Just a note to say that for Transgender/Gender non-conforming children there is a fabulous group in the UK called ‘Mermaids’ who provide support and advice as well as advise on national policy in regards to transitioning and transgender children
Their site has a lot of useful information and can be contacted for more if needed. I know that many on here are not from the UK, but the ethos of the information is still sound and well recommended and the web based support area is accessible for world wide use.
Hope that helps with the child support side – sadly its not helpful to the parents acceptance by their partners ..
I have found that coming out when married is often an issue as the wife feels cheated as they have not signed upto having a spouse who was more fem than masculine – and also that they had been keeping things from them for several years..
there is no simple answer other than try to build trust and compromises into your dressing, resect their wishes and set boundaries. Do acts of random kindness to show your appreciation when you do get some token acceptance, but its not going to be easy to manage.
Put yourself in their situation and how you would react if the boot was on the other foot .. if they wanted to pass them selves off as a male and wear a suit, false beard and jock strap and go out to the pub smoking a pipe … you may take a while to come to terms with that …but mat not ..
So – small steps, kind words and lot of patients …