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Okay so background story I have not truly come out to the wife yet, sort of. She knows I like to get dressed up wear panties bras things of that nature and some sexy lingerie, she likes that she’s okay with that. Has long as it is in pri e in our room. I’ve recently started to buy some female clothes and wear them front of her, shes not totally enjoying that.I have ask if she likes it, she say its, weird not weird bad not weird good just weird. Have not told her my feelings of being a CD and how it has been all throughout my life and i wish not to go to deep with it for fear of her becoming upset or scared. she is also not see me with makeup on or wig yet. So big long story here is my question is should I show her pictures of other CDs mainly off of this website is that okay to you ladies my hope is to assimilate her by showing her others that also like this style of life and that show that it is not weird it is natural and okay for people like us and therefore hopefully she will feel more comfortable with it what do you think? </strong
Jenny I think showing her photos of other CDs isn’t a good idea yet. You’ve said that you’ve not “fully come out” to her and that probably explains why she thinks you wearing what you do is weird.
Talk to her, explain how you feel and why you do what you do. Then you can tell her that thousands of men do the same and that you belong to a support web site for people like you. Ask her if she is interested in seeing photos of other CDs but be selective with what you show her.
Small steps are the safest. Help her to understand, don’t just thrust it in her face.
Just my thoughts.
Jenny,
I agree with Jane. A journey of steps is better than one of of leaps and bounds. I came out to my wife with the past year. For us, it was a private discussion between us. She surprised me with her understanding and support for which I feel blessed. However, my wife and I have had several discussions about this new dynamic withi our relationship. For both of us, it has been give and take as our relationship and marriage is too important to both of us.
Despite her support, this aspect of who I am did come as a shock to her which is understanding. She has had many questions and needed assurance of my love for her. Our relationship has grown deeper, but wife has her limits of comfort which includes the use of makeup. As it has taken me 20 years to understand my femininity, I understand my wife’s limits and am thankful for her support.
My advice is to be patient. Have a heart to heart conversation with your wife. Be honest with your feelings, but cognizant of hers. Listen to her and respect her view.
I wish thee the best in your journey. Please know that many of us have been in a similar place and are here to support you.
MacKenzie
There is no one size fits all solution to coming out to your wife. If she is not going to accept it the way you come out doesn’t really matter. I came out to my wife by showing her pictures of myself dressed. We had returned from a party with an open bar and my wife had too much to drink and so had I (just not as much as her). You have to know my wife to appreciate this but the first photo she saw of me dressed completely as a woman she said “You have on too much rouge.” She was pretty out of it that night so I mentioned it a couple of days later and she asked to see the photo again plus more. She had some problems with it at first but has come to completely accept it. She helps me buy everything from underwear to shoes to dresses, etc… Last weekend while we were out shopping she told me how glad she was that we have this in common. Not to be too personal but we have even made love a couple of times with me dressed. But back to my original point it’s the kind of person she is and not how I came out to her. Having a supporting spouse makes all the difference in the world so it’s probably worth a try unless of course she is the kind of person who will go nuts and leave you immediately. Unfortunately there is no one size fits all.
Good luck.
Huggs and kisses,
Suzanne
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