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So for Thanksgiving my wife outed me to my daughter. She handed a pair of my panties to my daughter and said, “are these yours?” And when my daughter said no, she said, “well they’re not mine!” And with only three of us in the house there was only one possible owner left. I said nothing as she handed me my panties which she knew all along were mine.
She thought it was funny but i thought it was cruel.Next she drags me into Victoria’s Secrets to help her buy new bras (1st time ever). Nothing for me but she did laugh about the Thanksgiving outing again.
Then tonight she asks to borrow one of my night dresses. She’s wearing it now. Strange days indeed.
I recently made an appointment to begin hormone therapy, maybe that touched a nerve? I don’t know. Anyone ever experienced a weird wife behavior like this before?
I are sore corn-fuzzed (confused) by it.
Happy about the hormones but corn-fuzzed by the wife’s erratic behavior.-joanne
Some women are not confrontational but scheming and diabolical (no offense to GG’s) and from what you describe I think your wife is mad at you and poking the bear a bit. I would suggest you proceed with caution. May be stormy times ahead… or not… I don’t know your wife…. what do you think?
Then again could just playing with you as little of teasing. As for the hormones or HRT no big worries not going to happen over night takes alot time. Unless decide to do what I did is speed up the process and went into surgery. Depending on how far will go.
Donna, your perspective kinda rocks. I think many of us might do well to hear what your experiences have been.
vecca you referring to my HRT treatment or other. Knowing in past when was male and woman dated and such was always being played with a good way. As for HRT didn’t really see any noticable changes until around the 3rd month between that notice softer skin as well as smells and mental thought process. plus lot more calmer then before. Without knowing other factors hard to say. on the wife. Speaking from my experience in past.
Hugs Donna
Anyone outing anyone else against their wishes is not cool. 🙁 When we come out, and to whom we are comfortable doing so, should be up to us, not anyone else.
I would try to have a conversation about this, and how it made you feel when she did that. It sure sounds like she is harboring some resentment that you need to work through as a couple.
Oh, Joanne…
I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. So I did both.
I am SO sorry (no pun intended). If my SO did that to me… I think I’d just have a good cry!
Actually, I had a positive experience recently with my SO. She put on a pair of her running tights only to feel a lump on her thigh. She reached down into her tights and pulled out a pair of black panties. She looked at them and asked who they belong to? So I said, “they aren’t mine, are they?” She laughed and had to look a the label, “No,” she says with a smile, “their a size small!”
Hang in there.
Hugs, Barb 🤗
Oof, I haven’t had behaviour like that thankfully but am in my own world of pain at the moment with my SO. I hope things improve for you!
— Abbie 🥰
That was just evil.
It sounds like she is angry with the hormone therapy. That is a step that might make it all seem more real to her. She might be thinking of the possible turmoil her life could be getting into. She could be dealing with some crazy scenarios in her mind of the future.
sounds like there will be a lot for both of you to deal with. Maybe a counselor, or therapist could help?Best of luck, and hugs
Lara
That was not a nice thing your wife did. That is something I would think my wife would do and that is why I’m afraid to bring up my dressing. How did your daughter take it?
Hugs, Liara
The passive aggressive behavior would be a red flag for me. Maybe a phase. Maybe not. I’d keep close tabs on your interactions and be prepared for the worse.
Joanne.
I don’t know how old your daughter is and what her reaction was…or your situation with your wife.
but I don’t think that was even remotely funny…..heartless, cruel and thoughtless…yes!!!
Did she not think once of the way that could have affected your daughter???
Hormone therapy may have tipped her over the edge, but these things need to be discussed rationally…. embarrassing you and possibly splitting up the family does not seem the way forward.
Best wishes, grace x
Thanks Grace. My daughter, who is 25, seemed confused by it as it was completely out of the blue. She had to leave shortly after that and was still processing things. My wife can be impulsive but she’s known for over a year and had plenty of opportunities to out me and never acted. That’s why Thanksgiving was so hurtful.
-joanne
That was very cruel, of your wife, Joanne, Im sorry.
I does sound as if she is very angry, bitter, about your dressing. I am curious, as well, how did your daughter react? Did you and your wife fully discuss your upcoming HRT, and did you listen to her opinions? I know myself, I do sometimes gloss over what my wife has to say, not on my dressing/transforming, but on other issues, and it usually comes back to bite me in the bum.
I do think you need to talk to her, seriously, on this, and know, stormy weather could very well be ahead, be sure of what you want, my dear, and know your life jacket/line, is here
Hugs, Regi👸💖Wrong to out you like that – humilating someone in front of family or friends is pretty low. Having said that, did you involve her in your decision to start hormones, or was it unilateral? If the latter, she’s fairly entitled to be a little pissed off – it is a bit of a game changer, no?
Connie
xxx
Hi Joanne,
It sounds to me as if your wife is the “passive aggressive” type who will not confront you directly but comes at you obliquely, without warning. I am very aware of the type. Your experiences sound like classic examples.
My best guess is that you’re headed into a storm front so clear your decks, batten down the hatches and prepare for the worst.
BTW, how did your daughter react, have you spoken to her since?
Good Luck, keep us posted.
Jillian
Thanks Jillian, i think you may be right so i am preparing for anything now. My daughter and i are close so i know we’ll survive the storm. -joanne
She can be your biggest and best friend through this period, Joanne. Keep her close.
Jillian
So sorry, Joanne. Maybe it’s a phase, maybe she just isn’t ready for a drastic change. Either way, it could have been handled differently. She should have discussed your coming out to your daughter.
Like I said, I’m sorry for you. 😢 I don’t know how I’d take it.
Best wishes for your future.
Much love,
Raquel
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