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So fellow CDHers…
I’m a little frustrated about the way we congratulate each other for our posts! So, we say ‘thanks’ and…
Exactly… getting a thanks is like an orgasm without release! Sex without orgasm! Why does one say ‘thanks’? I would rather a heart, a kiss, a star…
The better way is to actually reply to the post you like! This is vital to the health of our community!
We need to have our voices heard… not a ‘thanks’. OK, it gives some indication that the person identifies with your comment but… why? Why actually gives more of a firm idea of what has been commented on. In one way… one can identify if one has gone astray or whether one is on target! Good for everyone xxxBy all means press the ‘thanks’ option but please, please back it up with a comment!
OR… Do you agree?Hugs to all, Polly
Hi Polly,
Why not is my attitude. I make a point of trying to thanks anyone who has bothered to reply on any thread I’ve created, I guess its just my concept of politeness.
I also thank people who have posted something that has made a good point, or tickled me. I’m not necessarily going to respond otherwise.
And some posts are so magnificent I sit back in awe and think, “I can’t add to that” – but I can click thanks to show my appreciation.
Now, though, I’m confused – should I click thanks for your original post?
Thanks 😉
Marti x
Marti…
For me a reply not only compliments the writer but also helps… at times, to consolidate my own ideas or opinions. It also continues a thread that may lead to some unknown ‘eureka’ moment for someone else!
Ok…a ‘thanks’ is cool and I use it enough myself… but, I feel there needs to be something more… meaningful. That is the nature of my post.
Love Polly 💋💋💋
Yep, no worries, I understand where you’re coming from. Forums are imperfect engines, sometimes we just have to muddle our way through them and make the best of it. (I have to confess, I’ve yet to get my head around the ‘friends’ feature.)
Marti x
Oops… I pressed ‘thanks’! Girl, you are on to the ‘friends’ thing as well… is this a bad hangover from Facebook?
I’m happy to befriend sisters here but I ask… why? When I can pm anybody without having to be ‘friends’. I like everybody here… no enemies only good folk here… that’s the blessing of this site!
Thanks for that comment dudette!
We have limited options, Polly. I will click thanks to things that I agree without feeling the need to comment to say why I agree.
If I am looking for comments then I will give my opinion and ask for others about an issue and then the thanks are incidental.
Since I am a newbie many of the threads that read have been around for a while so I will respond with a single comment that makes note that I agree or disagree with some of the things posted rather than individual posts to each of the comments.
Now to address your point about having our voices heard I am not sure that scrolling endless posts with little more than “well said” or “I agree” or “that makes sense” is going to make a meaningful difference to having our voices heard.
We do have a problem that we are not recognized and accepted by society at large and in way too many cases by our SO’s. That to me is priority #1 when it comes to having our voices heard but it is not going to change as long as we only use our voices within CDH. This should be our base but we need more outreach on social media. We need to make our voices heard where non Crossdressers can discover that we are their relatives, friends, colleagues and just regular normal people.
So how do we make our voices heard outside of CDH? How do we bring attention to our dilemma? How can we change minds so that we are fully accepted within our society?
I don’t know all of those answers my dear Polly but I am willing to bet that together there are more than enough of us here at CDH to make a start and getting the snow ball rolling. Once it is moving then the momentum will carry it forward as it grows.
I would love to hear some suggestions myself.
Warm hugs
Rowena 👩🏻🦳
Warm Hugs…
Yes… I am replying to you, in addition to thanking you for ” broaching” the subject.
I always , ” Reply” when I want to beyond the efforts of letting someone know I have read your comments…and ” Appreciate” your efforts in expressing your thoughts…
THANKS…
Dr. T.J.
It’s sad with all the changes going on in the world… we as cross dressers, still are outside the box of the “norm” a lot of what I’ve noticed, is even in the lgbtq community… we aren’t really fully included so I def agree that we do need out voices heard… I think it could be a good topic for a thread in itself on how to get that ball rolling without being like a lot of the groups out there currently who are saying you “have to give us what we want” instead of “we want to teach you about who we are and why we are” I think we could come a long way with that outlook
Hi Polly,
Personally, I use ‘thanks’ much as Marti has described – to acknowledge a point well made, to acknowledge a reply, to let people know their post was read… Sometimes I will add a comment, but not if I have nothing further to add. It can also be time driven – if I have limited time, I may just thank and move on to see as much as I can in the time I have.
So, simply, personally I don’t agree. If people just want to click ‘thanks’, that’s fine by me. No need to say why you said thanks, I’m happy you took the time to read and acknowledge.
Having said that, I think this raises an interesting point about how we perceive and interpret the use of ‘thanks’ (or anything else for that matter). What can mean little (or a lot) to one person can carry a very different meaning to another – something we should all try to be cognisant of…
Isabel x
So, Isobel… what is important to one is less so to another? Totally agree.. all I am trying to do is… it is easy to click a button rather than actually reply to someone.
We easily miss out on someone’s point of view because clicking a button or link simply takes away a burden of replying!Or not… as you say.
❤️ Polly
Are we creating work for someone? Or is it only a built in feature of the software and just live with it?
Hi Polly if you look at my stats as i have thanked a lot of times its because i read everyone that i thank i read a lot and believe that everyone who replys to a post deserves a thanks ..So thanks he he ..
Stephanie Bass
Oh, dear… a ‘thanks’! However, I read almost every post too… I may miss something important to my own journey… I can never discount the words of others!
Bien dit, chérie
Same here Polly such a fast paced world we should all s-l-o-w- just for you Grace slow down a little and listen to your friends as they sometimes speak a lot of truth. Hugs girlfriend..
Stephanie
I sometimes feel odd about thanking someone for a post. Sometimes they are revealing something personal or even negative about themselves. It doesn’t always seem like the right thing to just click the thanks button. I try to respond when I have something to add but at the end of the day the thanks button is a nice courtesy. It also is an affirmation that someone is reading what you post. Even if we don’t agree about what the person says it still thanks someone for sharing and while not being the perfect fit all the time , I think it’s a good thing
I completely agree. Sometimes though either you just don’t know how to respond to a post or don’t have time… and I feel it’s nice to be able to acknowledge that you have taken the time to read a post…. I myself would like more options than just… “thanks”
i love hearing and reading everyone’s statements.. especially on my posts… as I try to do better with responding to things I hope everyone else does but, like I said earlier if I don’t and just hit the thanks… knows I did read what you worried just either didn’t know exactly how to respond at the time, am not knowledgeable enough to respond, or didn’t have time… but wanted to let you know I did read it.
❤️💋🥰 lots of love Tonya
You’re absolutely correct. I have to admit to being guilty of the occasional “thanks” without making a reply. Especially if it’s a topic that I don’t have enough interest in to make a comment. So, other buttons that convey different levels of reaction, would probably be good for the poster, in case someone is feeling less motivated to post a comment.
Another concern, the extra levels of reaction buttons may make posting comments even less common. “I liked the post, I don’t need to comment on it.” Things like that… I dunno.
I do like your suggestion that we should comment if we “thank”.
Hugs,
Rayna
What bothers me is why count how many you have thaned and have been thanked. Personally i dont care how many have thanked me or i have thanked. It seems like it turns it into a competition or to make you feel you have not thanked or been thanked.
Best to have an agree or like button. Better still just post you agree or like. No need for this counter of how many has been done. It just make people feel uncomfortable.
Stevie
I can understand the usefulness of different or additional possibilities in acknowledging a topic or a post that one finds more than just significant. I can also understand the need to be acknowledged, especially if one is new (or newer) to this site. You post a topic and you want it to be considered at least significant enough that people will respond. Commenting or at least thanking is, I would suspect, for many a means of validating the significance as well as the desire to be able to say something and have it be accepted.
If I post a new topic, I will always thank (or sincerely try to) everyone who posts because I appreciate that someone (and it doesn’t mean the most or many or even two) has found it interesting enough to provide their own comment.
I’ll always thank the original poster if I open up some topic, and read it, sometimes whether I reply or not. If it’s significant enough for me to read, it deserves a thank. I’ll also thank (or really try to) those that ‘reply’ to one of my posts in a topic (though for the life of me I still can’t figure out how to get my own ‘reply’ to a post to be listed below that post and not at the top of all new posts!).
And I will certainly thank others whose posts I read and find something that speaks to me, whether I reply or not.
I’m probably a little bit on the spectrum as I will read every reply to my forum topic, think about each response, consider phrasing, etc. I’ll also look at the those little numbers under my icon and think about them and what they mean…and try to make sure I stay consistent with what I just typed above!
I agree that they can take on an unrealistic importance, but I also think we all at one time or another need to be ‘petted’ and reminded that we’re all, alright, decent people with cares and concerns and worries and especially desires to be accepted. At the moment, ‘thanks’ helps in that respect, as least to me anyway.
p.s. you don’t have to thank me for this, it’s up to you, but know that it’s always appreciated as I look at every one and often want to know more about who did thank me.
Chloe.
Spot on…thanks x
I don’t always have the time and ability to do more than thank them for their thoughts and contributions, but I would at least like them to know I took the time to read and appreciate their views. If I’m able, I try to circle back if I feel that I can add something meaningful, but there are times when I can’t or I don’t have anything else to offer other than what’s been said already. The repetitive “you go girl” responses can become a little much too!
Hi .
Just adding my ” thanksworth”
I cant see anything is broken…why create more work for the powers that be!!
write a good post…deserves the thanks.
Agree with a post… give the thanks.
Job done.
Thankfully, grace xx
Totally agree
I was on another website that had no thanks or acknowledgement. You often wondered if anyone read what you posted. I am thankful that this site has the thank feature. I am new, so I can’t comment if it needs improvement.
I agree with you Eva its nice to have thanks.
Best Wishes
Sarah
That’s the way I look at it. Appreciating the post and causing us to ponder the issue, without the necessity of a reply, unless you choose to respond!
💖
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