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Allison Finch

It is not short but here it is – it’s the closest I could get to the “Reader’s Digest” Condensed version. I recommend getting a drink before reading. I had been dressing in secret since I was about 7 yrs old. I was 22 when I took a job traveling the state of Georgia. I always took my "special suitcase" with all my girl clothes in it. I had time at night in the hotels to dress but I never went out in public. I changed jobs at 24 and then travelled all of the southeastern USA staying about 125 nights a year in a hotel. I had great time, loved the job and was good at it. I was the district sales manager and made great money. I got married and divorced after 10 years. She never had a clue about Allison. When I was 35, one of my best friends died of a heart attack in my living room as I was giving him CPR. Talk about turning my world upside down! It brought to light the fact that life is really very short; happiness is a priority; really live life and don’t let it just pass you by. Every second matters. I always had a passion for cross dressing but had never lived my dream. I found a place in town that could teach me all I needed to know about dressing, makeup and even wigs. So at 35, Allison began to go out in public. That was when real fun began and I was hooked. I had been dating a girl all this time and we got married. Sneaking around to go out was not that easy but after a lifetime of sneaking I was good at it. One Christmas my wife and I went to NYC to visit my sister who lived there. The rest of the family visited as well. Our time there was ruined because my wife was a bitch the whole time. Her behavior was so bad we cut the visit short by 3 days and came home. After our flight landed and we arrived home, I asked her, " What the fuck has been wrong with you the past week? You have been such a bitch!! " She just started crying, left the room and I grabbed a beer. She returns after a little while looking very serious and throws down on the table a bunch of photos of a girl and screams," Who is this SLUT you have been Fucking?!" ........... They were photos of Allison............. I needed another beer. I sat in silence and wondered how to explain to her the "Slut" in the photos was, in fact, me. She had found my stash of pictures in a secret compartment in my briefcase. I was truly busted. After 30 years, I had been caught doing this immoral; disgusting; perverted; sinful; unnatural thing that was my passion in life. I was afraid of what would happen to my life as I knew it. My wife could, at this point, bring a living hell down on me. I must answer carefully. It was 2 am and I started at the beginning when I was about 7. I told her the story that you are reading now explaining also the guilt and shame I’d had all my life - never knowing why I did this even after researching and taking in all I could read about the subject. How when Michael had died in my house, I came to realize cross dressing is part of who I am. I would not be complete without it. I dug out books I had hidden including," My Husband wears my Clothes" by Peggy Rudd. This book was one of the firs I owned on the subject. I also got out "Gender Outlaw", April Ashley's Odyssey, and many others. I explained that years ago I quit making myself crazy by asking, “Why?” There is no answer - really it is part of who you are. So I chose to embrace that facet of myself and be happy rather than fighting myself. I did away with the internal conflict that had tortured me all those years. After that, I believe I have become a more complete and complex individual by accepting and growing with that aspect of my soul. I think I now have a deeper and better understanding of my life as a whole. Plus, the simple fact that I was finally happy with myself. Of course there are the usual questions such as "Are you gay?" and "Do you want to be a woman?" By now it was 7:30am and the sun was coming up. I was worn out physically, emotionally, and mentally. We chose to get some sleep and talk more after some rest. When I got up she was looking at the photos again and said, "I don't believe you. This is not you." I assured her it was. “Then show me,” she says. The next week, I went to my friends place, got dressed and came home. She looks me up and down and says "I want my husband to look like a man not a woman."..... I was crushed. She really did try to understand and even went out with me over the next couple of years including SCC, a trans convention here in Atlanta. I knew her heart was not really into it. At least she tried to understand for me. She said she was never embarrassed because I could pass. Time took its toll on the marriage, and over other issues we divorced. She did not ever use my cross dressing against me or tell anyone - ever. For that I thank her. She has since passed away. Fate then brought an old friend back in my life. I had known Linda for 20 years and it’s another long, very long, story. I told Linda of my hobby and passion before we ever went out. All she said was, "Show me." Our first date I dressed for her and she had bought me some sexy high heels for me to wear that night. We had 17 years of such intense and passionate love and more fun than I could ever imagine possible. In January 2012 we were told that she had throat cancer. For 3 ½ years we battled for her life. The radiation she endured as a cure would end up killing her. But she was cancer free when she died. Well, here I am 4 years later, just coming to terms with what I have seen and done in life so far. I am constantly doing an intense evaluation down to my soul of who I really am. I am so different than I used to be. I believe I am finally closer to being in tune with the universe than I could ever dream. I now have the chance to start over in a way. I am semi-retired and making it. Nothing fancy - just comfortable. I don't know where I’m going but I sure know where the hell I’ve been. When the curtain falls I will have no regrets. I have lived a very full life. There is a saying that goes something like "If you’re not living on the edge, you’re just taking up space." I have always looked for the chance to step out of my comfort zone so I can really live life to the fullest. I look at my life as a study in human nature at times. If I were to write a book about my life, most people would call it fiction. My life experience tells me that fact really is stranger than fiction. "You can't just make this shit up" Allison

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Guest
Allyson Nicole

Adore your name you are very pretty. Awesome photo

Jamie Vegas
Duchess
Active Member

Feeling good and looking awesome!

Erica Cartman
Lady
Active Member

You got the look Babe! Hugs Erica

Reel Steel
Member

Hey you

Erica Cartman
Lady
Active Member

Hi You? What’s up?

Grace
Baroness
Active Member

And looking very good

Reel Steel
Member

2533765047

Donna James
Lady
Active Member

love the look!

Karen B
Duchess
Active Member

O M G !
Simply gorgeous!
You are a knockout!
Enjoy

gloria mundi
Lady

What a story ! You are so beautiful and deserve to be happy .

Bree Carrington
Guest
Member
Bree Carrington

Love your look! You are gorgeous!

Sarah Murphy
Lady
Member

A true babe

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