For me, crossdressing isn't just about wearing beautiful womens clothing. It's really about connecting with my inner woman. In 2016, I came to truly embrace that I am more woman than man (in my mind). So I guess I am the proverbial woman trapped in a man's body. If I could snap my fingers and instantly transform myself, I would do it in a heartbeat. My desire to crossdress goes back to when I was 11 or 12. I would catch glimpses of my mom in lingerie when she was in the bathroom and be fascinated by her look. So I would sneak into her undie drawer and try on her bra and nylons and loved the look and feel of them. As time went on I began to really connect the dots on what I was experiencing. Like a lot of men, I would watch porn movies but I would be turned on by watching what the woman was experiencing and fantasizing about myself being in her role. It wasn't about wanting to be in a man-on-man experience, but I truly wished I could be a woman and giving pleasure to a man while enjoying the pleasure that a woman does. I retired early at age 60 in 2017....the extra time allowed with retirement, along with the internet, has really allowed me to go down the rabbit hole. In the past couple years, I have enjoyed discovering the various crossdresser sites and discovering much about myself while at the same time perhaps loathing my male anatomy. But as they say, when life deals you lemons, make lemonade. So I dress when I can as I am closeted due to my married relationship. I could never reveal my true feelings to her as she would never understand nor accept Anne. Likewise there are other family relationships in play that cause my being closeted. Occasionally I get to sneak out as Anne and love being out in public as Anne (I think I am passable). I enjoy chatting up and meeting with my CD friends so if you are interested in friending me, please don't be shy....or meeting me in person in the Milwaukee area although I think I frustrate some people as it can be difficult at times for me to get out.