don’t believe in any lgbt person or right’s, so had to live in secret, for all those lost years of my life, I tried to do HRT but I couldn’t find any medical cure or advice so I took it on my responsibility and end up in a hospital, and it was a big scandal for me when the hospital find out about it and told my family, for that I tend Suicide and failed for the second time in my life, the first time when I lost my beloved, any way, i just want to thank you for that dream you show me when I close my eyes after reading your article, its a wonderful dream,
    Thanks
    Yours: MERO

    • Author
      Vanessa Law 5 years ago

      Oh hon, thank you for writing in. I’m sorry to hear about your struggles – the world has a long way to go to accept us for who we are inside. I pray that the dream of a brighter and more feminine future can sustain you. You are welcome here, in this community.

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