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I’m not sure when or why, and maybe it’s just out of being at home for such a long time although I (we, my SO and I) have been out several times in public.
Recently however I’ve noticed a return of feelings of anxiety and nervousness when I am out and dressed. I wear women jeans or capris (not that it is warm), flats or loafers that are more androgynous than femme, although they are woman shoes, panties under it all and a camisole topped by a mans shirt, although stylish and matching. I will also carry a shoulder bag from time to time, and do so more recently.
I’m really feeling anxious however, like it did when I started this over 2 years ago. We were out Friday night, and was wearing capris, a new shirt I had bought with small red and green flowers, and my red suede loafers that match, and a very close to matching bag. My SO and Son were with me. We sat outside at a restaurant and I was feeling so self conscious and and almost afraid of people noticing and or saying something. The bag was probably the most obvious thing, but I think I really worked myself up more than anything.
But this has been happening with more regularity, and I’m not sure why. Although too, I was at my favorite thrift store and tried on some great new flats in the color I needed and another pair of capris, and bought them!
Ugh, really afraid too my SO is going to say something, although she has not.
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