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Hi ladies!
Before I get into today’s poll, I want to let you know this will be my last poll for a while. Why? Because I’ve realized that I may come across as trying to monopolize the polls here on CDH, which is the last thing I want to do. I’ve been a member of CDH for almost one year now, and in that time I’ve posted more than 100 polls already! I’ve given you fun polls, polls that make you think, and some polls that probably touched on topics that you may have wondered about, but never brought them out into the open to discuss. I’ve also provided commentary about myself and my experiences and perspective on almost all of those polls, so that you’ve learned a lot about me. Truthfully, I enjoy creating those polls. I love the interaction they bring and the discussions they’ve led to, and I think most of you enjoy participating in them as well. But it’s time now to give another sister a chance. But I’ve still got a long list of potential poll questions, so perhaps in the future I’ll start up again.
I hope you all understand.
So…, on to today’s poll! 🙂
We all know how absolutely amazingly wonderful it is to be a crossdresser. To be able to transform ourselves into a woman is a thrill of incredible intensity as we get to experience some of the joy that comes from being a woman. The process of transformation, of selecting our lingerie, doing our makeup, picking out a dress and heels, accessorizing our outfit with jewelry, spritzing on just the right perfume, making sure our hair looks pretty, and picking the right purse to complement our outfit all adds up to total sensory overload! It’s fantastic! And then to go out into public, to be seen as a woman, to be treated as a woman, to blend in as a woman, to have experiences as a woman, and to basically live life as a woman is a high that is difficult to comprehend, much less duplicate. I love doing it and know that you all do as well.
But…, while crossdressing and going out as a woman makes me joyfully happy, I started wondering about what really makes me the happiest. Why did I wonder about that? I don’t really know. It just popped into my mind and started percolating there.
And I came to this realization. For me, it’s spending time with my wife. That is what makes me the happiest. Period. Full stop. No further discussion is needed. The joy of my life is my wife, and the thing that makes me the absolute happiest is spending time with her.
So of course, that got me to wondering…
What makes you the happiest? Crossdressing, or something else?
This poll may sound like an easy one to respond to, but I’d suggest you reflect on this one a bit before you reply, as I think it will be really insightful. And yes, I’m asking what makes you the happiest, not just what makes you happy (because absolutely yes, crossdressing makes all of us happy!).
Hugs,
Holly
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Holly, I understand the work it takes to formulate and write a poll and you do it so well and easily. Thank you for each and every one of them. You make the forums so much more enjoyable and interesting while causing us to consider things we might not have otherwise. As far as hogging the boards, I don’t see it that way. Any of us can make a poll or a thread about what ever and your efforts aren’t distracting from anyone else. There is room for all so I hope you continue entertaining us as only Holly can do.
Holly,
I voted something else. Crossdressing has given me some of my happiest moments….times when I felt most at peace and in touch with my authentic self. That was before I realized I was trans. Crossdressing opened a door to a whole new life. Living as a transgender woman is what makes me happiest now. As I’ve said before, the clothes have become an important part of my self expression. But they aren’t the source of my happiness. If you’re trans this will make sense.
Regarding your propensity for polls, I don’t have a problem with it. This isn’t a competition. There’s nothing stopping anyone else from posting a poll themselves. Heck, I’ve posted a handful myself. Frankly, I’d love to see more polls. Not just from you, but anyone else so inclined. FWIW.
/EA
I think you should be Holly Polly! Nothing wrong with polls as they can be quite thought provoking, such as yours.
Yes crossdressing makes me happy and is now a way of life. What makes me the happiest though? So many things really, sometimes something happens when in that moment in time is the happiest I have felt until reality clicks back in. The real happiness is that we have so many of these moments in life to recall when things aren’t so good.
Hi Holly, please do not stop, what you provide is so valuable, it would be very missed by all of us.
I voted ‘other’ as I “stopped” crossdressing well over a year ago. I have transitioned and now live as a woman, a trans woman, and that is one of the happiest things I have ever done in my entire life!
Hugs girlfriends,
Ms. Lauren M
Holly,
There has not been much that has made me truly happy since my wife passed away in November 2021. Before she passed away, my answer to this question would have been the same as yours. We were together for 42 yrs, she was the love of my life and we were very close. I once told her that being with her, no matter what we were doing even if it was just sitting staring at the wall, made me incredibly happy.
So it’s been very tough since she passed but the thing that has made me the happiest since then is not crossdressing per se or even going out in public en femme for the first time in May 2022 but has been my personal acceptance of and my comfort with who I really am, which led to me now living 90% of my life as a woman. I am happy being Fiona and am glad my life has taken this new and wonderful direction.
As for polls, if you need a break by all means take one but make sure you start again soon. I’m sure I speak for many here when I say we always like to participate in the topics you bring up for discussion.
Fiona
This is a difficult question for me to answer, but I’m going to answer as honestly as I can in case there are other people who feel the same way and think they’re alone for feeling this way. I’m not a happy person and I haven’t been for years. Ever since my teens when I first attempted suicide I became a manic-depressive person but my mind has been stuck in the depressive state for years. In the last few years I’ve been trying to fix that, and even though I think I’ve made the right decisions (including coming out as a CD, trying to be more social, volunteering, .etc), none of these have made me happy in the long run. I don’t regret these changes I’ve made, but my mind still belittles everything and I end up thinking nothing I do matters. Now when I try to think of what makes me happy, I honestly don’t know. I can’t even put into words what happiness feels like. It seems like a totally alien emotion to me.
So, if I can’t be happy, and I don’t want to be sad, what can I do? I find keeping busy calms my mind. I have several hobbies that keep me busy, and I’m fortunate enough to have a career that keeps my mind occupied with trying to solve problems. When my mind works, hours go by without an issue, and in the end I have work to show for it. When it’s idle, however… well you know what happens with “idle hands”.
So for me, happiness is not having my mind thinking I’m human garbage. I don’t post this to get sympathy, and I apologize if what I’ve written offends anyone. I know this is supposed to be a fun, casual poll and here I am being Debbie Downer (um… apologies to anyone on here with that name). But I write this for people who have tried different things to be “happy” but for some reason are never able to achieve it. You’re not alone. The quest for happiness can be a tricky journey and it may seem impossible. Don’t give up. The most important thing you can do with your life is to keep trying to live it.
Having spent most of my life battling depression and anxiety, I just wanted to say you’re not alone. It sounds like you are doing what you need to cope. Keep doing it. I never believed in “fake it til you make it” until it actually happened, and while crossdressing didn’t cure my mental health, embracing all I am has paid huge dividends. Be well.
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Thanks for sharing so honestly. Just revealing these feelings and perspectives proves that you are the total opposite of ‘human garbage’.
Hang in there and keep sharing. We love to have you here and look forward to a time when you peek out from being anonymous.
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Oh, and I hope you will PM me.
I love crossdressing. I’ve been doing it my whole life. When I would slip into a pair of pantyhose, or put on stockings, I would feel an energizing burst of excitement. Slip into a pair of heels and that feeling gets stronger. Put on a bra, stronger still. Put on a dress or skirt and I’m in some kind of euphoric haze. It was exciting, pleasurable and wonderful. Those feelings and the intensity of them varied, depending on what I was wearing.
When I began going out, those feelings intensified. When I bought my first pantyhose while wearing short girl’s shorts, platform wedge heels and sheer to waist pantyhose and showing lots of leg, my euphoria, thrill and excitement levels were insane. Everytime I bought pantyhose dressed like that I felt those feelings. I thought that was the ultimate. I\it could never be surpassed until I went shopping for shoes.
To be trying on shoes and walking around in them showing off legs in pantyhose with sexy shoes where others could watch and voice or nod their approval was totally insane euphoric, thrilling and exciting.
Shopping for and buying panties, bras and dressed, while a bit more manageable emotionally, they weren’t much behind the pantyhose and shoes.
Does crossdressing make me happy? I don’t know. I do know it makes me feel different. I can’t feel that way from anything else, and I love it.
The poll doesn’t show up for me, but I’d have voted “other”. While crossdressing contributes to my happiness (the self-acceptance is actually the important bit), nothing compares with the joy I get from my family. My wife is the love of my life and I’d rather do nothing with her than something with anyone else, and my daughter and I are very close (even if I’m not out to her yet). I have literally never been happier in my life than I am right now. Take THAT, depression!
Hmmmm. Interesting question. I do get sad when I pack Peta away.
Its like saying goodbye to an old friend.
But. No crossdressing isn’t high on my happy list. My faith would be number1. Relationships. Work. Building. Sunrise and sunsets. Walks with the dogs. Working hard with other blokes doing farm stuff.
Holly, don’t stop posting polls – I really enjoy them. You raise some serious issues as well as fun ones….please don’t stop.
Regarding what makes me happiest. Certainly crossdressing is up there, but rather predictably my wife, my kids and my grandkids are really what make me happiest.
Hugs to all
ChristineHi Holly,
I’ve just read everything that has been posted here, so far. In looking at the names of those who posted something. It’s pretty much all the same girls who participate and comment in all of your polls. it’s the same group! When looking back at those of CDH that remain active. While there is somewhat of a revolving door of new people coming in and some who go silent. There seems to be a core of those who remain active. Judging from how promptly responses occurred, I think everyone looks forward to your polls. Honestly it brings on dialogue that would never occur if it weren’t for you. Please don’t stop, unless you just need to. You have stimulated an enormous amount of reflection and helped many let out and grow comfortable with their deepest thought.
As to this particular poll. Becoming Roberta makes me the happiest right now. I have my wife, 2 daughters, three grandkids and lots of passions. Allowing Roberta out this last year or two has truly made me the happiest.
“There seems to be a core of those who remain active.” Roberta
Thanks for illuminating this participation issue. I am new here and was a bit surprised to see that there are 40,600+ members with so little participation from the vast majority of them. It’s tough to keep secretive people involved, yes, but wow. A lot of crossdressers are driven, so I thought that that would help them stay engaged.
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I can’t seem to find the spot to vote.
I vote other.I hope you keep doing the polls Holly.
There is a great group that seem to be most active on the site. I continue to learn from their responses.
I have been fairly active and will probably be less so as I am getting into my busier season. On the other hand, it’s hard to stay away. You are my special, wierd like me friends.
With love,
Heidi Hi Holly, I sincerely hope you weren’t bullied into taking a rest. You are spot on saying your polls were varied, insightful, made us think etc. And I think you are providing a valuable service to our community. Also there is nothing stopping any of us posting our own polls if we so desired.
So on to answering your post…two years ago I would have answered crossdressing no question. I came out to my wife before we were married, I had to. I was trying to do everything right. We made love after I told here about Trish. I was feeling pretty good about us and our future but unfortunately it didn’t last and it ended up being the albatross around my neck.
Now with the help of several of my girlfriends here at CDH and else where things are changing, she has become accepting but not supportive. But that’s fine. We’re closer than we been for a long long time and I’m hopeful it will continue to the point where I’m happiest with my wife. Prayers are welcomed. Wow, talk about bearing your sole. But in true Holley form if it helps just one of my sisters it’s worth it.
Trish ❤️
Holly,
I love your polls a hope you continue to make them as long as you want to.
The who that makes me happy is my wife and then my family. Then there are my animals and then there are my hobbies.
Crossdressing doesn’t necessarily make me happy, it is an obsession created by a condition that I have never fully understood. I call it gender fluidity but I have no idea what it is, it’s only a name I use to try and grasp this thing. Crossdressing does however bring me a sense of peace and some joy as well.
thank you for a great question
Holly, thank again for another thought provoking poll which has, as always piqued my interest… yes I am very happy (to rephrase your question) To be able to transform myself into a woman, my alter ego, is a thrill of incredible intensity as I get to experience the joy from being a woman… the transformation process is so gratifying…selecting intimates, a woman’s decision “what to wear” a dress, or a skirt & blouse, panty hose and strappy heels, makeup and my bobbed short hairstyle.. feeling so pretty as I look in the mirror to see my feminine self and yet I also feel happiness with my “manly “ alter ego which embraces my wife, children, grandchildren and my obligations that keep me occupied during retirement… I have found happiness in balancing my alter egos …and yet I am not the only one as you follow the responses many are balancing their CD and family life. Thank you for listening and THANK YOU Holly and please continue your insightful polls. Warmest regards, Leonara
Gee, I can’t tell you what makes me happiest. It would depend on the situation. My wife makes me happy every day. My ability to play music makes me happy, especially with others. Creating a new craft thing also makes me happy. Making a delicious and pretty meal makes me happy. Having taken part in a cause to help people and seeing a victory there makes me happy. Crossdressing makes me happy as well. It would be like asking me who your favorite child is. I cannot say that there is any one that makes me “happiest,” they all contribute to making me happy in a world where there isn’t much to help us be happy. Wars, pollution, and such make it quite sad, so we have to do what we can to stay happy, even a little, or we would all be down in the dumps all the time.
At this time in my life….crossdressing give me the MOST pleasure of all and when giving the privacy and freedom, it is ALL I want to do with my available free time. Unfortunately, the opportunities are “far and few”, but I try to take full advantage when the occasions occur. The wife is retired but is away to care for an aging parent, a few nights every few weeks or so…this, meabs “play time”….I’ll take whatever I can get. Prior to Covid, I could, and would, dress daily, during the weekdays when I had the home all to myself…just me and the dog, a crossdressers BEST friend…!!! I miss those days, but life goes on….no reason to deprive myself…just accept reality and enjoy the times that I can…!!!
What a wonderful thought provoking poll! For myself, I am almost always happy. There are so many life experiences and people that have made me happy. I enjoy almost every part of life. I can’t pick any one… or ten. As for crossdressing, it certainly soothes me internally but does it bring happiness? It certainly doesn’t bring unhappiness but more of a calming effect for me. Michelle
Flying little airplanes used to make me happy. Sadly, my wife left me last year and in the divorce settlement, she got half of everything and half of my pension. I can’t live and fly airplanes anymore cause there is just not enough money for it. Crossdressing does make me happy and I do it once or twice a week. In addition to that , spending time with my mother, sister and brothers and their families makes me happy. I have a new grand niece and she is a living doll!
Honestly, spending any time with my sons is my happy time. The majority of the time, I would say I am content and there are times when I feel fulfilled by some activities, but the truly happy moments are with my sons.
I find this to be a really interesting question and one that I am struggling to answer. For me there are things that I am motivated to do, not doing them lowers my mood and makes me feel that I am wasting time where doing them makes me more content, not necessarily happy. I guess its a bit like cleaning the house, it gets to the point where it is nagging at you so you do the cleaning and feel better afterwards but I guess for most people doing the cleaning doesn’t make them really happy, just content.
Crossdressing is one of those things for me, it is something that nags at me and when I dress I am content but in itself it doesn’t make me really happy.
There are so many things in life that make me happy, so choosing what makes me happiest is difficult to nearly impossible. While dressing does make me happy, very happy, it is not near the top of my list.
Like the OP, my wife probably is what makes me happiest, because nearly everything else that makes me happy, including dressing en femme, is better when I do it with her. I love all types of outdoor activities and am very happy, cycling, hiking, climbing, SCUBA diving, to name just a few activities. My two adult daughters make me happy, and a soon to be born granddaughter will not doubt add to that happiness.
Basically, I am a happy person who has had an amazing life that has been nearly always fun and happy. Sure, it has had is down moments, like losing my parents, but that is expected in life.
One of my happiest moments though, was when I just accept myself that I like to dress en femme. I went through the usual self doubt and internal battle, but when I finally just excepted the fact I enjoy dressing, that it hurts no one and that if anybody has a problem with me in a dress, it is their problem not mine. That realization was so liberating that it became a very happy turning point in my life.
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