• This topic has 10 replies, 10 voices, and was last updated 9 months ago by Anonymous.
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  • #589497
    Marti
    Participant
    Registered On: February 5, 2019
    Topics: 62
    Replies: 957
    Has thanked: 4975 times
    Been thanked: 4525 times

    It’s been a funny old two weeks. I’m intentionally not posting much. But every cloud has a silver lining. I’ve had time for a bit of introspection, and for a couple of reasons, it won’t hurt me to leave the forums for a while, as from now. I’ll respond to PMs in the immediate future but no more posts.

    First, I’m grateful for a friendly PM, where a new member asked my advice, and told me that she was getting no traction when she posted a question , and that her post soon found its way to the badlands – i.e. page 2, 3, … And in answering that “these things happen”, I realised that I’d been contributing to this situation. I’ve been posting and answering far too often, crowding the board and crowding out newer members and others who have only a limited time to spend here. Sorry.

    Second, I came for the obvious reason, and have learnt a lot from you all. Still a work in progress but cdh has worked its wonders. . I’ve met some lovely and helpful women but right now I’m having a crisis of confidence sometimes as in ‘who’ I am actually interacting with here? So I’m backing off . Don’t worry, I won’t be going to a bad place. I’m lucky to have good friends in real life who now cope with a new me to varying degrees – so that’s fine.

    My annual membership renewal is coming up quite soon. I’m still unsure whether to keep a basic membership, so I can access the articles section and the responses. I’m concerned that would give me access to the forums and be too much temptation! But it might also be the easiest way of staying in touch with friends I might otherwise lose. We’ll see.

    All that’s left to say is thanks to all, and I wish you a happy future, full of love and acceptance.

    Marti xxx

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    • #590687
      Anonymous
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      Hi Marti

      Please don’t go

      Emily

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #590469
      Regine Kelly
      Lady
      Registered On: October 9, 2020
      Topics: 44
      Replies: 1451
      Has thanked: 20372 times
      Been thanked: 6882 times

      Marti, I am just reading your post, now, I hope it is not too late.
      Your replies and posts, are always thoughtful and supportive, and I hope you continue.
      I too have pulled back on replying ,or posting, but my reason was I caused someone pain, here, completely un=intentional, but caused, no less. I have felt terrible, ever since, but what is done is done. Does that make the majority of my replies/posts, any less supportive? I am still questioning, myself.
      As for overloading the boards, I have had many posts that just died upon writing. It is not because they got pushed to the “dead space”, but simply because not enough people were interested, in what I wrote. I am not offended, it is what it is, lol
      when I log in, I always go through 6 or 8 pages of recent posts, if they peak my interest, I read them, if not, pass.
      I hope you stay, my friend
      Hugs, Regi

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #589893
      Dee Nash
      Lady
      Registered On: November 7, 2021
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 253
      Has thanked: 1612 times
      Been thanked: 1058 times

      Hi marti will miss you if you go when I first came on this site you were so friendly and helpful i for one will miss you lady x

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #589885
      Michelle McQueen
      Lady
      Registered On: June 14, 2021
      Topics: 28
      Replies: 1532
      Has thanked: 10069 times
      Been thanked: 7543 times

      Hi Marti.

      It seems to be common among us girls to question ourselves along the way sometimes taking a step back then a step forward then maybe back again. We do this as we evolve with ourselves and its only natural especially given our unique lifestyle. I wish you the best what ever you decide.

      I’m probably one of those who crowd the forums with my rambling nonsense and I apologize if I offend anyone because its not meant that way. I enjoy reading and chatting away here because it makes me feel a part of something much bigger than I could ever wish for. I feel validated when other girls notice and respond about something and lets me know it helped them in some small way.

      No, like the others I don’t think you crowd the boards at all and I always loved reading your thoughtful posts. I hope you don’t leave but maybe take some time away but keep us in mind… I think this site will always be open… hope so.

      We have chatted in private messages and I hope I did not offend you or appeared too pushy with questions or just my statements. Hope to chat with you more in the future.

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #589704
      Barb Wire
      Duchess - Annual
      Registered On: September 16, 2021
      Topics: 17
      Replies: 704
      Has thanked: 4026 times
      Been thanked: 3323 times

      We hear and listen to you loud and clear, Marti!!

      Why would you want to lose so many ears??

      I too have “pulled back” because of my little meltdown last week. It’s easy to get overwhelmed by voices in pain and struggle. But we listen. We cry. We laugh. We heal!!

      Take your time.

      Love, Barb

    • #589700
      Stevie Steiner
      Managing Ambassador
      Registered On: June 11, 2020
      Topics: 85
      Replies: 1984
      Has thanked: 8764 times
      Been thanked: 10190 times

      And I will say this is not the kind of Christmas present  I was looking for hon. 😪

    • #589690
      Anonymous
      Topics: 0
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      HI Marti first of all you never have taken over the boards enjoy your posts and opinions. Do know at times being online can be little overbearing specially when some say the wrong things and possible hurt one feelings not realizing it. Like staff said in a post there is another human being behind the avi here.

      Do know each and everyone here make a impact for the good. Do wish the best for you Marti and wishing

      You a merry christmas and happy new years.

      Donna

      7 users thanked author for this post.
    • #589515
      Anonymous
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      Busy forum is an entertaining forum.

      Hope to see you back soon.

      Caroline

    • #589514
      Stevie Steiner
      Managing Ambassador
      Registered On: June 11, 2020
      Topics: 85
      Replies: 1984
      Has thanked: 8764 times
      Been thanked: 10190 times

      Marti…   Marti, if you disappear I will say I would be very saddened, your departure will diminish the value of cdh.  I will echo Sylvia and say that you leave me scratching my head with your comment of “crowding the boards”.   Hardly.  Not at all in fact.  Your contributions have enriched the boards if anything.  If you do decide that this is what you want, I will wish you the best always.  This is truly…. unfortunate…  I only hope you are not acting in haste – or anything.  Our heaven has lost a good soul….

      Stevie ❤

      7 users thanked author for this post.
    • #589500
      Sylvia
      Lady
      Registered On: October 10, 2021
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 667
      Has thanked: 16894 times
      Been thanked: 2759 times

      Dear Marti ,

      I can’t say that I agree that you have been posting too much ,
      or even crowding the board as you say.
      Taking it easy for a while is not a bad idea , but I hope you will stay on CDH !
      We need all our Girls here Marti , and you are no exception.
      As you said it yourself , there are new members here asking your advice , and for good reason.
      They would have to miss a valuable source for that advice in the future.
      I have valued your input here very much , and hope that we will continue
      to benefit from your wisdom here.
      We all love you very much Marti !

      I would like to wish you a Merry Christmas and a very Happy 2022 ,

      Love Sylvia.

      • This reply was modified 9 months ago by Sylvia.
      • This reply was modified 9 months ago by Sylvia.
      7 users thanked author for this post.
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