Girl friends and wives want to know.
Why do men cross dress?
Why does my husband cross dress?
How can I make him stop cross dressing?
The unfortunate truth, is that there is no simple, one line answer to these questions. If there were, you probably wouldn’t be reading this article, and the debates on this topic would be silent.
In my personal experience, the fascination with woman’s clothes started when I was very young. I must have been about four years old, and I remember going to great lengths to procure and then wear my mom’s nightie. My most vivid memory is as a teenager, nervously buying a pair of pantyhose from a local supermarket and then wearing them home under my pants.
I felt (and still feel) a need to wear woman’s clothes, and I can’t quite explain where it comes from. The media like to think of cross dressing as a sexual perversion, and so naturally they see the desire to cross dress and purely for sexual gratification. The problem with this theory is that when I (and many others) first felt the desire to cross dress I didn’t know what sex was.
Many cross dressers I’ve asked describe the need as ‘feeling more comfortable wearing woman’s clothes’. This is sometimes (but not always) coupled with the desire to be seen as a woman. To not just dress like a woman, but behave like one as well, to wear make-up and otherwise pass as a woman. There are others who cross dress for sexual excitement. The need to cross dress is indeed a spectrum.
That still doesn’t answer the question why do men cross dress?
Marcy proposes a few interesting answers to this questions.
One argument is that transvestism of cross-dressing is a way of offering a challenge to society’s preconceptions about gender. Some men cross-dress because they are unhappy at being men. Others didn’t mind the male state, but also like to put on women’s clothes occasionally. Some men cross-dress simply to make a passing social or fashion statement, and some because they have emotional needs that can only be met by the comfort that wearing women’s clothes gives them.
Yet the true reason why men cross dress remains somewhat of a mystery. It is intensely personal, often confusing and sometimes guilt ridden. I’m hopeful that as society grows more tolerant of diverse gender expression we will see more cross dressers and transgendered stepping forward to share their stories. Without the need to justify their behavior, and no longer shamed by society perhaps we will be better able to answer this baffling question.
Comment and let me know, I would love to hear- why do you cross dress?
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Why do we dress just makes me feel good
My first crossdressing experience was when I was 7. I had a day off of school and I had inherited my sisters wardrobe, all of my boy cloths had replaced hers as she had left to be with her boyfriend, but 1 draw had one of her swiming costumes. As of course curiosity got the better of me and i decided to put it on. it was ok a bit snug in places and loose in other (as we all know eh girls)! Then what should happen.. yep my father walks in and asks what i wanted for lunch! shock,… Read more »
Simple really, I Crossdress because I feel happier and more myself as a woman. I feel it’s the real me. I love going out in public en femme, and being a man is just plain boring.
back in high school, as I have shared in various posts, it was something “I had to do." Why? I did not know then but I believe it is something about my early development that left me in between, as it were. Growing up as a boy, I never really fit in any ‘peer groups’ and I did relate better with the girls. In one foster home I even played dolls with my foster sister. I had fun even with the paper cut out dolls and the clothes that just went on by bending the tabs over the doll body.… Read more »
it is a compulsion that has gotten hold of me since i was 13 years old
It simply is part of who I am. My urge to slip on Mother’s silky nylon panties came naturally as a young teenager and from deep within me…..
I like the feel of women under clothing because it makes me feel sexy.I wear pantys and bra when ever I can under clothing I get some looks but that makes me feel good thinking someone know what I have on.
Hello I know it’s been a minute on your posts but like to publicly say I’m a married closeted crossdresser except to my wife. I too like many started very young I know I was five raised with Three sisters and a mom I was only boy I couldn’t wait for sis. To leave there room so u could snag pair of pantyhose and it was the 80 s women everywhere wore them with mini skirts I never knew why I had that earge to wear that stuff but did always at first thought fetish but older I got wasn’t… Read more »
Hi there
Yes thanks for the article! I am a crossdresser and have now accepted my femme alter ego as part of me! It’s definitely a sexual turn in seeing myself as Maria, my sexy alter ego because you are the woman you desire! Ihave always had a fascination for female clothes and it feels right when I am fully dressed up! Been crossdressing since around 1992
Hi Maria! I started with my mother’s stockings around age 12. I’ve purged many, many times to no avail. We all seem to have basically the same story. I feel complete when the clothes are on. I’m over being angry anymore. The only cure is acceptance. I finally enjoy being Jennifer. Don’t fight it! Just embrace.
I can’t really say I can relate or understand the urge to do this, but I do understand the need to be who we are. If this is what makes you feel like your true authentic self, more power to you. I’ve heard, to your own self be true… Best wishes to you all.
Thank you Cheryl! It’s who I am. Fighting it only brings on anxiety and depression. My life runs much smoother accepting the girl inside.