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  • #578816
    Danica Daroy
    Participant
    Registered On: November 6, 2021
    Topics: 3
    Replies: 27
    Has thanked: 124 times
    Been thanked: 143 times

    Good morning ladies. I’m so excited to share my latest news!! Where do I start? I’m new here (2wks)and I’ve been encouraged so much by all my new friends. On my first Welcoming post, I made mention of the wife not interested in my dress but snidely putting up with it. After all, I didn’t tell her till after being married 20yrs. 🤪 We’ve always been able to talk. Her biggest concern was the grandkids and our single parent son finding out. Anyway,we set limits on my dressing. No public stuff,Only at home and she didn’t want to see any of it. Fast forward to yesterday (Sunday Nov. 21,2021). I’ve really been thinking hard about talking to her about re-evaluating my dressing parameters. She’s always been open to me bringing it up, but doesn’t really want to think about it. I mentioned to her that I really needed let her know what I’m thinking and where I want to go femme wise. Without this conversation, one is tempted to start sneaking around and that’s not going to happen. Over the next 1-1/2 hrs. I managed to tell her about CDH, my femme name, and that if possible,to meet up IN PUBLIC with my new lady friends for lunch. Pause!!!! She was ok with it. Still doesn’t want to involve family. I’m good with that!!🥰 Oh, and I also mentioned that I would really like to attend a Conference. She thought that would be doable as well. It will all be determined by my work schedule as I travel the country. WOW, what a great day!! And to top it off,she asked if she could use some of my makeup that would cover a dark spot she’s concerned about. By all means!!

    Hugs.. Danica 👠❤️💄🥰

    PS. I also asked her that perhaps she would feel a little better if I could show her a picture. She said she wouldn’t want hurt my feelings by laughing out loud. ( Haha). Perhaps later she said.  ❤️

Viewing 8 reply threads
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    • #579064
      Anonymous
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 0
      Has thanked: 0 times
      Been thanked: 0 times

      Hi Danica that’s great news, it must be a great relief to come out in the open to your wife and be accepted,

      I wish i had the courage to come out to my wife but like you I’ve kept it a secret for so long, I’ve been married for 49 years so i think she would feel betrayed if i told her about Roz ,

      Maybe i could tell her sometime in the future ,

      Hugs Roz X

      1 user thanked author for this post.
      • #579080
        Danica Daroy
        Baroness
        Registered On: November 6, 2021
        Topics: 3
        Replies: 27
        Has thanked: 124 times
        Been thanked: 143 times

        Thanks Roz. When I came out to my wife 16 years ago, she was hurt,felt betrayed and just about every other thing you can think of. However since then even though she doesn’t want to be real involved, she has tried to understand that this isn’t something that is going to go away. It’s who I am. I’ve told her the whole scenario. Like many, this came about long before we were married. I have apologized to her for not telling her beforehand, and her comment was she loves me and probably would have married me anyway. We cried as I let her know how deep down the feelings are. She has since come to accept that the man she married really isn’t so bad. I’m blessed. She’s actually left the house to give me opportunity to dress and given me some tops.  Hugs,Danica👠💄❤️

        1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #579047
      Brielle
      Duchess
      Registered On: August 14, 2021
      Topics: 6
      Replies: 487
      Has thanked: 2444 times
      Been thanked: 2053 times

      Hi Danica, what wonderful news! I’m so happy for you that some progress is being made. I remember when I came out to my wife, I told her I had some pictures when she was ready to see them, and she asked to right away. I also thought she’d either laugh or be disgusted, but she was amazed and kept saying how much I look like a woman and how pretty I looked. She did think I was dressed a little too “provocatively” and was I dressing that way b/c I wanted her to but was too timid to tell her (not at all what I want or need).

      So if you do share some, start with the most conservative one(s) and gradually open up the window so she can see how you want to present. Assure her you don’t want to compete with her or that she should dress and do make up similar (unless that’s what you both want, of course!).

      Keep talking and hear her needs while you share yours – it’s the only way.

      Hugs, and congratulations!

      Brielle

      2 users thanked author for this post.
      • #579050
        Danica Daroy
        Baroness
        Registered On: November 6, 2021
        Topics: 3
        Replies: 27
        Has thanked: 124 times
        Been thanked: 143 times

        I appreciate your word Brielle!! How true. I’ll probably start out with just a head pic. I’ll let her curiosity do the rest. 🥰

    • #579015
      Angela Booth
      Lady
      Registered On: August 1, 2020
      Topics: 9
      Replies: 1168
      Has thanked: 4389 times
      Been thanked: 5218 times

      Danica is a name for the Mayfly and when it has its day it is a beautiful thing – Enjoy and have many days…

      3 users thanked author for this post.
      • #579037
        Danica Daroy
        Baroness
        Registered On: November 6, 2021
        Topics: 3
        Replies: 27
        Has thanked: 124 times
        Been thanked: 143 times

        What a beautiful comment Angela!! Thank you so much!!🥰

        1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #578998
      Terri
      Duchess
      Registered On: May 17, 2016
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 231
      Has thanked: 264 times
      Been thanked: 750 times

      My wife doesn’t like to talk about my femme side. I have accepted that. When im going out, I tell her in advance. She says very little. I know that if I had told her before we were married we would have gotten married. We are married 50 years.
      Terri

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #578993
      Sylvia
      Lady
      Registered On: October 10, 2021
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 667
      Has thanked: 16894 times
      Been thanked: 2759 times

      Dear Danica ,
      I am glad everything is working itself out for you.
      I hope your wife will embrace your Feminine side even more over time.

      P.S. You talked about a dark spot your wife is concerned about.
      Do you mean a bruise ?

      Love Sylvia.

      • #578999
        Danica Daroy
        Baroness
        Registered On: November 6, 2021
        Topics: 3
        Replies: 27
        Has thanked: 124 times
        Been thanked: 143 times

        Nah. Just a darker sun spot. Thanks sweetie!! ❤️

        1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #578985
      Terri
      Duchess
      Registered On: May 17, 2016
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 231
      Has thanked: 264 times
      Been thanked: 750 times

      Danica thank you for telling your story. Telling your wife is a big step. My advice is go slow and dont overwhelm her. My wife knows 40 yrs and wants no part of my femme side. I have accepted that. Once you meet others like yourself your life will change. For me BALANCE is the keyword in my life. I have a large family who are very important to me. I highly recommend the Keystone conference. Its a very well run event and a lot of fun. Good luck and welcome to the community.
      Yours Terri

      3 users thanked author for this post.
      • #578992
        Danica Daroy
        Baroness
        Registered On: November 6, 2021
        Topics: 3
        Replies: 27
        Has thanked: 124 times
        Been thanked: 143 times

        I agree totally. The rules that she asked me to follow 15 yrs. ago were never broken. Because we are able to talk (and even laugh/sometimes cry) about it, keeps it all out in the open. She knows I’m the same man she married, only with a different hobby than most. I’ll investigate the Keystone Conference for sure. Thanks Terri!!

        Danica👠💄🥰

        1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #578962
      Liara Wolfe
      Lady
      Registered On: August 14, 2021
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 1607
      Has thanked: 3155 times
      Been thanked: 5436 times

      I’m so happy for you Danica.

      Hugs, Liara

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #578881
      Marcellette Laval
      Lady
      Registered On: February 1, 2021
      Topics: 7
      Replies: 247
      Has thanked: 711 times
      Been thanked: 1289 times

      Danica,

      What wonderful news – I’m so thrilled for you!!

      Marcellette

      3 users thanked author for this post.
      • #578953
        Danica Daroy
        Baroness
        Registered On: November 6, 2021
        Topics: 3
        Replies: 27
        Has thanked: 124 times
        Been thanked: 143 times

        Thank you Marcellette. Encouraging for sure. Keeping that line of communication open I believe is key. Not that we continually talk about it,but at least we both know what page we’re on.
                    Danica👠❤️💄🥰

        1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #578823
      Michelle McQueen
      Lady
      Registered On: June 14, 2021
      Topics: 28
      Replies: 1527
      Has thanked: 10025 times
      Been thanked: 7504 times

      Congratulations Danica on your CD future and your wonderful supporting SO. It seems most wives can deal with our lifestyle within limits with some of their biggest fears are losing the man they married and family and friends finding out. Looks like if you can stay within those boundaries things will work for you. My wife has known about my dressing for some years now and the one thing she says is… “Don’t embarrass me”

      2 users thanked author for this post.
      • #578825
        Danica Daroy
        Baroness
        Registered On: November 6, 2021
        Topics: 3
        Replies: 27
        Has thanked: 124 times
        Been thanked: 143 times

        Thanks Michelle. I’ve heard that as well. Honest and sincere communication I believe is the key.
        Danica❤️👠

        2 users thanked author for this post.
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