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There is no magic way to open up to your wife with her accepting your desires. You just have to bite the bullet, buck up your courage, and have THE TALK.
Most wives will react with shock unless they already suspect and even then be ready for the usual questions like… “Are you gay?” or “Do you want to become a woman?” or “Why didn’t you tell me this long ago before we were married?”. You should think about this and be ready with answers.
She may be one of the few who likes the idea of you dressing as a female but those wives are very rare. Or she may be semi accepting and after a lot of discussion she will allow you limited dressing in some way. Usually wives don’t want to see us dressed even if they allow it.
You know you wife better than anyone and you must have an idea of how she will react but go slow and ease your fem personality out to her and not overwhelm her with… “I don’t care no matter I gotta dress!!!” Remember she married a man not a woman so listen to all of her concerns and be patient and who knows you may be one of the lucky ones. On the other hand you may not be. Good luck and let us know how it goes. We are here for you.
I didn’t get the chance to add in my original post that I told my wife about my dressing about my dressing about 10 years or so ago.
I told her I had stopped and purged my wardrobe.
As we all know, we purge, but come back.
I have the urge to wear the clothes that let me feel like me.
Wearing a bra and panties, and everything else, feels so nice.
I want to experience it again.
Joanne,
how did your wife react when you told her 10 yrs ago?
that should give you some idea of how she’ll react now.with my first wife I new from the beginning she would never accept and I was proven right when I came out about 8 years in. We stayed married for another 20 plus years but our relationship was never the same .
But with what ever you do welcome back to wonderful world
Natalie 💋
As always, the place to start is communications. Of course, tell your wife about how you feel…since its impossible to explain why. Then ask her how she feels. Let the conversation happen.
Speaking from experience (not my current relationship but similar issues with prior relationships) I would sit her down, get it all out in the open and then just sit back and let her breathe.
Its going to most likely be a shock for her. Let her breathe for a bit and try and comprehend it.
If it helps, set a sunset clause that you both are comfortable with (i.e on May 21st we will have another open, honest conversation about this).
Honestly one of the best things my partner did for me when we first started dating was to let me have the ball in my court. I set limits on when/how I wanted to see it and then they stuck to those faithfully.
It gave me a sense of control to be able to say, “Hey not tonight its been a long work day.” but then to also say, “Hey these panties would be really cute on you. Lets try them out.” Since they were also faithful in following it so closely, it gave me a sense of trust. Build on that trust.
Find ways to empower her. Maybe take her panty shopping and let her pick out a pair for you. Or maybe the same thing but with perfumes.
I wish there was a magic bullet OP, I truly do. I realize Im a bit of a rare breed in these parts (cis woman who accepts, appreciates and loves her CD’ing partner) but Im also someone’s partner and can understand where your wife is coming from.
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