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I’m vaguely bothered by the word gurls.
Not in an outraged or hide my head under a pillow way, but I just don’t like the word. I’ve noticed that it seems to be popping up lately in place of “girls” and ….well.. it bothers me somehow.
I first saw the word as a descriptor of crossdresser or transvestite and the connotation was derogatory and (in my opinion) demeaning. Referring to a sexually submissive person. Someone who doesn’t deserve or have the right to dress as or be a man, but isn’t a woman either. So …a … gurl. Something different, something in between. Someone beneath both or either sex. Someone to be dominated by one and used by the other.
Maybe I’m being overly sensitive, maybe I misunderstood the context of the word when it was used. Maybe my panties are in a wad over nothing. Is it one of those words that mean one thing when WE use it and something completely different when THEY use it? I just do not find being referred to as a gurl is welcoming or accepting.
Am I alone in feeling this way? Do any of you have a similar reaction to the word?
If I’m off base here, feel free to tell me. If you think I should pull up my big girl skirt and get over myself, tell me that too. If anyone is offended, I’m sorry. I needed to get this off my chest before it festered and poisoned my time here.
Thanks for taking the time to read my b**ch fest. I look forward to your replies (if there are any, of course)
I have read it too and don’t care for it. First, I am way too old to be a girl. Second, I prefer to think of myself as a lady or a woman. I get that there are some for whom CD is a hobby. I would say for most of us though it’s part of who we are and I don’t want someone calling me a gurl. That applies to a fellow LGBT or someone else.
<p style=”text-align: left;”>I guess I never really gave it much thought. I myself have used that term. But I do see your point, and it does make sense. I think from this day forward I will refer to myself and others like me, as well as girl, woman, or lady. Thank you so much for your thoughts. Hugs Rochelle.</p>
I am with Rochelle, never gave it much thought. I don’t use the term, I always refer to the other members here as Ladies or ya’all…lol
Very well said Rhonda.
Jillian,
I have never exactly explained why, but gurls has never sat well with me. I don’t see gurls as derogatory, but I prefer not to use it. For me, I think, its usage conveys laziness or improper English. This may stem from habit of always using proper grammar whether writing formally or just texting.
Mac
Jillian you’re certainly not off base. I completely agree. I don’t hide my head under a pillow but I do bang my forehead against the wall whilst crying “Why, why, why?”
It’s certainly one of the words in the less pleasant elements of the CD world that does suggest submission, or inferiority or, in some case, almost an exclusivity. For heavens sake, if we aspire to dress like, be seen as or even be accepted as women or girls then let’s use the correct words and not make up rubbish like ‘gurls’; and just to show I’m an equal opportunity complainer, I dislike “boi” for the same reason.
There are a few words that ring my alarm bells when I’m looking for members accounts that need to be deleted. Anything that suggests sexual activity, or is demeaning or suggestive, gets special consideration.
Jillian,
I can’t say it necessarily bothered me to extent I’d hide my head under the pillow; but if I’ve ever used the term or thought about using it I know I’ve at least had reservations about it; tranny brings an even stronger discomfort. I have not been in an open environment like this where others on this journey we share have the opportunity to discuss what we are experiencing. I’m grateful for you expressing your feelings about this, it confirms my own discomfort with the terms, and hopefully I’ll avoid introducing them to refer to myself or anyone else that is exploring their gender identity.
Kim
I’d like to thank you all for taking the time to reply to my question. I thought that maybe I was just being a little overly sensitive about this. We all just want to be accepted for who we are, to use words (when referring to ourselves) that set us apart doesn’t make sense. Well, not to me anyway. I find that I’ve been reluctant to join in the chat since then.
Jane, I agree I don’t like the word “boi” either. Another sexualized made up word.
I would prefer never to called a tranny, either Kim. At least use the full word 🙂.
Thanks again, Everyone
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