Why do men cross dress?

Why do men crossdress?

Girl friends and wives want to know.

Why do men cross dress?

Why does my husband cross dress?

How can I make him stop cross dressing?

The unfortunate truth, is that there is no simple, one line answer to these questions. If there were, you probably wouldn’t be reading this article, and the debates on this topic would be silent.

In my personal experience, the fascination with woman’s clothes started when I was very young. I must have been about four years old, and I remember going to great lengths to procure and then wear my mom’s nightie. My most vivid memory is as a teenager, nervously buying a pair of pantyhose from a local supermarket and then wearing them home under my pants.

I felt (and still feel) a need to wear woman’s clothes, and I can’t quite explain where it comes from. The media like to think of cross dressing as a sexual perversion, and so naturally they see the desire to cross dress and purely for sexual gratification. The problem with this theory is that when I (and many others) first felt the desire to cross dress I didn’t know what sex was.

Many cross dressers I’ve asked describe the need as ‘feeling more comfortable wearing woman’s clothes’. This is sometimes (but not always) coupled with the desire to be seen as a woman. To not just dress like a woman, but behave like one as well, to wear make-up and otherwise pass as a woman. There are others who cross dress for sexual excitement. The need to cross dress is indeed a spectrum.

That still doesn’t answer the question why do men cross dress?

Marcy proposes a few interesting answers to this questions.

One argument is that transvestism of cross-dressing is a way of offering a challenge to society’s preconceptions about gender. Some men cross-dress because they are unhappy at being men. Others didn’t mind the male state, but also like to put on women’s clothes occasionally. Some men cross-dress simply to make a passing social or fashion statement, and some because they have emotional needs that can only be met by the comfort that wearing women’s clothes gives them.

Yet the true reason why men cross dress remains somewhat of a mystery. It is intensely personal, often confusing and sometimes guilt ridden. I’m hopeful that as society grows more tolerant of diverse gender expression we will see more cross dressers and transgendered stepping forward to share their stories. Without the need to justify their behavior, and no longer shamed by society perhaps we will be better able to answer this baffling question.

Comment and let me know, I would love to hear- why do you cross dress?

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937 Comments
  1. Profile photo of Rosaliy Lynne
    Rosaliy Lynne 2 days ago

    back in high school, as I have shared in various posts, it was something “I had to do.” Why? I did not know then but I believe it is something about my early development that left me in between, as it were. Growing up as a boy, I never really fit in any ‘peer groups’ and I did relate better with the girls. In one foster home I even played dolls with my foster sister. I had fun even with the paper cut out dolls and the clothes that just went on by bending the tabs over the doll body. As grew I found I was more intuitive than a ‘boy’ should be. I thought differently too never really getting into all the boy thoughts and activities. Oh, I tried to fit in with the boys but that never worked.

    Understanding why we cross dress is as easy as understanding women from a man’s perspective.

    How can we be stopped from cross dressing? In my experience that is a ‘not going to happen’ thing. I, myself, frequently put it aside up through my several marriages, sometimes for a year or more, but it always came back.

    Now I am this woman and am very happy and balanced.

  2. Profile photo of Sallysim
    Sallysim 2 days ago

    Simple really, I Crossdress because I feel happier and more myself as a woman. I feel it’s the real me. I love going out in public en femme, and being a man is just plain boring.

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