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Well, I took what was for me a big step (literally) last night. For many of you this is no big deal, but for me…oh my, it’s something I have been trying to get up the courage to do. I was again traveling and booked a room at a Residence Inn in Sacramento. When I got there I realized this was the older style Residence Inn with 15 individual buildings, each with 4 rooms (2 upstairs and 2 downstairs). The rooms were all setup so that when you opened the front door, you were outside. I immediately thought “maybe tonight”. Later I got fully dressed in black stockings, 4” black heels,black dress, blonde wig, and assorted jewelry. My makeup looked great. Then as it got dark I kept staring out the window and could see my car in the distance in the parking lot. Finally, my heart racing, I opened the door…then closed it immediately! Agh! Can I do this? I waited a minute and then opened the door again and felt my foot move on its own, without any mental urging. I just seemed to be carried out the door, one step after the other. Oh my! My heart was racing as I walked down the stairs and turned toward the parking lot. I walked slowly and deliberately. Of courae walking slowly is a requirement in those heels. I walked by a man heading to the lobby and he said hello, then some younger girls and just smiled at them. When I finally reached my car, my entire body was shaking. I got in. And drove to the nearest gas station where I fueled up the rental car for its return the next morning. I got a stare from a man there fueling his car. Then back to the hotel and that long walk back from the parking lot. This time it was quiet and I only saw a few people in the distance. By the time I stepped back in my hotel room I had the biggest grin on my face and I verbally said “ you finally did it”.
It was a big night and big step for Brandy. I wonder what my next challenge will be. Gotta keep moving forward!
Congratulations, Brandy.
Thanks Stephanie
The thrill of victory ! Congratulations one small step at a time 🙂
🙂
Lisa: you are sooo right..very small steps in heels!
Great post Brandy, is it not great to experience being seen s a woman whilst in public, the energy rush is overwhelming. Sandra xx
Yes it is..thank you!!!!
That is Fabulous, Brandy!
So happy for you! That heart racing, anxious feeling is such a mix of emotions! Not to mention bravery!
Bravo for you Gurl!
Have fun, do take care and sounds like you looked wonderful!
Love and Hugs!
R
Rebekka: So true..thank you!
Hi Brandy B
Reading your adventure about leaving the security of your room I couldn’t help but remember the first time I ventured out dressed en.femme.
Everything you said about your feelings and the anxiety you were feeling was the same thing I went through
Our first time out were similar as we both were staying in a hotel room
On my way out to my car I was surprised to see that there were other guests in the parking lot and I had to walk past them.
One female spoke to me and I smiled at her and continued walking towards my car.
My legs were shaking as I opened the door to my car and got in
I put my seat belt on and was surprised to find that the strap was touching my breast when I fastioned the buckle
After checking my makeup and fixed my hair I started the car and drove to a mall near the hotel
After I parked my car I again had had to convince myself that I could pass before I got up the courage to get out of my car.
Finally I opened the door and got out then began walking to the entrance of the mall.
As I got closer to the entrance I saw that there were some construction workers working on the sidewalk and I had no choice but to continue walking towards them
When I got close to them they were checking me out and I just smiled at them and kept on walking past them
Actually that gave me the confidence to go in the mall and go window shopping
My reason for telling you this is because I want you to know that now that you’ve been out for the first time each time after the first time gets easier and soon you won’t be anxious about going out shopping or going to dinner as Brandy B
Hope this helps you to know that if I did It so can you
A friend
JanineHearing your story inspires me more. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!
Brandy,
Congratulations!! Many have never felt the need to take that step. Others may have but it is not their time. But it was your chance and you took it.
To many other small and big achievements!! 🥂🍾
gaby 💜
Thank you so much for your kind words Gaby!!!
Thank you Robin.
Thank you for sharing your story Brandy. I know that feeling well. I don’t remember the details of my first time out, but I still get that feeling when I leave my appartment. I live in a small complex in a small town. I know most of my neighbors but I have not told anyone about my dressing. So some nights, usually late, I will dress up, sneak out and walk around town. I am nervous the whole time! I once passed right by a friend, I looked away and I still don’t know if he recognized me. When I travel however, I walk around with confidence, not a worry in the world. It can be very liberatiting! I hope that you keep sharing your stories and photos, you look beautiful!
xoxo – Jesse
I totally understand that feeling! I think a lot of us do! I’m so happy for you that you made that step! It was SUCH a big moment for me when I went out the first time, especially in a dress and not just women’s jeans. The rush…the nerves…slightly shaking…heart racing…but HUGE smile on my lipstick painted lips!! Thanks for sharing! This made me smile 😊
Thank you Holly!
Very nice adventure
Great story Brandy! I’m really happy for you, sweetie!
I am in a similar place with Brie – taking small steps and counting my victories. I started out just walking the hotel hallways late at night. Then walking outside to the rental car and back. Then the first trip to a convenience store – probably took 2 hours of mental preparation for a 4 minute trip lol! Each small step was terrifying and thrilling at the same time. And each success brought a wonderful wave of self-confidence that I can draw on for the next trip.
I used to get mad at myself for these small trips – why was I so scared? why can’t I do more? But recently I’ve come to recognize them for what they are – small steps forward towards getting me where I want to be. Rather than worrying about I didn’t achieve while out, I’m focusing on the thrill of each victory of even being out. The change in my attitude has made all the difference. For my last trip, Brie was out in public for 3 hours – laundromat, grocery store, sandwich shop – all in 5″heels! It felt amazing and I can’t wait for the next trip!
I guess my point is that the size of our steps isn’t what matters. Every step forward counts!
Good luck with your next step Brandy. Be sure to let us know how it goes 🙂
-Brie
XOXOXO
Brie: Thank you so much for that.
Brandy
I am so happy for you girl that is a step I need to take and i will soon thanks for sharing I believe you looked lovely that night.
Jasmine: I truly appreciate you comments. Thanks!
Brandy
Absolutely the way to go!! Congratulations, it was much the same for me, the big step finally taken!
Thank you Janelle!!
Brandy
Brandy hun,
You are a beautiful woman.
If you were wearing either the red dress with the black trim or the black dress, i guarantee your decolletage was being checked out.Luv
DGood for you.
Thank you so much…I was hoping for some stares!!!!
Congrats!
Each step just leads to the next, as I’m finding out for myself.
This past Friday I had off & decided to let Patty work on the house. Got a bunch of projects done but needed a trip to Home Depot to finish one. Decided this was the day to finally go for it, alone.
Ended up going to 3 different stores & had lunch out as well. Was just so freeing to be out & about as Patty.
Cheers!
Patty
Oh my gosh Patty. Sounds like you ended up making a day of it!!!!!
Congrats!!!!
Brandy
Hi Brandy,
Well done you.
I have not yet been out dressed en femme but I am planning on doing something similar to you. I am going on a business trip to California in October and plan to make full use of the anonymity of being a long way from home.
Wish me luck!
Sophie: I do wish you the best of luck!!!! Would love to hear how it goes!
Brandy
He step out the door is the hardest but oh why a feeling when walking in public. I began walking down country road a night when there was little traffic or I could hear approaching cars. I then drove round town in my car. Later I walked along a beach and through quiet streets of a small town at night. I mustered courage to walk out in daylight. My wig wasn’t great so I wore a hood jumper and sun glasses and I thought I passed ok as a female. These walks were always short, not far from the safety of my car but where people could see me. The More times you do it the easier it becomes because you realise no one takes notice. But the adrenalin rush is always there and the next time can’t come soon enough.
I agree Felicity. I can’t wait until the next time!
Thanks,
Brandy
Thanks for sharing Brandy and congratulations on a very successful outing!
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