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Overall, the effect has been good. We talk about clothing, jewelry and makeup. She still won’t go out shopping with me while dressed, but has become quite tolerant of my wardrobe around the house; we even share a few things. For a situation which is fairly new to us both, I consider the relationship very good.
I was discovered by a little error in 2015. My wife became angry and upset. We talked for a while then went quiet for about 2 weeks. Then we started to take walks around the neighborhood and talk. Then the surprise of my life we were at a hotel for a family situation but away from family and she had bought me a few items and we talked. From that time on it appeared she was OK with me dressing but on occasion not a lot. I kept it that way and then things turned south and seems to be she is disliking it more and more. I wish I knew why and what is causing the change in opinion. She tolerates it but usually makes off hand remarks or gives me the “REALLY” look like I’m doing the stupidest thing in the world. I hope no one has it turn south on them like this. I almost wish I had never been found out I enjoyed Sara a whole lot more then and was able to be Sara a whole lot more.
Well that is my story thanks for listening.
SaraMy beloved of 20 years “knows but does not want to know”.
So as “reported elsewhere in these pages”, I can only be Caty if she is away from home or in turn if I take off for an overnight stay somewhere. Which I do on a regular basis as I volunteer for a charity on the other side of Melbourne and “Cant hack the traffic” to drive home after one of my meetings down there.
My ex wife of 28 years hated it all with a passion and I’m convinced had the subject been discussed before the wedding, she would have run a mile.. I “owned up” just before our first child was born and it went downhill from there. But the saving grace there was my job involved lots of domestic and international travel, So I always “had company”.
Reverting to the present, I just wish my SO would “understand”… Not even necessarily “accept” my CD’ing.
There’s a universe of difference in those two words
Caty
My dressing was a huge factor in why my wife left. She never saw me dressed nor did she find my stash. She saw my eBay purchase history and I simply came clean.
It was kind of ironic because before she found this out, there were times when I would criticize others for something they do or the way they choose to live. She would then give me a long and drawn out lecture about how important it is to accept people for who they are…………….
Yes, I would love to have a relationship with someone who fully accepted, but I’m not that good at charming the ladies and not sure how to let them know without embarrassing myself.
I seem to be in pretty much the opposite of most of you girls. My relationships have been strictly with men. The best lasted for over three years and was very fulfilling, but he bent to his family’s wishes and we parted ways. The oddest I think is the man who tried to get me to dress and be male to be with him. I could only endure that for a few months, and could not even be male all the time either, so I snuck my dressing on the side.
Most of my partners have been very tolerant of my femme self and wish I could have found the love and relationship that so many of you girls have found and worked so hard to maintain.
PaulaF
I found the that the only relationship that works for me is with other cds but i live in a small town that is not cd friendly at all so here i am alone again but im not gonna give up looking
Well the las woman i was seeing didnt want any part of it.i found most women dont approve.ive been married 3 times an i tryed to stop dressing but that didnt work.over the years ive in braised my feminine side of me .i stopped doing the macho thing being a female is the happiest ive ever been.ive always felt i was in the wrong body since i was 12.i make a better GF than a BF
I met my GF 3 yrs ago, just about this time! I invited her over to my house after dating for about 3weeks and she discovered a red hair in my brush. I said it could’ve been my daughter’ friend or something ,but she kept questioning me and said it looks thick like a wig . I reassured her there was no other woman and she said ( being sarcastic) “well maybe it’s your wig and I can help you with your makeup too”. I stood there and couldn’t believe what I just heard! I didn’t respond and we just moved on. Later that night, at some point she threw her panties at me and said “why don’t you put these on”. I couldn’t get them on fast enough! So right then I confessed to her it was actually my wig hair in the brush and I like to dress feminine! She said she had a feeling and she actually adores and encourages my femininity! After hiding this part of me for soo long with past relationships,I am truly grateful I no longer have to! However I am still in the closet with family.
As I’ve said before it has been an uphill battle for years and has caused a couple of temporary separations. In the last few years she has become more tolerant and through a lot of talking even more understanding that this is not a sexual fetish but it is who I am, hardwired if you will.
After I retired I have become more open with my dressing, I don’y hide things anymore, just open my dresser or closet and there is my stuff. I’ve just got to a point in life where if you don’t like me then don’t talk to or be around me then. It’s that simple. I nearly died twice, it gives you a whole new perspective on what’s important in life. To me being the real me is important, I can’t and won’t hide anymore.
My wife whom I love very much has told me she’d rather have a living Heather than a dead Bryan. What else can I say.
Take care, Heather.
Being Trans has only effected my relationships because I allowed it I spent most of my life getting in relationships with women to try and get my family’s approval. Doing this made me hate myself and cause friction with my partner because she could tell that I did not want to have sex with her because to me I can’t just have sex solely to have sex I have been attracted to men ever since I was a kid women have never been my thing. So I guess being Trans has only effected my relationships because I allowed it. That’s why I have promised myself I won’t get into a relationship until I can find a good guy.
Ashley
Oh this is fun.
Hmmm… Well I’m definitely Hetro, but it has been noted that there’s some areas where I’m not the same “as other guys”
Like most here.. Intensely loyal to my SO, and a bit more sensitive to the feminine side of things. Every so often I have a deep and meaningful conversation with one of her/our friends, and the next thing I know, she’s getting some very complimentary comments on the husband she chose. I often wonder if they knew the whole of it, what the comments would be like. But hearing, “You’re lucky, my husband would never..” is always a little unsettling for the comparison
I think it has allowed me to have a better relationship with my wife than most guys seem capable of. I’ve lost count of the times a guy has been saying something and I’ve been thinking: “Why would you do something that obviously stupid”, and that awareness of the different nature has made me reluctant to talk of it with other guys. I very much suspect that I’m not unlike most here, at least if we’re talking pre-disclosure to the SO.
Having said that.. I’m no Saint.. and I’ve had time to wonder if my better understanding hasn’t been used by my drab side when we’ve disagreed on something to my advantage (mostly in my younger years when I was more black and white in my approach to things)
-Molly
My wife only suspects that I like to wear female clothes, mainly panties. She doesn’t know that I have a full fem wardrobe and that I’m gender fluid. I have to keep this a secret, because she will not accept, support, nor understand this part of me. It would be nice if I could come out to her, but I’m doing this for me and not to enhance our relationship. I’ve always had a feminine side and I don’t want to suppress it anymore.
You go girl.its a great feeling to finally be who you are ive always felt i was in the wrong body i love everything about being a woman only regret i didnt do it earlier in life
There was once a time in my younger years when I thought I would like to be in a heterosexual relationship and perhaps have children. As life has gone by I realised that that just wasn’t for me. I wouldn’t want to be in a homosexual relationship eather – that was never, ever my cup of tea.
I now realise that being single is what I wanted all along. My identity is one of the few aspects of my life where I am satisfied with my lot.
I’m a dedicated Singleton!
Take care girls.
Anne-Marie.Thanks Bobby. I think yourright Starting to beleave there are ni mire nice guy our there anymore id there is they dont live around here lol
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